Romance Novels = Book inappropriate content?

Dust and Ashes

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I don't think romance novels are the same as men watching inappropriate content but they can cause unrealistic expectations. I don't think it's wrong or ungodly to have sexual tension between a man and woman in a romance novel (providing their romance itself is not wrong in that one is married, etc.) because God wired us to be sexual creatures and to be attracted to each other. I love the way John Hagee puts it, "God created sex. Sex is good. Most of you are here because of it." ;)

I think sexuality in fiction can be perfectly healthy and even edifying if it is done well. You can also get some great ideas for romantic evenings/getaways from good romance fiction. I do, however think it's unwise to use the ideals in romance novels to judge men or women since it is fiction.

Of course a lot has to do with the author. I'm not necessarily as dependent on visual stimulation as some men so I can become quite aroused from reading well written prose. I don't know how some of the "scenes" affect women but if something is sexually arousing, then it might qualify as inappropriate content for that individual? Just some thoughts.
 
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HundredFootKrutch

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Cordelia said:
I understand. I shouldn't have attacked you, forgive me? :) My point was only...you were citing a theory (right?) that equated romance novels with inappropriate content films in their damaging effect. That offended me just a tad as a reader of all kinds of books, including romances, and I know there are wonderful, well-written romance novels out there that don't deserve to be compared with inappropriate content films (or trash like sex books). And not all women readers are the same, that's all. I'm sorry, and I do get your basic point. A lot of us girls are more tethered to emotions and stuff like that than guys!

Blessings, Cordie
Ok, were even. I am glad to get this cleared up thank you for being so understanding.
 
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ZiSunka

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I just think all a woman's desires should be toward her husband, and all a man's desires should be towards his wife. Neither of them should be using inappropriate content or romance novels to stimulate desire, but should the same attention and energy into enjoying their mate and being happy.

Say you spend 20 minutes reading inappropriate content/romance to stimulate desire. That's 20 minutes of trying to get excited by something external to your marriage, lusting after another man/woman. God says that's wrong. No matter that you plan to make love to your spouse afterward, what you are really doing is lusting after another person, thus committing adultery in your mind. The fact that you make love to your spouse later doesn't change that, because you are really just using his/her body to complete the act of lusting after someone else.
 
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ZiSunka

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Any literature that causes you to lust for another person than your spouse is inappropriate contentography, by definition.

1 : the depiction of erotic behavior (as in pictures or writing) intended to cause sexual excitement
2 : material (as books or a photograph) that depicts erotic behavior and is intended to cause sexual excitement
 
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Dust and Ashes

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lambslove said:
Any literature that causes you to lust for another person than your spouse is inappropriate contentography, by definition.

1 : the depiction of erotic behavior (as in pictures or writing) intended to cause sexual excitement
2 : material (as books or a photograph) that depicts erotic behavior and is intended to cause sexual excitement
Guess we better rip the Song of Songs out of the Bible then.
 
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Stringaling

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I read an article about a study that was done on men and women. The study concluded that when women read romance novels the same thing happens chemically in their brains that does when a man looks at inappropriate content. So reading those lust-in-the-dust novels produces the same chemical-hormonal reaction in women that inappropriate content does in men. HMMMMM.....
 
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IZ2ZION

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The Book of Songs doesn't stimultate desire. It is a book that shows respect, love, and a true way that a man should treat his wife. Songs also shows very human emotions that go hand in hand with two people courting each other, so don't defile it by comparing it to some trashy romance novel that deals with lustful situations, adultery, and sinful behaviours.

----------------
Clay
 
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Dust and Ashes

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IZ2ZION said:
The Book of Songs doesn't stimultate desire. It is a book that shows respect, love, and a true way that a man should treat his wife. Songs also shows very human emotions that go hand in hand with two people courting each other, so don't defile it by comparing it to some trashy romance novel that deals with lustful situations, adultery, and sinful behaviours.

