Cormack

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But just know, I only do my "banging and screaming" online only really

I try my best to be abstract, it’s better to be all about ideas, not people. That way we can approach the view without wounding the person. So I didn’t mean to implicate you in any way. :)

Online is definitely an addictive (sometimes toxic) sink hole. It robs people of time and feeds some kind of compulsion in us, especially if we lack other facets of life like a relationship, job, kids, silly hobbies etc.

It steals from the open air, in person life in favour of the false digital life, an imitation.

I think everyone should go out and do real in person teaching (so far as they’re able,) that way, when they come back online, they’re equipped with all kinds of new skills and ways of being.

Never stop learning my brother.

God bless and cheers for listening in return.
 
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Cormack

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I'm already moving away from being on here (online) so much, but don't know if anybody noticed, etc, and may give it up entirely soon, etc, and devote myself to more person to person interactions, and being and doing love, etc, and more prayer, etc...

I’m afraid we’re all wrapped up in ourselves my brother. No matter how hard we work, or even how outrageous we behave, most people are deeply focused on themselves and their lives, their private pain and thoughts.

It’s very easy to feel bitter over that, but we are the same.

The best we can do is become other centric. To try and bless the people we meet and make friendships that last.
 
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Neogaia777

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I try my best to be abstract, it’s better to be all about ideas, not people. That way we can approach the view without wounding the person. So I didn’t mean to implicate you in any way. :)

Online is definitely an addictive (sometimes toxic) sink hole. It robs people of time and feeds some kind of compulsion in us, especially if we lack other facets of life like a relationship, job, kids, silly hobbies etc.

It steals from the open air, in person life in favour of the false digital life, an imitation.

I think everyone should go out and do real in person teaching (so far as they’re able,) that way, when they come back online, they’re equipped with all kinds of new skills and ways of being.

Never stop learning my brother.

God bless and cheers for listening in return.
Thanks brother...

Much love to you in Christ...

Peace...

God Bless!
 
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Neogaia777

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I’m afraid we’re all wrapped up in ourselves my brother. No matter how hard we work, or even how outrageous we behave, most people are deeply focused on themselves and their lives, their private pain and thoughts.

It’s very easy to feel bitter over that, but we are the same.

The best we can do is become other centric. To try and bless the people we meet and make friendships that last.
Well, I'll let you in on a little secret with me now, but I do just fine when I'm all alone and not around other people really, etc, and do just fine a great, great deal of the great majority of the time actually, etc, but not so much when I'm dealing with or are around other people, etc, most especially with other people "in groups", etc, and I'm kind of ashamed of it actually, etc, a little bit anyway, etc, as I don't if it's "right", etc, but is the way things have become for me now, etc...

But I'll be damned if I'm going to just completely give up on other people though, etc...

Cause I won't, etc...

Anyway, thanks for listening...

God Bless!
 
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Neogaia777

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Well, I'll let you in on a little secret with me now, but I do just fine when I'm all alone and not around other people really, etc, and do just fine a great, great deal of the great majority of the time actually, etc, but not so much when I'm dealing with or are around other people, etc, most especially with other people "in groups", etc, and I'm kind of ashamed of it actually, etc, a little bit anyway, etc, as I don't if it's "right", etc, but is the way things have become for me now, etc...

But I'll be damned if I'm going to just completely give up on other people though, etc...

Cause I won't, etc...

Anyway, thanks for listening...

God Bless!
I'm really not selfish though, cause that's not what this is, etc, but I am also not ever angry, or jealous, or depressed, sorrowful, pitiful, etc, I have God, etc, and I have peace when I'm alone, etc, but He is telling me to get out more, etc, and do life with other people more, etc, so I am going to be headed more so in that direction very soon, etc, in fact I have already started, etc, got a few friends I spend regular time with regularly, etc, people that I deal with regularly, etc...

Groups are still difficult though, etc...

Anyway...

God Bless!
 
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Cormack

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but I do just fine when I'm all alone and not around other people really,

Amen, or should I write a man. :preach:

That’s classic male style though, I feel the same and only wish I wasn’t living in the city, it condenses everything, it quadruples every interaction and expands every crowd, not to mention it robs men of nature.

My city? “England’s car park” people call it.

