Is compassion wrong?

Elizhum

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It's easy to overdo compassion when you lean towards compassion, and easy to not have enough love when you lean towards tough love. Too much of either in a given situation is harmful. How much of either is needed depends on the situation.

Yeah I understand what you are saying. I just don't understand why there are those who have no compassion. It's as if they have no heart or any care for others sufferings. I heard someone say that there are those you can't show compassion to, because they are so emotional. I believe they are so emotional, because they are shown no compassion.
1 John 3:17
But whoso hath this world's good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him?
 
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fhansen

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Hi, I am new here. I was wondering if any of you would have something to say about having compassion towards those who are suffering? My husband believes that tough love is what people need when they are going through pain or depression, but this seems to be driving a wedge between us. My pastor is not big on compassion and love, because he believes it's misused to accept people's sins and do nothing about it. I just don't think we should throw the baby out with the bathwater. I told a story to my husband that when someone has heartburn they take tums to help alkaline their stomach but that it is actually making it worse. Acid reflux is there because there is actually not enough acid. The same with people who crave compassion is because they actually are not getting enough compassion in their lives. But instead those that are in their life withhold compassion to try to make that person "less emotional".
Ephesians 4:32
And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.
Proverbs 11:17
The merciful man doeth good to his own soul: but he that is cruel troubleth his own flesh.
Colossians 3:12
Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering;
1 John 3:18
My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth.
Philippians 2:1-3
If there be therefore any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any bowels and mercies,
2 Fulfil ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind.
3 Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.
Love needs to be the basis of any of our actions. Sometimes tougher love, sometimes less but always with the best interest of the person at heart. Either way, we can never haver too much love-that's a pretty rare commodity in this world and people often make excuses for their lack of it. Love changes people more than anything else-and it's really the highest goal for a Christian-or should be.
 
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Strong in Him

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Hi, I am new here. I was wondering if any of you would have something to say about having compassion towards those who are suffering? My husband believes that tough love is what people need when they are going through pain or depression,

Depression is an illness. Would he give tough love to someone with a broken leg and tell them to run around the block?
"Tough love" won't take away chronic physical pain, and may well add to emotional pain.

My guess is that if he ever suffered pain or depression, he would not be saying that.

My pastor is not big on compassion and love, because he believes it's misused to accept people's sins and do nothing about it.

Well then, he's not acting like God or following Jesus' example.
Did Jesus condemn the woman who was caught in adultery; tell the leaders they were justified in stoning her to death for breaking the law?
Did he condemn the Samaritan women for having had 5 husbands and was now living with someone else?
Exodus 34:6; "The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God."
Psalms 51:1; "Have mercy on me according to your great compassion".
Psalms 86:15; "You are a compassionate God".

I just don't think we should throw the baby out with the bathwater. I told a story to my husband that when someone has heartburn they take tums to help alkaline their stomach but that it is actually making it worse. Acid reflux is there because there is actually not enough acid. The same with people who crave compassion is because they actually are not getting enough compassion in their lives.

:oldthumbsup:

How many harsh, critical and judgemental people only ever received harsh criticism themselves? How many people turned to crime because they never knew love?

We are called to follow Jesus - and Jesus was compassionate.
 
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Bruce Leiter

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Hi, I am new here. I was wondering if any of you would have something to say about having compassion towards those who are suffering? My husband believes that tough love is what people need when they are going through pain or depression, but this seems to be driving a wedge between us. My pastor is not big on compassion and love, because he believes it's misused to accept people's sins and do nothing about it. I just don't think we should throw the baby out with the bathwater. I told a story to my husband that when someone has heartburn they take tums to help alkaline their stomach but that it is actually making it worse. Acid reflux is there because there is actually not enough acid. The same with people who crave compassion is because they actually are not getting enough compassion in their lives. But instead those that are in their life withhold compassion to try to make that person "less emotional".
Ephesians 4:32
And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.
Proverbs 11:17
The merciful man doeth good to his own soul: but he that is cruel troubleth his own flesh.
Colossians 3:12
Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering;
1 John 3:18
My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth.
Philippians 2:1-3
If there be therefore any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any bowels and mercies,
2 Fulfil ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind.
3 Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.

It depends on the situation whether we need to show compassion or confrontation. Compassion in the Bible is sympathy in action, whereas confrontation in love is also biblical. In Matthew 18:15-17, Jesus makes a clear call for us to confront fellow Christians with their public sins; obviously, the rest of the Bible also calls us to do such actions in humble love.

However, your husband is wrong in his attitude toward people experiencing pain or depression. Depression is a disease that needs treatment just as definitely as cancer.

