so many young adults living with parents

Paidiske

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A fixer upper in my area would be $200,000.

I really don't know enough about the American market to judge; I take it that's considered expensive?

(For comparison, that's about what we paid for our fixer-upper first home, almost twenty years ago now; and it was considered cheap in the city we were living in).
 
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Nithavela

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To be honest, I don't think everyone is suited to making a good living as an entrepreneur.

That said, from where I'm sitting (born 1980, so just on the cusp of Gen X/millennial) the angst about boomers isn't just about earning capacity. It's about workplace culture and attitudes as well (among other things). When capable, educated, qualified, experienced professionals of up to forty years old are consistently belittled, demeaned, undermined, and so on by boomer-aged workplace gatekeepers and the like, it does give rise to the temptation to bitterness.

I also think, @christine40, that the idea of buying a fixer-upper and doing the work on it yourselves depends on having the knowledge, skills and resources to do that work, and not everyone does.
Mind you that "resources" also include time and energy. If you're already working two jobs to keep afloat and maybe even have a child, you just don't have the time or energy for much DIY.

"Who needs sleep when you're young" my foot.
 
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bèlla

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To be honest, I don't think everyone is suited to making a good living as an entrepreneur.

Paidiske,

No, everyone isn’t suited to entrepreneurship. You need discipline and perseverance. But the bar to entry has never been lower. Digital entrepreneurship eliminated the gatekeepers and opened up the playing field. Start up expenses are low as is the overhead. It requires hunger and a willingness to work. Most begin as side hustles founders operate while working full-time.

People LOVE to complain. They bemoan this and that and never do anything about it. I’m a problem-solver. Not a problem recounter. I like results. Discussion is fine but at the end of the day action is required.

The bottom line is simple. You don’t own it. That’s isn’t your name on the door. For the security of a paycheck you endure certain hardships. That’s the price of convenience. You can tell me how it should be. But should isn’t fact.

I value autonomy and financial independence. And most importantly, my peace of mind. I don’t have time for office politics or water cooler drama. If it means working 7 days per week I’ll do it. If it requires no vacations for a time that’s okay.

I won’t be subject or nickeled and dimed. You’ll never be paid what you’re worth. Capitalism never gives the bee its due. Unless you’re at the top of the food chain you’ll always come up short.

When I was in college I worked for the government. We had a speaker who did a presentation on diversity. But that wasn’t the crux of the discussion. He didn’t tell us how to thrive in corporate america. Not exactly. He helped us understand the nature of ascension and what you need to do to scale in any environment.

That message was like manna. It lit a fire inside of me that would eventually become my exodus. I never forgot what he said. He told us the game has existed before the beginning of time. Many have tried to change the game and failed. If you play the game you must be lone X in a sea of O’s. Someone above you must recognize your difference to move higher.

I almost leapt out of my seat. I knew where he was going. The materials provided a roadmap for the summit. The crowd was excited and he ended on this note. Your question isn’t whether you’re in the game. You must decide if you’re going to play the game or get out. That was my tipping point.

“Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day; teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.”

I chose the road less traveled. :)

Yours in His Service,

~Bella
 
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Paidiske

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Paidiske,

No, everyone isn’t suited to entrepreneurship. You need discipline and perseverance. But the bar to entry has never been lower. Digital entrepreneurship eliminated the gatekeepers and opened up the playing field. Start up expenses are low as is the overhead. It requires hunger and a willingness to work. Most begin as side hustles founders operate while working full-time.

People LOVE to complain. They bemoan this and that and never do anything about it. I’m a problem-solver. Not a problem recounter. I like results. Discussion is fine but at the end of the day action is required.

The bottom line is simple. You don’t own it. That’s isn’t your name on the door. For the security of a paycheck you endure certain hardships. That’s the price of convenience. You can tell me how it should be. But should isn’t fact.

I value autonomy and financial independence. And most importantly, my peace of mind. I don’t have time for office politics or water cooler drama. If it means working 7 days per week I’ll do it. If it requires no vacations for a time that’s okay.

I won’t be subject or nickeled and dimed. You’ll never be paid what you’re worth. Capitalism never gives the bee its due. Unless you’re at the top of the food chain you’ll always come up short.

When I was in college I worked for the government. We had a speaker who did a presentation on diversity. But that wasn’t the crux of the discussion. He didn’t tell us how to thrive in corporate america. Not exactly. He helped us understand the nature of ascension and what you need to do to scale in any environment.

That message was like manna. It lit a fire inside of me that would eventually become my exodus. I never forgot what he said. He told us the game has existed before the beginning of time. Many have tried to change the game and failed. If you play the game you must be lone X in a sea of O’s. Someone above you must recognize your difference to move higher.

I almost leapt out of my seat. I knew where he was going. The materials provided a roadmap for the summit. The crowd was excited and he ended on this note. Your question isn’t whether you’re in the game. You must decide if you’re going to play the game or get out. That was my tipping point.

“Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day; teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.”

I chose the road less traveled. :)

Yours in His Service,

~Bella

There's truth to all of this, but I think it reduces the workplace to for-profit businesses, and working, to what you earn.

Many - perhaps even a majority of us, I'm having difficulty finding good statistics - don't work in the for-profit sector. Government, non-profits, and purpose-based employers are huge. In that environment, the motivation isn't about maximising how much you can be paid (although everyone needs to survive).

When I said that not everyone was suited to entrepreneurship, I wasn't just talking about things like discipline and perseverance. Those are character traits which can be developed. I would - for example - be a miserable entrepreneur because I don't want my life to be about chasing money.
 
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bèlla

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When I said that not everyone was suited to entrepreneurship, I wasn't just talking about things like discipline and perseverance. Those are character traits which can be developed. I would - for example - be a miserable entrepreneur because I don't want my life to be about chasing money.

