Why does it always take more for me?

princess34 said:

Why does it seem like it always take more for me than others? I am about to be 40 years old and I feel like I am existing and not living. It seems as though I always hear or see others getting blessed. I have even seen some people get blessed over and over while I just sit back and watch. I have also seen people who have done me wrong get blessed. Even as a child, my sister always was smarter and went to Ivy league schools. People always refer to me as quiet and some have said humble. I remember when I was about 13 or so my brother told me that people would start to compare me to her, which was kind of hurtful for him to say to me I still think about this today. People always compare me to others and always say I am quiet. He has also told me that I have a boring life. In middle school, I was considered the "worse" dancer as I tried out for the dance team several times and they finally let me on. It always seem like things in my life always come to a halt (jobs, relationships, friendships). When I went on job interviews a few years ago, I always got rejected until when I do land a job, it does not be all that and people always ostracize as being the quiet one. With relationships, I have had people to walk away and leave. I always seem to have short lived friendships and can remember when I tried to reach out to a friend several times in the past when we graduated and they never responded. (And it was not phone issues or anything and the person was active on social media). There have been friendships in which their numbers had changed and so we lost communication and connection. It is like things always come to a halt. I have never been considered a bad person to others because people usually tell me that I am nice. But why does it seem like I am always last and always have to watch others continually be blessed?

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This is obviously just my opinion as a fellow Christian. I am not an authority on the bible or this subject per se (other than personally relating to some of the thoughts you've expressed).

The general sentiment you share in this posting shared by many, at times,.myself included. I'm going through a great deal right now so I will try to be objective even though I am also struggling with similar questions internally.

The approach I've taken is pragmatic and spiritual in nature in that I continue to pray and hope God guides me. "Thy will be done" is a vital tenet of mine, a belief that God plans for my life will be achieved. I don't know you so I can't speak to your quiet nature, but, that need not be a barrier in your life, maybe you are introspective and/or just enjoy substantive conversation. I am often that way as well.

We need not compare ourselves, we need not judge (or be judged), we need not covet what others have. I try to focus on my life and Gods role in it. I pray for guidance and work to be the best person I can be, even in very trying circumstances. We should all keep the Faith and do our best each day.

In the end, what does your own Faith tell you? You probably have the answer already. God Bless.

Hi @princess34

What did the Messiah say? Did he say...

"blessed are the blessed, blessed are those who have many friends, blessed are the smart and exciting, blessed are the good dancers, blessed are the successful and skilled"?

This life is not meant to be about how successful you are. It's a training ground for the true life to come. Each of us need to be trained if different ways and you shouldn't see someone else's 'gold medal' in this life as any indication of a 'gold medal' waiting in the next. In fact, the opposite is often true.

But what will you do if you see every one else around you seem to do so well and you not? Will you step off the path of righteousness? Will you compromise yourself and the truth for a piece of their happiness? Will you lose faith? Will you become envious? These are the tests you might be facing.

So don't look outward and downward, but look inward and upward.

As for unrighteous people seeming to be so successful when then righteous struggle, I recommend you meditate on Psalm 73.

Peace.

Nothing wrong in who YOU are.

You sound like a nice caring person.

Embrace that. Trust in God.

God bless you

Emotionally draining is what one could feel after years being called the “nice person”, yet....your life is in still mode. Is that what’s happening to you?
Totally Understandable.
We are not perfect creatures.
Once you’ve reached that limit of waiting for things to happen or change to the way you’ve imagined, you will realize that there’s much more in this fragile life we get on earth. Hold on to hope. Keep your faith strong.
(Hugs)

princess34 said:

Why does it seem like it always take more for me than others? I am about to be 40 years old and I feel like I am existing and not living. It seems as though I always hear or see others getting blessed, even some people younger than me. I have even seen some people get blessed over and over while I just sit back and watch. I have also seen people who have done me wrong get blessed. Even as a child, my sister always was smarter and went to Ivy league schools. People always refer to me as quiet and some have said humble. I remember when I was about 13 or so my brother told me that people would start to compare me to her, which was kind of hurtful for him to say to me I still think about this today. People always compare me to others and always say I am quiet. He has also told me that I have a boring life. In middle school, I was considered the "worse" dancer as I tried out for the dance team several times and they finally let me on. It always seem like things in my life always come to a halt (jobs, relationships, friendships). When I went on job interviews a few years ago, I always got rejected until when I do land a job, it does not be all that and people always ostracize as being the quiet one. With relationships, I have had people to walk away and leave. I always seem to have short lived friendships and can remember when I tried to reach out to a friend several times in the past when we graduated and they never responded. (And it was not phone issues or anything and the person was active on social media). There have been friendships in which their numbers had changed and so we lost communication and connection. It is like things always come to a halt. I have never been considered a bad person to others because people usually tell me that I am nice. But why does it seem like I am always last and always have to watch others continually be blessed?

