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Here's chapter 2 of the rough draft. While this one does have some good descriptions and a sense of danger, I think that maybe the chase scene could have been longer. Also not sure if the villain should reveal himself so soon.

When Bomberman woke, the first thing he noticed was that he could hardly move at all. When his eyes started to adjust to the light, he could see the reason why – he was trapped in a glass capsule with multiple wires attached to his body. The thick fog remained around the capsule, partially obscuring the objects outside; Bomberman could just make out the forms of some of them. The other ends of the wires were connected to a group of machinery, which emitted faint colorful lights and buzzing and beeping sounds. On the other side of the room, the two mysterious figures were sitting by a computer.

Bomberman had no idea what this was all about, but he didn’t want to be a part of it. He had to escape somehow! Still, he knew it would be too risky to attempt an escape while the two strangers were present. He closed his eyes so they wouldn’t know he was awake and listened carefully to hear what they were saying. “Quite an interesting specimen,” one of them said, “possessing impressive powers unlike those of this planet’s native life forms.”

“His abilities will surely be helpful to our boss,” the other stranger replied, “Shall we give him the data now?”

Bomberman heard footsteps and the sound of a door opening. He opened his eyes. There was still a cloud of mist in the room, but he was all alone now. Now’s my chance! he thought, I’ve got to get out of here! He looked down at the wires that practically held him still. But how do I deal with these wiry things without hurting myself? Maybe if I use a Wind Bomb?

A light green bomb with propellers on top appeared in Bomberman’s right hand. When he dropped the Wind Bomb, it exploded into a gust of wind that did not harm its user but blew the wire off his right arm. Bomberman used his now free arm to remove the wire from his left arm and then proceeded to remove the rest of them. He stepped back and threw a bomb at the wall of the capsule that trapped him, breaking the glass and creating a large hole in its front. As tempted as he was to take a closer look at the machinery in the room, Bomberman knew he should leave before the two mysterious figures came back, so he ran out of the capsule and out the door.

Outside of the room, Bomberman found himself back in the long metallic halls of the control center. But he had no time to search for the exit, for an alarm went off as soon as he stepped into the hall. “Alert! Alert! A captive is escaping! Locate and recapture the captive!” a mechanical voice sounded as the rooms were bathed in a red light.

There was no time to waste. Bomberman kept on running, watching out for any obstacles that might appear. A few cameras on the walls fired lasers, but he avoided them. “You! You won’t get away!” a familiar voice said. The two shadowy figures came out from one room, no longer cloaked in fog. Now they were clearly visible as purple alien-like creatures with black eyes, a type of creature Bomberman had never encountered before. They tried to catch him by tackling him, but he jumped out of the way, causing the two enemies to crash into each other. To prevent them from continuing to chase him, Bomberman threw a bomb at the ground behind himself before turning at the nearest corner. The blast blocked the strangers’ vision long enough to allow him to escape.

Strangely, as soon as Bomberman entered the room he had now arrived at, everything became quiet and calm; the alarm ceased and the red light faded. After making sure that no more signs of danger were around, the hero took this time to stop and catch his breath. He waited for his heart to stop pounding before checking out his surroundings. And when he did, he found that he was in a room of greater size than the one he’d been trapped in. Most of its contents were machines, with a huge computer screen in the center surrounded by flashing lights.

An evil laugh suddenly rang out inside the room, and Bomberman stepped back in surprise when a dark figure appeared in front of him. This strange character looked like the two purple aliens that had captured Bomberman, except he wore a dark purple wizard’s hat and cape and had piercing yellow eyes. He was surrounded by a dark aura and seemed to float in midair. “So you’ve managed to get here, Bomberman,” he said, “It is just as I expected.”

“How do you know my name?!” Bomberman demanded, “Just who are you, anyway?!”

“Ahahaha! When you’re famous as a hero all over the galaxy, everyone knows your name! Allow me to introduce myself…I am called the Mecha Mage, the Master of Mechanics. My robotic creations far surpass all others! As for you, Bomberman…I could easily finish you off here and now, but now is not the time for that. I’ve already got what I needed from you, so I’ll be sending you on your way.”

Surprised, Bomberman hurriedly searched for the items he’d brought along. All of his power-ups were still there. So was his lunch, even if it was somewhat smashed from being carried around so long. Mecha Mage smirked. “We have not taken any of your equipment. We have no use for such silly things. Rather, we have taken something from you that is always with you in every moment. Perhaps you shall find out, in due time.”

Bomberman took another step back, confounded by these words. “W-what are you talking about? Hey!” he shouted when he was suddenly lifted into the air and transported out of the room by Mecha Mage.

Mecha Mage and the two aliens were made by me.

Chapter 3. It's very long because I kept forgetting to start chapter 4.


The next thing the white Bomber knew, he was standing outside the control center again. He looked back and forth, finding that he was alone. He was still trying to make sense of everything he’d just experienced when he received a message from Prof. Ein. “What happened in the control center, Bomberman? Did you find any information on Bautnaut’s situation?”

“You’ll never believe what happened in there, Professor,” Bomberman replied, “I’m still trying to understand it myself. There were two purple monsters that somehow knocked me out without attacking. When I woke up I was in a capsule like some kind of experiment. I escaped using my bombs and ran into this guy who called himself the Mecha Mage. He told me that he took something from me that’s always with me and not part of my equipment, and then he teleported me out here!”

“Oh dear…it sounds like these enemies are even stronger than I thought. I’m just glad you got out of there safely.”

Bomberman shook his head worriedly. “I’ve got a bad feeling about this whole thing. What could Mecha Mage have possibly taken from me? And what could he be planning to do with it?”

“I’m afraid even I don’t know the answers right now, but I’ll do everything I can to learn more. In the meantime…” A map of the areas surrounding Bomberman’s location reflected from his wristband, with a mountain to the north flashing. “It’s probably best if we wait until we know more to take on the control center again,” Prof. Ein continued, “At the moment I’m picking up an odd signal from Mirror Mountain to the north. Why don’t you try investigating that first?”

Bomberman nodded and gazed up into the distance. He could see a dark building on top of a tall mountain. Mirror Mountain, huh? he thought, Sounds interesting! And so he set off.

