I Almost Started Vaping Today

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All the way through I was wondering about it and then you answerd the question...waiting for specialized trauma therapist. Substance abuse if often linked to trauma, particularly in childhood. I've had my own issues but wasnt a Christian then so did smoke, drink and use what I call recreational drugs too much. It was a way of coping with the effects of childhood problems. If you do have trauma issues its far better to deal with them than try to drown the out with smoking and alcohol. Addiction can often be linked to trauma.

As an ex-smoker I find smoking totally and utterly disgusting. It makes you smell, looks horrible, is extremely bad for your health and is very expensive. Best avoided. Although I do drink in moderation I wouldnt start now. I was delivered from addiction to both by God. The key to it was a meeting where the speaker challenged people with addiction issues that their desire for the substance was stronger than their desire for God. It certainly worked for me and many others to choose to desire God.

OP: Have you given your heart over to the Lord Jesus?

ACatholicRose said:

This is something that absolutely no one would ever expect from me, but vaping almost became a reality for me today. I've had strong cravings for cigarettes since I was six years old for some reason, and now I am 24 years old and the cravings are starting to feel uncontrollable. The cravings for alcohol have also been present in my life too, even though no one in my immediate family ever really drank alcohol.

In order to control these cravings, I pretend to smoke using writing pens or do the smoking motion with my fingers, and for the alcohol I just drink a lot of water when I feel the need to drink. I wish I could make the cravings go away, but they won't no matter what I do. If I ignore it, it gets worse. If I do the motions, it still gets worse. No matter what, I struggle with this pre-disposition to get into these substances and get addicted to them. That's why I have been avoiding alcohol and cigarettes like the plague for years. But every time I feel triggered to get into them, it only feels that much more difficult to resist it.

I almost went out to buy my first vape pen today, but I thank God that I told my sister about it beforehand because she begged me not to do it. I almost didn't care, but with what little strength that I had left, I took it to heart and fought the urges to smoke. What I did instead was walk and run with my dog, then I went to the grocery store to get myself some coffee and snacks that I would enjoy. I feel much better now as opposed to if I had begun smoking today. If I had started, I know I would have started the painful road to substance addiction as yet another way to avoid my stress and psychological wounds.

I think I need some serious help with this. Though I'm still waiting for a specialized trauma therapist to speak to, I think I might seek out my church's AA program for assistance, if they'll let me in for my strong urges.

Please pray for me, everyone. I know I'll need the Lord's help on this one. I cannot do this alone, and I know that. I have to put this in Christ's hands.

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I've read that beating yourself up over an addiction and indulging in feeling guilty reinforces an addiction. Since this is common human behavior, I would recommend to devise things to do instead of those activities if this is an issue for you.

ACatholicRose said:

This is something that absolutely no one would ever expect from me, but vaping almost became a reality for me today. I've had strong cravings for cigarettes since I was six years old for some reason, and now I am 24 years old and the cravings are starting to feel uncontrollable. The cravings for alcohol have also been present in my life too, even though no one in my immediate family ever really drank alcohol.

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You do know that if you do start that stopping will be very very hard? And that over the years and years you will be vaping you probably would have been able to afford some nice travel but for what you have spent on vaping. It's a rather dumb and rather one way kind of decision.

ACatholicRose said:

@( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Yes, I have discovered and embraced Jesus. That's why I'm giving this struggle to Jesus Christ and not just depending on my own willpower.

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What do you know of Jesus that gives you that assurance you're saved?

ACatholicRose said:

I know that it would be a dumb decision to vape or smoke anything. If I didn't know better, then would I be trying so hard for 18 years to not smoke? Intellectually, I know this stuff is bad for me. Acknowledging that is not the problem. The problem is not having an adequate support system OR good enough coping skills for the intense cravings that I've carried with me all my life. That's why I shared this on here.

@( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Yes, I have discovered and embraced Jesus. That's why I'm giving this struggle to Jesus Christ and not just depending on my own willpower.


Anyways, I decided to join my church's AA group and my area's Narcotics Anonymous group for peer support. I'll see if being in those support groups helps...

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Going to AA meetings will be an eye opener for you. Understanding how deeply addicted alcoholics are to alcohol is astounding. People who give up alcohol live one day at a time.

It can take years and years of continuous sobriety, before the addiction starts to wane. That is not a battle that I would ever wan't to go through.

I have known heroin addicts and alcoholics and they paid with their lives. They lived their lives with only one thought in their heads, how do I get my next hit. If you wan't a life controlled by just one thought pattern, then go ahead. But you will seriously regret your decision, I promise you.