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I guess I am not sure by what you mean that " others are getting blessed". It sounds like you have a problem with our Lord and His will. Blessings start from the ability to recognize them. Take a step back from comparison and begin to count the ways God has blessed you. Start with ,giving you life, and go from there. You will see how quickly your list will grow and you will begin to thank Him for it.
Be blessed.

princess34 said:

Why does it seem like it always take more for me than others? I am about to be 40 years old and I feel like I am existing and not living. It seems as though I always hear or see others getting blessed, even some people younger than me. I have even seen some people get blessed over and over while I just sit back and watch. I have also seen people who have done me wrong get blessed. Even as a child, my sister always was smarter and went to Ivy league schools. People always refer to me as quiet and some have said humble. I remember when I was about 13 or so my brother told me that people would start to compare me to her, which was kind of hurtful for him to say to me I still think about this today. People always compare me to others and always say I am quiet. He has also told me that I have a boring life. In middle school, I was considered the "worse" dancer as I tried out for the dance team several times and they finally let me on. It always seem like things in my life always come to a halt (jobs, relationships, friendships). When I went on job interviews a few years ago, I always got rejected until when I do land a job, it does not be all that and people always ostracize as being the quiet one. With relationships, I have had people to walk away and leave. I always seem to have short lived friendships and can remember when I tried to reach out to a friend several times in the past when we graduated and they never responded. (And it was not phone issues or anything and the person was active on social media). There have been friendships in which their numbers had changed and so we lost communication and connection. It is like things always come to a halt. I have never been considered a bad person to others because people usually tell me that I am nice. But why does it seem like I am always last and always have to watch others continually be blessed?

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We often do not know the reasons for Gods providence …. However we can trust Him. He knows everything …. We do not. Why He allows some things to happen and other things not to happen we simply do not know.

How people treat one another is each ones choice and we have no control over some one else’s choices … we do have control of our own choices.

That is not to say the choices we make for ourselves will produce a good or expected outcome …. It may seem so but end up not being so.

Life is full of unexpected occurrences And outcomes.

I'm 51 years old. I'm going to relay some of my own life experiences, in the hopes that it will help you. This might be a ramble, so I apologize ahead of time.

At some point in my pre-teen/early teen years, I had a verbally abusive step father who would ground me all of the time for not doing what he wanted me to do correctly; usually a menial task that he found some fault with. In order to cope with the constant stress, I became an introvert, and I would not talk unless spoken to. I would sit in a room full of people and be content to say nothing. I was always called quiet, because I was.

I was somewhat an outcast in middle school and my first two years of high school. I was very timid. It wasn't until my junior year, when I decided to switch to vocational school, that I made some friends with classmates who helped me come out of my shell. Out of high school, I got a job at the local telephone company as an operator. I had to overcome being quiet and introverted to talk to customers and reason with them. Both of these things helped me to "normalize" my social skills.

I used to have a low opinion of myself, because of my inability to stand up for myself, to speak up for myself. My quiet introverted nature kept me from being able to handle social situations. I was bullied in school really bad, and I was too afraid to do anything about it. I was scared to even walk home from school on a daily basis because of the experiences I had with bullies. One even followed me home and tricked me into holding his gloves so he could punch me in the face.

Things in our lives shape us into who we are, whether it be an abusive step father, or bullies at school, or people who treat us badly because we're not popular. As I described, I fixed the quiet issue through friends and work, but there were other underlying issues I had to resolve.

My strict Christian upbringing skewed my ability to identify with others in a proper way. I put some people on pedestals and some beneath me. I had to figure out some hard truths, because I couldn't deal with people in the correct way. How did I fix the problem? I removed the biases I had in my mind and readjusted my thinking to understand that we are all equal in God's eyes, and no one person is better than any other.

This led me to come to the conclusion that it doesn't matter what other people think of me. What matters is what God thinks of me. God is not a bully. God does not treat me less than. God does not want me to stay inside myself and hide from the world. I have worth. I am a human being that He created. I have just as much right to be, to do, to say, as anyone else. I stopped caring what other people think, which freed me from the unrealistic and unattainable expectations I put on myself, and that I thought others expected of me.

