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Biblical and other support for those Hurting badly!

Jeshu

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This is the deepest truth i found to be true within myself and that was that Jesus came and befriended me the suffering one. i had suffered myself in wicked deeds all my life. i had repented ten thousand times for the things i did when i was led by the wicked. i had always agonised them living in my heart. And in that self I hated hated myself in my suffering self a weakling.

True i had also self where I had feasted with the wicked in the past. In my big egocentric self I turned out to be the son of lawlessness in disguise. Jesus cut him out of me showing me my sins and misery for 7 years in the pit without any faith in His love. It was hell come true down there. I hated myself and condemned myself to death down there. In those selves I did not receive faith to get away from the power of the wicked. When sin was washed off me in such thinking and feeling I was washed off along with it. Time and again until the word preached its verdict over me.

Ezekiel 24:1-24
In the ninth year, in the tenth month on the tenth day, the word of the Lord came to me: “Son of man, record this date, this very date, because the king of Babylon has laid siege to Jerusalem this very day. Tell this rebellious people a parable and say to them: ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says:


“‘Put on the cooking pot; put it on
and pour water into it.
Put into it the pieces of meat,
all the choice pieces—the leg and the shoulder.
Fill it with the best of these bones;
take the pick of the flock.
Pile wood beneath it for the bones;
bring it to a boil
and cook the bones in it.



“‘For this is what the Sovereign Lord says:

“‘Woe to the city of bloodshed,
to the pot now encrusted,
whose deposit will not go away!
Take the meat out piece by piece
in whatever order it comes.



“‘For the blood she shed is in her midst:
She poured it on the bare rock;
she did not pour it on the ground,
where the dust would cover it.
To stir up wrath and take revenge
I put her blood on the bare rock,
so that it would not be covered.



“‘Therefore this is what the Sovereign Lord says:

“‘Woe to the city of bloodshed!
I, too, will pile the wood high.
So heap on the wood
and kindle the fire.
Cook the meat well,
mixing in the spices;
and let the bones be charred.
Then set the empty pot on the coals
till it becomes hot and its copper glows,
so that its impurities may be melted
and its deposit burned away.
It has frustrated all efforts;
its heavy deposit has not been removed,
not even by fire.



“‘Now your impurity is lewdness. Because I tried to cleanse you but you would not be cleansed from your impurity, you will not be clean again until my wrath against you has subsided.


“‘I the Lord have spoken. The time has come for me to act. I will not hold back; I will not have pity, nor will I relent. You will be judged according to your conduct and your actions, declares the Sovereign Lord.’”


i never realised that this is what would happen but I utterly perished in my dishonest, prideful, arrogant, selfish, doubting and unbelieving self. So when i saw those so strong in lies die like flies with the dragon ruling, i knew that Revelation was really coming true right inside my heart for i saw all the numbered died like flies! My oppressors. The very self I had been in sin. (Isaiah 57:3-4) That self in me in which I had caused me all my heart ache was destroyed by Jesus Christ in the desert of my desolation suicidally depressed. Who could have foretold that Jesus knew me that intimately and could punish that severely?


Who could have foretold He would come to my aid in such manner? Bringing me rock bottom and collecting me in my true self for such can withstand the battle of lies. True self is indestructible, Jesus made sure of that. Only in my untrue self i suffered death as penalty. Truly i had not realised a religious person that election is of the heart and not just of people.

This has been the best part of my walk with Jesus. How Scripture/truth comes alive inside my inner world of being because loving God and neighbour saves me from my sins like nothing else does.

Honest this is how my life used to be from righteous moments to unrighteous moments all day long. From having faith to not having any faith at all. From serving God with zeal to hating Him for forbidding me my fun. From loving true to stampeding all over love a loveless sinner.

However now can live united as one within myself and glory in God for untrue self has been sliced off, literally like that!

Hebrews 4:12-13 did warn me about that but i had forgotten to take note until it happened.

"For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account."

And so He set me free to love Him and neighbour and to grow stronger than my illness can throw at me. All praise to God for saving me out of my pit.

Peace.
 
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Jeshu

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Good Enough In Christ.
i kept hearing voices in my head
saying i was not good enough
It never dawned on me
to get rid of wicked thrash
Until Jesus came with His Sword
cutting the wicked down
with the truth of His mouth
He set me free from those voices.

For God so loved this fallen world
That He send His only begotten Son
to suffer and die for our sins.
So that whosoever believes in Him
shall not perish but have eternal life.
This is the promise He gave me.
My life in Him will be from Above!
i have full confidence in Him.