ACatholicRose said:

This is something that absolutely no one would ever expect from me, but vaping almost became a reality for me today. I've had strong cravings for cigarettes since I was six years old for some reason, and now I am 24 years old and the cravings are starting to feel uncontrollable. The cravings for alcohol have also been present in my life too, even though no one in my immediate family ever really drank alcohol.

In order to control these cravings, I pretend to smoke using writing pens or do the smoking motion with my fingers, and for the alcohol I just drink a lot of water when I feel the need to drink. I wish I could make the cravings go away, but they won't no matter what I do. If I ignore it, it gets worse. If I do the motions, it still gets worse. No matter what, I struggle with this pre-disposition to get into these substances and get addicted to them. That's why I have been avoiding alcohol and cigarettes like the plague for years. But every time I feel triggered to get into them, it only feels that much more difficult to resist it.

I almost went out to buy my first vape pen today, but I thank God that I told my sister about it beforehand because she begged me not to do it. I almost didn't care, but with what little strength that I had left, I took it to heart and fought the urges to smoke. What I did instead was walk and run with my dog, then I went to the grocery store to get myself some coffee and snacks that I would enjoy. I feel much better now as opposed to if I had begun smoking today. If I had started, I know I would have started the painful road to substance addiction as yet another way to avoid my stress and psychological wounds.

I think I need some serious help with this. Though I'm still waiting for a specialized trauma therapist to speak to, I think I might seek out my church's AA program for assistance, if they'll let me in for my strong urges.

Please pray for me, everyone. I know I'll need the Lord's help on this one. I cannot do this alone, and I know that. I have to put this in Christ's hands.

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When I was a teen I was told to avoid drugs. The theory was something like smoking pot might lead to heroin addiction. I smoked and drank. It led to occasional drunkenness and yellow smoke stains on my fingers until I was begging God to help me quit these worthless toxins. Now I do not smoke and seldom drank alcohol. I saw a video about a Seventh a Day Adventist heart surgeon in Loma Linda, CA who lived to be 104. He said he did not smoke or drink alcohol. He was a vegan the second half of his life.

Vaping is a waste of time and money. Nicotine may also be the ruin of a person’s health as it is bad for the heart.

ACatholicRose said:

This is something that absolutely no one would ever expect from me, but vaping almost became a reality for me today. I've had strong cravings for cigarettes since I was six years old for some reason, and now I am 24 years old and the cravings are starting to feel uncontrollable. The cravings for alcohol have also been present in my life too, even though no one in my immediate family ever really drank alcohol.

In order to control these cravings, I pretend to smoke using writing pens or do the smoking motion with my fingers, and for the alcohol I just drink a lot of water when I feel the need to drink. I wish I could make the cravings go away, but they won't no matter what I do. If I ignore it, it gets worse. If I do the motions, it still gets worse. No matter what, I struggle with this pre-disposition to get into these substances and get addicted to them. That's why I have been avoiding alcohol and cigarettes like the plague for years. But every time I feel triggered to get into them, it only feels that much more difficult to resist it.

I almost went out to buy my first vape pen today, but I thank God that I told my sister about it beforehand because she begged me not to do it. I almost didn't care, but with what little strength that I had left, I took it to heart and fought the urges to smoke. What I did instead was walk and run with my dog, then I went to the grocery store to get myself some coffee and snacks that I would enjoy. I feel much better now as opposed to if I had begun smoking today. If I had started, I know I would have started the painful road to substance addiction as yet another way to avoid my stress and psychological wounds.

I think I need some serious help with this. Though I'm still waiting for a specialized trauma therapist to speak to, I think I might seek out my church's AA program for assistance, if they'll let me in for my strong urges.

Please pray for me, everyone. I know I'll need the Lord's help on this one. I cannot do this alone, and I know that. I have to put this in Christ's hands.

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Just a heads up, but you can vape zero nicotine ejuice... nicotine is the only thing in ejuice that is addictive, and the ejuice can be purchased without nicotine in it.. it's still not good for you in that inhaling any foreign substances isn't particularly healthy, but it wouldn't be addictive. You'd just have to buy open system vape gear that you can use your own ejuice with...

Here's my question though, what is leading you to have these cravings in the first place? It's rather odd really, since I take it you've never smoked.

Your 24 so your still young.. are you ADHD?

If so, do you drink coffee and get relief?

Sorry to ask, I know it's kind of airing your laundry, but to have such strong cravings without former use it's really just strange... I'd say getting to the bottom of what's causing it would be most helpful...

Have yiubever smoked, or vaped, or drank in excess.

