Wife wants divorce over money

bèlla said:

Will you be happy alone?

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Being single does not mean being alone. Its simply means to live without a special woman.

Luke Derk said:

Hi forum,
My wife asked me to pay a $15 wifi bill on my way to work this morning. I was already running late and didn't have time to stop, so I asked her to pay it or to wait until I returned so I could pay it. She's upset to the point of telling her whole family that I'm charging her and forcing her to pay things. She's a house wife but occasionally makes money selling clothes, so she had $15. She cursed me all day and slept in a different room when I returned from work. This is the first time I've ever asked her for anything. I work 2 jobs to support our home. I'm I in the wrong for asking her to pay a one time $15?

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This is an extremely trivial dispute and if something this insignificant can possibly jeopardize your relationship then your definitely not right for each other. I guarantee you that this $15 dispute is not the determining factor for your separation it’s just a tiny piece of it. In answer to your question no you weren’t in the wrong at all and she is way overreacting to something this insignificant. There’s a much deeper problem here.

myst33 said:

For your generation, after the WWII, it was so much easier to be pragmatic about hard life, to find a woman, probably from the same village and stay together the whole life, because there were no other possibilities.

For young generations its so different that its not even comparable.

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Scripture does not change. It's the same for Christians regardless of the times.

Luke Derk said:

I see it as a lack of respect. She has access to everything but because I suggested dipping into her pesos instead of risking my job with being late for something that could've waited a few hours. She gets to spend every dime on herself because she's a house wife, so how could I ever dare suggest she help one time so her Netflix won't interrupt? I hope that's not the culture.

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Well ... think of it this way.

According to your description ... you won the hand of the princess. You whisked her away from her Daddy's castle ... and now, you're trying to work it out with her at your hut ...

Dave L said:

Scripture does not change. It's the same for Christians regardless of the times.

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Try to talk to young Christian women, get their past experiences, plans and opinions about life and compare them to your wife in her 20'. And you will see the difference.

Ask them how many men they dated or even slept with already, ask them where and how they date, what they are doing the whole day in their free time, what are their priorities, look at their social online profiles and photos... you will be horrified.

Its not that you have some special formula for happy marriage. Its that your generation had a totally different lifestyle and quite low expectations from life.

Also, there was a lack of men due to world war. Hunger. Poverty. So women took what they could and did not risk divorce. It was socially unacceptable.

BNR32FAN said:

This is an extremely trivial dispute and if something this insignificant can possibly jeopardize your relationship then your definitely not right for each other. I guarantee you that this $15 dispute is not the determining factor for your separation it’s just a tiny piece of it. In answer to your question no you weren’t in the wrong at all and she is way overreacting to something this insignificant. There’s a much deeper problem here.

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She's been described as a spoiled princess ... who the OP is trying to keep ... though, not quite, in the style to which she is accustomed ...

Luke Derk said:

Then I hear she will no longer cook, put my laundry in with the rest of it, or clean if I'm going to "charge" her to live with me. To which I replied, I married you because I love you, not because I needed a maid.

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I’d straight up tell her if this is your reaction to a simple $15 dispute how are we ever going to get thru the real hard times we’re going to face together as a couple? It sounds like she has a zero tolerance level and is being completely self centered. It sounds like you love her but it doesn’t sound like she loves you. I’m very sorry to say that but from what I’ve read here that seems to be the case. Either that or she has some serious issues with throwing out ultimatums on a whim in which case you might actually have to call her bluff to fix the problem or let that be the end of it because you definitely don’t want to go thru the rest of your life tiptoeing like your walking on ice in your relationship.

myst33 said:

Being single does not mean being alone. Its simply means to live without a special woman.

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That's what I'm referencing. Living without someone.

~bella

bèlla said:

That's what I'm referencing. Living without someone.

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I am not sure what you mean.

myst33 said:

I am not sure what you mean.

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Will you be content without a companion long-term?

~bella

myst33 said:

Try to talk to young Christian women, get their past experiences, plans and opinions about life and compare them to your wife in her 20'. And you will see the difference.

Ask them how many men they dated or even slept with already, ask them where and how they date, what they are doing the whole day in their free time, what are their priorities, look at their social online profiles and photos... you will be horrified.

Its not that you have some special formula for happy marriage. Its that your generation had a totally different lifestyle and quite low expectations from life.

Also, there was a lack of men due to world war. Hunger. Poverty. So women took what they could.

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You are making far-reaching assumptions based on your highly limited experience. God keeps his elect from sin and focused on His word. Find a good church, and you'll find a good wife.

Dave L said:

Find a good church, and you'll find a good wife.

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Is this how simple it was for your generation?

bèlla said:

Will you be content without a companion long-term?

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By companion you mean wife?

myst33 said:

By companion you mean wife?

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Yes or girlfriend.

Dave L said:

You are making far-reaching assumptions based on your highly limited experience. God keeps his elect from sin and focused on His word. Find a good church, and you'll find a good wife.

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Dave, how did you meet your wife if you don't mind sharing? What made you notice her?

~bella

bèlla said:

Yes or girlfriend.

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I have been single for years now and I am content with that.

Right now, I have no intentions to return to dating. I like the peace and easy life of singleness.

bèlla said:

Dave, how did you meet your wife if you don't mind sharing? What made you notice her?

~bella

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We were teenage friends. We lived about 1 block from each other.

myst33 said:

Is this how simple it was for your generation?

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God has the goods for his people.

Dave L said:

God has the goods for his people.

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Look, I know that for you it was easy like nothing. Living in the same place, knowing each other from childhood, there were no other possibilities, it was practically certain you will also marry.

But look at how it is today. People do not date on streets, but on dating apps. People travel from place to place, women study till their 28, then they build a career. Then they maybe marry someone they will randomly meet.

Dave L said:

We were teenage friends. We lived about 1 block from each other.

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That's ideal.

~bella