 
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Jeshu

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So in our by the wicked oppressed selves we find the chosen. Those parts of ourself, where often time we have been hated for who and what we are, were we suffered life. Oh how could i have known that God knew all about suffering? And that He has an awesome way to deal with it - love suffering to death by displacing the wicked and not heeding them any more.

Sure the wicked make a lot of commotion when we do that. They have the loud mouths, and the mean streaks, those things which embarrassed us. Yet in deed we are saved from our sin, an amazing reality were we the guilty are washed clean of the guilt that sticks to us, while the wicked are exposed as the evildoers behind it all. Casting them all dead with His love! The blood of Christ truly saves.

However salvation doesn't come cheap, it took the life of our beloved Lord to ransom it. Fighting the wicked we soon realise that on our own we stand no chance. Only the ability of our Lord can get us past the Dragon. The fire of His baptism sure is a clear example of how Victorious Christ has truly been. The wicked don't die easy. They hang on tooth and nail. If they loose their footing in our hearts then they go to eternal fire they freak that! And rightly so, God's wrath is no joke. Just ask Jesus about that!

So if you are fighting the wicked casting guilt, shame and fear (or should i say terror?), accusing you of wrong, denying you the right to the blood of the Lamb. Honest love them all away. Love God for grace and love people for being in His image and forgive those who have wronged you. If you do that your sins will get washed off as well. You can be assured of that.

Learning to love true 100 percent of the time, like He does, is very hard indeed, and we can only make moments of that in our lives down here, but how worthy are those moments were He finds birth in us? Each time we actively put our faith in God's love we win another battle and grow stronger to fight the enemy.

So if you are suffering please put your faith in God's love, our Lord Jesus Christ, love God and neighbour and He will come and make His dwelling within you, guiding you Home.
 
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Jeshu

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The best part of being written into the Word is when we meet famous Scriptural pieces like this in our lives. Honest after Ezekiel exposed the lewdness of my wilful sin, and the great desolation caused by the abomination i had been serving, that dragon accuser, did clean away with that lawless spirituality in me. Then The Lord came upon me through Ezekiel 36. Now the mountains of Israel are the high places we have our alters of worship on. Elevated moods in our faith life were we celebrate our faith in God, or our idols.

It was The Lord's doing that got me a clean heart! He washed me with clean water and put His Spirit within me, despite my sinful past.

Oh the hope that rekindled in my heart when i saw the Lord sanctify faithful believers in me. i truly arose from the dead. All the hopes i had lost as a believer rekindled and came to life once more. It was absolutely awesome to see Ezekiel preach to my soul and past life being restored.

Ezekiel 37
The hand of the Lord was on me, and he brought me out by the Spirit of the Lord and set me in the middle of a valley; it was full of bones. He led me back and forth among them, and I saw a great many bones on the floor of the valley, bones that were very dry. He asked me, “Son of man, can these bones live?”

I said, “Sovereign Lord, you alone know.”


Then he said to me, “Prophesy to these bones and say to them, ‘Dry bones, hear the word of the Lord! This is what the Sovereign Lord says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life. I will attach tendons to you and make flesh come upon you and cover you with skin; I will put breath in you, and you will come to life. Then you will know that I am the Lord.’”


So I prophesied as I was commanded. And as I was prophesying, there was a noise, a rattling sound, and the bones came together, bone to bone. I looked, and tendons and flesh appeared on them and skin covered them, but there was no breath in them.


Then he said to me, “Prophesy to the breath; prophesy, son of man, and say to it, ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says: Come, breath, from the four winds and breathe into these slain, that they may live.’” So I prophesied as he commanded me, and breath entered them; they came to life and stood up on their feet—a vast army.


Then he said to me: “Son of man, these bones are the people of Israel. They say, ‘Our bones are dried up and our hope is gone; we are cut off.’ Therefore prophesy and say to them: ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says: My people, I am going to open your graves and bring you up from them; I will bring you back to the land of Israel. Then you, my people, will know that I am the Lord, when I open your graves and bring you up from them. I will put my Spirit in you and you will live, and I will settle you in your own land. Then you will know that I the Lord have spoken, and I have done it, declares the Lord.’”


The word of the Lord came to me: “Son of man, take a stick of wood and write on it, ‘Belonging to Judah and the Israelites associated with him.’ Then take another stick of wood, and write on it, ‘Belonging to Joseph (that is, to Ephraim) and all the Israelites associated with him.’ Join them together into one stick so that they will become one in your hand.