----------------
Clay
Hello? I'm not comparing it to some trashy novel. Not all romance fiction is trashy; some is, well, umm.. romance. Unless, of course you think romance is a bad thing. My very point from my previous posts was that not all romantic fiction is trashy inappropriate content and if it is written well, it can be very beautiful. I suppose that makes movies like Sleepless in Seattle inappropriate contentographic?
 
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Just a Pilgrim

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My boyfriend gave me access to his kindle kindle a few months ago because it had a specific chronological bible reading plan that is non longer sold or in print when I had no kindle of my one and wanted to pay for it.

Although almost all of his books are political and spiritual, I was horrified today when I discovered that it has like six erotic fiction novels with really graphic images:

1. Desperation (the Island Book 1) by CB Stone (this one that looked clean)
2. Nine Trails 1: First Shift by J.L. Weil
3.Monster Girl Islands by Logan Jacobs (erotic cover)
4. Elf Puncher by Simon Archer (also looked clean)
5. Making Monster Girls: For Science! by Eric Vall (erotic cover)
6. Succubus Lord 14: Swimsuit Edition by Eric Vall (erotic cover)
7. Dragon Emperor 3: Human to Dragon to God by Eric Vall

Again, I had no idea he was downloading this stuff and I thought he was happy with me. I only found out by accident and have no access to his other stuff. I’m obviously going to talk to him about it but I’m just wondering if I should just think about leaving him.
 
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bèlla

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I think its important to give equal attention to the book’s content and its affect on your mind and heart. Is reading an enjoyable pastime or escapism that feeds your hunger for the life you lack? If you find yourself daydreaming and drawing comparisons between your partner and the leading character and he falls short; that’s a problem.

Writers are gifted storytellers. But novels aren’t meant to fill the gap or be used as a measuring stick for our companion. We’ll never have someone who emulates the leading man perfectly or experience the same within ourselves.

It isn’t real. When we consciously entertain fantasies we become disconnected from reality. Make believe is more appealing than the hardships we encounter elsewhere.

As a rule, I limit my fiction reading to classics, clean historical romances, Christian Amish tales and cozy mysteries. I am equally interested in the storyline and where it leads. I’ve noticed an emotive response to Amish books. Primarily due to the moral message and the reminders of real events or similar hurts it might evoke.

For this reason I limit my consumption. It isn’t edifying if the book is fostering upset or putting me in the wrong headspace. We must be willing to do the hard thing for our betterment. Some times no is the best response.

Yours in His Service,

~Bella
 
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Hrairoo

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I like urban fantasy books where it mixes modern times with supernatural creatures and magic goings on. I don't have a problem with the predominance of romance in these books; a good character is a good character and you root for them and want to see them happy. What I really have a low tolerance for is smut. If they're two characters that I genuinely like and root for(which implies that the author has taken time and several chapters to build this character-reader empathy), I don't mind so much if they are intimate together. But 1. The book shouldn't lose sight of the plot(I didn't pick it up just to read about them in the bedroom over and over) and 2. If it's graphic to any degree, then I prefer it to be short. Please, don't go on and on for pages about every explicit detail. And this has more to do with my male sensibilities than any sort of reverence. I just don't have the patience for story telling that is unfocused in that way.

I've picked up books that folks have recommended and I've not finished them because they're inappropriate content without plot. Just as an example, no offense to those who like it, but Christine Feehan drives me crazy. I tried reading Dark Prince and the characters aren't smart, they're not likable, and there is "loving" just slapped in there as a sloppy shortcut for chemistry. Don't even get me started on the insipid "fated lovers" trope which takes away all sense and agency. I've seen mate bonds done well. This was not it.

My favorite trope for romance is enemies to lovers. It requires some thought when you start out with two people who kinda hate each other and eventually get them to fall for one another. There's a sense of growth if it is handled well, also, there's a sense of fun and tension, because often, we the readers realize they're in love before they do. And most importantly, when they dislike each other they often snipe and verbally jab at each other but in charismatic and comedic fashion, thus making you fall in love with their characters individually and fall in love with the interactions they have. It feels earned then, after all of that, if they are intimate together.
 
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