Is being single a lifetime or a season calling

Can you add some context to the question so some can answer it properly?

The Bible speaks about being single and marriage, Paul recommends that those marry if their "passion burns", which suggests that if one is able to dim or erase that passion for the opposite sex, that that is the best path to take to come closest to the Lord. Makes logical sense, you can do more for God if God is the main focus in your life instead of a mate.

Christian Bowler said:

Same question as the OP title.

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Depends on if you are just red pilled or MGTOW

Being single is based on values:
The value of rules.
The value of a mate.
The value of a marriage.
The value of a child or children.
The value of your personal space.
The value of your personal privacy, etc.

And there is no such thing as a 'season or lifetime calling' as all human relationships come to an end. So you can suppose that you are connected to another person for the long or the short haul but that is always subject to change.

It could be seasonal or it could be lifetime. I would guess that seasonal is the situation for most singles. Many need more of God's touch before marriage. Better to be full of the spirit, and get married as a whole person, than be needy and half awake in Christ. Some may think they are waiting on God, but instead God is waiting on them.

Well I'm almost 59 and still single. But the Lord could still change that situation eventually. A helpmate in my old age would not be a bad thing.

Christian Bowler said:

Same question as the OP title.

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Jesus and Paul were single. The scribes at Qumran where the Dead Sea Scrolls were copied were living single. Their cemetery contained all male skeletons. John the Baptist was likely single. Peter was married. Paul wrote about other apostles being married.

Sometimes people remain single as they can find no other way. In my 55+ community some have become widows or widowers. Some of these will remarry, some will not. Some couples share a home without marrying.

In my state a spouse may be financially responsible for the other spouse’s medical bills. Medical bills are a leading cause of personal bankruptcy.

Singles are not supposed to do premarital sex or homosexuality.

Some people are just better versions of themselves when single. For those, I'd say it's not worth the hassle of worrying about a banal expectation set by society - so get out there, live your best life before it's over. You're not missing out on anything bar the sobering 'post event' clarity. And it's really not worth denting your walk for - believe me.

Some level up and enter a new realm when in a relationship. Talking from a male perspective, I've seen some of the most selfish, millennial style hipsters find a girl, take on their kids and do a mighty fine job of it. It's almost like they unveil a new version of themselves and it REALLY works for them.

In my world, I'm once again in that limbo land of knowing a really nice girl (with a child - a great kid by the way, that she's brought up entirely on her own) and getting along with her great. She's Christian too and we actually go back a LONG time.

My problem, is that I have no idea anymore about how much of the first person I talk about in this post, and how much of the second person I am.

The selfish hipster in me I know well. I haven't met the other guy yet. I might not EVER be that second guy.I might always be a self absorbed individual.

Could be either. Or it could just be your circumstances and have nothing to do with calling.

I think it could be either. For any individual (this is in context of this being a Christian site) I would suggest to pray and read any inspired passages of the the Bible and, or course, talk with your church Pastor or any other leader/mentor in your church or church community.

Christian Bowler said:

Same question as the OP title.

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The answer is yes, maybe, sometimes, and depends.

Sometimes being single is just being single. And sometimes people make the deliberate choice of celibacy, sometimes for a time, and other times they devote themselves to it as a life-long discipline.

There's no right or wrong about this. It's all a matter of your own conscience and personal choices. Do you want to be single? Then be single. Do you want to pursue a romantic partnership, then do that. Whether single or as part of a couple, as a Christian live to honor God and love your fellow human beings.

-CryptoLutheran

Well I'm 41 and still single but waiting on God for just the right guy.

For me, both. Sort of.

Seasonal in that there was a season of my life where I did NOT want to be single. I even got married. Then I got divorced.

Now I'm in the season of WANTING to be single, and this season has lasted much longer...probably for the rest of my life if I am lucky?

Only you need to seek God and find that answer for yourself. Noone here can really give that to you.

lifetime unfortunately

For some it might be a calling. For many it's a sign of the times.

Sometimes singleness is a vocation. The person chooses to remain alone in deference to their faith or mission.

Sometimes its the result of experiences (good or bad) that compels them to avoid relationships.

Sometimes the desire for companionship is set aside for a time in deference to circumstances or other pursuits.

Sometimes its a factor of non engagement, fear, limited opportunities, or inability to find a partner.

A certain level of romantic fatalism has become fairly common in modern pop-religion. A lot of that is Western culture's infatuation with the kismet, that there is a destiny, a fate, involving our one true soul mate. Theologically speaking, this is problematic: Fatalism is contrary to a basic Christian understanding of God's relationship with creation. Fate is a distinctively Pagan teaching, in which quite literally there are cosmic forces pulling the strings, and all the events in our lives are the product of the fates, of the arrangement of the stars, etc.

But Scripture is clear, while God has a will for our lives (revealed in the plain commandments and instruction of God, namely that we trust in Jesus and love our neighbor) we remain morally culpable, the path set before us is not fated, but is the invitation to the unknown, to put our faith in Christ, and to use our conscience and our best judgment to navigate life as Jesus' disciples.

In spite of what my profile says, I haven't been in a relationship for several years (haven't figured out how to change it). Is there a specific someone--a "soul mate"--that God has chosen just for me? No, I don't think so. But that isn't said in a depressing or negative sense, If I find someone then great, and if I don't, that's also okay. The point is what I do now, how do I live my life now. Right now I am a Christian, and so right now I am to love my neighbor. If I remain celibate and chaste for the remainder of my life, then glory be to God; and if I find the woman of my dreams, then glory be to God.

Jesus isn't our match maker. He's our Lord, our King, our Savior, and our God.

-CryptoLutheran

When I read the bible I don’t come away with the sense that marriage is God’s primary focus. The one thing He’s concerned about above all. Yet it seems that way with some.

Desire is a lot like mint. It serves a purpose when contained. But its never content to stay put. It invades other spaces and takes over if left unchecked.

Like this.



This is what happens when desire runs amok. You’re overgrown, overwhelmed, and discombobulated.

But when you rein it in things look different. Order is restored. You’re not dominated by thoughts and emotions. The spirit can have sway.