“When your people ask you, ‘Won’t you tell us what you mean by this?’ say to them, ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says: I am going to take the stick of Joseph—which is in Ephraim’s hand—and of the Israelite tribes associated with him, and join it to Judah’s stick. I will make them into a single stick of wood, and they will become one in my hand.’ Hold before their eyes the sticks you have written on and say to them, ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says: I will take the Israelites out of the nations where they have gone. I will gather them from all around and bring them back into their own land. I will make them one nation in the land, on the mountains of Israel. There will be one king over all of them and they will never again be two nations or be divided into two kingdoms. They will no longer defile themselves with their idols and vile images or with any of their offenses, for I will save them from all their sinful backsliding, and I will cleanse them. They will be my people, and I will be their God.


“‘My servant David will be king over them, and they will all have one shepherd. They will follow my laws and be careful to keep my decrees. They will live in the land I gave to my servant Jacob, the land where your ancestors lived. They and their children and their children’s children will live there forever, and David my servant will be their prince forever. I will make a covenant of peace with them; it will be an everlasting covenant. I will establish them and increase their numbers, and I will put my sanctuary among them forever. My dwelling place will be with them; I will be their God, and they will be my people. Then the nations will know that I the Lord make Israel holy, when my sanctuary is among them forever.’”



To live the truth is absolutely amazing and so comforting. For at times when my faith was dim, then The Holy Spirit would gently remind me of those times and carry me through such deserted places in my heart.

The best part was when Jesus restored unity in my faithful believer self with the rest of myself, which in my religious mode i had cut off from deeming them less elect than i was. You know what i mean? Like when we try not to be like this or that because other Christians taught us that such was wrong. i had so much divided faith, just like the Christian Church is, was my heart on the inside. Yet Jesus united my whole being back into one and gave me vision of the future that was completely written in God's word.

And so Psalm 86:11-13 came true for me as well when my heart prayed these words being completely one with it.

"Teach me your way, Lord,
that I may rely on your faithfulness;
give me an undivided heart,
that I may fear your name.
I will praise you, Lord my God, with all my heart;
I will glorify your name forever.
For great is your love toward me;
you have delivered me from the depths,
from the realm of the dead.
"


The more love for God grew in my heart, the more i sought Him out as my Saviour and redeemer. i was struggling big sin in my life, so much destruction the wicked had wrought in me, i had been their victim for so long. Yet destruction in my bad life had been decreed by God Himself. i knew that sin had no chance and that my best efforts at not sinning where not needed to get to the final result. Jesus Spirit, it was Him i had to follow. i had to internalise His voice and let His truth reshape my fallen heart.

It took some time for me the desolate to be comforted. i had lost so much. i had suffered so severely at the hands of the wicked. Sure it had been my own sin that court up with me and had laid me waste, yet i was so ill. 7 years in the pit is no joke. Still Scripture brought me a new perspective when i crowned love for God as my Zion.

Isaiah 54
“Sing, barren woman,
you who never bore a child;
burst into song, shout for joy,
you who were never in labor;
because more are the children of the desolate woman
than of her who has a husband,”
says the Lord.
“Enlarge the place of your tent,
stretch your tent curtains wide,
do not hold back;
lengthen your cords,
strengthen your stakes.
For you will spread out to the right and to the left;
your descendants will dispossess nations
and settle in their desolate cities.



“Do not be afraid; you will not be put to shame.
Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated.
You will forget the shame of your youth
and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood.
For your Maker is your husband—
the Lord Almighty is his name—
the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer;
he is called the God of all the earth.
The Lord will call you back
as if you were a wife deserted and distressed in spirit—
a wife who married young,
only to be rejected,” says your God.
“For a brief moment I abandoned you,
but with deep compassion I will bring you back.
In a surge of anger
I hid my face from you for a moment,
but with everlasting kindness
I will have compassion on you,”
says the Lord your Redeemer.



“To me this is like the days of Noah,
when I swore that the waters of Noah would never again cover the earth.
So now I have sworn not to be angry with you,
never to rebuke you again.
Though the mountains be shaken
and the hills be removed,
yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken
nor my covenant of peace be removed,”
says the Lord, who has compassion on you.



“Afflicted city, lashed by storms and not comforted,
I will rebuild you with stones of turquoise,
your foundations with lapis lazuli.
I will make your battlements of rubies,
your gates of sparkling jewels,
and all your walls of precious stones.
All your children will be taught by the Lord,
and great will be their peace.
In righteousness you will be established:
Tyranny will be far from you;
you will have nothing to fear.
Terror will be far removed;
it will not come near you.
If anyone does attack you, it will not be my doing;
whoever attacks you will surrender to you.



“See, it is I who created the blacksmith
who fans the coals into flame
and forges a weapon fit for its work.
And it is I who have created the destroyer to wreak havoc;
no weapon forged against you will prevail,
and you will refute every tongue that accuses you.
This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord,
and this is their vindication from me,”
declares the Lord.