The closer Bomberman came to Mirror Mountain, the more mechanized the landscape appeared, with patches of silver metal all around. When he arrived at the mountain, he looked up toward its peak. It was so tall and steep that Bomberman knew it would be too difficult to climb up. “This must be the place, but how do I get to the top of such a steep slope? Another Wind Bomb, maybe?”

Bomberman took out another Wind Bomb, turned it into a Big Bomb, and set it down in front of himself. “Well, here goes nothing!” He stepped on top of the bomb and BOOM! It exploded into a huge gust of wind that blew its user straight up the mountain and above the building on top. When he started to fall, Bomberman grabbed onto the edge of the roof and held on. “Wow! Talk about being blown away!” He carefully lowered himself first to the top of the nearest window, then to the bottom, and finally to the ground.

Bomberman moved to the front door and surveyed the building in front of him; it appeared dark and abandoned. I wonder why this is called Mirror Mountain, he thought, It looks more like Creepy Mansion Mountain. He sighed. But I won’t find any answers just standing here. I’d better get going. Cautiously, he opened the door and stepped inside. He noticed that the inside of the mansion was dark just like the outside, with the sunlight shining through the windows being the only light source. A sign on the wall near the door read:

Mirror Mansion – Home of Sir Reflector, the Mirror Master – Be Amazed By His Mirrors!

I guess Sir Reflector isn’t home, Bomberman thought, seeing that the place was very still and quiet. Unaware that a mysterious figure was watching him from the shadows, he moved on to the next room – and found that it was filled with all sorts of mirrors. Each mirror was a different shape or size from the others and lined up neatly against the walls.

Bomberman stood in front of each mirror, one at a time, and studied his reflection in each one. One of them made him appear short and chubby, another tall and thin, and yet another lent a wavy appearance to his form. “Check it out! These mirrors are amazing, all right!” the hero was amused by all the different reflections. He even found one that was larger at the top and smaller at the bottom. “Now that’s what I call carrying a lot of weight on my shoulders – or perhaps letting it go to my head!”

Bomberman laughed at his own joke as he continued to view the amusing reflections…until he spotted the last mirror on the wall, where he stopped short. In it, his image showed no change in size or proportion…but it possessed an odd robotic appearance! It was shiny and metallic all over, with two red lights for eyes on a dark screen-like face. It also possessed round bits of metal on its belly, wrists, ankles, the sides of its head, and the “antenna” on its head. It even copied Bomberman’s every move, to his surprise. When he blinked his eyes, so did the reflection. He waved his arm in front of the mirror, and the reflection did too. It took a step back at the same time he did.

Bomberman stared at the mirror worriedly. Either there’s something wrong with this mirror or there’s something wrong with me, he thought, I’m not going to stick around and find out! He made a dash for the next room, but he wasn’t watching where he was going and he crashed into something hard. After falling to a sitting position on the floor, he looked up to see what he had run into. There, standing in the middle of the room, a tall and thin older man wearing a top hat and cape was encased in a metallic coating. A frightened expression showed on his face, but he was totally immobile.

Bomberman’s initial reaction was of shock. He backed away quickly and immediately showed Prof. Ein what he had just found. “Prof. Ein! I think I’ve just found one of Bautnaut’s frozen inhabitants!”

“Indeed you have,” the professor replied solemnly, “I’m afraid you’ll find plenty of people trapped in metal just like that on your journey.”

Having regained his composure, Bomberman stood up, moved behind the frozen man, and tapped on the hard and cold casing entrapping him. “This must be Sir Reflector, the Mirror Master who’s supposed to live in Mirror Mansion. Only he looks more like the Statue Master now…how do I unfreeze him?” The Bomber pondered this.

“You’ll likely have to defeat the one behind all this – presumably the Mecha Mage – to do that,” Prof. Ein became strangely quiet for a moment after saying this, and then he spoke again. “Um, Bomberman, the odd signal I told you about earlier…it’s right behind you!” At that moment Bomberman became aware of an unusual warmth behind him. He turned around and was startled to find that a line of flames was coming right at him! Thinking quickly, he used a blue Aqua Bomb to douse the flames. As the smoke cleared, he heard a crash and caught a glimpse of something flying right through the ceiling.

“What was that? Someone – or something – is after me!” Bomberman exclaimed.

“Whatever it was, it’s the cause of the signal I’m picking up,” Prof. Ein answered, “It appears to have gone to a garden to the west of the foot of Mirror Mountain.” He used a map to show Bomberman the location again.

Bomberman turned back to the frozen man. “Sorry sir, we’ll have to help you and your house a little later,” he said before running to the front door, “Right now I have to do something about that signal!”

Once Bomberman was out of Mirror Mansion, he had yet another challenge to face. “Now, how do I get down from here without killing myself?” he wondered, viewing the long drop to the foot of the mountain. Wind Bombs were his best bet once again, he guessed. He took out a Wind Bomb, took a deep breath, and jumped from the top of the mountain. He tossed the Wind Bomb at the ground below and it exploded upon landing, sending a gust of wind upward. The blast briefly halted its user’s fall when he was a few feet from the ground, allowing him to land softly in a pile of pink petals.

Bomberman popped out from the pile and shook off a few petals that remained on his head. “Whew! It’s a good thing I had quick thinking and a soft landing!” He got up and took in his surroundings. Even though Prof. Ein had said the place was a garden, it didn’t look much like one – all the flowers in the numerous flowerbeds were frozen just like Sir Reflector. Tall trees growing around the flowerbeds were in bloom with pretty pink blossoms; petals fell from them, drifted gently to the ground, and landed in piles. The trees themselves, however, were covered in metallic patches.

“Cheery Cherry Blossom Garden,” Bomberman read from a sign nearby, and he sighed, “It doesn’t look very cheery. It looks sad and lonely, just like every other place on Bautnaut.” He started to explore the place glumly but was soon swept off his feet by a sudden strong wind. He grabbed onto the nearest tree to keep from being blown away until the gust calmed. Bomberman dropped to the ground, the area now as quiet as before. Where did that come from? he thought, perplexed by the abrupt weather change.

Chapter 4. A friend coming to help Bomberman makes things a bit more interesting.


At that moment, something zipped by overhead. When it slowly landed in front of Bomberman, he couldn’t believe his eyes – it was exactly what he had seen in the odd mirror at Mirror Mansion! “P-Prof. Ein! My reflection! It’s r-real!” he stammered.

