fear of apostasy and falling into sin

Blaise N said:

Hi CF,

To start, yesterday I finally think I’ve been saved!,it was one of the most calming moments in my life, and to all of those who prayed for me and supported me in my worst times! After reading something g from Mrs Oliver Greene, who if you don’t know who that is, she is the wife of Baptist pastor Oliver B Greene.And I’ve realized I’ve tried to please God by excessive work and by anxiety, and all I had to do was receive him by faith.But ever since last night I’ve had excessive anxiety about something branched off of faith.Basically I’ve had some mental confusion,and now that I finally have the assurance of my salvation,I’m confused on what to do next,and I’m terrified of falling into apostasy,and my desires are mixing and being confusing(I want to please God but my mind makes me feel like I truly don’t).However I’m afraid I’ll fall back into sin,I’m afraid of falling into apostasy.I’m afraid of not having anxiety(I recently had some medication increased and it’s de-escalated my anxiety majorly),many people may wonder why I worry about not having anxiety,it’s because I’m afraid if I don’t worry then it makes me feel like I don’t care.

I’m just going through a confusing time,and need some prayer support.Could anyone help,please?

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Your security of salvation is not a feeling. If indeed God has saved you, he will complete what he has begun. But notice: HE will complete it.

But your life is not about you, but about Christ. Pursue Christ with all you are, and when you see how weak you are, recognize that God is not surprised nor was he fooled, nor will he give up. You are always precisely where he knew you would be. So continue. You are wasting energy on fear. This is God's work!

Our Father understands about mental issues. But always remember we all fall short and he is always there with open arms upon true repentance.

You must let go of fear completely, are you able in your personal life to allow yourself to not fear without hurting others? Can you allow yourself to do you for some time, to find strength? If you feel you fail, that is the devil calling you, do not listen, cast doubt in you. You have to much now, ask your husband to take care of the familyoperation, while you work on your relationship to God and do it fully and truthful, full focus. And you seek strength in your family, but do not let them drain you, because you fight for you, to be a better person for them the rest of your life. And you have been told, this is your time to find God fully.

Leave desires for now, it is a spice of life that both God and the devil may use as a tool. Your desire is now to find yourself, and allow yourself to find God, all the rest, you will find strength to supress. If it is God. I cannot give advice on medical issue, but you sound like a person who feel expections, and not fulfilling them, and that gives you anxiety. Just ask them if that is true, bet it is not. Ask the people in life if it is so before taking drugs, what if you are wrong? Good luck, hope it works out for you.

Blaise N said:

Hi CF,

To start, yesterday I finally think I’ve been saved!,it was one of the most calming moments in my life, and to all of those who prayed for me and supported me in my worst times! After reading something g from Mrs Oliver Greene, who if you don’t know who that is, she is the wife of Baptist pastor Oliver B Greene.And I’ve realized I’ve tried to please God by excessive work and by anxiety, and all I had to do was receive him by faith.But ever since last night I’ve had excessive anxiety about something branched off of faith.Basically I’ve had some mental confusion,and now that I finally have the assurance of my salvation,I’m confused on what to do next,and I’m terrified of falling into apostasy,and my desires are mixing and being confusing(I want to please God but my mind makes me feel like I truly don’t).However I’m afraid I’ll fall back into sin,I’m afraid of falling into apostasy.I’m afraid of not having anxiety(I recently had some medication increased and it’s de-escalated my anxiety majorly),many people may wonder why I worry about not having anxiety,it’s because I’m afraid if I don’t worry then it makes me feel like I don’t care.

I’m just going through a confusing time,and need some prayer support.Could anyone help,please?

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This is the simple answer...read Gods word daily, set a time aside for prayer, and attend worship services.

When ready, ask to be baptised, partake at the lords table and try to live out your faith as best you can.

Always remember though, that salvation is by Gods grace, for Christ sake through faith...+nothing, if you believe this, and sincerely trust in Gods promises to save you, then you are secure in your salvation.

It may also help to find some Christian friends to hang out with.

You will face trials for your faith, friends and family may shun you, co-workers may laugh at you, and it could get worse.

Find a way to spread the gospel, I would keep this simple as well, and remember you will never have all the answers. Always support your church as God has prospered you.

Apostasy is a choice, a deliberate act of rebellion against God...stay in Gods word and you will be fine.

"I’m afraid I’ll fall back into sin,I’m afraid of falling into apostasy.I’m afraid of not having anxiety(I recently had some medication increased and it’s de-escalated my anxiety majorly),many people may wonder why I worry about not having anxiety,it’s because I’m afraid if I don’t worry then it makes me feel like I don’t care."

What mattes is what did GOD say? He said to you I have not given you the spirit of fear but of power and love and a sound mind. He said you are in my hands.. your not going anywhere. He said what I started in you I will finish!