This is the power faith in God's love brought me reading Scripture as a personal address from God to the world of my inner being. Growing in truth grew me love, the more truth grew in my heart the more love for God kindled.

We serve an absolutely awesome God.:amen:
 
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Jeshu

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Light in My Darkness
So small seem i to be,
while accuser grills my sin.
A worm is what i see,
sadness grieves within.

Cut of from my good life,
i falter to a halt.
All this inner strife,
i'm no good, i'm told.

Up above seems shut,
as my tears run free.
Sadness inside to cut,
that bleeding heart in me.

Waiting for Him to appear,
to aid me down in this hole.
Knowing i need not fear,
Jesus wont loose my soul.

Even as accuser smears me my sin
The Lord's blood keeps me clean
i know in Him the battle i will win
On His promises over me i lean.

Please Lord be with those so sore,
those stuck with their despair.
Your love bringing so much more,
when fallen lives are in Your care.

i love to see those hurting sin,
Washed clean by your love.
i know with You they can win,
and be comforted from above.



 
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Junia

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Within four years from suicidal depression Jesus made me able to deal with my pain - though my depressive spells have proven to be basically untreatable - yet now it doesn't matter so much any more.


A poem a wrote about the time Jesus came and got me away from my misery.


:wave:


The Beggar Of My Existence

Begging I lay beside the road, unable to get-up or move on.
Paralysed after a viscous assault when I was just a little kid
bloodied I stared at my wretched existence for many years.
Hope had gone, pain throbbing, hungry and thirsty, cold and alone,
the inner demons dragging me deeper and deeper down the drain,
helpless the wicked abused my life, robbing me of all my possessions.

Most of my life I lay there beside the road alone
I don't know how I survived my miserable existence,
by-passers often bashed me, blaming me for their hate.
At first I was raped night after night for years,
lately mainly tortured for cruel fun and cheap thrills,
oh yes, those wicked ones have been hurting me!

Not often have peels been part of my diet,
weeds, grass, rotten fruit and insects,
that's what I ate, such meagre meals.
I was skin over bones and smelled like sewage.
Walking dead, longing for an early ending.
I didn't feel worthy to carry the name human.

Suddenly I became aware of a pleasant aroma,
a beautifully perfumed visitor, a rich stranger,
he knelt beside beside me and took hold of me
I thought, maybe he'll give me something worthwhile,
I'd better ask quickly before he goes on his way,
normally the rich don't ever stop to talk to me!

Facing the visitor I croaked through parched lips,
please? I am unable to move and very hungry,
my last visitor abused me and I'm hurting bad,
could you spare me some food or money,
a sip of water, I'm so thirsty right now?
Expectantly I looked up into the man's eyes.

Chewing delicious bread I stared at the stranger,
the young wine had refreshed me completely
where did all this come from I wonder?
My taste-buds were in Heaven and so was I
I couldn't believe what I was hearing
I remember his lips pronounce the words;

"Shalom... Beloved...

..You're most welcome, my child," he said,
"Eat your fill, here, have another sip of wine,
your clothes are all worn, dirty and broken.
At home I have some new clean garments your size,
a warm bath and a place of safety and rest,
awaiting my dwelling-place high-up New Eden street."

That's what he said, and that's what he did for me!
Amazed I watched as out of nowhere servants arrived,
gently lifting me out of my grime and of the street,
carrying me along an all together different route,
right to the top of a most beautiful mountain hill,
halting before a mansion I didn't know could exist.

A doctor came and tended my wounds and sores
ointments soothing, smelling like fragrant herbs
a massage, gently, carefully rejuvenating me.
Years long ache disappearing, well-being arriving,
heaven on earth how could all this be for me,
when did I do anything to deserve this treatment?

A gentle knock on my door, as I lay sleeping
in a massive bedroom, adorned for royalty.
"You've been invited at The Feast tonight."
I recall this loving moment fleetingly pass by,
how lovely he looked standing there,
"and Dad said he likes to meet you as well."

I remember how confused I had been, Dad?
A party tonight, seeing Dad, who and what else?
Why is he looking after me so fantastically well?
My mind was in turmoil after all these events,
several hours ago I still lay dying in my filth,
and now..? now I was so alive and so fulfilled!