Paidiske,

You would make a good employer and that's a big part of it. You have no interest in exploiting people. You'd pay a living wage and be kind to your employees. They're aren't enough people who'd do the same. People who see beyond profits and remember they're dealing with human beings. :)

Yours in His Service,

~Bella
 
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Paidiske

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Paidiske,

You would make a good employer and that's a big part of it. You have no interest in exploiting people. You'd pay a living wage and be kind to your employees. They're aren't enough people who'd do the same. People who see beyond profits and remember they're dealing with human beings. :)

Yours in His Service,

~Bella

That may be true, but I have no desire to build a business to the point where I would be employing others! Leadership in the church is probably a better pathway to that sort of oversight of others, for me. :)
 
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Trogdor the Burninator

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There's lot of reasons young adults are staying home longer. I'll list a few:-
  • The decline in blue collar jobs that pay decent wages
  • Decline in apprenticeship numbers as a gateway to those jobs
  • Higher proportion of jobs concentrated in major international cities
  • Population movement into those cities forcing up house prices and rents
  • A higher proportion of immigrants in those cities who often don't share the "kick the kids out of home" philosophy
  • Increasing college/university fees
  • Decline in part-time permanent jobs in favour of gig economy jobs
Quite frankly, the landscape faced by someone turning 21 today and looking to leave home is very different to that which greeted me as a Gen X-er.
 
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Trogdor the Burninator

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I see what it does to parents such as my 60 + neighbor
she is seriously stressed plus said the almost 30 yr olds w/o jobs do nothing to help out

should people close to retirement age be supporting adults kids?
everyone loves their kids but they have to move out sometime....

I think your issue seems to be more with your neighbours kids than people not moving out in their early 20s.

I went to a Chinese church and I can assure you - it was very unusual for people to move out under 25, and most of us didn't leave until their late 20s/early 30s. The idea of kicking the kids out at 21 was completely foreign.

But of course, the family dynamics are quite different, and the kids would certainly be helping at home, so....
 
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Trogdor the Burninator

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I hate to break it to you - but you've got the wrong generation. The generation who sent kids to Vietnam, oversaw decades of environmental vandalism and ushered in the era of public asset selloffs and mass privatisation weren't the Boomers, but were in fact the same generation who fought in WW2, or those born during the depression.

The people who were the first to protest those things were in fact - Boomers.

That's not to say Boomers get off scot-free, but if you want to aim some hate at a generation for mucking things up, the uncomfortable truth is you need to go after others first.
 
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bèlla

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I went to a Chinese church and I can assure you - it was very unusual for people to move out under 25, and most of us didn't leave until their late 20s/early 30s. The idea of kicking the kids out at 21 was completely foreign.

Trogdor,

My family was the same way. They didn't leave home until marriage and weren't forced from the nest if it didn't occur. We're not Asian but there's a strong ethos of supporting one another in times of need and plenty.

La famille est tout is my philosophy and the credo that expresses our ideals. My daughter lives at home but I don't charge her rent. But she assists in other ways. We're developing qualities and skills that will serve her when she marries and has a family.

I don't share the OP's idea of struggle or going without. I want my descendants to have everything I have and more. That's what I'm working towards. When every one does their thing the collective suffers. The unit must prevail.

Yours in His Service,

~Bella
 
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*LILAC

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I have no problem with my kids being home until they buy a house. Not rent. Buy. We (hubby and I) rented and it was the hugest waste of money, so with them being home they help pay bills and other home projects that need doing. I'd rather they save up their money now, than to regret wasting it on renting later and needing a place to live until a down payment is actually saved. Just get it all done on the first time around.
 
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*LILAC

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Parents willing to accept a sexual relationship under their roofs for their adult married or unmarried children has dramatically increased as well. This has also lead to kids having less interest in getting out on their own.
I've told my kids that they aren't allowed to bring anyone home unless it's their future spouse. That seems to be something we all readily agree on, seeing how society is these days.
 
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cow451

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I mean that Boomers have no idea how much Millennials hate them. And pretty soon, we'll be making healthcare decisions for them.

Sleep well, Boomers.
I love Boomers. They are so charming, intelligent, thrifty, honest, dependable, caring, charitable and respectful.
 
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CRAZY_CAT_WOMAN

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I love Boomers. They are so charming, intelligent, thrifty, honest, dependable, caring, charitable and respectful.
Yes . I've never heard about Millennials or any people hating the Boomers.
 
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cow451

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Yes . I've never heard about Millennials or any people hating the Boomers.
Well, being one, I can attest to how beloved I am by the ones wanting power of attorney for me.
 
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bèlla

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I've told my kids that they aren't allowed to bring anyone home unless it's their future spouse. That seems to be something we all readily agree on, seeing how society is these days.

Lilac,

I'm not opposed to meeting the gentlemen expressing interest in my daughter. But we have protocols for doing so. I don't want a fleet of men traipsing through my home. Meeting the family is an integral part of the dating process. But the groundwork should be laid to assess character and suitability before reaching that point. I broach this in stages.

Stage 1: Shared meal in a public venue. It allows each to develop familiarity without the pressure and expectations "going home" implies. This will be lunch or brunch.

Stage 2: Second meeting in a public space or event. Lunch or breakfast.

Stage 3: Invitation to dinner.

My home is my sanctuary. Invitations are personal and dinner is intimate. I have to be comfortable with the people sitting around my table. I like authentic relationships and discourse. By the time someone comes over you should have an idea where the connection is going. There should be no ambiguity at that point.

Some families do this sooner. But I'm single. I have to exercise common sense and propriety for my welfare and hers. :)

Yours in His Service,

~Bella
 
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