What DID you think about turning 30?

unpardoned1 said:

Thank you. He has just put so much emphasis on looks even though he says he loves me if I were burnt in a fire, but he still talks about looks all the time so its hard to believe.

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Remember Men tend to be Visual creatures, so it's natural for them.
Sorry for the generalizations brothers

I was scared to turn 30 now I'm scared of going down that 40 hill

unpardoned1 said:

I think my stresses are more vanity related. I hate to admit that. My husband has always been very "into" me and I'm scared of losing that. I didn't want to lose the 2 because I've been comfortable and secure being twenty somthing. I get scared of losing beauty. Again, I'm sorry because I know this is vain and wrong but I can only tell this to you. Everyone, especially my mother has always put alot of emphasis on my looks. My husband has kind of picked up where she left off (I got married at 16) Even the rest of my family has done this. I feel pressure to always look "great" because I don't want to lose this and I'm worried my 30's will make it disappear.

Bottom line....I'm scared if I lose my looks, I have nothing else going for me and no one will love me and I will be irrelevant.

Please forgive me for this post. ---Carrie

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Beauty comes from the inside out the heart of woman. The heart of a Godly woman is more precious than fine gems.

JPPT1974 said:

To me thirty is the new 20!

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Is it really?

Ronit said:

Remember Men tend to be Visual creatures, so it's natural for them.
Sorry for the generalizations brothers

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There is a difference between desirability and aesthetic preferences. She's speaking of the latter and its usually communicated early in the relationship. I've dated men like that.

My partners were very attentive and invested in my upkeep. That runs the gamut from skincare to diet. Some men enjoy dressing their lady. In his mind I'm an extension of him. A visual looking glass. When people encounter me they learn a lot about him in the process.

This appeals to my nature and I enjoy serving him in this manner. But that measure of influence could be difficult for some. It shouldn't incite fear or concerns of being replaced. It's a position of honor. You're his prize. That's the mature approach.

The opposite is someone who wants a face, body, or fountain of youth. He'll trade you in for another without shame.

~Bella

LaBèlla said:

There is a difference between desirability and aesthetic preferences. She's speaking of the latter and its usually communicated early in the relationship. I've dated men like that.

My partners were very attentive and invested in my upkeep. That runs the gamut from skincare to diet. Some men enjoy dressing their lady. In his mind I'm an extension of him. A visual looking glass. When people encounter me they learn a lot about him in the process.

This appeals to my nature and I enjoy serving him in this manner. But that measure of influence could be difficult for some. It shouldn't incite fear or concerns of being replaced. It's a position of honor. You're his prize. That's the mature approach.

The opposite is someone who wants a face, body, or fountain of youth. He'll trade you in for another without shame.

~Bella

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You know Bella. 10 years ago what you said would have really offended me. But the Lord's been working on me and now I am able to see the beauty and the intellect in your comment.

Ronit said:

You know Bella. 10 years ago what you said would have really offended me. But the Lord's been working on me and now I am able to see the beauty and the intellect in your comment.

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I used to speak extensively on the topic. But I was in different company. This isn't the right setting. I'm glad the Lord is working on your heart. I push myself a lot but my companion can make me soar.

~Bella

I at first didn't think it was a big deal. But after turning 30 it was like my life flashed before my eyes and I started questioning my life progress. I recently started focusing on gratitude which seems to have been the antidote to my seemingly existential crisis.

I honestly did not mind turning 30. I am 34 years old now and it just does not bother me. I view age as just a number.

As someone who has recently turned 30 a month or so ago, I will say the transition was somewhat difficult. Admittedly I do not really care anymore, aging is just a part of life. Growing older is something I think is a little easier for men than women. Honestly, I think men tend to look their best during the 27-34 age range. Ten years ago I looked like an undeveloped teenager, while not the most masculine looking man I do look more defined. I still have a nice full head of hair. While I do have to be more mindful with what I eat, I have since pretty much adapted to a new healthier diet. While I could draw up interest from women in the past, I seem to garner more attention the older I become. Partly due to looking more developed, and also to do with being more confident of myself and knowing how to better communicate with women.

