Toxic Positivity

Joy in trials and pleasure in afflictions is what the Bible says. Always somebody to go too far.

Hello @littlestar777, as Christians, we are capable of expressing both hope and joy, even in the most difficult circumstances, because we know the Lord and we trust Him (which includes trusting in the promises that He's made to us as believers/as His adopted children). For instance,

So, while we may not be happy about how things are going for us in the moment, we endure the times of hardship knowing that God has everything in His precious hands, that He is causing ALL things (both the good and the bad) to work together for our good/for our sanctification (which is God the Father making us more and more like His Son, Jesus Christ).

Personally, I believe that I have grown more in Christlikeness during/following a time of difficulty (that I have had to endure for a time) than I do when I am in the midst of enjoying times that are pleasant. As Pastor Charles H. Spurgeon once wrote (regarding what he had come to realize about the bad/difficult times that he faced in his life),

So, while we Christians should not pretend that all is wonderful in our lives when it actually is not (especially if pressed), neither should we to act as ones who have no hope, or be angry/bitter about the painful circumstances that we are facing in the moment, since we know that He loves us, always wants the very best for us, and is always at work in our lives to make them, and us, better.

I hope that helps a bit. If not, please let me know.

Thanks!

--David
p.s. - here is another thought along these lines for you to consider, from pastor and theologian A.W. Pink.

It seems to me that my aches and pains are worse when my wife is watching.

littlestar777 said:

I have a very few senior Christian friends and even Pastor teaching me to just "smile" in any difficult situation.

Click to expand...

May I suggest that you ask them why?
How do they activly put Romans 12:15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.
Into practice, do they care about other people?

Yes it says those who mourn but what about those with problems doesn't Gal 6:2 Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. 3 If anyone thinks they are something when they are not, they deceive themselves.

Ask them how are they carrying the burdens of those who have difficulties.

If they cannot answer and show how they do this, leave that church.

Tolworth John said:

May I suggest that you ask them why?
How do they activly put Romans 12:15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.
Into practice, do they care about other people?

Yes it says those who mourn but what about those with problems doesn't Gal 6:2 Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. 3 If anyone thinks they are something when they are not, they deceive themselves.

Ask them how are they carrying the burdens of those who have difficulties.

If they cannot answer and show how they do this, leave that church.

Click to expand...

Sounds like the power of positive thinking which has its roots in the occult.

Oscarr said:

Sounds like the power of positive thinking which has its roots in the occult.

Click to expand...

Please could you explain how those biblical verses are ' the power of positive thinking' and also give your understanding of the meaning of those verses.

The Greek word fro hypocrisy to to speak from under a mask. We are first and foremost to seek and follow truth. Others may feel uncomfortable if we honestly express how we feel. However, it is better to avoid those who might be offended than pretend that we are something we are not.

littlestar777 said:

What is Christian view on toxic positivity? How do you express your pain or do you even express your pain?

I have a very few senior Christian friends and even Pastor teaching me to just "smile" in any difficult situation.

Say, some is in moderate stomach pain mode, we went for jungle trekking and during the session he/she said turning to extreme stomach pain from moderate pain so we gotta stop the journey. They should tell me earlier right and not keep smiling else i will think they're ok? They're should be taking rest? And we all not need to waste the half way effort too.

Another situation is, senior Christian's dad is keep complaining the stomach is very painful and suspect having critical illness. Then she just tell his dad smile and go to see Doctor yet don't complaint so much. I thought she supposes to listen and understand more about the pain?

Source
Why Toxic Positivity Can Be So Harmful

You may help me to correct my grammar My apologies cause English is not my first language.

Click to expand...

Luke 6:31 "Do to others as you would have them do to you."

timf said:

The Greek word fro hypocrisy to to speak from under a mask. We are first and foremost to seek and follow truth. Others may feel uncomfortable if we honestly express how we feel. However, it is better to avoid those who might be offended than pretend that we are something we are not.

Click to expand...

I'm standing in line at the checkout counter at the store and when it's my turn, the guy there politely asks, "How are you today Sir?". I said to him, "Well I'm going to say fine and spare you my grievances". He then replied, "I appreciate that very much".

Tolworth John said:

Please could you explain how those biblical verses are ' the power of positive thinking' and also give your understanding of the meaning of those verses.

Click to expand...

I was responding to the advice of "smiling through" when problems arise, not the Biblical verses you quoted.

Oscarr said:

I was responding to the advice of "smiling through" when problems arise, not the Biblical verses you quoted.

Click to expand...

Shows the importance of quoting the post one is replying to.

littlestar777 said:

What is Christian view on toxic positivity? How do you express your pain or do you even express your pain?

I have a very few senior Christian friends and even Pastor teaching me to just "smile" in any difficult situation.

Say, some is in moderate stomach pain mode, we went for jungle trekking and during the session he/she said turning to extreme stomach pain from moderate pain so we gotta stop the journey. They should tell me earlier right and not keep smiling else i will think they're ok? They're should be taking rest? And we all not need to waste the half way effort too.

Another situation is, senior Christian's dad is keep complaining the stomach is very painful and suspect having critical illness. Then she just tell his dad smile and go to see Doctor yet don't complaint so much. I thought she supposes to listen and understand more about the pain?

Click to expand...

Pain has the power to grip a person's attention so that they see nothing else. And when a person focuses on their pain, it grows larger and more painful. Talking about pain can quickly become a habit, too, turning into complaining and general sourness.

It's quite all right, of course, to acknowledge that one is in pain. But going on and on about it serves no good purpose, if all that can be done for the pain has been done. Sometimes, one must simply learn to live with pain, which involves learning not to fixate on the pain and, by constant complaint about it, to make one's pain everyone else's problem.

When I die in great pain, I want to give my kids a smile and a wink when I take my last breath.

I have a granddaughter whom I love very much. I began to notice that at around the age of seven that if she wasn't laughing and having fun, she was otherwise generally unhappy and feeling down.

So, one day seeing her sad, I said to her that she needed to learn to be glad for no reason so as to be at peace. I could tell she didn't want to hear about it, as if she thought I could not relate. Her response was silence and what I had said only seemed to add to her sour mood.

So, I said gleefully, that if she wanted, I could make her happy. She then broke her silence and out of curiosity asked, "how can you make me happy?". I then said I could slap her on the leg over and over and that she would be happy when I stopped. She then smiled at the thought and her mood changed.

You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.

At some point we all experience pain and physical discomfort. But that doesn’t mean we should spend our days discussing it or sharing our woes continually.

And if more people ceased to do so you’d have less depression, anxiety, sickness, and related problems.

Find something good to discuss. Something uplifting to focus on. The bible says the same.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

We can pray until we are encouraged, then maybe tell people we have a problem but we are doing are doing well in spite of it, and ask how the person is doing.

Jim Henson, creator of The Muppets, died of pneumonia at 53 years of age. Had he gotten treated he should have survived it. Some say he didn't care enough about himself to think his health mattered.

Focusing too much on yourself can be negative, but the other extreme has consequences too. There are times when problems need to be discussed or dealt with. On the other hand, there will always be issues people have, and to fixate on them endlessly makes life worse. It becomes a glass half empty mindset where you can't appreciate the good things.

People who are happiest are those that remind themselves of their blessings. "This is the day the LORD has made. We will rejoice and be glad in it." - Psalms 118:24