A fortunate turn of events finally released me from my 45 or so year hiatus with cigarettes, and as hard as it was for me to quit prior to that, I feel very lucky.

At about 61 when I quit, I feel I hopfully got out just in time.

Please dont start, as you may never be able to stop.

Did you grow up with people who banged on about the dangers of drugs and alcohol and brought out the rebel in you or

ACatholicRose said:

The second quoted comment made me laugh, not gonna lie.

But in response to these questions, it's not so much a random desire to want to rebel or something, nor is it ADHD (which I do not have). This smoking craving seems to come up whenever I'm under a lot of stress, and the stress today was extreme. I spoke with a new therapist today about some previous sexual abuse, strongly hinting that it may have possibly been "commercial" sexual abuse, and that severely triggered me. Because the therapist left on an abrupt note with no proper containment of the conversation, it made me nearly have a complete breakdown (which, in my case, would have been a mixture of vaping and self harming in any other ways I could think of that wouldn't kill me).

But, uhh, yeah... Today was not the best day for me. But, you know what, it's all good. I'm ending my night on a positive note. I discovered a reasonable solution to today's issues by seeking out positive support groups and reviewing my support contacts too. I made contact with the support people and groups, and yeah... I'm just glad that I was able to make it through the day without doing something destructive. Y'all don't know just how close I got to losing my cool; and I never lose my cool to where other people can see it like my sister was able to blatantly see today.

I never ever want to go through the kind of experience that I had today ever again. That was pretty scary.

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PTSD is a likely cause for this then, but thats something your therapist would have to diagnose. Possibly Complex PTSD depending on what and when happened to you (and I do not want to know about that). I have suspected complex PTSD from violence I suffered as a child and I believe substance abuse is a common symptom. Forgive and move forward with your life.

For me, forgiveness starts with a choice to forgive, or to put it more accurately to how I see it, I choose not to hold on to unforgiveness, just let go.

Sounds easy doesnt it? Well it really is. Its a process. First time its hard, but the more you choose to let go of the unforgiveness the easier I found it to do. I pray about it and tell God that its my choice and to help we work through it. Every time it gets a bit easier. You may well pick up the unforgiveness for that person again. You dont lose the memories and emotions of what happened. But every time I just say I choose to forgive them and want to move forward from it. I now find it takes a lot of effort to hold on to unforgiveness for someone and that effort is tiring.

You have a desire, not a craving. You want to know what you don't know. For goodness sake, try to leave it at that. If you ever understand what it means to crave what you wish you didn't know, you will look back at this and laugh, or cry. But you will understand that they aren't the same.

ACatholicRose said:

This is something that absolutely no one would ever expect from me, but vaping almost became a reality for me today. I've had strong cravings for cigarettes since I was six years old for some reason, and now I am 24 years old and the cravings are starting to feel uncontrollable. The cravings for alcohol have also been present in my life too, even though no one in my immediate family ever really drank alcohol.

In order to control these cravings, I pretend to smoke using writing pens or do the smoking motion with my fingers, and for the alcohol I just drink a lot of water when I feel the need to drink. I wish I could make the cravings go away, but they won't no matter what I do. If I ignore it, it gets worse. If I do the motions, it still gets worse. No matter what, I struggle with this pre-disposition to get into these substances and get addicted to them. That's why I have been avoiding alcohol and cigarettes like the plague for years. But every time I feel triggered to get into them, it only feels that much more difficult to resist it.

I almost went out to buy my first vape pen today, but I thank God that I told my sister about it beforehand because she begged me not to do it. I almost didn't care, but with what little strength that I had left, I took it to heart and fought the urges to smoke. What I did instead was walk and run with my dog, then I went to the grocery store to get myself some coffee and snacks that I would enjoy. I feel much better now as opposed to if I had begun smoking today. If I had started, I know I would have started the painful road to substance addiction as yet another way to avoid my stress and psychological wounds.

I think I need some serious help with this. Though I'm still waiting for a specialized trauma therapist to speak to, I think I might seek out my church's AA program for assistance, if they'll let me in for my strong urges.

Please pray for me, everyone. I know I'll need the Lord's help on this one. I cannot do this alone, and I know that. I have to put this in Christ's hands.

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How the Lord is going to help on this one ?
This is what we have heard:
My eyes are ever toward the LORD, for He will pluck my feet out of the net. -Psalms 25:15

If you want your feet to pluck out of the net of addictions, you need to set always your eyes on the Lord.

Why David believe that he always sets his eyes that the Lord will deliver him out of Saul’s addiction to kill him ?

It is because of God’s promise that David trust. Do you trust the Lord’s help like David ?