While I think men tend to look gross around the age of 40, for some reason if they watch their diet and health I think many men go back up and look good in their 50s and even early 60s. It is not the same attraction as having more youthful features, but a different kind of physical attraction. I do not believe the "men age like fine wine" coping I see from men. Although I do believe men have a greater agency in aging better compared to women. If you can watch your calories and work out, most men can probably age gracefully. Rougher more mature skin is just not the same deteriorating quality for men. Hair loss is a problem mostly unique for men, although given my family history I do not think I have much to worry about on that front.

I do think though turning 40 compared to 50 is a harder road for men. We look more like an older young guy. While when we are 50 we just look like an older guy. Graceful or not, we're not caught in the between. Although fashion might play a role too.

One strange thing is that when I was 25 people thought I was older and looked more around 30, yet now when I am actually 30 people think I am around 25. Not sure I like this. I would rather look my age and just age gracefully here on out.

Feeling like I have to do something important, but in the end this has been always in my mind. But as I know myself, even if I did something ”important” I would brush it away and still feel that wasn’t important enough.. now I don’t take life as serious as then. Gladly.

I'm old...that's what I thought

Haven't reached that point yet, but looking forward to it. Despite being in my mid-twenties I'm still regularly mistaken for a fourteen year-old, so a bit of aging might do me some good.

...Maybe. We'll see when I get there lol.

Thinking about the fact that I now straddle 2 centuries, was a wake-up call. My twenties were blighted by various miseries, so I went to sleep at 18 and kind of woke up as a 30 year old. My 20's were a bit of a fever dream. I shambled through them, and managed to eke out some success by God's grace.

There is , apparently, an unbridgeable gulf between 30 and 20. Recently, I've started to see it, but I don't envy the younger generations especially. Their world seems to be so vapid and shrink wrapped. Authenticity is a trending topic now. It has a hashtag and a stock market value. I suppose it always did, but it seems like a process which is accelerating.

i grew up huddling over a radio set trying to catch my favourite tunes on UK radio. I learned to value and really treasure information. It wasn't a valuable commodity, it was actually an experience. Libraries, perpetually dodgy dial-up, television stations and zines. Pop culture felt really saturated with meaning, where today, it seems a little dessicated and dried out.

Part of it was the physicality of everything. All of the above things are bodily experience, where culture today is increasingly disembodied. The information highways are practically inside our skulls at this stage.

Meh maybe I'm just old

I just wished things were different.

rambot said:

When I was in high school (even in uni) I DREADED turning 30.
Thirty was that time when the "party was over" and when "life has to start". It was time (at the LATEST) to start having kids and buying a house.
All those "boring" things.

It made the month or so before my birthday kinda stressful for me. I was just dreading it as I had been dreading it in high school. Luckily, due to my "partying holiday lifestyle" I landed myself in some hot water and I had other stresses to thinkabout and my birthday became a distant thought.

After I turned thirty, I didn't really care. I still don't care that I'm 30 (about 5 months in).


how about you?

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You must be around 45 now then?

Are you old enough yet to move to the remote Yukon, grow a long grey beard, live in a log cabin and tell tales of terror to passing hikers?

I found 30 depressing, but I am looking forward to 40.

rambot said:

When I was in high school (even in uni) I DREADED turning 30.
Thirty was that time when the "party was over" and when "life has to start". It was time (at the LATEST) to start having kids and buying a house.
All those "boring" things.

It made the month or so before my birthday kinda stressful for me. I was just dreading it as I had been dreading it in high school. Luckily, due to my "partying holiday lifestyle" I landed myself in some hot water and I had other stresses to thinkabout and my birthday became a distant thought.

After I turned thirty, I didn't really care. I still don't care that I'm 30 (about 5 months in).


how about you?

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"Today I yam a man!"

It was one of my best years. I had been a lonely single parent for several years, but I had just recently met my current wife, and she'd set up one of my best birthday parties...the only one I even remember.

30, that was awhile ago...hah! I never minded much. I always wanted to be older than what I was.

I'm actually at the best point in life now that I can remember aside from my happy early childhood years. Most of the American nation is falling apart, but I'm content, happy, and doing much better than I was in the 2010s when I was socially immature. My 36th year was a big improvement, and life has only gotten better since having my little one. I'm looking forward to 40. I don't miss my twenties at all, except for the better athletic performance and healthier knees and feet