Do you think Abraham took JOY in binding Isaac?
That's the difference. You are commanded to sing, whether you enjoy it or not. You do it out of obedience, whether you enjoy it or not. For me, singing is like binding Isaac, I do it because the Lord commands, but I take no joy in it.
Being willing to obey, and enjoying something, are 2 different things, they are not always connected. I don't think any Jew enjoyed circumcising their sons and I know for fact having worked in L&D and NICU in a hospital that the babies do not enjoy it.
I'm quite sure that as an adult, Abraham did not enjoy his circumcision. He obeyed, but I'm sure it wasn't joyful.
When we're told to "count it all joy" I don't think that James is telling us to be masochists. Rather that the end result of being tempted, being tried, chastisement, persecution, is a better you and better outcome in eternity, not that that persecution, trial, chastisement, and temptation and sin are joyful experiences themselves.
In fact we're to endure tribulation, and even lay down our lives, that itself is not joyful, that's being willing to endure something painful and miserable, in obedience to God.
Not all things that God commands us to do are joyful for everyone.
Again, it seems you have a problem with what the Bible says or with God's instructions. For it is written:
“Let thy priests be clothed with righteousness; and let thy saints shout for joy.” (Psalms 132:9).
“Break forth into joy, sing together, ye waste places of Jerusalem: for the LORD hath comforted his people, he hath redeemed Jerusalem.” (Isaiah 52:9).
“Behold, my servants shall sing for joy of heart,...” (Isaiah 65:14).
Singing is a part of the faith.
Paul continued in the presence with the Philippian brethren so as to further the joy of their faith.
“And having this confidence, I know that I shall abide and continue with you
all for your furtherance and joy of faith;” (Philippians 1:25).
The apostle John writes to the brethren so that their joy may be full.
“And these things write we unto you, that your joy may be full.” (1 John 1:4).
Obviously if singing is a part of the faith, there has to come a point where our joy is full no matter what we are doing for the Lord. Besides, Christians are to glory or rejoice even amongst situations that they don't like or that are hard.
“And not only
so, but we glory in tribulations...” (Romans 5:3).
Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:10).
“But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ's sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.” (1 Peter 4:13).