My suggestion to you is not to let this issue get between you and your husband unless it's a matter with others in your family. Then, if your husband is agreeable, search the Scriptures together for passages and their contexts that call for believers' need to express both God's tough and and his tender love.
 
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chad kincham

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Hi, I am new here. I was wondering if any of you would have something to say about having compassion towards those who are suffering? My husband believes that tough love is what people need when they are going through pain or depression, but this seems to be driving a wedge between us. My pastor is not big on compassion and love, because he believes it's misused to accept people's sins and do nothing about it. I just don't think we should throw the baby out with the bathwater. I told a story to my husband that when someone has heartburn they take tums to help alkaline their stomach but that it is actually making it worse. Acid reflux is there because there is actually not enough acid. The same with people who crave compassion is because they actually are not getting enough compassion in their lives. But instead those that are in their life withhold compassion to try to make that person "less emotional".
Ephesians 4:32
And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.
Proverbs 11:17
The merciful man doeth good to his own soul: but he that is cruel troubleth his own flesh.
Colossians 3:12
Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering;
1 John 3:18
My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth.
Philippians 2:1-3
If there be therefore any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any bowels and mercies,
2 Fulfil ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind.
3 Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.

You left out blessed are the merciful for THEY shall receive mercy...
 
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Sketcher

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Yeah I understand what you are saying. I just don't understand why there are those who have no compassion. It's as if they have no heart or any care for others sufferings. I heard someone say that there are those you can't show compassion to, because they are so emotional. I believe they are so emotional, because they are shown no compassion.
1 John 3:17
But whoso hath this world's good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him?
I definitely agree with that verse. We all need to practice both compassion and objectivity. Compassion so we can do good, and objectivity so we can more clearly see what good we need to do.
 
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Lawrence87

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Some people seem to think that being compassionate is the same as enabling someone's destructive behaviour. Sometimes the compassionate thing is to give some tough love. The two are not in conflict.

Sometimes what people need is a stern talking to and to be given an ultimatum in no uncertain terms. In a lot of instances this is done through compassion
 
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public hermit

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Hi, I am new here. I was wondering if any of you would have something to say about having compassion towards those who are suffering? My husband believes that tough love is what people need when they are going through pain or depression, but this seems to be driving a wedge between us. My pastor is not big on compassion and love, because he believes it's misused to accept people's sins and do nothing about it. I just don't think we should throw the baby out with the bathwater. I told a story to my husband that when someone has heartburn they take tums to help alkaline their stomach but that it is actually making it worse. Acid reflux is there because there is actually not enough acid. The same with people who crave compassion is because they actually are not getting enough compassion in their lives. But instead those that are in their life withhold compassion to try to make that person "less emotional".
Ephesians 4:32
And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.
Proverbs 11:17
The merciful man doeth good to his own soul: but he that is cruel troubleth his own flesh.
Colossians 3:12
Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering;
1 John 3:18
My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth.
Philippians 2:1-3
If there be therefore any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any bowels and mercies,
2 Fulfil ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind.
3 Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.

I'm not real sure what tough love means, except among relatives or friends that one can turn a cold shoulder towards. Tough love towards anyone else is simply indifference.

Presumably, tough love will be difficult on both the one exhibiting it and on the one receiving it. The parent who stops enabling the wild child, closing the doors to help or even closing off communication, that's tough on everybody. That is, if love is truly involved.

I'm not saying "tough love" is a good approach. I guess it depends on what it entails. Personally, I think we should always err in favor of love and compassion.

Now, if someone tells me they don't help, much less think about, the homeless, or the needy, or the addicted, or the wayward because their sins caused it and what they need is a little tough love from them, I'm calling it heifer dust.

That's not tough love. Where's the love? It's simply indifference. Either it's indifference, or an outright attitude of condemnation. If it's neither of those, then it will be compassion. It will break your heart that anyone would suffering under sin in that way. What sinner should forgiven sinners not feel compassion towards?
 
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Neogaia777

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I would say, seek God's help always first before each given situation as to what kind of "love" is appropriate first, then do as He says, etc...

And if He leads you wrong, then maybe your not truly hearing from Him, etc, but something else instead, etc...

And if it is something else, and not Him, then this will be a good indicator that maybe you need to seek Him more, or get closer to Him more, etc, then do and/or practice that more, etc...

Until you can truly seek and/or ask Him and get His help for any given situation more, etc...

Then do and/or practice that more, etc...

God Bless!
 