Gratitude arose like paradise restored within,
never before did I feel so much thankfulness,
I'd been rescued from a life of painful misery,
saved from the wretchedness of my existence,
restored to human dignity, loved and cared for,
deep down I knew Life had found me for good.
I

Beautiful poem
 
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Junia

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Jeshu. Did you write that? It makes me think that I'm not holding on to the Lord Jesus as tightly as I should. It is like the only way to win the war against depression is to be completely sold out to Jesus and I haven't been doing that. I believe your advice is true. Thank you!!! Be blessed. You have shown me a better way.
I
Yes! I feel this...depression and other issues mean I am not as sold out for Jesus as I should be and that makes me feel sad and anxious
 
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Jeshu

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Yes! I feel this...depression and other issues mean I am not as sold out for Jesus as I should be and that makes me feel sad and anxious

Then love Jesus for loving you any way, and standing there patently beside you awaiting your call. He loves to fill you up to the brim with love for God and neighbour.

So please understand that Jesus is also sad about the fact that love life between you and Him could be better. He has often been sad with me as well. i have been so rebellious thinking bad about Him. Especially at first. His love cast out the fear, so please don't be alarmed. i don't want my joy in the Lord to make you feel bad, but rather i love to tell you that there was a time when i had none of that. Just a sin, guilt ridden heart - yet He loved me away from there. He taught me to love when He crowned love for God and neighbour supreme commander over my life. Things have stately on got better.

Praying this psalm with all my hurting heart really helped air the air in my life and bring me closer to Jesus. i invite you to bare your heart to Him as well. And let Him take the reigns in your life.

 
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Junia

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Then love Jesus for loving you any way, and standing there patently beside you awaiting your call. He loves to fill you up to the brim with love for God and neighbour.

So please understand that Jesus is also sad about the fact that love life between you and Him could be better. He has often been sad with me as well. i have been so rebellious thinking bad about Him. Especially at first. His love cast out the fear, so please don't be alarmed. i don't want my joy in the Lord to make you feel bad, but rather i love to tell you that there was a time when i had none of that. Just a sin, guilt ridden heart - yet He loved me away from there. He taught me to love when He crowned love for God and neighbour supreme commander over my life. Things have stately on got better.

Praying this psalm with all my hurting heart really helped air the air in my life and bring me closer to Jesus. i invite you to bare your heart to Him as well. And let Him take the reigns in your life.

I

Thank you so much...I am asking God to fill me and to give me a capacity to love. He can create that in me because I know he cHi work miracles
 
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Jeshu

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He can create that in me because I know he cHi work miracles

Don't ask and wait for love but rather love. The more you practise faith and love the more hope will live in you. His truth works like that. To love is an active response in the heart, only don't let the devil trick you into believing you have to do this or that, only what you love to do is required by the Lord. If we love to serve Him He is pleased with our love sacrifices not otherwise.

So yes please do put your faith in His love and learn to heed His word and let His truth set you free from your tormentors. Watch the process within yourself if you like. Each time you act out of faith in God's love, His love descends from above. This is the whole idea of serving Jesus to trust in His grace no matter what, through thick and thin. Even if we have sinned. Even when we have been taken by the enemy and become slaves to sin. i was a slave to sin for years before the Lord bought me free. i will always love Him for setting me free from my sin and giving me a new heart.


What Jesus did for me He wants to do for you. Honestly true.

Let His love cast out your fear and save you the fearful one.:hug:
 
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Junia

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Don't ask and wait for love but rather love. The more you practise faith and love the more hope will live in you. His truth works like that. To love is an active response in the heart, only don't let the devil trick you into believing you have to do this or that, only what you love to do is required by the Lord. If we love to serve Him He is pleased with our love sacrifices not otherwise.

So yes please do put your faith in His love and learn to heed His word and let His truth set you free from your tormentors. Watch the process within yourself if you like. Each time you act out of faith in God's love, His love descends from above. This is the whole idea of serving Jesus to trust in His grace no matter what, through thick and thin. Even if we have sinned. Even when we have been taken by the enemy and become slaves to sin. i was a slave to sin for years before the Lord bought me free. i will always love Him for setting me free from my sin and giving me a new heart.


What Jesus did for me He wants to do for you. Honestly true.

Let His love cast out your fear and save you the fearful one.:hug:
I

Thank you so much. Be blessed ❤❤❤❤
 
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Jeshu

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Crimson Red To Lily White.
Who denies us Jesus Christ?
The originator of our wilful sin
Satan is but one of his names,
being a snake is his occupation
he will try hard to keep Jesus out.

With split tongue he speaks,
for no truth can be found in him.
He has no love or good life to give,
rather his bad life kills good within.
Viper nests hatching misery and sin

The wicked have their birth in him,
silencing the righteous along the way.
They love burning up our good life,
sinful orgies galore with them around.
They love evil and hate good.

God's judgement hovers on those,
harbouring the wicked in their hearts
Those in us who fear the light of day
And hate God their ugly truth to see.
Those deeds hiding in secret places.