I understand your point about groups. Someone once wrote a book titled the wisdom of crowds, now, however wise they are, we don’t much like them. :tearsofjoy: Paradise was green fields, a garden with only 1 other person, so maybe hell is the big city with hoards of groups all jammed together competing to be heard.

and do life with other people more, etc, and I am going to be headed more so in that direction very soon, etc, in fact I have already started, etc, got a few friends I spend regular time with regularly, etc, people that I deal with regularly, etc...

That’s awesome. I’ll pray you go from strength to strength my guy, brave and bold in the crowds and one on one. Leading more people to love the Lord and to see His image in you.

Like always, it’s a pleasure. Don’t forget the little people on CF when you’re fully trained to wreak every stronghold raised up against Jesus. :)
 
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Neogaia777

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Oh and @Cormack... I've gotten completely over the whole "online thrill" a long long time ago now, etc... It juts feels like "work" now, etc, which is why I may soon retire soon for awhile, etc...

Well, that's not the only reason, but may be one of them, etc, as I've already just went into a few of my other reasons, that are other reasons, etc...

Anyway...

God Bless!
 
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Neogaia777

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Amen, or should I write a man. :preach:

That’s classic male style though, I feel the same and only wish I wasn’t living in the city, it condenses everything, it quadruples every interaction and expands every crowd, not to mention it robs men of nature.

My city? “England’s car park” people call it.

I understand your point about groups. Someone once wrote a book titled the wisdom of crowds, now, however wise they are, we don’t much like them. :tearsofjoy: Paradise was green fields, a garden with only 1 other person, so maybe hell is the big city with hoards of groups all jammed together competing to be heard.



That’s awesome. I’ll pray you go from strength to strength my guy, brave and bold in the crowds and one on one. Leading more people to love the Lord and to see His image in you.

Like always, it’s a pleasure. Don’t forget the little people on CF when you’re fully trained to wreak every stronghold raised up against Jesus. :)
Thanks man.

But I don't want to ever be "puffed up" when I am in or are around groups, etc, and in fact, I don't want to ever be "puffed up" at all ever, etc, but just can't help how in crowds and in everyone else's group gatherings, can't help but notice how "everyone else seems to be", etc, in those situations, etc, and that sometimes makes me "angry", etc...

I think it's all very, very "stupid", etc, and it can make me angry, etc...

Especially sometimes directly at the people who are the top, or who put themselves at the top of the, "pecking order", etc...

The whole fact that there even has to be a "pecking order", etc...

Peoples weight and/or ego's being thrown around, etc...

Can make me angry...

Anyway, thanks brother...

Oh, and I don't consider any of you guys "little" also, etc...

Anyway...

God Bless!
 
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Neogaia777

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God love you. Feel free to write me anytime, man to man and brother to brother.
Thanks man.

Going to go to bed or lay down for awhile now, so have a good night, K...

Thanks again...

Much love to you in Christ...

Peace...

God Bless!
 
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aiki

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I'm already moving away from being on here (online) so much, but don't know if anybody noticed, etc, and may give it up entirely soon, etc, and devote myself to more person to person interactions, and being and doing love, etc, and more prayer, etc...

2 Timothy 2:24-26
24 The Lord's bond-servant must not be quarrelsome, but be kind to all, able to teach, patient when wronged,
25 with gentleness correcting those who are in opposition, if perhaps God may grant them repentance leading to the knowledge of the truth,
26 and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, having been held captive by him to do his will.


As you're coming to understand, it is only God who is able to "grant repentance to the acknowledging of the truth." We can share God's truth with others, but have no power to make them accept that truth. When one settles into this fact, it creates an easiness in discussions of Christian doctrine that dissolves much of the frustration you've described.

I've taken the odd break from CF. Sometimes months in length. No one notices. This highlights for me why online-only "relationships" are typically so superficial. There is a depth of relating that happens face-to-face, in person, that cannot be replicated in forums on CF, no matter how open, and honest, and pleasant one is. I would live in a very small, lonely world if the only interactions I had with folks were online ones.
 
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TedT

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All my answers are contentions of the unorthodox Pre-Conception Existence Theology. Our election to be HIS heavenly Bride and the fall into sin happened before the creation of the physical universe. After earth was created, it became the prison for the demonic angels with a rehab centre for the fallen elect to sequester the polite society of heaven from our evil.

