- Dec 13, 2015
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So let's just say I was introduced to the idea of PTSD the other day. I had another typical crappy day and instead of posting on here and bothering people I decided to post on a Schizophrenic forum and talked to other people suffering from the same illness I had. They were lets just say, very welcoming and I was able to tell them my problems and a lot of them identified with me. I started talking about my dad and all of the trauma I've had for almost my entire life. I guess from the way I was posting and the more I described what happened to me the more they suggested that I probably have PTSD. So for the heck of it, I tried taking the ACE test and many PTSD tests and it's turns out, I have a really high ace score and many tests say I should talk to a doctor about it. Well, it's Saturday so I can't even remotely start to schedule an appointment until Monday and my Psychiatrist is weeks away. I don't think I can lost that long. I keep having what I now understand as flashbacks and I can't forget or stop thinking about my lifetime trauma. I think high odds are, that I do have PTSD and have had it since I was a child and never knew. Why? Idk, I've talked about my past far too much on this forum. I've talked about it enough this week, and honestly I wish I could just forget about it and suppress it like I did with most of my childhood trauma. I wish it would just go away and I could get over it, forgive my wife and dad and move on. But, it doesn't work that way. I'm terrified, I've had unexplainable headaches and random pain everywhere that I just couldn't explain until now.
When I was a kid I thought I faked a seizure but, I probably really did have one. Not about my neighbor like I thought but about my dad. Anyway, I regret making so many topics here and sharing all this with you so ill make it quick. Help pray with me that I can recover and heal from this. That I don't suffer so much everyday and so that I can start feeling God's love instead of being terrified if him. And if I do have PTSD I want God to help me through that and for him to help find a doctor like asap and hopefully I can get the right treatment.. Please. Sorry this was so long and sorry for posting again.
When I was a kid I thought I faked a seizure but, I probably really did have one. Not about my neighbor like I thought but about my dad. Anyway, I regret making so many topics here and sharing all this with you so ill make it quick. Help pray with me that I can recover and heal from this. That I don't suffer so much everyday and so that I can start feeling God's love instead of being terrified if him. And if I do have PTSD I want God to help me through that and for him to help find a doctor like asap and hopefully I can get the right treatment.. Please. Sorry this was so long and sorry for posting again.