So take those thoughts which are not from God and FLIP THEM! Well the enemy said them.. he can only LIE!

This verse came to mind.. oh I love this verse. It is for YOU! "Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness"

So this is why we walk by faith. Faith in what GOD said not what we see hear or feel. Feelings are up and down all over the place. So when fear pops up you say NO! God has not given me the spirit of fear but of power love and a sound mine. I have the JOY of the lord.. I am strong in the power of HIS Might.

See its a choice. Sin has no more hold on you. IF you fall ...get up dust off keep going. Confess our sins.. for He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleans us from ALL unrighteousness. You are because you believe in Jesus..in right standing with GOD. RIGHTEOUSNESS! Not what YOU DID OR DO! Its because of JESUS. God is faithful to what JESUS did. So rejoice! You don't have troubles problems.. FACT all you need is faith in GOD..what HE said. For faith comes by hearing hearing by the word of God. Stay in that word.

Blaise N said:

finally have the assurance of my salvation,I’m confused on what to do next,and I’m terrified of falling into apostasy,and my desires are mixing and being confusing(I want to please God but my mind makes me feel like I truly don’t).However I’m afraid I’ll fall back into sin

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Two basic facts about Christianity.
1/. We do not keep ourselves in the faith.
Faith is a gift from God and it is he who keeps us in the faith.

2/. We are sinners. That means we will sin, in fact 1 John 1:9 goes so far to say that those who claim not to sin are not Christian.

So what do you do?
Basically carry on doing what ever you where doing, but with one major difference.
You are not trying to earn anything, but are doing what you do out of love for Jesus.

Blaise N said:

Hi CF,

To start, yesterday I finally think I’ve been saved!,it was one of the most calming moments in my life, and to all of those who prayed for me and supported me in my worst times! After reading something g from Mrs Oliver Greene, who if you don’t know who that is, she is the wife of Baptist pastor Oliver B Greene.And I’ve realized I’ve tried to please God by excessive work and by anxiety, and all I had to do was receive him by faith.But ever since last night I’ve had excessive anxiety about something branched off of faith.Basically I’ve had some mental confusion,and now that I finally have the assurance of my salvation,I’m confused on what to do next,and I’m terrified of falling into apostasy,and my desires are mixing and being confusing(I want to please God but my mind makes me feel like I truly don’t).However I’m afraid I’ll fall back into sin,I’m afraid of falling into apostasy.I’m afraid of not having anxiety(I recently had some medication increased and it’s de-escalated my anxiety majorly),many people may wonder why I worry about not having anxiety,it’s because I’m afraid if I don’t worry then it makes me feel like I don’t care.

I’m just going through a confusing time,and need some prayer support.Could anyone help,please?

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Thank you for sharing your struggle. May I ask, what makes you think you were not saved before? Is this the first time you had accepted Jesus Christ as your Savior?

Also, it sounds like you are tormented by a lot of obsessive and anxious thoughts. Have you been diagnosed with OCD, or do you think you might have it?

Blaise N said:

Yes I have been diagnosed with ocd as afar as I know,I take medication for it.

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I see. I'm glad you're getting some help for it, anyway. Your fears sound very typical of OCD. Fear of not accepting Christ "correctly," fear of apostasy/falling away, and anxiety about not being anxious are all VERY typical for Christians with OCD. Have you gotten therapy and/or learned mental strategies for dealing with your obsessions?

Blaise N said:

fear of apostasy and falling into sin...?

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It doesn't sound like you are afraid enough to seek real help, yet.

Blaise N said:

not yet,I’ve been trying to write important notes down to keep in my pocket for anxiety attacks

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OK. I highly recommend getting help, even if that means nothing more than learning the correct strategies for dealing with OCD/anxiety and applying them. However, I think a lot of people find that they benefit from having a therapist help them do this. For OCD, you'd definitely want an OCD specialist or someone who knows how to use CBT/ERP therapies to treat OCD. There are also a lot of good online resources. I'm part of a good support group on Facebook, and I feel like you might find it helpful. If you want to join, here's the link: Facebook Groups. And here's one of my favorite websites about scrupulosity/religious OCD: OCD & CHRISTIANITY – CHRISTIANITY. Let me know if you want any more links/resources!

Hi,
Just want to say I can completely relate to the inner turmoil you face. Please understand your struggles ate not unique but they are 2 fold. One is the spiritual component and the other is the psychological.

I will say please pay attention to Mari17 - she has a lot of great insight on ocd and how it impacts our faith. others have alos posted some really helpful thoughts. Our sins do gi e the devil a foothold BUT like someone else mentioned - It IS God who will complete the work in you. We don't need to let the turmoil in our head determine our standing with Christ.