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SANTOSO

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Hi, I am new here. I was wondering if any of you would have something to say about having compassion towards those who are suffering? My husband believes that tough love is what people need when they are going through pain or depression, but this seems to be driving a wedge between us. My pastor is not big on compassion and love, because he believes it's misused to accept people's sins and do nothing about it. I just don't think we should throw the baby out with the bathwater. I told a story to my husband that when someone has heartburn they take tums to help alkaline their stomach but that it is actually making it worse. Acid reflux is there because there is actually not enough acid. The same with people who crave compassion is because they actually are not getting enough compassion in their lives. But instead those that are in their life withhold compassion to try to make that person "less emotional".
Ephesians 4:32
And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.
Proverbs 11:17
The merciful man doeth good to his own soul: but he that is cruel troubleth his own flesh.
Colossians 3:12
Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering;
1 John 3:18
My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth.
Philippians 2:1-3
If there be therefore any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any bowels and mercies,
2 Fulfil ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind.
3 Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.
Dear one,
This is what we have heard apostle Paul have said :
They have become CALLOUS ... -Ephesians 4:19
But that is not the way you learned Christ!' -Ephesians 4:20

What is the meaning of CALLOUS?
The meaning of CALLOUS is said to be insensitive and cruel disregard for others.

If tough love is considered to be insensitive and cruel disregard to others, we can consider that NOT to be the way Christ teach. So those who treat not others with sensitivity and have cruel disregard — they are considered to be CALLOUS.

Dear one, you said that there is a person who believe COMPASSION is misused to accept people's sins and do nothing about it. How is that person accept people’s sins without compassion and do something ? Isn’t that person insensitive and having forgotten his past sins that was cleansed ? What can we consider from his disregard ?

Then, how we not neglect to be sensitive and the right kind of regard to those who have suffered wrong !
This is what we have heard :
Brothers, if ANYONE is caught in ANY TRANSGRESSION, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. -Galatians 6:1

Just like Jesus was gentle to the woman caught in the act of adultery. Did the Lord not RESTORE her ?

Was not the woman found guilty? Yet the Lord have said :

She said, "No one, Lord." And Jesus said, "Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more."]] -John 8:11

Wouldn’t the world first want to see that you sin no more ? Then the world would not condemn you !

Yet, our Lord said first “neither do I condemn you” then He said that “ go and from now on sin no more.”

Do we perceive not His grace or COMPASSION to those who are sinners ?

What actually happened?
Didn’t the Lord bear her guilt on the cross ? Yes, He did.

Though we are not under the Levitical priesthood though which we received the law; for we now receive the law of God through Christ after the order of Melchizedek; let us consider what had been said so that we may understand how the Lord bore the guilt of the guilty on the cross and restore that persons, that they may go and sin no more.

This is what we have heard:
6 Then the Lord said to Moses, 2 “Suppose one of you sins against your associate and is unfaithful to the Lord....4 If you have sinned in any of these ways, you are guilty. You must give back whatever you stole, or the money you took by extortion, or the security deposit, or the lost property you found, 5 or anything obtained by swearing falsely. You must make restitution by paying the full price plus an additional 20 percent to the person you have harmed. On the same day you must present a guilt offering. 6 As a guilt offering to the Lord, you must bring to the priest your own ram with no defects, or you may buy one of equal value.7 Through this process, the priest will purify you before the Lord, making you right with Him, and you will be forgiven for any of these sins you have committed.”- Leviticus 6:1,4-7 NLT

Do we perceive the COMPASSION of our Lord Jesus Christ? So that woman caught in transgression, that is, adultery, — she was guilty. But our Lord took her guilt on the cross and make restitution for her. For the Lord Jesus Christ, inasmuch, hers and our High priest after the order of Melchizedek. Jesus Christ, the high priest purify her before God the Father, and that was how she was forgiven for the sin that she committed.
That is the COMPASSION OF THE LORD.

Also, this is what we have heard how the Lord responded to a woman whose sins are many:

Then turning toward the woman he said to Simon, "Do you see this woman? I entered your house; you gave me no water for my feet, but she has wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. -Luke 7:44
You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in she has not ceased to kiss my feet. -Luke 7:45
You did not anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment. -Luke 7:46
Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven'for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little." -Luke 7:47

So how this woman whose sins were many RESPOND TO the Lord’s COMPASSION?
She has received testimony from the Lord that she LOVED MUCH.

Yes, she has loved much the compassion of the Lord.

For the compassion of the Lord give her strength— the strength of the Lord ! To love the Lord.