But recently I've started asking questions I've never let myself ask before, like: "Why do the damned suffer eternal punishment for temporal sins?"
They don't - they sinned an eternal sin referred to as the unforgivable sin.

They can't be forgiven because
- they made the decision to rebel against GOD's claims to Deity by their free will and a free will decision cannot be changed by anyone unless the person asks for it to be changed.

- Once they rebelled they became enslaved by the addictive power of evil which destroyed their ability to seek true repentance. They were instantly and totally unable to repent of their evil and committed fully to the belief they were right to rebel against this upstart liar and false god.

- Having chosen to reject the false god's offer to help them and knowing that if HE should ever prove HE was indeed our GOD that they would go to hell, they still chose to end in hell rather than married to HIM in heaven believing all the god and hell stuff was just lies from a false god.

I find that the marriage of the Lamb to the Church to be the reason for our creation since it is the culmination of the story of our creation, fall and restoration. Since a true marriage based on love cannot be forced in the least at all, HIS proposal had to be accepted by a free will decision made by faith, ie, an unproven hope, because if proof of HIS Deity and power were given before HIS proposal was accepted all would be forced by this proof to bow to HIM and to claim to love HIM whether they were inclined to do this before they saw the proof or not.

Thus, as the only way to become elect and, chosen to be HIS Bride, was by faith, not by sight or proof, once proof is given it is impossible to change one's mind and accept the proposal of marriage because it was forced on them by the proof, not chosen freely as a hope by faith. HE does not want a Stepford wife...

PCE contends that we made these choices before the creation of the physical universe and when all our choices were finished HE gave the proof to us all by the creation which we all saw, Job 38:7. Once that proof was given, all self chosen fates were sealed for all eternity...Rom 1:18-20.

"If God knew the vast majority of people would end up in unbearable agony for all eternity, why did he ever create humankind?"
No vast majority of anyone end in hell; the vast majority of those created in HIS image made the choice to not only put their faith in HIM and so become HIS elect but they also chose to stay holy to HIS commands. They are not sown into this world as they have no need for redemption. They live and work as the holy elect angels.

Only sinners are sown, planted - not created - into this world as per the two part parable of the weeds in Matt 13.

But your point is well made. Why create those who HE knows will end in hell when HE has made it clear HE has no desire for them to go to hell and takes no pleasure in their death which includes going to hell when all HE needed to do to keep hell empty was to not create those HE knew would sin the unforgivable sin.

This is the base of my personal contention that we have defined HIS omniscience improperly because it blasphemes HIS good nature, HIS perfect benevolence. HE did not fail in HIS loving kindness, we only believe HE must have and then we must call it good because HE did it! Well, no, we are making a mistake somewhere, probably in our basic premises, not GOD. I came to the point of praying that only if HE would solve this very conundrum and ease my cognitive dissonance without have to use double think to do so (Doublethink: thinking two opposites are true at the same time and not trying to reconcile them except to say that they are reconciled.)

If he could not reconcile this for me, I was not going to commit to HIM. Within a year I was introduced to Pre-Conception Existence (PCE) Theology and over the next 5 r 6 years I studied the bible to see how the verses PCE quoted stacked up to orthodoxy. Not only did I decide that PCE understands reality better than orthodoxy, I also decided that it interpreted the bible better and my conviction grew that the Spirit leading me was the Holy Spirit.

"Why can't God just destroy the wicked on Judgement Day? Why keep them around for the sole purpose of torturing them?"
First I must strongly reject that HIS sole purpose was their torture, a very morally laden word. The execution of a just sentence for a crime by a properly authorized Judge is not accepted as torture by any gov't on earth nor by any dictionary. Torture is the illegal use of pain and suffering to force someone to give you what you want.

But that leaves us with the question" "why is the sentence for the unforgivable sin not annihilation rather than the death of the undead, an eternity in the outer darkness without GOD."

My personal suggestion is that HE must have chosen to create us as eternal so that those who chose to put their faith in HIM and so be elected to eternal life in the heavenly marriage would be able in fact to have that, even though it meant those who rejected HIS proposal would have eternal life in hell.

