Why Does This Keep Happening to Me? :(

Rose2020 said:

Who do you mean by they?

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When i said "they", I mean the suggestive whispers, the devils attempt to bring fear into your life.

Rose2020 said:

It seems like whenever I don't feel the best and my mind is clouded I start having unwanted thoughts that I could lose my salvation because I think about what if I turned away from Christ and I just didn't care anymore. That thought really scares me because I LOVE Him and I don't ever want to do that!! I love Him SO much!!!

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You are trusting in your feeble self for salvation instead of Christ.

Rose2020 said:

That brings up the question why does Satan hate Jesus so much? He was created to be the most beautiful angel in Heaven,.. does it say in the Bible why he turned bad?

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Yes, because he wanted to be like some "gods" who was above him, who were like God.

Rose2020 said:

It seems like whenever I don't feel the best and my mind is clouded I start having unwanted thoughts that I could lose my salvation because I think about what if I turned away from Christ and I just didn't care anymore. That thought really scares me because I LOVE Him and I don't ever want to do that!! I love Him SO much!!!

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You cannot lose your salvation... That is the devil planting seeds of doubt.

God has promised that He will not let anyone snatch you from His grasp.

Sometimes we come to Jesus from a religious background that has kept the trinity as this abstract deity outside of us someplace. And we earn glimpses according to how good we are. This is from the pits of hell, scripture says we come to Christ and receive the Holy Spirit, He lives in us, He seals us till the day of redemption. The Holy Spirit is the single most powerful force on earth and we fall short of recognizing what it is we have gained and that He is for us not against us. But we have free will, we can use that will to fluff along in our Christianity or instead to work with the power of the new spirit living in us. We are a "New Creation in Christ" in 2 Corinthians 5:17, we have a new spiritual heart, we have a new destination upon the first death when our bodies die ( we were destined to hell now to heaven) and we miss the second death on judgement day entirely in Revelation 2:11 and also 20:6.

You don't get to undue this because of doubt, your name is in the book of life in heaven. Rest in it, use it to the glory of God, thank Him too and do it joyfully !!

Rose2020 said:

It seems like whenever I don't feel the best and my mind is clouded I start having unwanted thoughts that I could lose my salvation because I think about what if I turned away from Christ and I just didn't care anymore. That thought really scares me because I LOVE Him and I don't ever want to do that!! I love Him SO much!!!

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Well, putting aside bad spirits etc here are 2 more 'earthly' considerations:
1) If you did turn away, what would that look like, that is, what would you do differently in your life?
Perhaps the answer may shed light on some area that you need to understand better and maybe work on or make changes in. So, and just as an example, having a glass of wine occasionally may not be that bad & is not un-Christian or you may decide its entirely wrong then you may need to work (slowly and over time) on not wanting or caring for a drink at all, so you can live freely without it.

2) Are you doing too much, for example, too many church commitments or other activities because you think thats what a Christian should do. Overloading yourself is counterproductive.

Just a couple of points to think about.

Rose2020 said:

It seems like whenever I don't feel the best and my mind is clouded I start having unwanted thoughts that I could lose my salvation because I think about what if I turned away from Christ and I just didn't care anymore. That thought really scares me because I LOVE Him and I don't ever want to do that!! I love Him SO much!!!

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Sounds a lot like anxiety. Have you talked with the doc?

Rose2020 said:

Uhh,.. I don't think this is anything to go see the doctor about but thanks for your concern.

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Sorry if I was misunderstanding the situation. A lot of people struggle with similar anxious thoughts, like: "What if I blaspheme the Holy Spirit?" It is sometimes more of a psychological issue than spiritual.

Rose2020 said:

It seems like whenever I don't feel the best and my mind is clouded I start having unwanted thoughts that I could lose my salvation because I think about what if I turned away from Christ and I just didn't care anymore. That thought really scares me because I LOVE Him and I don't ever want to do that!! I love Him SO much!!!

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The very thought that these thoughts cause you angst is a sign of how deep Gods love is for you! You would not be so attacked with doubt, if God did not care so much. The devil is simply trying to get you to focus on self in stead of the Savior!

