ChristServant,
“Unless the LORD builds the house, those who build it labor in vain.” —Psalm 127:1
The question has been debated many times and will remain a source of contention. We realize all marriages weren’t undertaken through the Lord’s direction. Nor has every couple sought counsel from mature Christians to aid their discernment.
“The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice.” —Proverbs 12:15
Therefore, we’ll have a selection of unions whose entry wasn’t God’s directive or the result of sound counsel. Many began as works of the flesh driven by mental and emotional reasoning. Neither are comparable to spiritual discernment or wisdom.
Some relationships are capable of moving beyond the starting point and developing fruit through maturity and mutual effort. Others are beset by wants and dissatisfactions which prevent the pair from working together. Many choose dissolution when that occurs.
If we desire a different outcome we cannot utilize the same recipe and expect a new beginning. We’ll inevitably return to the former place. The wrapping may differ but the core remains unchanged.
“The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps.” —Proverbs 16:9
The solution is getting on God’s page. We begin through prayer and submission. Its forged in relationship and surrender. If we’re unaccustomed to yielding in the simple; how will we handle bigger requests? If you don’t embrace His directives in less important areas. How will you align yourself with His prompting for a partner? You’ll miss it or go your own way.
We needn’t debate the institution in itself. It was built for permanency. That should inform our approach and hasten our steps to some degree. We shouldn’t rely on emotions or having our wants met.
“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” —Ephesians 5:25
“Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct.” —1 Peter 3:1-2
The first consideration is emulation of the Source. How does the union mimic the qualities articulated in the word? Is there evident examples of love, sacrifice and respect from both? Is servanthood the greater aim or personal fulfillment?
“House and wealth are inherited from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the Lord.” —Proverbs 19:14
When contemplating a connection with someone who failed in marriage. You must determine if they recognize where they erred. Did they accept responsibility for their mistakes and repent? Or is the other the culprit and they’re wholly innocent?
“And the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” —Mark 10:8-9
Given the gravity of involvement for each; prayer and fasting should follow. You must seek the Lord’s will beforehand. The challenge for most is the possibility that God will say no. They forgo the inquiry and proceed.
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.“ —Proverbs 3:4-5
Yours in His Service,
~Bella