“What are you talking about, Bomberman?” Prof. Ein asked, “Wait a minute, the signal! It’s right in front of you!”

“You mean the signal is coming from what I saw in one of the mirrors at Mirror Mansion – THAT?” Bomberman showed Prof. Ein the strange figure.

The professor seemed just as amazed as Bomberman. “Why, that appears to be a robot built in your likeness!”

“I can see that, but how did it manage to appear in my reflection? Where did it come from? Do you have any information on it?”

Prof. Ein began working on a computer. “First, that I don’t know. Second, I’d guess this robot is the work of Mecha Mage. Third, from the data I can analyze so far, it appears to possess the same abilities as you! Only the bombs it can create have a blast power and radius approximately four times greater!”

“What am I supposed to do about that?!” Bomberman exclaimed, bewildered.

“Run?” Prof. Ein suggested, having no other ideas.

The strange robot took out a bomb, which looked like Bomberman’s but with a mechanical appearance. “Good idea!” Bomberman replied. He took off through the garden, running as fast as he could to avoid a line of flames that burst from the bomb. He hadn’t gone far when the robot used a Wind Bomb, which created another powerful gust. Bomberman was swept off the ground again; frantically, he reached out and held on to the nearest tree branch.

Once the gale subsided, the hero climbed down the tree and kept running. He jumped over a huge spiky patch of ice from an Ice Bomb and then hid behind a tree. Watching for any sign of the robot, he soon noticed that it had lost track of him. It was walking around in the distance, searching for him. He knew that now was his chance to hide, so he dove into a pile of petals on the ground.

Bomberman couldn’t see anything from his hiding place, but he remained still and listened carefully. At first, all was quiet. Mechanical sounds and rustling could be heard as the robot approached, grew louder when it walked by, and faded once it was leaving. The area became so quiet that Bomberman heard only his own breathing. He waited a little longer before cautiously lifting his head out of the petals to check if the coast was clear. Thankfully the robot was nowhere in sight.

Bomberman sighed in relief. That was a close one! he thought. He got up and looked at the cherry blossoms gently swaying in the breeze with a hint of sadness. “This place would be beautiful if only it wasn’t mechanized. How do I get out of here, anyway?” With the large size of the garden and the similarity of its features, it was impossible to tell where it ended. Bomberman didn’t have to worry about getting out for long, though, for another strong wind struck at that moment. “Not again!” he shouted. This time the closest trees were just out of reach, so he was blown right out of the garden.

Bomberman went flying over the trees, into the sky, and finally landed on his belly in a spacious field. “Oof!” he pulled himself up and rubbed his sore left side, “I wouldn’t recommend it, but that’s one way to get out. Where am I now?”

As if answering his question, Prof. Ein chimed in. “It looks like something is going on at the Lightning Tower, located on a hill to the north,” he shared its location, which was not far away, “I’m picking up some strong signals from there. By the way, did you perhaps leave your Charaboxes in the Bomber Craft? It seems to be moving…”

Bomberman rummaged through his items. Indeed, he had left his Charaboxes behind. He knew he had locked up his ship, so no one could have gotten in. There was only one explanation for the spacecraft’s movement. “Oh no…” the Bomber murmured, and then he heard a loud noise from above him. When he looked up, it was exactly as he had suspected. The Bomber Craft was swiftly approaching from way up in the sky, piloted by a small, round, and pink Charabom.

“Myu myu!” Pommy said cheerfully, clearly enjoying the ride.

“Pommy! I told you not to take over the Bomber Craft!” Bomberman yelled, “Do you even know how to fly that thing?!” With no answer from its new pilot, the craft simply zoomed by before performing back-flips and spinning in the air. “I’ll take that as a no. Come back here!” Bomberman tried to chase after the Bomber Craft, but it was much too fast for him. So he stood there and watched it dance through the air until Pommy got the thrill of being a pilot out of his system. Finally the Charabom successfully, though unsteadily, landed near his friend.

Pommy opened the ship’s lid, still giggling with excitement. He didn’t even seem to care that Bomberman was walking toward him with his hands on his hips and a stern look on his face. “Out of all my Charaboms, only you would do such a thing,” he said crossly, “That was too dangerous, Pommy! You could have killed yourself and destroyed the Bomber Craft!”

Pommy immediately stopped giggling and looked down at the floor with the biggest, saddest, most sparkly eyes he could make. Bomberman knew deep down that Pommy’s intentions, as mischievous as they seemed sometimes, were usually good. “Okay, okay, I forgive you,” he said, softening his tone, “Just don’t do it again.” At this Pommy smiled and jumped into Bomberman’s arms, hugging him tightly. Bomberman couldn’t help but feel happy.

With his Charabom friend in one arm, Bomberman used his other arm to locate and pick up a sack containing his Charaboxes. “I know why you took control of the Bomber Craft now – you missed me, didn’t you? You didn’t want to be left behind!” he said as he tucked away the sack and closed up his ship, all his anger melted away, “I can’t believe I forgot about my Charaboxes like that! So how would you like to come along on the next stage of this adventure, Pommy?”

Pommy’s response was exactly as expected. His ears pricked up and he jumped to the ground. Then he hopped up and down saying “Myu myu!” excitedly.

“Great! Then onward we go!” Bomberman turned and gazed upward at a huge dark tower atop a hill in the distance. It was apparent by the electrical currents flashing around it that it was the Lightning Tower.

So, the robotic impostor that makes its debut in this chapter was not actually made by me as it was going to be in the cancelled game. However, nothing was revealed about it except for an illustration and that it was probably going to be an evil doppelganger of Bomberman (sounds a lot like Sonic and Metal Sonic, right?), so I had to make up its name and abilities and all that. Its name will be revealed in the next chapter, and its appearance may differ slightly from the illustration I mentioned as I was trying to memorize it! It will look a bit different in the rewrite.

I do not own Charaboms (Pommy is one of the official ones); they are Pokemon-like creatures that appear in a couple of Bomberman games. I did make Charaboxes, which are the equivalent of Pokeballs.