So please repent from sinful life
Hand the wicked over to Jesus
Let His loving truth fell them all
So you in His love may dwell,
be cleansed from wicked brood.

Now you can tell the world
Jesus saved you from your sin
For His good life will now grow
As you are reborn anew within.
Free from bondage to sin's misery

Who will now deny you Jesus Christ?
The devil and his evil hordes?
They're now safely in the pit below.
As the very trap they dug for you,
is now their very own home.

 
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This is the deepest truth i found to be true within myself and that was that Jesus came and befriended me the suffering one. i had suffered myself in wicked deeds all my life. i had repented ten thousand times for the things i did when i was led by the wicked. i had always agonised them living in my heart. And in that self I hated hated myself in my suffering self a weakling.

True i had also self where I had feasted with the wicked in the past. In my big egocentric self I turned out to be the son of lawlessness in disguise. Jesus cut him out of me showing me my sins and misery for 7 years in the pit without any faith in His love. It was hell come true down there. I hated myself and condemned myself to death down there. In those selves I did not receive faith to get away from the power of the wicked. When sin was washed off me in such thinking and feeling I was washed off along with it. Time and again until the word preached its verdict over me.

Ezekiel 24:1-24
In the ninth year, in the tenth month on the tenth day, the word of the Lord came to me: “Son of man, record this date, this very date, because the king of Babylon has laid siege to Jerusalem this very day. Tell this rebellious people a parable and say to them: ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says:


“‘Put on the cooking pot; put it on
and pour water into it.
Put into it the pieces of meat,
all the choice pieces—the leg and the shoulder.
Fill it with the best of these bones;
take the pick of the flock.
Pile wood beneath it for the bones;
bring it to a boil
and cook the bones in it.


“‘For this is what the Sovereign Lord says:

“‘Woe to the city of bloodshed,
to the pot now encrusted,
whose deposit will not go away!
Take the meat out piece by piece
in whatever order it comes.


“‘For the blood she shed is in her midst:
She poured it on the bare rock;
she did not pour it on the ground,
where the dust would cover it.
To stir up wrath and take revenge
I put her blood on the bare rock,
so that it would not be covered.


“‘Therefore this is what the Sovereign Lord says:

“‘Woe to the city of bloodshed!
I, too, will pile the wood high.
So heap on the wood
and kindle the fire.
Cook the meat well,
mixing in the spices;
and let the bones be charred.
Then set the empty pot on the coals
till it becomes hot and its copper glows,
so that its impurities may be melted
and its deposit burned away.
It has frustrated all efforts;
its heavy deposit has not been removed,
not even by fire.


“‘Now your impurity is lewdness. Because I tried to cleanse you but you would not be cleansed from your impurity, you will not be clean again until my wrath against you has subsided.


“‘I the Lord have spoken. The time has come for me to act. I will not hold back; I will not have pity, nor will I relent. You will be judged according to your conduct and your actions, declares the Sovereign Lord.’”


i never realised that this is what would happen but I utterly perished in my dishonest, prideful, arrogant, selfish, doubting and unbelieving self. So when i saw those so strong in lies die like flies with the dragon ruling, i knew that Revelation was really coming true right inside my heart for i saw all the numbered died like flies! My oppressors. The very self I had been in sin. (Isaiah 57:3-4) That self in me in which I had caused me all my heart ache was destroyed by Jesus Christ in the desert of my desolation suicidally depressed. Who could have foretold that Jesus knew me that intimately and could punish that severely?


Who could have foretold He would come to my aid in such manner? Bringing me rock bottom and collecting me in my true self for such can withstand the battle of lies. True self is indestructible, Jesus made sure of that. Only in my untrue self i suffered death as penalty. Truly i had not realised a religious person that election is of the heart and not just of people.

This has been the best part of my walk with Jesus. How Scripture/truth comes alive inside my inner world of being because loving God and neighbour saves me from my sins like nothing else does.

Honest this is how my life used to be from righteous moments to unrighteous moments all day long. From having faith to not having any faith at all. From serving God with zeal to hating Him for forbidding me my fun. From loving true to stampeding all over love a loveless sinner.

However now can live united as one within myself and glory in God for untrue self has been sliced off, literally like that!

Hebrews 4:12-13 did warn me about that but i had forgotten to take note until it happened.

"For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account."

And so He set me free to love Him and neighbour and to grow stronger than my illness can throw at me. All praise to God for saving me out of my pit.

Peace.
T

What a beautiful testimony
 
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Jeshu

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What a beautiful testimony

Yes i will always love Jesus for giving me that story to write. i wrote this poem when i finally climbed out of my pit and i left suicidal depression behind for good. i like to share it with you to encourage you on your way.

