[Introduction] XeroXipher -- Road to Christianity

x902xXipher

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Hello. My name is Peter Cloutier Jabalee. Age: 30

--When I was 14 I was asked, "Do you believe in God?" and I responded, "No, I wish I could believe, but it's too hard."
I did believe in Hell, but not God, I feared Hell.

--At 19 I moved out on my own and met this overly religious girl.
She would always talk about the Bible, Revelations, Numerology and what it meant in Christianity.
--That year I chose to follow God, however with no direction ended up homeless and became mentally ill.

--From 19 (after my hospital visit) to 20 I was sain, and nothing weird happened in my life.
--The thing is, I felt like I was losing Faith, and I was afraid I might lose all belief one day.
--I thought to myself 'I have to do something so important that God will actually talk to me...
--Suddenly, for me, the lighting in the room became a million times brighter and I hadn't noticed how dim it had been.
--I chose to follow my direction, but what would be so important, God would speak with me.
--I didn't believe God actually spoke to people unless they were important, so I came up with a Plan.

--At 19 (2 months before turning 20) I had decided to smoke a Joint and allow the Devil to go inside my Body while I was High.
--I believed I could help him be forgiven. I believed he was the one and only Devil and I knew him.
--I was wrong, when I finished smoking the Joint, The Devil ran through my head making me twitch yelling "Dirty Wings! Dirty Wings! Dirty Wings!

--I was twitching so bad I ended up leaning over the bed, ready to die and I prayed instinctively, "God Please Help."
--Instantly, I turned over on my back and burped and the High was gone.
--This was the first Miracle I had ever seen. And I was thankful, but my problems were only just beginning.

--The one I call my Insanity Demons became obsessed with me, they sent me into Manic episodes and haunted me in many ways from 20-30.

--At age 25 I became possessed by a Devil shortly after finding out Ghosts were real...
--Possession was serious... Not only that, but Ghosts began to Haunt me and Taunt me.

--There are Good Ghosts and Bad Ones, but seeing someone possessed by the Devil was a Game for all of them.

--I learned how to fight with Spiritual Energy that year... But the more I fight, the more problems I have.

--At 27 I made a choice to Join Satanism as long as they helped me destroy my Insanity Demons...
--The Satanists I joined were known as Shadows (Satanic Ghosts).
--When I left, all Hell came crashing down on me.

--Since 27-30 I have been bouncing around and changing Religions.

--I went from Christian --> LaVeyan Satanism --> Christian --> Theistic Satanism
-->Christian --> Wiccan -->Setian -->Christian.

--I am currently a Christian and when I listen hard enough I know can hear God Speak... My problem now is not Belief, it's the fact that I continously go back to Satan. Sometimes for decent reasons, sometimes just because.

--I want to be a Christian forever.
--I came here, hoping to find Hope when I can't find Hope anywhere else, or a Cause to fight for.
 

Mark Quayle

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Start reading your Bible. Read it like your life depends on it. God is using you, AND using the Devil and the Devil knows it.

This is not about you, but about God. You can't be good enough or understand enough to figure it all out, but you need the Lord Jesus Christ.

Nothing —not even your sanity— is as important as knowing Christ.

"All that the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never cast out."
John 6:37

"For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." 2 Timothy 1:7
 
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Jeshu

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I want to be a Christian forever.
--I came here, hoping to find Hope when I can't find Hope anywhere else, or a Cause to fight for.

Give your heart - all of it - to Jesus to take care of - time and again - and place your faith in God's love for that brings hope, faith in God's love brings true hope. The more truth you digest the freer of demon activity you will become. Taking medicine to calm your head down helps as well.

Please don't focus on evil. The more evil you digest the harder it will be to grow in love. Repent of your occultism and do away with all witchcraft. Protect yourself with God's word and grow in love.

i also battle insanity, i also meddled with demons, yet Jesus set me free and taught me to love God and neighbour so evil could no longer captivate me. i take good anti -psychotic medications as well, that really helps as well. God looks after us spiritually first of all, He did give us medication, and it can help a lot getting the mind to clam down so we can come back to our senses.