I started being outspoken with complete strangers, striking up casual conversations at restaurants, at the store, in the park. I interacted with people. My social skills improved to the point where I functioned normally. I started to interact with people through my hobbies and interests, putting myself out there and meeting new people. It really helped.

Given the way people have treated me in life, I could come away with the idea that I'm just not worth it, that everything is stacked against me. That's the introvert in me talking. The truth is nothing can keep you from achieving your goals in life. You have the ability to achieve anything you want, despite how others may treat you. The way other people are shows that they have problems too. They project their problems onto you, making you feel less than when you're not, and elevating themselves, which ends up being fruitless and empty for them in the long run.

I've had to let go of friends from high school, because we grew apart, or had little in common, or because of their chosen lifestyle. It's part of life, and normal. I've been mistreated by friends throughout my life. Where before I would just accept it, I reached a point where I started to break the ties and let them go, because I know I did my part, and they didn't live up to the standards of friendship. Unfortunately, you do have to let people go at times in your life.

People are going to treat you badly. It's just a part of life. Whether friendships or relationships. I've had my fair share of bad experiences and heartbreak. It doesn't have to define you in a negative way. You can use it as a learning tool, so that you can do better and correct your own issues, and also have the strength to let go of people who treat you wrong, and move on.

I guess what I'm saying is there are ways to overcome things in your life that you feel are keeping you down. It just takes some looking at the root causes and working to change them.

It is important that we understand our own worth, because God created us; to have confidence in God's decision for us to exist and be a part of this world. We belong here, because of Him, and no one person can say or do anything to change that. Let go of your perceptions of what others think and know that God made you in His image. This pretty much negates anything anyone else can do or say against you when you know for a fact that you're an upright and good person.

Regarding blessings. I used to feel like I had no connection to God and I was not receiving anything from Him whatsoever. It caused me to leave the church at an early age and spend a good chunk of my adult life as a non-Christian. When I came back around to Christianity again and surrendered my life to God, I was given hindsight so that I could see how God was with me every step of the way. I saw the many blessings throughout my life that I had not even noticed or took for granted. God blesses us according to His will and purpose, which often times is not in the way we expect, and so it can feel like we're not being blessed at all, but the truth is God does bless us.

Those are my thoughts, based on my experiences. I hope you can find something in my post that will help you. God bless!

I used to feel that way myself. Blessings come in all shapes and sizes.

My mother and father separated/divorced before I was self-aware.

I grew up living with my mother in poverty, but we always had food to eat. I always had a bicycle to ride, despite the fact that we were on welfare. God blessed me with so many things in my childhood. In fact, if I hadn't had the hard childhood I did, I wouldn't have been prepared to live on a low income at retirement, and be able to cook depression era meals to stretch my food budget.

I used to be jealous of kids who had all the toys, and the fancy clothes at school. I had hand-me-downs and Goodwill clothes. Mom used to buy us the cheapest shoes. One time she bought shoes from this huge cardboard box that had plastic soles. They were so uncomfortable to walk in, but I had to wear them or go without.

My father made minimum wage most of his life, and at one point could barely afford to make bologna sandwiches. Money was always tight. It wasn't until my high school years that my father got a break and a nice job, but it only lasted 10 years (laid off), then he was right back to working a minimum wage job for the rest of his life.

I was fortunate enough to get hired into the local telephone company as a temporary employee out of high school (1989), which was a huge opportunity back then, as the telephone company was a solid career. I got laid off twice but I called and got back into my first position as they were hiring again, and this time I was able to stick around until they hired me full time.

Eight years in I couldn't take the stressful operator job anymore, so I jumped at the opportunity to study and test for electronics and digital tests (internal) that opened me up to be able to bid on technical jobs. I tested and passed and took a job in a nearby city that would be my career for the next 22 years, until I retired. Where before I was living on welfare, now I was blessed to have a well paying job, good benefits and even a pension.

As I mentioned earlier, I am now retired and living on a meager pension. I could've taken the lump sum and had a higher payout, but I would've been subject to stock market fluctuations, which would've been a constant worry. I didn't want to have to worry about whether my nest egg was going to be there tomorrow, so I took the lower paying pension and now live on what I consider to be low income.

Why tell you all of this? I've been at the lowest points a person can have in life. I've been at the highest points a person can have in life. I can tell you that the blessings were always there, and I was thankful for each and every one, no matter how small. Even through the lowest of the lows, when we didn't have two pennies to rub together, we were happy and thankful for what we had.

