I don't have an issue with encouragement itself, but rather how the use of it has become overkill in contemporary Christian churches in America.
NOTE: Ironically as frustrated as I am with encouragement, it's one of my main spiritual gifts. However I don't encourage in the typical way associated with the spiritual gift of edification; I almost always encourage just by listening to someone and not trying to 'fix them' their problems etc.
Literally the go-to for someone going through a difficult time seems to be encouragement. There is nothing wrong with using encouragement itself, but below are the reasons why I am basically fed up with it:
*Always using encouragement as the go-to solution is a one-size-fits-all approach, and that never works; what works for one person doesn't mean it's going to work for everyone.
*A lot of times Christians aren't doing it to help others but to avoid negativity and make themselves feel comfortable so they can avoid a potentially 'negative' situation/comment etc. and if and/or when they do that, they're no longer using encouragement to help others like the Bible says you're supposed to do with all spiritual gifts
*Using it in the wrong way and at the wrong time does way more harm than good; if it's used in the wrong way and at the wrong time it basically minimizes and devalues the pain, struggling, difficulty a person is going through. Again I'm not saying there's anything wrong with encouragement but encouragement isn't just about edification itself; you also need discernment with when and how to use it, which applies to any of the spiritual gifts.
*Assuming that because you feel loved that way, that everyone else is going to be loved that way. While it's possible someone might feel loved the same way you do (they have the same love language as you do) you can't just assume that. If it's used in the wrong way and/or at the wrong time encouragement can quite frankly be rude and insensitive.
NOTE: Ironically as frustrated as I am with encouragement, it's one of my main spiritual gifts. However I don't encourage in the typical way associated with the spiritual gift of edification; I almost always encourage just by listening to someone and not trying to 'fix them' their problems etc.
Literally the go-to for someone going through a difficult time seems to be encouragement. There is nothing wrong with using encouragement itself, but below are the reasons why I am basically fed up with it:
*Always using encouragement as the go-to solution is a one-size-fits-all approach, and that never works; what works for one person doesn't mean it's going to work for everyone.
*A lot of times Christians aren't doing it to help others but to avoid negativity and make themselves feel comfortable so they can avoid a potentially 'negative' situation/comment etc. and if and/or when they do that, they're no longer using encouragement to help others like the Bible says you're supposed to do with all spiritual gifts
*Using it in the wrong way and at the wrong time does way more harm than good; if it's used in the wrong way and at the wrong time it basically minimizes and devalues the pain, struggling, difficulty a person is going through. Again I'm not saying there's anything wrong with encouragement but encouragement isn't just about edification itself; you also need discernment with when and how to use it, which applies to any of the spiritual gifts.
*Assuming that because you feel loved that way, that everyone else is going to be loved that way. While it's possible someone might feel loved the same way you do (they have the same love language as you do) you can't just assume that. If it's used in the wrong way and/or at the wrong time encouragement can quite frankly be rude and insensitive.