Peace

Forsaking The Pit.

As i climb over the rim, i clearly see,
Involuntary i shudder the sight in me,
Down without a bottom the pit below,
Yes this fiery hole within me on show!

Hear voices of darkness pressing hard on must.
Those 'speaking guilt, shame, unbelief, and distrust,
All together pushing, yes, pressing me deep,
Resisting my climb to the top so steep.

See those guilty feelings still tug my feet,
i can feel flames searing, my toes they meet!
Electrifying my soul, no mercy on show.
Why ever did i take this hell-hole in tow?

Above me the Light, Jesus, the Truth so high!
How long before i will meet up with Him in the sky?
He knows i will come after Him without a doubt,
As true nourishing goodness He is all about.

My bloodied fingers scraped by rock,
For how many years did they mock?
Those hard places within my very being,
Those fiery stones of my own seeing!

i climbed after the Light right above me,
The only truth that truly leaves me be,
Never will i stop seeking after The Light.
As Jesus Christ is my very soul's delight!

Soon the 'resting place' of my enemy,
Bottomless pit shall forever be!
For the ones without Love or Grace.
Those who with their lies made this place.
 
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Jeshu

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The fight against the wicked means that we have to shy away from fornicating with wrong living within us through our flesh. Dishonesty, worldly pride, arrogance, lust, envy, hatred as well as hopelessness, despair, bitterness, guilt, shame and anxiety.

All these dwell in our flesh and need to resisted in the truthful love of the Lord. When we resist in our own ability we will certainly falter, but when build on the love of The lord and in accordance to the word then we cannot fail.

To accept grace, every day again, keeps us humble and loving towards God for His grace. A humbly loving heart shies away from sin like nothing else does. Humble loving people don't seek out sin.

So hand your big I to God and let Him chop it down to size, you will be pleasantly surprised with the outcome.

Peace.
 
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Jeshu

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Fighting mental illness can be made easier when listen to music that is upbuilding. Scripture sung is best but there is also good Gospel music around that can really help fighting the demons of our ill minds.

Oh how much has Jesus not arrested me listening to Scripture songs. Where the word literally arrested me in my wrong thinking or feeling correcting me with the truths of Scripture sung to me.

Especially artist like the Sons of Korah, an Australian band, who sing almost exclusively out of the Psalms. Psalms 6, 23, 51, 121 and 139 and stand out in my mind here. i know all the words by heart and always check if i'm in the same truths they sing about.






It is amazing how much i have learned to admire God's word. As a matter of fact Jesus never uses other truths than the truths of Scripture. He is the living word within me, i love Him the most. He always brings me back to the truths of Scripture when my mind strays. i will always love Him for teaching me the power of the word.

Yet Gospel music can also help when my moods are not so low then i can handle a bit of that.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iq5URsXbKXs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oZvKJl1kK8g

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iKIwL0GlSfs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HCx6MEdeli4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jdN4fo4duO8

These are some of my most beloved artists. Like i have said before music can be a powerful force for good in our lives if we choose wisely and listen to indisputable biblical truths. So often our ill minds lie to us and we can find correction within heeding the truths of God's word as we battle our wayward feelings and emotions.

That our merciful and loving Father in Heaven bless you richly in your battles with the enemy friends.
 
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Jeshu

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One good thing about this thread is that i started it more than 10 years ago, and i have seen much healing since then. To compare worlds would be hard. Like coming out of a black hole and ascending into heaven instead.

He heard my cry for mercy! All i had to do was believe that and His love began to rebuild me, each step in faith a bit more.

Those instant conversions where you are all better in one go did not come my way. Second by second i entered the kingdom over a period of at least 7 years. My stubborn sins did not start to disappear till later on in the process, when love and admiration for God had reached those levels that i wanted to do away with sin.

Loving God knows little sin i have learned to understand.

At first i read the bible a lot. Always past my heart. Always letting the word sink in. i knew God did not send His word out for nothing but that He would achieve the purpose for which He send it. It was building on the truths of scripture that had me growing in His love.

Now i read it a lot less. A few times a day at max. i do still listen to the word in music especially when i'm down and so easily slip from my secure position hearing negative lies all day long. i let the truth fight my battles and have learned to counter attack all satan's lies with God's truth. i love God's word.

If you are hurting and hopeless down there in your pit, please know that faith in God's love will get you out of there. It is about learning to exercise your faith up against the lies of satan. With God you never loose a battle. It is absolutely amazing what His word can do in our lives.