Chapter 5. I enjoyed writing this one!
Bomberman and Pommy traveled together to the hill. While they were walking, Bomberman told Pommy about everything he had experienced on Bautnaut so far (when he wasn’t busy chasing after the little creature, who simply had to investigate every patch of metal he saw in the grass), hoping that his other Charaboms were listening from within their Charaboxes. “And so, our goal is to do something about this Mecha Mage and that robotic impostor so we can unfreeze Bautnaut. The next place to explore is the Lightning Tower,” he concluded.

The two of them climbed up the hill until they were standing in front of the tower. It was so tall that they could not even see the top from where they stood. “Here we are,” Bomberman said. He cautiously pushed the door open and stepped inside with Pommy following. At the entrance they found themselves in a dark spacious room connected to a hallway; electric currents flowed up and down inside pipes on the walls, creating some light.

Bomberman felt a little uneasy about this atmosphere. “You’re an Electric-attribute, so all this electricity can’t hurt you much,” he told Pommy softly, “but I’m not so lucky. We’d better be careful or we might get the shock of our lives!” They quietly entered the hallway. There were two doors on each side of the hallway, but what really caught their attention was the room on the other end. Its main feature was a winding staircase that went up as far as the eye could see. “These stairs must lead to the top of the tower,” Bomberman said, “But they’re so long it’s almost dizzying. Do you think there’s an elevator?”

Pommy jumped and pointed to an elevator door on one wall. Bomberman ran over and pushed the button next to the door, but nothing happened. “It’s an elevator all right, but it’s not working. I think it needs to be activated somehow.” He noticed a small light above the door that flashed when the button was pressed but did not glow otherwise.

Pommy spotted a small opening in another wall that led to a tunnel – a vent. He was small enough to fit inside, and he had a good feeling that something useful may be on the other end. “Myu myu!” he said, pointing to the opening.

“You think you can find a way to activate the elevator if you go through that vent?” Bomberman asked. Pommy nodded. “Then go for it!” Bomberman encouraged. So Pommy scurried off into the vent. He ran through the tunnel until he came to the exit and peeked out. The coast was clear, so he came out of the tunnel and investigated the room it had led him to. It was a somewhat small space that appeared to be a kind of control center, with switches, buttons, and machinery at work inside.

Pommy saw a lever underneath a sign that read “Elevator”. He quickly ran over and pushed it, and then tiny green lights bordering the sign glowed. Thrilled to have been of help, the Charabom hurried excitedly back through the vent. He then found Bomberman waiting for him by the elevator door, which was open and the light above it glowing green. “Good job!” Bomberman praised, “Now we can use the elevator!” Pommy beamed proudly and followed him into the elevator.

Bomberman pressed the button for the top floor and the door closed. The elevator went up…up…and stopped abruptly. “Why did we stop?” Bomberman wondered worriedly, “We’re only about halfway to the top.” He pushed a button to open the door and carefully stepped out. “The elevator’s out again,” he sighed, observing the dim light above the door.

Pommy regained his balance after the sudden stop had knocked him down; he walked over to his friend pouting, upset that his helpful deed had somehow been undone. “Myuuu!” he whined, wanting answers. Who could have done such an awful thing?

Instead of getting answers, Pommy found Bomberman’s hand covering his mouth. “Shh! I thought I heard something!” Bomberman whispered. At that moment he caught sight of something moving out of the corner of his eye. He froze and slowly turned to face it.

Right in front of them stood a purple alien like the ones Bomberman had encountered at the control center, but he wore a yellow hat and cape. He was pointing a type of laser weapon at the heroes. “Don’t make a move or you’ll die!” he hissed.

Before anyone else could react, Pommy leapt at the alien and knocked the weapon out of his hand with surprising speed. In response, the enemy tackled both him and Bomberman, but their struggle did not last long before a voice shouted “Halt!”

The alien promptly scrambled to his feet. “Mecha Mage, sir!”

A familiar villain emerged from the shadows. “It is not your job to deal with this Bomberman,” he said plainly, “If you destroy him now, how will I watch my superior creation send him into utter defeat?”

“But-”

“Let it do the work. You have other things to take care of.” His minion reluctantly obeyed and walked away. Mecha Mage turned to Bomberman, who stood with Pommy hiding behind his legs. “Now then, Bomberman. How nice of you to come all the way here for a visit. I was just thinking about how I’d like to compare your inferior powers to those of my Mecha Bomber.”

Bomberman ignored the insults and got right to the point. “You’re the one who built that robotic impostor that’s been chasing me around, aren’t you? I bet you and your cronies are the ones behind this planet’s situation, too! But how-”

Mecha Mage laughed evilly. “How clever you are! However, I doubt that your mind could ever fathom my genius plans. As I said before, perhaps you shall find out in due time. Or maybe I will tell you later – if you survive long enough, that is! Get them, Mecha Bomber!”

The robot that Bomberman had faced in the cherry blossom garden flew out from the shadows. It tried to ram into Bomberman and Pommy, but the former ducked while the latter moved aside. Then it took out a yellow and black Thunder Bomb, and Bomberman’s mind raced. There was no telling how strong the bomb’s power was, and there was only one way to go. “Pommy, up the stairs!” he called out. He started to dash up the stairs with Pommy right behind him. But when the Thunder Bomb exploded, the sparks that flew from its blast rapidly caught up, even though Bomberman and Pommy ran as fast as they could. Apparently multiple bombs were being used.

Bomberman knew he had to get out – and quickly! He took Pommy in one arm, got out a Wind Bomb, and made it big. “Hang on, Pommy! We’re going for a ride!” he said, and he dropped the bomb right behind himself. When it was struck by a spark from below, it exploded and sent Bomberman and Pommy flying all the way to the top of the staircase; they landed on a balcony near the top of the tower. Bomberman set Pommy down and watched for any sign of Mecha Bomber, but all was quiet now.

Once he was sure that no one else was around, he looked down at Pommy. The Charabom looked up at him, his eyes wide with more excitement than fear. He had evidently enjoyed the flight to the balcony. “No, we can’t do it again,” his owner said softly, knowing Pommy well enough to guess what he wanted to say. Pommy was a little disappointed, for soaring to the top of a lofty tower in record time was not something he could do often.

