Hey there,
I'm new here, so I apologize in advance if I'm doing anything wrong.
My wife and I are both saved and have been believers for some time now. But something happened recently that put us at a loss. Normally, I'd reach out to my Pastor, but we just moved and haven't found a new church yet.
A little bit of backstory (purely for context), my wife and I got married this year. The pandemic reeked havoc on our wedding plans and we had to split up our ceremony and our reception by several months. We had to cut down the ceremony to just family members due to the pandemic restrictions, meaning the majority of our wedding party was unable to attend. Fast forward to Sept. and we are preparing for our reception. We ask one of the groomsman in the wedding party if they will be attending. They said they wouldn't be. At the time we chalked it up to any number of reasons and gave them the benefit of the doubt. We are close with them and consider the groomsman in question and his wife to be our spiritual mentors.
My wanted a more definitive answer though and reached out to them afterward. They admitted the reason they hadn't come was because they felt convicted to not attend due to my mom's presence. A few years back, my mom cheated on my dad and ended up leaving our home church as a result. My mom and dad are still together and to my knowledge my mom hasn't stayed in her sin.
However, my wife and I were immensely hurt by this. We felt as though we were punished for something that we A) had no part in, and B) were actually victims of. It seemed, to us, that there was bitterness in them that was causing this. We brought our concerns before them as Matt. 18:15 says. They apologized for not discussing it sooner with us, but they didn't apologize for anything else. They cited Matt. 18:17 and 1 Cor. 9-11 as their main reasons for choosing not to come and celebrate with us of my mom.
This doesn't sit well with my wife and me. We felt that there would have been enough people present (many of them Christians as well) to allow them to avoid fellowshipping with her. The Bible also calls us to rejoice with those who rejoice and to weep with those who weep. My wife and I were celebrating a holy union that was created through God. Looking further past that though, the underlying implication is that they won't attend any significant life events (i.e. baby showers, vow renewals, weddings for my sisters, etc.) simply because my Mom will be there.
I was always under the assumption that 1 Cor. 5:9-11 was under the context of the Church, not life-related events like a wedding reception. The members of the Church are not to associate with a believer who wilfully lives in sin, in regard to the church body at large. Am I wrong in this assumption?
Are we (my wife and I) wrong for feeling this way? Did our friends make the godly and righteous call? Does not associating with immoral Christians supercede celebrating with and supporting other fellow believers?
Any clarity or insight on this matter is greatly appreciated. I apologize for the massive post.
I'm new here, so I apologize in advance if I'm doing anything wrong.
My wife and I are both saved and have been believers for some time now. But something happened recently that put us at a loss. Normally, I'd reach out to my Pastor, but we just moved and haven't found a new church yet.
A little bit of backstory (purely for context), my wife and I got married this year. The pandemic reeked havoc on our wedding plans and we had to split up our ceremony and our reception by several months. We had to cut down the ceremony to just family members due to the pandemic restrictions, meaning the majority of our wedding party was unable to attend. Fast forward to Sept. and we are preparing for our reception. We ask one of the groomsman in the wedding party if they will be attending. They said they wouldn't be. At the time we chalked it up to any number of reasons and gave them the benefit of the doubt. We are close with them and consider the groomsman in question and his wife to be our spiritual mentors.
My wanted a more definitive answer though and reached out to them afterward. They admitted the reason they hadn't come was because they felt convicted to not attend due to my mom's presence. A few years back, my mom cheated on my dad and ended up leaving our home church as a result. My mom and dad are still together and to my knowledge my mom hasn't stayed in her sin.
However, my wife and I were immensely hurt by this. We felt as though we were punished for something that we A) had no part in, and B) were actually victims of. It seemed, to us, that there was bitterness in them that was causing this. We brought our concerns before them as Matt. 18:15 says. They apologized for not discussing it sooner with us, but they didn't apologize for anything else. They cited Matt. 18:17 and 1 Cor. 9-11 as their main reasons for choosing not to come and celebrate with us of my mom.
This doesn't sit well with my wife and me. We felt that there would have been enough people present (many of them Christians as well) to allow them to avoid fellowshipping with her. The Bible also calls us to rejoice with those who rejoice and to weep with those who weep. My wife and I were celebrating a holy union that was created through God. Looking further past that though, the underlying implication is that they won't attend any significant life events (i.e. baby showers, vow renewals, weddings for my sisters, etc.) simply because my Mom will be there.
I was always under the assumption that 1 Cor. 5:9-11 was under the context of the Church, not life-related events like a wedding reception. The members of the Church are not to associate with a believer who wilfully lives in sin, in regard to the church body at large. Am I wrong in this assumption?
Are we (my wife and I) wrong for feeling this way? Did our friends make the godly and righteous call? Does not associating with immoral Christians supercede celebrating with and supporting other fellow believers?
Any clarity or insight on this matter is greatly appreciated. I apologize for the massive post.