Eternal life may not be something that can be added onto a mere mortal life but maybe must be something in the person's created nature. I have no leading on any answer more than this, but I trust in HIS loving righteousness and justice that IF HE could end their suffering with annihilation (like so many believe) HE would do so.
 
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Cormack

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But recently I've started asking questions I've never let myself ask before, like: "Why do the damned suffer eternal punishment for temporal sins?"

I’m first noticing this question thanks to @TedT. I’ve read up on the subject so I’d be happy to answer that question from the perspective of someone who believes in eternal punishment, then add some thoughts from people who disagree with eternal conscious torment.

“Why would a finite crime merit an eternal punishment?”

Believers in the classic understanding of hell will reply it isn’t a simple finite sin, since the sinners crime isn’t against just you or me, but against God Himself.

It’s a finite crime in time, but the magnitude of the crime is bigger than its mere duration.

The duration of a crime is no measure of severity after all. A crime like murder for example can happen in an instant, one punch.

While other crimes like art theft could be planned for years and years. Yet we’d much rather have a painting robbed than see someone killed.

The duration people would say isn’t the issue. The issue is about committing a sin against Gods infinite majesty.

The crime is finite, but the magnitude of the crime infinite.

That’s the reply of someone who believes strongly in hell. Take awhile to think it through before reading on, maybe that argument convinces you.

It’s logical, it held true in my mind for a long time. So let it sink in and consider the value behind those thoughts.
———————-
On the other end of the conversation, people have debated that if the crime against God is truly infinite in magnitude, then Gods never going to achieve justice.

An infinitely grand crime can’t be made right by sending people to hell forever, the sinner might be moving towards infinity, and being punished forever, but it’s not like we’d ever arrive at justice being done.

Sin wins and the debt is never repaid, justice is never done.

So, some people reason, if the punishment is infinite for a finite crime, that’s unjust.

But if the crime is infinite, and the punishment never truly arrived at infinity, that too is unjust!

So the other group argues it’s a lose lose situation for the believer in eternal conscious torment (or ECT.)
————————————
My perspective might seem alien :spaceinvader: but I believe in hell, there’s a difference from the classical view though, I no longer believe hell is forever.

And I don’t believe hell is about retributive punishment, it’s about reform.

I trust in what the Bible says in Philippians 2, which says “at the name of Jesus every knee will bow, in heaven, and on earth and under the earth. And every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.”

It’s not the purpose of this thread to argue for a universalist perspective, but at least for your questions about hell and infinite punishment, I hope this helps.
 
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BNR32FAN

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I've been a Christian for 3 and a half years, and for the first time, I'm starting to really wrestle with the idea of a loving God sending people to Hell. Throughout my life as a Christian, I've never questioned it. I've always thought, "Of course it's fair that God sends non-Christians to Hell! Their sins aren't paid for, so they have to take the punishment of their sins upon themselves." I never really allowed myself to think about the concept of eternal suffering too hard, because I was afraid that if I started questioning the fairness of this, I would end up leaving the faith. But recently I've started asking questions I've never let myself ask before, like: "Why do the damned suffer eternal punishment for temporal sins?" "If God knew the vast majority of people would end up in unbearable agony for all eternity, why did he ever create humankind?" "Why can't God just destroy the wicked on Judgement Day? Why keep them around for the sole purpose of torturing them?"

Today I was reading an article about the physical suffering of Jesus on the Cross, and couldn't help but think to myself, "the people in Hell will suffer just as much, if not more, than this. And while Jesus' physical torture lasted less than 24 hours, their torture will never end." I immediately tried to push this blasphemous thought out of my head, but it still lingers.

Now that I'm having these questions, it's getting much harder to walk with the Lord like I used to. It's very difficult to feel affection for God when I remember that He's going to sentence the vast majority of humanity to an eternity of unimaginable torture, with no hope of relief. I mean, how does this knowledge not drive us all insane? I can't even walk around Walmart anymore without constantly thinking to myself, "Most of the people in this store will spend eternity in Hell." I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm going crazy.

I know that no matter what my feelings tell me, my God is just and merciful. I understand that any punishment God hands out is perfectly fair. I know that He is not a sadistic monster, no matter how strongly I feel otherwise. So please do not read this post as me accusing God of those things, because I'm not. I just need to figure out how to reconcile my belief that God is good with my belief that God condemns 99% of people to eternal, conscious torment.