Both of them gazed at the incredible view from the balcony. The main control center, Mirror Mountain, the Cheery Cherry Blossom Garden, and more places yet to be explored were all visible. Even though the sun had nearly set and Bautnaut’s moon was rising, there was still enough light to see the vast landscape. “You can practically see the entire planet from here!” Bomberman mused, “But once again, if only it wasn’t all mechanized…”

Before he had a chance to finish his sentence, Mecha Bomber suddenly burst onto the balcony with a Thunder Bomb in its hand. Bomberman stepped back, but there was nowhere to go; if he kept moving back he would fall from the balcony. “Mecha Bomber again! What do we do?!” he cried out, beginning to panic. The robot threw its bomb at two antennae on the very top of the tower, causing it to spark heavily. Suddenly there was electricity everywhere, flashing in the air like a fireworks display.

Bomberman stood frozen with terror when an electric blast came in his direction, but before it could strike, Pommy stepped in front of him. The little Charabom used his Defense against the electricity, creating a blue barrier that completely blocked it. Although he was an Electric-attribute and not much affected by electricity, a blast this huge was hard to control. “MYUUU!!” he screamed, keeping up the Defense with all his might until finally, the electricity exploded into small sparks and was gone.

Once again the area was calm, quiet, and visible. Mecha Bomber was already flying away, probably to avoid being caught in the blast itself. It was quite dark now because all of the electrical currents on the Lightning Tower had gone out. Pommy’s Defense broke with the final spark and he collapsed from exhaustion. Bomberman knelt beside him. “You saved my life, Pommy! Are you okay, buddy?” he said gently. Pommy looked tired, but he nodded. “You did a great job today. You should get some rest now.” Although Pommy enjoyed adventure he knew he needed to rest, so he obeyed and allowed Bomberman to return him to his Charabox.

Now that things had calmed down, Bomberman was beginning to feel sleepy. He yawned, his tension lifting as he looked at the starry night sky. Speaking of rest, I’d better get some myself. It’s getting late, he thought. He pushed a button on his wristband to summon his spacecraft. When it arrived he got in, landed it beneath a group of trees at the edge of the field below, and closed his eyes. Despite the trouble at hand, he was too weary from the day’s events to stay awake, and he soon was fast asleep.

Here's a drawing I made of four of the characters from my story. (BB does not appear in the rough draft, it will debut in the rewrite. Also, I changed Mecha Bomber and Mecha Mage's appearances a little.)

Chapter 6. Not sure about this one...I like the beginning and ending for the most part, but the middle might be sort of boring with all the dialogue.

The next thing Bomberman was aware of was the morning light shining on him. He rubbed his eyes and stretched a little as he sat up in his seat, still feeling somewhat tired. It was then that he heard a soft growl coming from inside him…and realized that his stomach was as empty as a ghost town and his throat as dry as a desert. When was the last time he’d had anything to eat or drink? “Good thing I brought my lunch – or should I call it breakfast?” Bomberman said to himself, opening his ship’s lid and taking out his brown paper bag.

Once Bomberman sat comfortably on the grass and started to eat, something moved inside his Charabox bag, which he had left in his ship overnight. A white light emerged from it and stopped in front of him; when it faded, in its place sat a furry light grey Charabom with long curvy ears. “Baglion!” Baglion greeted her owner with a sweet smile and a cheerful face.

“Good morning, Baglion,” Bomberman answered, not surprised in the least by her appearance. It was not unlike Pommy or Baglion to come out on their own and join him. “Do you want some breakfast? There should be a bag of Charabom food in the back of the Bomber Craft.” Baglion trotted over to where the Charabom food was, pulled it out, and took a few bites. Then she started to look inside the Bomber Craft again, which caught Bomberman’s attention. When he stood and walked over he found Baglion opening a compartment in the floor – and it was filled with bananas!

“Hey, where did this secret stash of bananas come from?” he paused for a moment, knowing the answer was obvious. “It was Pommy’s doing, wasn’t it?” Baglion giggled and took a banana from the bunch. Bomberman went back to his breakfast and sat down again. “You never know what he’ll do next!” he remarked, though he was more amused than anything. He gulped down a bottle of water while Baglion happily munched on her banana.

“I’m so thirsty I could drink an entire ocean!” Bomberman laughed, “Good thing I brought plenty of water bottles!” He got another water bottle out from his ship and gave it to Baglion. “I guess I was so focused on my journey that I forgot all about food and water. As Prof. Ein said when I was first training at the Bomber Base: ‘You have to take care of your own needs along with the needs of each mission.’”

Bomberman had a thought as Baglion and he finished breakfast. “Speaking of Prof. Ein, he’s been awfully quiet lately,” he said, and so he reached the professor. “Everything okay over there, professor?” he asked, “I haven’t heard from you since I was about to visit the Lightning Tower.”

“Oh yes, everything’s fine here,” Prof. Ein responded, “I’ve just been so busy with my research. Good work completing the Lightning Tower – and keeping Pommy under control. What did you see in there?”

Bomberman couldn’t help but chuckle at the part about keeping Pommy under control. “Oh, Pommy was a big help overall – I couldn’t have done it without him!” Then he grew more serious. “We encountered Mecha Mage and one of his minions in the Lightning Tower, along with that mechanical Bomberman, which is called Mecha Bomber. I don’t know what they were doing there. All I know is that Mecha Mage sent Mecha Bomber after us,, but we managed to escape. Have you discovered anything new?”

“Not much,” Prof. Ein sighed, “Mecha Mage and Mecha Bomber’s abilities are so advanced that it’s difficult to analyze their data. But it does appear that Mecha Mage is not from Bautnaut. I also have a feeling he’s after something on the planet, considering how Mecha Bomber and he are moving around so much, but I don’t know what it is they’re after. I’m not picking up any signals from the Lightning Tower anymore, so they must have gone from there…in fact, I’m not even seeing any electric currents there anymore.”

Bomberman looked up at the Lightning Tower in the distance. Prof. Ein was right: the tall tower sat atop its hill as before, but it was totally dark and still without its bright electric currents. “Do you know what the Lightning Tower’s purpose is, professor?” he asked.

“It acts as the planet’s power plant, providing electricity for many of the homes and businesses.”

Bomberman scratched his head nervously. “Oh dear. The people of Bautnaut are going to have a lot of repairs to make when they finally thaw out. Mecha Bomber used a Thunder Bomb on the tower’s peak, and I think it blew out the power source.”