Perhaps, you may wonder, how?
Listen to THIS:
ALL SCRIPTURE is BREATHED OUT BY GOD and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, -2 Timothy 3:16
that the man of God may be COMPLETE, EQUIPPED FOR EVERY GOOD WORK. -2 Timothy 3:17

So what David have heard, he wrote according to what the Holy Spirit inspires and the Holy Spirit inspires to help David, you and all of us who believe.

If you want to have a complete life, that is, filled with good work, it is not impossible! For God corrects those whom He loves. If you are seeking God’s help, you need to accept His correction of His love.

What the Lord have said to David, after David set his eyes on the Lord :

Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. -Psalms 25:16

It can be really lonely and afflicted when trapped in this net but there is hope !
Ask the Lord to turn to you ! How, you may say !

David have said THIS:
For when I KEPT SILENT, my bones WASTED AWAY THROUGH MY GROANING all day long. -Psalms 32:3
For day and night YOUR HAND WAS HEAVY UPON me; my strength was DRIED UP as by the heat of summer. Selah -Psalms 32:4

So David have told of his spiritual experience, that when he keep silent, that is, not praying to God or silent towards God; David felt his life wasted away and groaned ! Can you identify what David experience ?

Moreover, David identify the hand of God that was heavy upon him and not the hand of the enemies! When God is against him, David knew ! He explained that his strength was dried up ! Don’t you feel helpless like David and had no strength?

Have heard David speak THIS :
You who have made me SEE MANY TROUBLES AND CALAMITIES will revive me again; from the depths of the earth you will bring me up again. -Psalms 71:20
You will increase my greatness and comfort me again. -Psalms 71:21

After the Lord have made you see many troubles, failures, weaknesses and calamities! Can you say that the Lord will revive you again and increase your greatness and comfort you again ? Don’t be silent ! You know what David experiences when he is silent. Say it and trust the Lord will revive you again !

How you are going to be revived?
The answer is in the same chapter when David kept silent, realized his mistake and David have done this :

I acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, "I will confess my transgressions to the LORD," and you forgave the iniquity of my sin. Selah -Psalms 32:5

Why confess sin ? How will this help you ?
you desire the Lord for help and save you out of this addiction! Listen to THIS:

Behold, the LORD's HAND is not shortened, that it cannot SAVE, or his ear dull, that it cannot hear; -Isaiah 59:1
but your iniquities have made a separation between you and your God, and your sins have hidden his face from you so that HE DOES NOT HEAR. -Isaiah 59:2

If you want the Lord to hear asking for help ! If you want the Lord’s hand to save you !
You better pray daily acknowledging your sins in true contrition! Don’t conceal any guilt daily ! Start confessing your offenses !

What will that do or help ?
By acknowledging your offenses, you have humbled yourself before God. When you are humbled, the Lord gives His grace of repentance or the Lord gives strength for you to repent wholeheartedly or to save you out of your addiction and get back right in His relationship with Him !

As it is written in that same chapter :
Therefore let everyone who is godly offer prayer to you at a time when YOU MAY BE FOUND; surely in the rush of great waters, they shall NOT REACH him. -Psalms 32:6

Daily repentance brings you closer to God. Why ? You acknowledge His grace or that you trust in His steadfast love to rescue you !

As we have heard the Lord have spoken :
"Because he holds fast to me in love, I will deliver him; I will protect him, because he knows my name. -Psalms 91:14

If you do not pray that you repent wholeheartedly! It means that you don’t submit to God’s will. Those who resist God’s will, you know what has been said in the rush of great troubles waters will reach them !

Don’t let happen to you!
Set your eyes on the Lord’s paths, that is, grace and truth to those who keep His covenant and instructions.

Then ask the Lord to turn to you after you have prayer of repentance, He will show His favor and the Lord will bring you out of distress.

Remember the Lord consider your afflictions and sufferings and take all your sins away !!!

After you repent, call the Lord and tell Him THIS:
Consider how many are my foes, and with what violent hatred they hate me.
May integrity and uprightness preserve me, for I wait for you.
Redeem me, O God, out of all my troubles.
Amen (taken from Psalms 25:19-22)

You see, the Lord is working to save you out of the enemies’ net. How great is His righteousness to bring you out of distress ! How great is His steadfast love and compassion that He redeem you out of all your troubles !

I hope you come to the same conclusion as David and me, that is,

I sought the LORD, and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears. -Psalms 34:4

God do helps ! Give thanks to Him. For He is good. His grace continues forever.

Blessed be God. Every day He bears our burdens.God is our salvation. Amen

Stay strong! God bless you.