Sorry if this post is all jumbled or makes no sense, I'm really not in the right mental state to be forming coherent thoughts right now.

Well some believe that the suffering is not eternal and that in hell the spirit is destroyed or put to death. To be honest I’m undecided on this issue because I do see evidence of both eternal suffering and spiritual death so I haven’t exactly made up my mind on what to expect. I sort of think of it as irrelevant and simply trust that whatever God has chosen will ultimately be far better than any plan of mine.
 
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cerulean

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Why don't you desire God? Why do you think others do greatly desire Him?
i didn’t say i don’t desire Him at all, just that i don’t think i have a “deep, abiding desire” for Him. it’s more of a weak, faltering desire. there are some times when i barely desire a relationship with God at all, when i don’t want to pray or read the Bible or anything like that. maybe it’s laziness, maybe it’s avoiding God because i feel condemned, or maybe it’s because i really am condemned and don’t love God. i don’t know.

i think a part of it is that deep down, it’s really hard for me to believe that a close, intimate relationship with God is even possible for someone like me. of course i know that’s objectively false. but at least subconsciously, i see myself as a second-class Christian who could never actually be friends with God. i know that God loves me, but it’s extremely hard for me to believe that He likes me. i subconsciously view God as being constantly angry and disappointed in me, so is it any wonder that i don’t experience a “deep, abiding desire” to get to know Him? of course i realize, at least on an intellectual level, that this view of God is not correct. but it’s incredibly hard to shake that image of God away, to re-train my brain to view God as the loving, merciful Father that He is. and it’s also hard to feel like i can have a relationship with God because relationships largely involve emotion, which as i’ve mentioned is an area im not very gifted in (i’m on the autism spectrum).

sorry, i kind of went off on a tangent there. my point is, i do have some desire for God. at least i think so. for all i know my “desire” that i think i have for God could just be a superficial desire for His gifts. i don’t know. i’ve done so much introspection and self-examination since i became a Christian (assuming i ever did), but i’ve never been able to find a sure answer as to whether or not i’m saved.
 
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TedT

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i’ve done so much introspection and self-examination since i became a Christian (assuming i ever did), but i’ve never been able to find a sure answer as to whether or not i’m saved.
Heb 11:1 Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen (proven). Faith is unproven HOPE! No matter how you feel about not having the proof you seek, do you hope in an eternal life with Christ enough to stay the path?

Romans 8:24 For in this hope we were saved; but hope that is seen (proven) is no hope at all. In other words, proof ends faith yet we are saved by faith, not proof.

Much has been written about the dismay of uncertainty due to a lack of proof: 2 Corinthians 4:18 So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, (proven) but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. It seems to be an attribute of faith that the longer one lives by faith, an unproven hope, the stronger one's conviction of salvation from sinfulness by Christ grows.
 
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The Narrow Way

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I've been a Christian for 3 and a half years, and for the first time, I'm starting to really wrestle with the idea of a loving God sending people to Hell. Throughout my life as a Christian, I've never questioned it. I've always thought, "Of course it's fair that God sends non-Christians to Hell! Their sins aren't paid for, so they have to take the punishment of their sins upon themselves." I never really allowed myself to think about the concept of eternal suffering too hard, because I was afraid that if I started questioning the fairness of this, I would end up leaving the faith. But recently I've started asking questions I've never let myself ask before, like: "Why do the damned suffer eternal punishment for temporal sins?" "If God knew the vast majority of people would end up in unbearable agony for all eternity, why did he ever create humankind?" "Why can't God just destroy the wicked on Judgement Day? Why keep them around for the sole purpose of torturing them?"

Today I was reading an article about the physical suffering of Jesus on the Cross, and couldn't help but think to myself, "the people in Hell will suffer just as much, if not more, than this. And while Jesus' physical torture lasted less than 24 hours, their torture will never end." I immediately tried to push this blasphemous thought out of my head, but it still lingers.