Prof. Ein sighed again and looked a bit worried. “We’ll have to help them out somehow when the time comes, but first we have to take care of Mecha Mage and company.” He showed Bomberman another location. “Here’s where they’ve headed to next: Blizzard Valley to the west. The valley leads to Crystal Caverns and the Sparkling Mountains, which contain beautiful and precious crystals. I’ve got a bad feeling the enemies are interested in those crystals. It gets quite cold there, so be careful. I’m counting on you and your Charaboms!”

Bomberman nodded and then looked back at Baglion. “Ready to check out Blizzard Valley, Baglion?” he asked her. Eager to explore such a chilly and beautiful place, she pricked up her ears and proceeded to run in circles around him excitedly. “I’d say that’s a yes!” he laughed. Bomberman headed west with Baglion (or more followed her, since he almost had to run to keep up with her).

Soon the air grew colder and the ground was blanketed in white. The two friends stopped to view their new surroundings for a moment. As far as the eye could see, snow covered the landscape. Patches of ice and metal lay scattered in the snow, and a glittering cave could be seen winding around the slopes of three snowy mountains off in the distance. “This must be Blizzard Valley,” Bomberman said, starting to shiver, “Boy, it sure is cold here. I wish I’d brought a coat!”

Baglion, being an Ice-attribute Charabom adapted to living in snowy areas, did not mind the cold at all; rather, she enjoyed it. She joyfully ran off to play in the snow. “Don’t wander too far!” Bomberman called out. He knew that, while Baglion was more well-behaved than Pommy, she still could be just as playful at times. He watched her roll around in the snow and, seeing that nothing else was going on, decided to follow her.

Baglion jumped up, ran to the nearest patch of ice, and performed figure 8’s like an ice skater. “Baglion Baglion!” she sang with delight. Bomberman was watching her amazing moves so closely that he didn’t notice how close he was to the ice. Since he wasn’t built for moving on ice like Baglion was, he started to slip once he stepped onto it. In an attempt to avoid losing his footing, he ended up sliding in rapid circles and soon went flying into a pile of snow. He popped out from the pile but was still covered in enough snow that he nearly looked like a snowman. Baglion suppressed a giggle.

Bomberman shook off the snow and walked on next to Baglion, who moved a little more slowly this time. As they headed towards Crystal Caverns, they began to see groups of igloos scattered around. “This looks like a town,” Bomberman said. Baglion was curious about the igloos and scampered over to one, poking her head inside its entrance. A moment later she returned to her friend in such a hurry that he was knocked down. “What’s the matter?” he asked, standing back up.

Baglion glanced back at the igloo she’d visited with an apprehensive expression. “Baglion Baglion Baglion!” she exclaimed.

“You saw something scary in that igloo?” Bomberman guessed, and Baglion nodded. He went over to the igloo to see for himself what was inside; Baglion slowly followed but kept her distance. When Bomberman knelt by the entrance and peered inside, he found that there was one thing wrong in the tiny home. A man and woman sat side-by-side in the center, dressed for the weather with warm coats, gloves, and boots…but they were encased in metal just like Sir Reflector back in Mirror Mansion!

Bomberman turned back to Baglion. “Those people were frozen by Mecha Mage, like all the other natives here. I know they might look kind of scary, but they’re really just ordinary people who need our help. If we can only stop Mecha Mage and Mecha Bomber, maybe we can turn them back to normal,” he explained.

Baglion is one of my 23 fanmade Charaboms, and the Ice attribute is one of my four fanmade attributes. Bananas are one of the favorite foods of Charaboms.

Chapter 7!


Before another word could be spoken, two figures darted past up in the sky. “That looks like Mecha Mage and Mecha Bomber now!” Bomberman noted, “They must be headed to Crystal Caverns!” Baglion and he ran after the two villains until they came to a long patch of ice leading to the caverns. “I’ll need your help to get across the ice,” Bomberman told Baglion, who gave a nod and let him take a seat on her back, “I’m counting on you, Baglion!”

Glad to be of help and to have a role in the mission, Baglion smiled and began to run smoothly across the icy field. Even though she was somewhat smaller than Bomberman, she was strong enough to carry him, and her ice-proof paws ensured that she never slipped. Her owner leaned into her warm fur during the short voyage, glad to have a little relief from the cold.

At the other side of the ice sat Crystal Caverns, which was the most beautiful cave the two friends had ever seen. Its long tunnel-like form appeared to be made of crystal itself; it was mainly green but showed hints of other colors in parts, and it sparkled in the sunlight. “There’s Crystal Caverns – what a beautiful place!” Bomberman noticed two men standing in front of the cave who were dressed like guards, but at the moment they looked more like statues. “Those guards won’t be giving us any trouble in that state,” he remarked while Baglion ran right past them and into the cavern.

Once inside, Baglion paused to admire her new surroundings. Bomberman and she gasped in awe at the beauty of Crystal Caverns. The inside was made almost entirely of colorful, glittering crystals, with the exception of a small stream flowing down from somewhere above. Though it was still chilly inside, there was no snow or ice. Bomberman cautiously set one foot on the ground and, once he was sure the floor was not slippery, let himself off Baglion’s back. He walked over to examine some of the crystals on the wall.

“Fascinating, isn’t it?” Prof. Ein chimed in, “It’s been said that Crystal Caverns formed from the water flowing down from the Sparkling Mountains over thousands of years. The water contains multiple types of minerals that hardened to become crystals. The cavern is precious to the people of Blizzard Valley, so they normally keep it heavily guarded.”

“So that means we’ll have to protect it from-” Bomberman was cut off when Mecha Bomber crashed right through the ceiling, causing a loud shattering sound. “-Mecha Bomber!” he finished, lowering his voice despite his surprise. The robot stepped toward one wall, its empty stare fixed on a group of crystals. “It’s going to steal the crystals!” Bomberman said in a voice slightly louder than a whisper, “We have to stop it!”

Baglion and he ran at Mecha Bomber, but it turned around and used an Ice Bomb before they could get too close. They stepped back from the icy spikes that erupted from the bomb just in time. Bomberman shuddered at the freezing air around the ice he’d barely avoided. What now? he thought quickly, I can’t let myself be turned into an ice cube, but if I use Fire Bombs I could damage the crystals! Maybe…a Light Bomb! Of course!