For we heard:
We love because He first loved us. -1 John 4:19

Then, apostle John said :
If anyone says, "I love God," and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. -1 John 4:20
And this commandment we have from Him:
whoever loves God must also love his brother.
-1 John 4:21

So the woman who had many sins, having first tasted the compassion of the Lord. She loved much the Lord. The compassion of the Lord gives her the strength of the Lord of the Lord. As we heard:
You then, my child, be STRENGTHENED BY THE GRACE that is in Christ Jesus, -2 Timothy 2:1
When that woman was strengthened in the grace or compassion that is in Christ Jesus. She was enabled to love those who sinned against her ; for she was given the strength of the Lord to release forgiveness to those who offended her. Having forgiven others, she met the condition to be forgiven by our Heavenly Father. For we heard:
For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, -Matthew 6:14

Wouldn’t we loved much for the compassion of the Lord ? For the Lord not only bore our guilt, but also make restitution, and purify us before God.

So dear one,
Are we only to show compassion on those who only suffered wrong ? No.
We are also to told to show our compassion to those who have suffered for what is right.
For we heard:
For as we share abundantly in Christ's sufferings,
so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. -2 Corinthians 1:5

So who show compassion to those who suffered for righteousness’ sake or Christ’s sake, we will also share ABUNDANTLY the comfort of the Lord’s love.
 
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Swan7

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My ves that tough love is what people need when they are going through pain or depression, but this seems to be driving a wedge between us. My pastor is not big on compassion and love, because he believes it's misused to accept people's sins and do nothing about it. I just don't think we should throw the baby out with the bathwater.

If they don't have love, they have nothing: 1 Corinthians 13:2

For every situation had its season and sometimes "tough love" is needed, but only if they truly are allowing God to reign in their heart.
Ecclesiastes 3.
 
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atpollard

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LOVE is doing what is best for the other person even if that is not the best thing for us. If "compassion" makes us feel better and enables the other person to continue a dangerous or destructive course, then that compassion is not LOVE. If "tough love" pushes their problem out of our door so that we don't have to deal with it any more, then that is not LOVE. So the question is not "what does my heart feel", rather the question is "what does that other person NEED"? They need LOVE ... someone to do what is best for THEM whatever the personal cost.

That is what Jesus always did.
 
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jacks

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The examples I can think of where Jesus was confrontational involved leaders abusing their power, not ordinary people. I can’t imagine how compassion and love could be controversial among Christians.
From reading the posts I don't think it is the compassion and love that is controversial. Rather people are wrestling with what is the best way to show that compassion and love.
 
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Elizhum

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Dear one,
This is what we have heard apostle Paul have said :
They have become CALLOUS ... -Ephesians 4:19
But that is not the way you learned Christ!' -Ephesians 4:20

What is the meaning of CALLOUS?
The meaning of CALLOUS is said to be insensitive and cruel disregard for others.

If tough love is considered to be insensitive and cruel disregard to others, we can consider that NOT to be the way Christ teach. So those who treat not others with sensitivity and have cruel disregard — they are considered to be CALLOUS.

Dear one, you said that there is a person who believe COMPASSION is misused to accept people's sins and do nothing about it. How is that person accept people’s sins without compassion and do something ? Isn’t that person insensitive and having forgotten his past sins that was cleansed ? What can we consider from his disregard ?

Then, how we not neglect to be sensitive and the right kind of regard to those who have suffered wrong !
This is what we have heard :
Brothers, if ANYONE is caught in ANY TRANSGRESSION, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. -Galatians 6:1

Just like Jesus was gentle to the woman caught in the act of adultery. Did the Lord not RESTORE her ?

Was not the woman found guilty? Yet the Lord have said :

She said, "No one, Lord." And Jesus said, "Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more."]] -John 8:11

Wouldn’t the world first want to see that you sin no more ? Then the world would not condemn you !

Yet, our Lord said first “neither do I condemn you” then He said that “ go and from now on sin no more.”

Do we perceive not His grace or COMPASSION to those who are sinners ?

What actually happened?
Didn’t the Lord bear her guilt on the cross ? Yes, He did.

Though we are not under the Levitical priesthood though which we received the law; for we now receive the law of God through Christ after the order of Melchizedek; let us consider what had been said so that we may understand how the Lord bore the guilt of the guilty on the cross and restore that persons, that they may go and sin no more.