It doesn't matter what someone else has, they can have the world and still be miserable in life and you wouldn't even know it. That phrase "count your blessings" is true. I now live much like I lived as a child. I buy food on sale, use coupons, make meals that last, have little to no extra money, but I'm perfectly happy with my station in life.

I have had so many blessings in my life that I would have to write a book about it. If I focused on the negatives, that I don't have what others have, that I'm poor, that I have to wear the same shirts and pants every day of the week (now, in retirement) because I can't afford new ones, then I would have a really bad outlook on life. Instead, I cherish every blessing I have and I'm totally happy.

I've had the high paying job, making upwards to $70,000-80,000 a year, and I can tell you that sure it's nice to have the extra money, but I'm just as happy living on a low income now. It's all about perspective, and focusing on the positive in your life rather than the negative, and cherishing what God gives you.

princess34 said:

Why does it seem like it always take more for me than others? I am about to be 40 years old and I feel like I am existing and not living. It seems as though I always hear or see others getting blessed, even some people younger than me. I have even seen some people get blessed over and over while I just sit back and watch. I have also seen people who have done me wrong get blessed. Even as a child, my sister always was smarter and went to Ivy league schools. People always refer to me as quiet and some have said humble. I remember when I was about 13 or so my brother told me that people would start to compare me to her, which was kind of hurtful for him to say to me I still think about this today. People always compare me to others and always say I am quiet. He has also told me that I have a boring life. In middle school, I was considered the "worse" dancer as I tried out for the dance team several times and they finally let me on. It always seem like things in my life always come to a halt (jobs, relationships, friendships). When I went on job interviews a few years ago, I always got rejected until when I do land a job, it does not be all that and people always ostracize as being the quiet one. With relationships, I have had people to walk away and leave. I always seem to have short lived friendships and can remember when I tried to reach out to a friend several times in the past when we graduated and they never responded. (And it was not phone issues or anything and the person was active on social media). There have been friendships in which their numbers had changed and so we lost communication and connection. It is like things always come to a halt. I have never been considered a bad person to others because people usually tell me that I am nice. But why does it seem like I am always last and always have to watch others continually be blessed?

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Psa 91 comes to mind. You know we do so many things in this life by faith not even knowing it. I can fully understand many things you have said here and you would be really surprised at how many believers feel the same way. Ask Him to show you how He sees you. Its not how this world sees you that matters. Once we get past that we find the only one that matters is Him. And trust me here though you don't know me you are not seeing what He does and He can not lie. He does not make mistakes. Its can be very hard for our Father to work in our life's when we speak negative and doubt. Speak words of life, like the joy of the lord is my strength. Its always there for us when we feel week and sad but He can not force us to receive it. When fear comes no He has not given me the spirit of fear but of power love and a sound mind. I put on the whole armor of God. I am strong in the power of His might. I have the peace of God which passes all understanding keeps and guards my mind in Christ Jesus. I can keep going. See we can not ever walk this walk without Christ. We have to lean on Him trust Him in those times of darkness where its so quite and I can't hear Him see Him I praise Him.. I raise my hands and sing praises to Him. I trust that no matter what I see what I feel what I hear He is with me He is in me He is doing working everything around me for my good.

So we see this beautiful tree and we also here this "go for it take bite..ooh looks really delicious". We always have a choice. So we can go by what we see and believe that is just the way it is or we can step aside let Him lead and know He has something wonderful great... inspiring... <--- that is not the word I was going to use yet it came out in my thinking over another word I was going to say. Something wonderful great inspiring for you. You just have faith in Him. Tell Him what you want what you need.. then KNOW no matter what you see or hear.. He hears and will answer. I only speak on what I know. I KNOW if we trust Him no matter what.

Isa 41:10 it is the Old Testament. Gods words are never old and it was written for you "‘Do not fear [anything], for I am with you; Do not be afraid, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, be assured I will help you; I will certainly take hold of you with My righteous right hand [a hand of justice, of power, of victory, of salvation]."

princess34 said:

Why does it seem like it always take more for me than others? I am about to be 40 years old and I feel like I am existing and not living. It seems as though I always hear or see others getting blessed, even some people younger than me. I have even seen some people get blessed over and over while I just sit back and watch. I have also seen people who have done me wrong get blessed. Even as a child, my sister always was smarter and went to Ivy league schools. People always refer to me as quiet and some have said humble. I remember when I was about 13 or so my brother told me that people would start to compare me to her, which was kind of hurtful for him to say to me I still think about this today. People always compare me to others and always say I am quiet. He has also told me that I have a boring life. In middle school, I was considered the "worse" dancer as I tried out for the dance team several times and they finally let me on. It always seem like things in my life always come to a halt (jobs, relationships, friendships). When I went on job interviews a few years ago, I always got rejected until when I do land a job, it does not be all that and people always ostracize as being the quiet one. With relationships, I have had people to walk away and leave. I always seem to have short lived friendships and can remember when I tried to reach out to a friend several times in the past when we graduated and they never responded. (And it was not phone issues or anything and the person was active on social media). There have been friendships in which their numbers had changed and so we lost communication and connection. It is like things always come to a halt. I have never been considered a bad person to others because people usually tell me that I am nice. But why does it seem like I am always last and always have to watch others continually be blessed?

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I used to wonder why I was not enjoying my life. My life was not that much different from anyone else. There were good times and bad. Ups and downs. But others seemed to be having fun and were... well, happy. Where was my joy? I concluded that it was not my life or my experiences, rather there was something in me. What was I doing that prevented me from "loving life??"
I came across this scripture:

1 Peter 3:10-11 KJV
10. For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile:
11. Let him eschew evil, and do good; let him seek peace, and ensue it.

I wanted, no, needed to love life! I needed to see good days. That for my own mental and spiritual health. It is no fun going through a life with no joy.

I don't know you and do not know if this is applicable to you or your situation.
But it helped me.

Your soul life is your words. They can make you or break you. A matter of attitude and perception.

James 3:6 KJV
6. And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell.

And as far as attitude I memorized this verse:

Philippians 4:6-8 KJV
6. Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.
7. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
8. Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

princess34 said:

I just feel as though everyone else is living their life being blessed while mine is stuck and stagnant. Its as if some people are pre chosen to be blessed in life because as I have stated, I have seen some people get blessed multiple times. I just feel like nothing exciting happens for me as it does with others.

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Let's dig deeper into that last sentence of yours... what are the kinds of exciting things you want to have happen to you?

This will likely not help you much but something to think about perhaps.

The giants of faith in the scriptures, those who were closest to God, and called to be nearest to Him, suffered the most in the flesh and had times of intense fleshly trial.

Perhaps, just perhaps, your apparent lack of blessing is not that God has overlooked you or passed you by, but He is calling you closer. Earthly possessions and blessings are cool, but they can get in the way of whats truly important. Our relationship with God our Father.

@princess34 I understand where you are coming from.

I have an aunt that is married to a false Christian. I am aware that she has adopted a certain amount of his unbiblical beliefs. And then when she prays for something, it happens. I've gotten mad at God about it because how can God answer her prayers when she has adopted unbiblical beliefs and then it seems like he doesn't answer my prayers.

I am also a quiet person and shy. I don't talk much. At work over the years at multiple companies someone's always gotta say something about me being quiet. "Why don't you talk?" Because I'm working, what is so hard about that? Why should I stand around in a circle, yakking to other people for long amounts of time and waste work time?

I don't have much friends either. They've been leaving me a long amount of time. But they were bad people anyway. I've been trying to make new friends at work, plus I had joined this forum some time last year.

And I am also lonely. I don't have a husband (no boyfriend either) and I do not have children. I just work and come home; if I get out, it's to go to work, get gas, and go to the grocery store.

You need to pray to God about how you are feeling. Tell Him everything - even though He already knows how you feel, He wants you to share your feelings and concerns with Him. If you want change to happen, tell Him you want change and let Him handle that.

I had been in an bad retail job when I found out that I could talk to God about my problems and allow Him to fix the situation. When I let God do that, my life has been changing for the better (but I still experience bad things; that's something that nobody can avoid).

I believe you are blessed in some way, you just need to identify those blessings. You must possess something - a gift, a skill, a certain person in your life, etc.

princess34 said:

Does God have favorites? I continue to keep seeing people receiving multiple blessings in their life.

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It only seems like that. Some of this is only random luck of the draw. Some has to do with the circumstances of your birth. Of course God does intervene into the default value of absolute poverty for us all. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. What happens in between is affected by many things. Fate and circumstance plays large in it.

Ecclesiastes 9:11-12 KJV
11. I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all.
12. For man also knoweth not his time: as the fishes that are taken in an evil net, and as the birds that are caught in the snare; so are the sons of men snared in an evil time, when it falleth suddenly upon them.