Now that I'm having these questions, it's getting much harder to walk with the Lord like I used to. It's very difficult to feel affection for God when I remember that He's going to sentence the vast majority of humanity to an eternity of unimaginable torture, with no hope of relief. I mean, how does this knowledge not drive us all insane? I can't even walk around Walmart anymore without constantly thinking to myself, "Most of the people in this store will spend eternity in Hell." I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm going crazy.

I know that no matter what my feelings tell me, my God is just and merciful. I understand that any punishment God hands out is perfectly fair. I know that He is not a sadistic monster, no matter how strongly I feel otherwise. So please do not read this post as me accusing God of those things, because I'm not. I just need to figure out how to reconcile my belief that God is good with my belief that God condemns 99% of people to eternal, conscious torment.

Sorry if this post is all jumbled or makes no sense, I'm really not in the right mental state to be forming coherent thoughts right now.

My husband recently wrote a book and one chapter deals with your exact question ~ please take the time to read it and I believe you will have most of your questions answered and find great spiritual relief :) https://www.seekfortheoldpaths.com/...d-who-can-destroy-both-soul-and-body-in-hell/
 
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aiki

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i didn’t say i don’t desire Him at all, just that i don’t think i have a “deep, abiding desire” for Him. it’s more of a weak, faltering desire.

One has to start somewhere, right? Even if your desire is weak and faltering, it exists and can be nurtured into something greater. This is the case with many things we come to love. Jesus put it this way:

Matthew 6:21
21 for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.


We all have "treasure": time, energy and money. And Jesus says here that the more you invest your treasure in something, the more of your heart it will obtain. It's just the way God made us. So, then, if you want your heart to be with God, invest your treasure - your time, energy and money - in Him. As you you do, you will find your desire for God increasing and deepening.

This is, though, not the sole or primary way we come to love God. The apostle John wrote that we "love God because He first loved us." (1 John 4:19) In this statement, John draws out the relationship between our knowledge, and full trust in, God's love for us and our love for Him. If we are to love God well, we must know and be convinced of His incredible love for us. (1 John 4:16)

In regards to our love for Him, God has done for us as He must do in everything else in our walk with Him: He gives to us what it is He wants from us. And so, we read in Romans 5:5:

Romans 5:5 (NASB)
5 ...the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.


As Paul explained in Philippians 2:12-13, we work out in our lives as Christians only what God has first worked into us by the Holy Spirit. We love God with His own love, given to us in the Person of the Holy Spirit.

This transmission of the power and life of the Spirit happens, though, only as we are living in constant surrender to God as His bond-servant, His "slave of righteousness," submitted to Him throughout each day (Romans 6:13-22; Romans 12:1; James 4:7; 1 Peter 5:6). The Spirit does not impose Himself on you and I. He must be invited again and again to have control of us, in order to act to transform us into people in whom Jesus is clearly seen.

This, then, is the way every Christian comes to love God deeply and joyfully. That love may start small and shriveled, but as the things I've shared above are integrated into your life, your desire for God will enlarge and take root and give you great joy where only doubt and resistance presently exist.

there are some times when i barely desire a relationship with God at all, when i don’t want to pray or read the Bible or anything like that. maybe it’s laziness, maybe it’s avoiding God because i feel condemned, or maybe it’s because i really am condemned and don’t love God. i don’t know.

God sent His Son to the world so that you and I would not have to stand under condemnation:

John 3:17
17 For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved.

Romans 8:1
1 Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.


When anyone is saved, they are accepted by God, not because they have done so well in living right that God takes them in, but ONLY because they have trusted in Christ as their Saviour and Lord. God accepts us because, when we trust in Christ, the Holy Spirit comes to live within us, clothing us in Christ's perfect righteousness (Titus 3:5; Romans 8:9-14; 1 Corinthians 1:30; 1 Corinthians 6:19-20). And so, when God looks at you and I, He sees us in the righteousness of His Son and on this basis He accepts us. Never forget: It is ONLY on this basis that God accepts anyone. Your works, your ability to live righteously, have NOTHING to do with how you are saved or how you remain saved.

Ephesians 2:8-9
8 For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God;
9 not as a result of works, so that no one may boast.


