That's not what I meant at all.
Hi NG. Thanks for clarifying, but this clarification does seem to make the issue more confused. I went back and had a look at some of your previous comments to try to get some context behind your frustration (i.e. the sigh). Your previous comments do seem to suggest that your frustration
is related to people saying that, at least in Christianity, you only get one shot, meaning that divorce is immoral. For example, in post #63 you said this:
It boggles my mind the way some Christians firmly believe that others in the Body should spend their entire lives lonely, involuntarily celibate, frustrated, longing for companionship and unfulfilled, because another person behaved in a way that caused a marriage to end. There are many reasons that marriages cannot work, many more than just adultery. Those who say things like "Well, unless your spouse cheated on you or died, you can't move on or love again or be with anyone else, ever, for the rest of your life, or you're an adulterer" are coming from a place of such cold, hard legalism that it's hard for me to comprehend. Again, why is the spouse left behind being punished for what the other person did?!
One quick clarification is that there is nothing in Jesus' teachings which suggests that a widow cannot remarry. The commitment is "'till death do us part". Paul did suggest that it would be
better for widows to not marry again, but he did not forbid it, either.
The other part of your comments is fairly concerning, though. A lot of people focus on that "except it be for fornication" part in Jesus' comments regarding marriage as a kind of loophole to justify divorce. Even that is pretty questionable considering Jesus also said, "what God has joined together, let no person put apart" specifically in the context of Moses allowing divorce, "for the hardness of their hearts". In other words, even if the issue is one of adultery, it's still pretty questionable and even
if divorce is permissible in that context, Jesus also makes it clear that remarriage definitely is not permissible.
But you've taken it much further by suggesting not only divorce, but remarriage is reasonable for any circumstance in which a couple no longer cares for one another, even if it's something as simple as just losing interest and, presumably, gaining interest in some other person.
There's no point in making a life long commitment to someone if you're concerned that you may get bored with them and want someone new in a few years.
I understand your concerns about being trapped in a marriage which doesn't work out. This is not a reason to complain against commitment, but rather to be far more cautious before getting married.
So many people, especially in America and other western countries, are taught to focus on the good feelings that come at the start of a romance. Because of these good feelings people tend to overlook warnings signs. As a result, years, or even months later, when the good feelings start to wear out, they see more clearly those problem areas they had previously ignored and then, as you've done in your comments, complain and lament about how they should not have to be trapped in a loveless relationship etc.
It is not wrong to enjoy strong feelings; that ability comes from God and it really can be a blessing, in the right context. The solution is to sort out compatibility first, before making an emotional commitment, and then you will see all the more clearly whether this person really is right for you in the long run.