Isaiah 55:6-13
Seek the Lord while he may be found;
call on him while he is near.
Let the wicked forsake their ways
and the unrighteous their thoughts.
Let them turn to the Lord, and he will have mercy on them,
and to our God, for he will freely pardon.



“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
“As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.
As the rain and the snow
come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.
You will go out in joy
and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills
will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field
will clap their hands.
Instead of the thornbush will grow the juniper,
and instead of briers the myrtle will grow.
This will be for the Lord’s renown,
for an everlasting sign,
that will endure forever.”
 
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Jeshu

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My Darkest Tale.
The darkness was hovering right before me
the icy chill of death touched my heart
"No not YOU! I hate you most of all.
Always trying to kill my love,"
I cried, in deadly terror at his presence,
frantically trying to keep the darkness at bay.

"Go away satan this one is Mine!"
Jesus spoke with utmost authority.
Fuming the devil slithered away.
Almost did I sell my soul to satan!
If Jesus would not have spoken out,
I would have turned out very bad.

So glad Jesus stopped me that night.
Stopped me from selling my soul.
Instead He taught me what was right,
to love God, neighbour as well as self.
And to grow my life into His eternal truth.
Obeying His Spirit, learning to love true.
 
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Jeshu

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i never deserved salvation, that much i know for certain to be true. Grace is undeserved favour. Undeserved favour because of the undeserved wrath The Father inflicted on the Son. i have learned to love Jesus so much over the time He has been revealed in my life. Jesus is awesome, truly a Hero of renown. He suffered me for years before we got to know each other. Jesus is so patient.

i hope and pray that all suffering people will find Him as their Lord and Saviour. The truth is when we begin to love He comes alive within. That is the hallmark of Jesus living within we love God and neighbour truthfully. Sure we fall short. The grace is not earned! Our deeds are a response to the work of God within us. A thankful God loving heart will love their neighbour.

So if you are like me and have lost the emotion we call love then please be encouraged by my story. Love is more than a feeling, for i haven't felt love the emotion love for many years, yet we can know love and act out of Him.

i try to live my life an open book. i share everything i do with Jesus. i know He is always with me. i know He loves me true. i know He will never leave me no matter how down i am. i know He is King of kings and Lord of lords in my heart. i seek to obey His voice within. When He speaks i try to respond. His yoke is not heavy and His burden is light. He truly is who He says He is.

My Identity In Him.
"You are who your are,"
says the Lord Jesus.
"My Father and I,
in you and with you in all.
Together loving true
forever and ever
Amen."
 
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Jeshu

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i think serving Jesus when struggling with mental illness is a must. i would not have known how to survive without Him.

Loving God makes us do His word which gives us a sound mind. About two years ago it dawned on me i had been insane for many years, yet now that type of thinking and feeling has all been exposed by Jesus as not true and not right.

Loving Jesus has proven to be true and was just as valid when i was still insane. Jesus takes us loving Him very serious for it is our life line.

As a matter of fact that is who Jesus has been in my life, a touch of sanity amidst insanity. As He grew within me, sanity was restored in those parts of my life. Weird how that went in retrospect, so easy to see now, but in those days it was very hard to distinguish truth from lies and satan constantly used my ill mind against me. Making me think and feel things which hurt Jesus immensely, but my sins against Jesus could not stop Jesus. Each time my mood would become repentant and i would seek out His loving truth again. Each time Jesus received me with open arms.

Building one's psyche with Scripture is not as easy as it seems, for i was not allowed to interfere in that process, defiled by my sins i had to leave that up to Jesus. As a matter of fact each time i tried doing it myself i failed and suffered major set back.

It took some time for trust to grow but seeing the word do His work within me made me realise how true the word truly is. In the end i was completely convinced that Jesus truly lived in my heart and spoke through the word in the Spirit of love for God, self and neighbour.

Love for self was essential in building me new life and the hardest to achieve. i hated myself in my sin and misery, and because i hated myself i treated myself terribly, constantly sowing bad life in my heart doing those unloving things towards myself

Jesus showed me the difference. He treated me loving no matter how sinful i was or had been. He was always happy when i would come to Him for help. He would never put me down or reprimand me in a unkind way. Rather He wash the sin right off me - time and again.

In the end i realised that loving oneself with the love of God is very different than building with selfish love, as a matter of fact, selfish love is no love at all but unclean spirituality which brought forth the son of lawlessness in me. That very big egocentric arrogant prideful self i had been in sin. Jesus cut him down big time when He was revealed in me.

So glad Jesus killed that self in me and gave me a humble God loving heart instead.

So if you suffer from mental illness and want to see positive change in your life, go to Jesus and let Him rebuild you with the word and in the word. Jesus is an awesome way away from our suffering.

 
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