I had greatly struggled with this over the past few months. My ocd and continued sin had made me feel completely unsaveable. Even recently I went through another bout of falling, obsessing, Satanic accusations and ruminations about my past actions but God saw me through it and he will see you through it as well.

Be encouraged, get the help you need but always remember - He will never leave you or forsake you.

Blaise N said:

Hi CF,

To start, yesterday I finally think I’ve been saved!,it was one of the most calming moments in my life, and to all of those who prayed for me and supported me in my worst times! After reading something g from Mrs Oliver Greene, who if you don’t know who that is, she is the wife of Baptist pastor Oliver B Greene.And I’ve realized I’ve tried to please God by excessive work and by anxiety, and all I had to do was receive him by faith.But ever since last night I’ve had excessive anxiety about something branched off of faith.Basically I’ve had some mental confusion,and now that I finally have the assurance of my salvation,I’m confused on what to do next,and I’m terrified of falling into apostasy,and my desires are mixing and being confusing(I want to please God but my mind makes me feel like I truly don’t).However I’m afraid I’ll fall back into sin,I’m afraid of falling into apostasy.I’m afraid of not having anxiety(I recently had some medication increased and it’s de-escalated my anxiety majorly),many people may wonder why I worry about not having anxiety,it’s because I’m afraid if I don’t worry then it makes me feel like I don’t care.

I’m just going through a confusing time,and need some prayer support.Could anyone help,please?

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Sounds like anxiety and that you received some relief due to prayer.

Philippians 4:4-8 talks about the peace that surpasses understanding. This is really relevant for anxiety since the loss of peace is because of how you understand, and how you process emotions.

The continuum of the kingdom of God is outside of the fleshly realm of thoughts and emotions, and being removed from the body of death for a while feels good. However, the anxiety and the connected mindset needs to be replaced with Trust in God over time for the change to be lasting.

Blaise N said:

Hi CF,

To start, yesterday I finally think I’ve been saved!,it was one of the most calming moments in my life, and to all of those who prayed for me and supported me in my worst times! After reading something g from Mrs Oliver Greene, who if you don’t know who that is, she is the wife of Baptist pastor Oliver B Greene.And I’ve realized I’ve tried to please God by excessive work and by anxiety, and all I had to do was receive him by faith.But ever since last night I’ve had excessive anxiety about something branched off of faith.Basically I’ve had some mental confusion,and now that I finally have the assurance of my salvation,I’m confused on what to do next,and I’m terrified of falling into apostasy,and my desires are mixing and being confusing(I want to please God but my mind makes me feel like I truly don’t).However I’m afraid I’ll fall back into sin,I’m afraid of falling into apostasy.I’m afraid of not having anxiety(I recently had some medication increased and it’s de-escalated my anxiety majorly),many people may wonder why I worry about not having anxiety,it’s because I’m afraid if I don’t worry then it makes me feel like I don’t care.

I’m just going through a confusing time,and need some prayer support.Could anyone help,please?

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I suffer from OCD and was recently baptized. What you described is exactly what I have been going through. It was as if you had written the words directly from my mind. We also have almost exactly the same name, which is what makes this a bit eerie.

I believe God wants me to offer you what help I can, so I'd like to give you some advice and assurance.

One should not worry about tomorrow. Worry of the future is something used by satan to attack you. Remember what Jesus said:

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."


In C.S. Lewis's book "The Screwtape Letters", he talks about how fear of the future is used by satan to attack us in the present. I'd recommend listening to the whole audiobook, as I find it particularly illuminating, But here are the two chapters I know on this particular subject.



Also, Just for context, and so you're not confused, this story is written from the perspective of a demon trying to tempt souls away from God. So that's why God is referred to by the narrator as "the enemy".

One point that is particularly noteworthy is how your worries for the future will give you visions of potential horrible things that you think could happen, which will torment you despite the fact these visions are purely hypothetical, and often contradictory.

In this particular case, it's the fear that you'll fall into apostasy. I've been having this fear on and off recently myself. However, when you realize this present worry about the future is a trick meant to fool you, much of the power it holds over you goes away.

Simply focus on the current day and it's struggles as your appointed cross to bear.

Do not ask yourself "What if I commit apostasy in the future?", because you cannot affect the future from the present by worrying about it.

Remember Matthew 6:27. "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?"

Instead, simply ask yourself "What can I do today that is virtuous and good in the eyes of God?", and seek to do the best you can in that regard. Do you think God would want you to be crushed by fear of potential futures which may or may not occur? Or do you think God would rather you spent that energy doing something productive?

God controls the future, not us. So, the best we can do is to stay faithful and try to do good in the present.

I wish you the best my friend, and I will be praying for you.

May God be with you.