Ok, let's try and tackle this 100% neutrally and logically and objectively if we can, OK...
Most of the NT, if not all of it, is reported to have been written by the people we have reports of them having been written by, at around 20 to 30 to 40 years after Jesus was here, etc, and there is no evidence at all whatsoever of them having been changed or altered very much after that, by say, with the formation of the RCC after that or whatever, etc, or even after that even or whatever, etc, and certainly no good or logical reason to believe they were just 100% completely fabricated or were 100% totally false or were completely made up, etc, because that is just so very illogical and so very unreasonable that it is to the point of being "absurd", etc...
So, what follows then, is that we have some people, who think they saw, or at least heard from some others who saw (him), or a certain man named Jesus, who was alive and existed around that time, do and perform many miracles while he was alive, and then was crucified by the Romans, and then that some think they even saw him and interacted with him even after he was dead, but in a kind of "different" resurrected body, but still a physical form that they could see, and hear and touch and interact with, and that he came back after he was dead and interacted with them, etc...
But some people like you, not only don't believe it, and not only just don't want to believe it, but want to cast so much doubt on it however you can, to the point to where everybody will find a way to, not only just not believe it, but to where people will just simply flat out deny it all, in any way you or they can, or that you can convince them they can, etc...
You won't even acknowledge even the possibility of it being true, because of your deep down "hatred", or "whatever it is", etc, that wants people to just flat out deny it, and believe, like you, that it just simply cannot at all be true, and this is "just because", etc...
It does not at all matter to you if it's even possible or not, because you're so full of hatred, or malice, or bitterness, or jealousy/envy or "whatever", or some kind of "personal problem" or issue to be sure, or whatever, etc, that you just want people to deny it all in any way they can, or that you convince them they can, and this is again, "just because", etc...
And your so directly tunnel vision focused on just only that being your primary motivation or reason or focus or whatever, that the real truth of it does not matter at all to you, and probably never has, etc...
And you probably hate people who believe in anything at all so very much, only because you do not at all believe in anything at all, and you just simply don't like the way that makes you feel deep down on the inside, because it makes you feel "inadequate" or "less" or "whatever", etc, because secretly you want to believe in something, anything at all really, but just cannot bring yourself to, and you hate that so very much that it's at the point of "despising", etc, and so it makes you so very desperate to do whatever you feel you can or must to destroy all those others just simply so you won't have to feel the way you do about yourself anymore, or "despise yourself despising them" anymore, etc, or have it turn inward, etc, because you just couldn't face that, etc, and that's your true motivation and/or reason for being on here and doing what you are doing, or are trying to be doing, etc, and it isn't about "truth" at all, and is the "furtherest thing from it", etc...
Anyway, don't lie to me, etc, because I can so very easily see through all that "garbage/poop/excrement", and it makes me "very very angry", etc...
If you didn't feel the way I just said, you just simply wouldn't be here doing what your trying to be doing, so don't be lying to me about it...
Like I said, I can see through it...
And it makes me "angry", etc...
You feeling the way you do about yourself in nobody else's problem but your own, so go solve it on your own, and leave other people alone until you do, OK...
And "don't lie to me", because I don't like being lied to, etc...
God Bless!