Babbling in pseudo languages is NOT what speaking in tongues means in the biblical sense. The Charismatic movement has corrupted what Paul was talking about. When people spoke in tongues it was in a setting where where you had a bunch of people traveling to Jerusalem, and then a bunch of Galileans started speaking in foreign languages around them all proclaiming the gospel in the languages of the people who'd gathered there. So they'd hear Persian, and Greek, and Aramaic, and Hebrew and Egyptian and whatever else had gathered there.
Not the stuff you see on word of faith televangelist shows.
frankly what you describe is actually terrifying, because it's the same manifestations that happen in Hinduism and Buddhism when people are seized by Kundalini spirits.
but as to my isolation, I get the feel like I am being trained for something, training is sometimes hard.
and I don't know what God would be training a cripple for in isolation.
but that is what it feels like, like being trained in boot camp. The best I can figure is to isolate myself with God, go through spiritual warfare daily, and make myself only able to rely on Jesus to get me through it, to make myself totally dependent on Him.
and for lack of better words.. like breaking a horse so that you can ride it.
Is God going to use me? Maybe
I don't know what for, what does He do with a cripple?
But nothing else makes sense.
The isolation was so perfectly timed, so many stacking coincidences at once.