The hero took out a Light Bomb, a yellow bomb that glowed inside. This rare type of bomb was known for its unique abilities; besides creating light that could harm enemies, its blasts also made invisible objects visible and even froze time for machinery they hit. Mecha Bomber apparently knew this somehow, as it began to fly around wildly the moment it saw the bomb. But Bomberman aimed carefully and managed a direct hit with a Big Bomb.

Once the bright light from the bomb faded, it was clear that it had succeeded in freezing time for Mecha Bomber, which stood immobile in midair. “Why didn’t I think of that before?” Bomberman said, excited to have found a way to fight against Mecha Bomber, “Now, Baglion! Attack it!” He tossed more Light Bombs at his target while Baglion fired balls of ice from her mouth. But the time-stopping effect didn’t last forever, and Mecha Bomber soon became mobile again. Though a spark or two could be seen coming from it, it darted away at high speed.

Bomberman and Baglion both took off after the fleeing robot until they arrived at Crystal Caverns’ exit. Now they could tell that they were on the middle mountain of the Sparkling Mountains. The landscape was covered in snow that sparkled unusually brightly in the sunlight. Ahead was a slope that led to the mountain’s peak, and on either side was another snow-covered mountain. The stream that had been flowing through Crystal Caverns appeared to begin at two different spots between the mountains and merged into one path farther down. “So this is the Sparkling Mountains,” Bomberman said, “I can see how they got that name – they’re beautiful!” Baglion and he gazed in awe at the wondrous scenery; even the air around the mountains glittered.

“The mountains may be beautiful, but you should traverse them with caution,” Prof. Ein said, “You’re at high altitude and the air is going to get thinner as you get closer to the peak. Remember to breathe deeply and take it slowly. Also, it’s been said that some kind of buried treasure may be the source of the mountain’s beauty, so I bet that’s what Mecha Bomber is after.”

Bomberman looked around. The robotic enemy was nowhere in sight – could it have reached the peak already? He wanted to catch up to it quickly, but he knew caution was necessary, so he slowly made his way up the slope with Baglion. On the way up they saw a blue dragon-like creature standing in the middle of the slope. At first they thought it might be a statue, but when they passed by it they realized that it was frozen like the people in the igloo. It was huge and looked imposing, but in this state it could do nothing against intruders. “That creature must be the guardian of these mountains…only it can’t guard anything like that,” Bomberman told Baglion.

Well...the blue dragon-like creature wasn't actually made by me (it was shown in one of the screenshots from the cancelled game), but it turns out that I didn't take a good enough look at it the first time. It was actually supposed to be some sort of bird-like creature, not a dragon! The screenshot shows Bomberman fighting it, so it should probably have a different role in the rewrite. Although, if I make the rewrite more original it could still be a dragon.

Chapter 8.

When the two of them neared the peak, the first thing they spotted was none other than Mecha Bomber…and it was using bombs to melt the snow there! Mecha Bomber must be looking for the buried treasure! Bomberman thought. “Oh no you don’t!” he shouted, taking out a bomb. But before he could make a move, Mecha Bomber briefly paused its work to aim a bomb at him. He jumped aside to evade the flames, but he didn’t realize how close he was to the edge of the mountain. He stumbled backward, dropping his bomb and nearly falling, but Baglion promptly stopped his fall by grabbing the back of his belt with her teeth.

Baglion used all her strength to pull her friend back onto land; once he was safe, he looked down at the freezing waters of the stream far below. “Baglion, you saved me from becoming a Bomberman-sicle!” he gave his Charabom friend a grateful hug. Baglion looked a bit tired, but she smiled.

The sound of something smashing through the ground was heard at that moment, and both of them looked up. Mecha Bomber was pulling an enormous chunk of crystal, which was even more colorful and gleamed even more beautifully than Crystal Caverns itself, out of the earth! “I think it’s found the buried treasure!” Bomberman exclaimed, but what could Baglion and he do about it? They were starting to feel slightly dizzy and short of breath from the thinner air. Trying to make a swift enough move would be risky.

“Our only choice is to attack from a distance,” Bomberman concluded. He threw some Light Bombs at the enemy, but it was able to dodge them swiftly despite the heavy load it carried. He paused for a moment, marveling at the robot’s strength. Then, seeing an opportunity to strike, Baglion launched a beam of ice from her mouth that hit Mecha Bomber. It struggled to free itself from the blast, but Baglion persisted until finally, it escaped and zipped away from the mountains.

Baglion would have kept up the attack, except she had to stop to gasp for breath. Bomberman knew it was time for her to take a break. “You did great, Baglion. Please get some rest now.” As much as Baglion wanted to keep going, she was indeed feeling fatigued, so she allowed Bomberman to return her to her Charabox after receiving a pat on the head.

Now that he was alone again, Bomberman took one more look at his surroundings. The Sparkling Mountains were no longer sparkling with the source of their beauty stolen; they looked like ordinary snowy mountains with a giant, deep hole where the chunk of crystal had been. Bomberman shivered harder than before, realizing that it was even colder here than in Blizzard Valley. “I’ve got to go after Mecha Bomber and get that crystal back,” he said to himself, “but first I have to get out of this bitter cold and into better air!”

The adventurer decided he would need help from a strong and versatile Charabom, so he took out a Charabox and tossed it into the air. “SeaWing, I need your help!” Out of the Charabox came a white light, which faded to reveal a very large and long-bodied scaly blue dragon-like Charabom. SeaWing, seeming to know exactly what to do, landed and let his owner climb onto his back before flying down from the mountain.

As SeaWing flew swiftly to a lower elevation, Bomberman was relieved to be able to breathe easier, even if he still felt cold. Farther from the mountain, the air was still cool but warmer than Blizzard Valley had been. Bomberman huddled close to SeaWing; he wasn’t as warm as Baglion, but he was better than nothing.

Soon a slight fog was noticeable in the air. The farther SeaWing moved, the thicker the fog grew until it obscured his vision so much that he was forced to stop. Bomberman squinted, but he could hardly see anything through the fog. “I know I wanted to get out of the thin air, but this is ridiculous!” he said, “This fog is so thick I could practically blow it up with a bomb!” SeaWing made a worried sound and looked from one side to the other.

“A bomb! Of course! A Light Bomb should help us see!” Bomberman got out a Light Bomb and made it big so that it would create even more light. The surrounding visibility was still not clear, but at least it was possible to see nearby objects now. “That’s better, but I still can’t tell where we are,” Bomberman began to speak with Prof. Ein, “Prof. Ein, do you know?”