Our economy is about to take one of those massive downturns. This effects everyone. But God can and does intervene on your behalf.
Gods role in your life is largely affected by our faith attitude.
If you cannot agree with this 100%, it will be evident in your life:

Hebrews 11:6 KJV
6. But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him.

So we ask if all really believe He is a rewarder of the diligent seeker? If the answer is anything but yes... we have a clue.

Do we believe these simple statements?

John 14:13-14 KJV
13. And whatsoever ye shall ask in my name, that will I do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son.
14. If ye shall ask any thing in my name, I will do it.

John 15:7 KJV
7. If ye abide in me, and my words abide in you, ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done unto you.

John 16:23-24 KJV
23. And in that day ye shall ask me nothing. Verily, verily, I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall ask the Father in my name, he will give it you.
24. Hitherto have ye asked nothing in my name: ask, and ye shall receive, that your joy may be full.

If one waffles on these, or looks for reasons why they are not included in these, then that must be considered.
Today "prosperity" gets a bad rap. It has been both presented in a bad way and attacked ignorantly. God wants you blessed in every way you can be blessed. And He has already done everything needed to make that happen.

3 John 1:2 KJV
2. Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper and be in health, even as thy soul prospereth.

Ephesians 1:3 KJV
3. Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who hath blessed us with all spiritual blessings in heavenly places in Christ:

These are not things that we even have to pray for any longer. They have already been done. Jesus provided everything for us in the atonement. We have been redeemed from the curse of the law.
Galatians 3:13 KJV
13. Christ hath redeemed us from the curse of the law, being made a curse for us: for it is written, Cursed is every one that hangeth on a tree:

2 Corinthians 1:20 KJV
20. For all the promises of God in him are yea, and in him Amen, unto the glory of God by us.

So if we want to break out of the poverty and sickness cycle, part of that has to do with changing our faith attitude toward God. He has blessed me. He is blessing me. He will bless me. Begin to praise Him for blessing us even in hard times. Even when the answer does not appear. Hold fast to the confession of our faith. Believe Him. Believe what He has already done for us.
And one of the things I constantly remind believers is to not contradict Him. If He said we have something, do not contradict Him and say we do not. We are well able to take the land. To say otherwise is considered a wicked and evil report. Not that He wants to punish us for our weakness, but our denial of Him and His word brings this on us. We must believe He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him. Regardless of what is happening around us. Our confession is YES YES.

princess34 said:

Why does it seem like it always take more for me than others? I am about to be 40 years old and I feel like I am existing and not living. It seems as though I always hear or see others getting blessed, even some people younger than me. I have even seen some people get blessed over and over while I just sit back and watch. I have also seen people who have done me wrong get blessed. Even as a child, my sister always was smarter and went to Ivy league schools. People always refer to me as quiet and some have said humble. I remember when I was about 13 or so my brother told me that people would start to compare me to her, which was kind of hurtful for him to say to me I still think about this today. People always compare me to others and always say I am quiet. He has also told me that I have a boring life. In middle school, I was considered the "worse" dancer as I tried out for the dance team several times and they finally let me on. It always seem like things in my life always come to a halt (jobs, relationships, friendships). When I went on job interviews a few years ago, I always got rejected until when I do land a job, it does not be all that and people always ostracize as being the quiet one. With relationships, I have had people to walk away and leave. I always seem to have short lived friendships and can remember when I tried to reach out to a friend several times in the past when we graduated and they never responded. (And it was not phone issues or anything and the person was active on social media). There have been friendships in which their numbers had changed and so we lost communication and connection. It is like things always come to a halt. I have never been considered a bad person to others because people usually tell me that I am nice. But why does it seem like I am always last and always have to watch others continually be blessed?

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One of the most beautiful things about the Holy Spirit is it doesn’t matter how we feel about ourselves, nor our hurtful emotions over what wrong may have been done to us. He heals it in an instant - like it was never there - that’s when we walk in the Spirit. Its like you witness two plains. When we are emotional, fearful, sad, comparing ourselves, etc, we are in the Carmel mind and are walking by the flesh - the old man. But when we walk according to the Spirit - we walk in the new man, and the Carmel nature is wiped away - it’s gone like it never existed - it’s the Power of God. It’s a pouring down that you have to experience to understand - that’s how it feels - a pouring down of the Spirit and it’s beautiful. It’s like you can’t even identify the feelings you had - and those you disliked, you don’t even recognize the dislike or hurt anymore, you only recognize love.

Walk by the Spirit! Ask God for guidance.