Be strong in The Lord and in the strength of His might. Pray to Jesus even now and begin sharing your inner reality with Him - letting His loving truth rebuild you from scratch. It is awesome to be loved by God and have Him living in your heart, that is what you are pinning after, that is what will heal you. God's loving truth ruling your reality is like paradise restored.

Be of very good courage.

Isaiah 61:1-7
The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me,
because the Lord has anointed me
to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim freedom for the captives
and release from darkness for the prisoners,
to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor
and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,
and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes,
the oil of joy
instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the Lord
for the display of his splendor.



They will rebuild the ancient ruins
and restore the places long devastated;
they will renew the ruined cities
that have been devastated for generations.
Strangers will shepherd your flocks;
foreigners will work your fields and vineyards.
And you will be called priests of the Lord,
you will be named ministers of our God.
You will feed on the wealth of nations,
and in their riches you will boast.



Instead of your shame
you will receive a double portion,
and instead of disgrace
you will rejoice in your inheritance.
And so you will inherit a double portion in your land,
and everlasting joy will be yours.



 
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Maria Billingsley

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Hello. My name is Peter Cloutier Jabalee. Age: 30

--When I was 14 I was asked, "Do you believe in God?" and I responded, "No, I wish I could believe, but it's too hard."
I did believe in Hell, but not God, I feared Hell.

--At 19 I moved out on my own and met this overly religious girl.
She would always talk about the Bible, Revelations, Numerology and what it meant in Christianity.
--That year I chose to follow God, however with no direction ended up homeless and became mentally ill.

--From 19 (after my hospital visit) to 20 I was sain, and nothing weird happened in my life.
--The thing is, I felt like I was losing Faith, and I was afraid I might lose all belief one day.
--I thought to myself 'I have to do something so important that God will actually talk to me...
--Suddenly, for me, the lighting in the room became a million times brighter and I hadn't noticed how dim it had been.
--I chose to follow my direction, but what would be so important, God would speak with me.
--I didn't believe God actually spoke to people unless they were important, so I came up with a Plan.

--At 19 (2 months before turning 20) I had decided to smoke a Joint and allow the Devil to go inside my Body while I was High.
--I believed I could help him be forgiven. I believed he was the one and only Devil and I knew him.
--I was wrong, when I finished smoking the Joint, The Devil ran through my head making me twitch yelling "Dirty Wings! Dirty Wings! Dirty Wings!

--I was twitching so bad I ended up leaning over the bed, ready to die and I prayed instinctively, "God Please Help."
--Instantly, I turned over on my back and burped and the High was gone.
--This was the first Miracle I had ever seen. And I was thankful, but my problems were only just beginning.

--The one I call my Insanity Demons became obsessed with me, they sent me into Manic episodes and haunted me in many ways from 20-30.

--At age 25 I became possessed by a Devil shortly after finding out Ghosts were real...
--Possession was serious... Not only that, but Ghosts began to Haunt me and Taunt me.

--There are Good Ghosts and Bad Ones, but seeing someone possessed by the Devil was a Game for all of them.

--I learned how to fight with Spiritual Energy that year... But the more I fight, the more problems I have.

--At 27 I made a choice to Join Satanism as long as they helped me destroy my Insanity Demons...
--The Satanists I joined were known as Shadows (Satanic Ghosts).
--When I left, all Hell came crashing down on me.

--Since 27-30 I have been bouncing around and changing Religions.

--I went from Christian --> LaVeyan Satanism --> Christian --> Theistic Satanism
-->Christian --> Wiccan -->Setian -->Christian.

--I am currently a Christian and when I listen hard enough I know can hear God Speak... My problem now is not Belief, it's the fact that I continously go back to Satan. Sometimes for decent reasons, sometimes just because.

--I want to be a Christian forever.
--I came here, hoping to find Hope when I can't find Hope anywhere else, or a Cause to fight for.
Even Satan believes. Bouncing back and forth is due to your wavering allegiance to one or the other. Satan will continue to pursue and decieve you until you decide once and for all that you love Jesus Christ of Nazareth your Savior more than the adversary. Be blessed.
 
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Deade

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Hello xero xipher, welcome to CF.
I hope you'll enjoy your stay here.


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