2 Timothy 1:8-9
8 ...God,
9 who has saved us and called us with a holy calling, not according to our works, but according to His own purpose and grace which was granted us in Christ Jesus from all eternity,

Titus 3:4-7
4 But when the kindness of God our Savior and His love for mankind appeared,
5 He saved us, not on the basis of deeds which we have done in righteousness, but according to His mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewing by the Holy Spirit,
6 whom He poured out upon us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior,
7 so that being justified by His grace we would be made heirs according to the hope of eternal life.


So, then, God is not looking at you angrily, arms folded across His chest, and saying, "You've done it again, you lousy wretch! You've sinned again! I've about had it with you!" Not at all. Instead, He sees you robed in righteousness, the perfect righteousness of His Son and has declared you righteous, too, accepting you as one of His own. And since the righteousness of Christ is always perfect and always acceptable to God, you who are clothed in his righteousness are always acceptable to God also. As a result, the apostle Paul writes,

Romans 8:15
15 For you have not received a spirit of slavery leading to fear again, but you have received a spirit of adoption as sons by which we cry out, "Abba! Father!"


2 Timothy 1:7
7 For God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.


but it’s incredibly hard to shake that image of God away, to re-train my brain to view God as the loving, merciful Father that He is. and it’s also hard to feel like i can have a relationship with God because relationships largely involve emotion, which as i’ve mentioned is an area im not very gifted in (i’m on the autism spectrum).

God has made us all to be shaped by that upon which we focus. The more we think on a thing, the more power it has to shape who we are. This is the principle upon which advertising works. Companies spend billions every year on advertising because they recognize the great power of the "Principle of Conformity to Focus."

Because God has made us to be shaped to the thing upon which we dwell in our thinking, He never urges us to focus on our sin, or our own psychology, or the world around us. Instead, He commands us to "look unto Jesus" (Hebrews 12:2-3), to behold his glory (2 Corinthians 3:18) and as we do, God's Spirit works to make us like him (Philippians 2:13). So, stop looking at you, at your feelings of condemnation, of not measuring up, and look instead at your wonderful Saviour, at the awesome love of God for you, at the truth and light of God's word. Let these things fill your mind and heart and I guarantee that you will change, and grow, and come to delight in walking with God.

God doesn't offer you emotions in your walk with Him, but a changed life. Desire and emotion shouldn't be confused, by the way. You can desire something very powerfully without having high emotion about it. I already explained to you how this works in my last post.

When you start to go down the "I suck" road, tell yourself the truth from God's word. Memorize what God has said (see above) and use it to challenge the lies of self-condemnation that you've harbored in your thinking. You are right, however: This is a re-training process that takes time and persistence.

i’ve done so much introspection and self-examination since i became a Christian (assuming i ever did), but i’ve never been able to find a sure answer as to whether or not i’m saved.

You've been looking in the wrong place. The answers aren't within you, but in God and His truth.

Psalm 119:105
105 Your word is a lamp to my feet And a light to my path.


Psalm 1:1-3
1 How blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked, Nor stand in the path of sinners, Nor sit in the seat of scoffers!
2 But his delight is in the law of the LORD, And in His law he meditates day and night.
3 He will be like a tree firmly planted by streams of water, Which yields its fruit in its season And its leaf does not wither; And in whatever he does, he prospers.


Psalm 119:9-11
9 How can a young man keep his way pure? By keeping it according to Your word.
10 With all my heart I have sought You; Do not let me wander from Your commandments.
11 Your word I have treasured in my heart, That I may not sin against You.
 
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Lukaris

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In a basic sense, as the Lord illustrated ( Matthew 6:1-15), charity & prayer are closely linked. I remember seeing this in action with a street ministry group ( 4 square-Pentecostal) I volunteered a couple times with in the early 2000s. They offered a hearty cup of lentil soup & fruit punch to the poor in places like the Bronx ( it was good, healthy stuff). The ministry was not a hard sell approach & they talked to people. This is an example of what I mean when I am saying how prayer & charity work together.

To a lesser extent we can do this ourselves when we increase our sense of realization of what we hope for ourselves when we pray & give alms. While we cannot wish away hell, we can increase our sense of hope for ourselves & others. Taking care to avoid reckless speculations, we can attach our hopes to possibilities of the Lord’s mercy in ways He will determine ( Deuteronomy 29:29, Matthew 19:26 per Matthew 19:16-26).
 
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