This is what we have heard:
6 Then the Lord said to Moses, 2 “Suppose one of you sins against your associate and is unfaithful to the Lord....4 If you have sinned in any of these ways, you are guilty. You must give back whatever you stole, or the money you took by extortion, or the security deposit, or the lost property you found, 5 or anything obtained by swearing falsely. You must make restitution by paying the full price plus an additional 20 percent to the person you have harmed. On the same day you must present a guilt offering. 6 As a guilt offering to the Lord, you must bring to the priest your own ram with no defects, or you may buy one of equal value.7 Through this process, the priest will purify you before the Lord, making you right with Him, and you will be forgiven for any of these sins you have committed.”- Leviticus 6:1,4-7 NLT

Do we perceive the COMPASSION of our Lord Jesus Christ? So that woman caught in transgression, that is, adultery, — she was guilty. But our Lord took her guilt on the cross and make restitution for her. For the Lord Jesus Christ, inasmuch, hers and our High priest after the order of Melchizedek. Jesus Christ, the high priest purify her before God the Father, and that was how she was forgiven for the sin that she committed.
That is the COMPASSION OF THE LORD.

Also, this is what we have heard how the Lord responded to a woman whose sins are many:

Then turning toward the woman he said to Simon, "Do you see this woman? I entered your house; you gave me no water for my feet, but she has wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. -Luke 7:44
You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in she has not ceased to kiss my feet. -Luke 7:45
You did not anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment. -Luke 7:46
Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven'for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little." -Luke 7:47

So how this woman whose sins were many RESPOND TO the Lord’s COMPASSION?
She has received testimony from the Lord that she LOVED MUCH.

Yes, she has loved much the compassion of the Lord.

For the compassion of the Lord give her strength— the strength of the Lord ! To love the Lord.

For we heard:
We love because He first loved us. -1 John 4:19

Then, apostle John said :
If anyone says, "I love God," and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. -1 John 4:20
And this commandment we have from Him:
whoever loves God must also love his brother.
-1 John 4:21

So the woman who had many sins, having first tasted the compassion of the Lord. She loved much the Lord. The compassion of the Lord gives her the strength of the Lord of the Lord. As we heard:
You then, my child, be STRENGTHENED BY THE GRACE that is in Christ Jesus, -2 Timothy 2:1
When that woman was strengthened in the grace or compassion that is in Christ Jesus. She was enabled to love those who sinned against her ; for she was given the strength of the Lord to release forgiveness to those who offended her. Having forgiven others, she met the condition to be forgiven by our Heavenly Father. For we heard:
For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, -Matthew 6:14

Wouldn’t we loved much for the compassion of the Lord ? For the Lord not only bore our guilt, but also make restitution, and purify us before God.

So dear one,
Are we only to show compassion on those who only suffered wrong ? No.
We are also to told to show our compassion to those who have suffered for what is right.
For we heard:
For as we share abundantly in Christ's sufferings,
so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. -2 Corinthians 1:5

So who show compassion to those who suffered for righteousness’ sake or Christ’s sake, we will also share ABUNDANTLY the comfort of the Lord’s love.

Thank you so much! I needed to hear that!
 
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Elizhum

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LOVE is doing what is best for the other person even if that is not the best thing for us. If "compassion" makes us feel better and enables the other person to continue a dangerous or destructive course, then that compassion is not LOVE. If "tough love" pushes their problem out of our door so that we don't have to deal with it any more, then that is not LOVE. So the question is not "what does my heart feel", rather the question is "what does that other person NEED"? They need LOVE ... someone to do what is best for THEM whatever the personal cost.

That is what Jesus always did.

Wow! Thank you!
 
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Elizhum

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From reading the posts I don't think it is the compassion and love that is controversial. Rather people are wrestling with what is the best way to show that compassion and love.
In a way it is a matter of whether or not to show love and compassion.
 
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apogee

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Compassion is emulating the suffering of another, so that you can understand their pain and hopefully act to relieve it.

The point of compassion is that it serves to motivate and direct action. With depression there is no simple action that works, and it’s not helpful to emulate depression in yourself, cos it’s so damn toxic.

So tough love, it’s love but it’s tough, it beats the demons out with a stick, except it usually doesn’t, if anything it just irritates them enough to lash out either at you, or at the victim, which might serve to get the victim to recognise that depression is a parasite.

So basically tough love or compassion? probably neither, but maybe a combination of both.

Ultimately the depressed person needs support developing tools to manage the depression themselves, counselling can really help here if nothing else to find effective strategies.

The best strategies are really simple ones like regular exercise and creative outlets.

Well at least that’s my take on it.
 
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FutureAndAHope

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The same with people who crave compassion is because they actually are not getting enough compassion in their lives. But instead those that are in their life withhold compassion to try to make that person "less emotional".

I agree with your sediment here. As a person who went through a huge emotional rollercoaster, I could not agree more, in my case I was deprived of affection/compassion for many years and it caused me to struggle greatly. People who, had it all together, tried to fix me, but they really had no clue. Eventually, with God's help I was able to overcome, but it was not an easy ride. Compassion should be the standard for our interactions.
 
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