Draw nigh unto God and hear will draw nigh unto you-Resist the devil and he will flee you! Remember that you are in the Fathers hands and no one can pluck you out! Put to memory the Scriptures that show you are secure in yor salvation and when your own doubts or the devil attack, quote them to yourself until teh storm passes.

REmember these are just storms like a rain or snow storm- they are fierce while they last, but they have come to pass to make you strong.

No fear. You can doubt yourself as much as you want, but don't give your self-doubt or your fears too much credit. Same with feelings, you might feel secure today, but insecure tomorrow. But your feelings aren't Christ. It's about Christ, after all, what He did and who He is. His strength, His sacrifice, His promise. Your life is hid with Christ and you are sealed by the Spirit. Don't look into yourself in how good or bad you are, look into Him who said "I give them eternal life, and they will never perish. No one can snatch them out of My hand". Your anxious mind has no power over God, Christ or His love and care.

There usually comes a time when we can't take any more of our spiritual anxieties, and then we just lay down our arms and surrender everything to God. We are never as good as we'd like. When we learn to surrender our anxieties to God, as we are told to do, continually, we are actively rejecting the notion that we have to adhere to our fears and anxieties all alone. We are also rejecting the notion that we can somehow climb up to God on our merits.

Remember, we are not given the spirit of fear. We can choose not to obey fear. We can feel it, it can slap us around, but we don't have to obey it, and we don't have to dive into it as if we had to panic over all our thoughts. Just give it to God, let God be God and your Father who cares for you. He is not someone who throws a curve ball for confused people who can drop it any given time.

All of this is easy to say of course. I'm still learning to do this. But I'm so much better at it than I was before. I'm not looking inward into myself, because I don't find anything good in there, but I'm looking outward into Christ and I go to Him as I am, with all my sin, insecurities and weaknesses. And every time I fail to do that, the more I'm reminded that I should. I don't have to carry all of this useless speculation in my heart, I don't have to drown under my fears, I can just leave it to God, trust in His care, and in the strength and faithfulness of Christ instead of mine.

Take it easy now.

Rose2020 said:

It seems like whenever I don't feel the best and my mind is clouded I start having unwanted thoughts that I could lose my salvation because I think about what if I turned away from Christ and I just didn't care anymore. That thought really scares me because I LOVE Him and I don't ever want to do that!! I love Him SO much!!!

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Free time can be a killer. The simplest solution is to stop thinking and start doing stuff. I know it's easier said than done.

Find a hobby, it worked for my schizophrenic mom. Whenever she did her paint by numbers craft, the voices stopped.

Rose2020 said:

What do you mean by that?

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The fact you doubt is a sign of God working in your heart. Unrepentent or hard hearted don't care about these things.

Rose2020 said:

It seems like whenever I don't feel the best and my mind is clouded I start having unwanted thoughts that I could lose my salvation because I think about what if I turned away from Christ and I just didn't care anymore. That thought really scares me because I LOVE Him and I don't ever want to do that!! I love Him SO much!!!

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Firstly i would like to say i am glad i am not the only one who is having these feelings, but let me tell you something, its spiritual warfare. Also we are literally at the doorstep of the tribulation. In the end times there will be a great falling away. And while i don't know every type of believer who will be part of the great falling away we can definitely know it will be people who don't engage in spiritual warfare and fight to keep their faith, we need to fight the good fight and pray and read the bible everyday.

I recommend watching this movie:

I'll be in prayer for you! So sorry that this is happening, but please hold onto the faith and the word as your strength. As you fill your mind with the word of God, you will be able to use the word as a weapon and armor against the evil one. You can read Ephesians 6

Everyone has this, whats different is how you choose to respond to it. You are responding to it as a negative thing, but I have chosen to respond to thoughts like this as an opportunity to reaffirm my choice to accept Jesus as my Lord and Saviour. Even in times you're not really feeling it you can still choose to declare it; to yourself, to God and to others. I turn the negative thought into an opportunity for a positive declaration.

The other thing that I see as being just as important in how we choose to react is forgiveness. Even if you dont feel it you can choose to forgive someone, or the way I now view it is you can choose to let go of the unforgiveness you are holding on to.