“If I’m not mistaken, you’re right over the Sapphire Sea,” the professor replied.

This is where the rough draft ends. At that point I got into other things and then sort of lost interest. I don't know when I'll start rewriting this; I still need to think about it some more.

Well...here's my Christian fanfiction for Christmas in case you want to read it. I hope you enjoy!

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14004622/1/Christmas-is-a-Birthday

I wanted to share the first chapter of my current story here, so you can get an idea of what it's like.

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It was morning in Dream Land, and the sun was shining brightly over the peaceful landscapes. Kirby woke up and yawned. Looking out the window, he could see that it was a beautiful day and the perfect time for a walk.

Meanwhile, something strange was going on inside Dream Land's Dream Palace. The Dream Rod, a magical rod that summoned some of Kirby's friends, suddenly began to emit dark energy. Then it shook violently and created a portal directly in front of itself. Magolor, the blue-garbed mage, was thrown out of the portal like a toy. After landing on the floor, he lifted his head to get a look at where he was now. What was that all about? he thought.

All of a sudden, something bounced off Magolor's head. He looked up to see Taranza, the silver-haired spider with magical powers, who was currently standing against the wall...on his head! "Taranza?" the mage was just as puzzled by his friend's arrival as he was by his own.

Taranza opened his eyes. "Magolor?" Noticing he was upside-down, he waved his six floaty hands in an attempt to reposition himself but then resorted to floating into an upright position. "This is the Dream Palace," he remarked, gazing at the pure white marble walls and the Dream Rod, "but no one is here to use the Dream Rod! How did we get here, then?"

"Not a clue," Magolor answered.

At that moment, the two of them heard a thud behind them as a shadow cast over them. They took only a moment to glance at the large pink object behind them before going into a panic. "AAH!" they shouted, running about frantically until they bumped into each other and fell down.

As it turned out, the object that startled Magolor and Taranza was not a monster at all. It was a machine controlled by Susie, the pink-haired former secretary of a robotics company. She removed her yellow visor to reveal her big blue eyes. "Calm down! It's only me!"

Magolor and Taranza stood up, looking relieved. "Susie? Oh, I...uh...knew it was you the whole time," Magolor laughed nervously while Taranza gave him a look, "So what are you doing here?"

"Good question," Susie replied, "All I know is one minute I was taking the Business Suit on a test run, and the next minute I was here!" While she was saying this she hopped out of the Business Suit and pressed a button, and it disappeared. (No one except Susie knew how the machine appeared and disappeared at the press of a button. She'd always say it was top secret, but her friends guessed it was some kind of teleportation.)

Everyone moved back when a beach ball suddenly bounced in their path. "Hey, hey, hey!" said a familiar voice. It was Marx, the mischievous beach ball-loving jester. He was bouncing more and more balls around, not paying a bit of attention to the others.

Outside, Kirby happened to pass by the Dream Palace and could tell that something was amiss. Not only was the palace emanating a mysterious purple light, but there was also a commotion going on inside! As soon as he entered the doorway and saw what was happening he shouted, "Marx, the Dream Palace isn't a playground! Why are you causing so much mischief?"

"You call it mischief, I call it fun," Marx said plainly.

Magolor jumped over a ball that rolled in his direction. Taranza tried to catch one, but it flew over his head. Susie ducked to avoid another that soared above her. "It won't be fun if someone gets hurt!" she said.

Kirby had had enough of this. He started inhaling in his typical vacuum-like fashion; Magolor, Taranza, and Susie had to hold onto the wall to keep from being sucked in while Marx sprouted large, colorful wings and flew as fast as he could against the intense gust. Kirby kept inhaling until he had sucked in every single beach ball in the room. Once he stopped, Marx frowned at him. "Aww, you're no fun!" was all the jester had to say before he flew off.

Kirby approached the other three, who looked a little worn out from everything that had just happened. "Are you guys okay?" he asked them, to which they nodded, "I don't know what got into Marx."

"That trickster! You never know what he'll do next!" Magolor remarked, although sometimes he could be mischievous himself.

"Marx does like to pull pranks, and he might be just a little bit insane…" Taranza added, "but don't you think that was somewhat excessive? He doesn't normally try to hurt his friends with his pranks."

Susie gasped. "The Dream Rod! Look!" The others turned to see the magic rod, looking much darker than usual, quivering and flashing as if it was a hologram.

Kirby ran over and jumped toward the Dream Rod, but it shot out of the Dream Palace at high speed, crashing right through the ceiling. As a result, Kirby landed on his face. "Ouch," he said as he slowly got back up, "I never knew a Dream Rod could be so rude."

"Okay, now things are getting super-ultra-extra weird!" Magolor exclaimed, "First we appear in the Dream Palace, then Marx goes even crazier than usual, and now the Dream Rod is flying on its own to who knows where!"

Kirby looked surprised. "You mean that's why you're here? You appeared without even being summoned?"

"That's what it looks like," Taranza frowned, "We were all minding our own business when someone or something tossed us into the Dream Palace!" He wasn't exactly happy about being treated so roughly and being thrown at Magolor's head, but at least Susie's Business Suit didn't land on either of them.

"I bet all this is connected somehow! We've got to do something!" Kirby took a Warp Star from out of nowhere and hopped onto it, "Come on, we need to find that Dream Rod!" Magolor, Taranza, and Susie jumped on the Warp Star and it flew out of the Dream Palace.

From the moment the four of them came outside, they could see the normally white marble palace was still shrouded in eerie purple light. "What's with the Dream Palace?" Susie asked uneasily, "I've never seen it glowing before!"

"I don't know," Kirby replied, "but we're going to get to the bottom of this! Is everyone with me?"

"You bet I am, buddy!" Magolor said cheerfully.

"Of course. I'd like to find out who or what tossed us around like a salad!" Taranza added.

"A new adventure does sound like fun," Susie chimed in.

Kirby smiled as the Warp Star took off into the sky. Perhaps Magolor, Taranza, and Susie, like many of his other friends, had caused trouble for him when they first met, but they had since changed their ways. Kirby, being the kind soul he was, forgave them. Now the past was behind them, and ahead of them was a brand-new adventure!