I want to know God’s purpose for this struggle

JordanL103 · Apr 10, 2020

Hello everyone, I would like to share something that has tortured me for years. And forgive me for not going into too much details, I just want to know why this suffering won’t end and why it is even like this. So basically the situation is, I fell in deep love with someone I will never be able to meet (as of now at least, I can’t predict the future)
Please don’t ask any questions, I have way too many questions of my own. And as you can guess, struggles like this can lead to severe depression and mental illness.
I just want to know why God has put that special someone in my life, but yet makes it impossible to go see them. I hope no one ever goes through this torture.
I have wondered and wondered, is it because something better is waiting? Or is it because God thinks I’m not ready yet? I know no one really knows God’s plan and intentions, but I’m human, and I need an answer. I need reasons. Explanations. I can’t keep going on without knowing WHY. I honestly do believe that God has a plan for everyone that is for the ultimate good, because I’ve experienced it many times. But for severe issues like this, I can’t just be kept in the unknown. But where do I go find the answer at all? I just can’t get over it.
I have prayed and asked for answers, but it never came. I’m still stuck deep in this pain.
This has came to a point where I question the existence of God. This makes me question everything. It makes me feel like my life is a lie. It’s horrible. Because all my life I’ve seen the wonderful works of God, I’ve seen miracles. And I do believe these very much. But how come this one doesn’t come with a solution? Why does this has to happen? I just wanna live a normal life like everyone. Be with the one I love. But God has made it impossible. If so, what’s the point of putting this special person in my life? Just to have fun and torture me? I feel such a deep connection to this person, like I never ever had before. And yet I can’t progress with them, and I do seriously ask God, how will he give back all these wasted precious years.
maybe one of you can be the messenger of God and tell me something. Because I need it. I need the affirmations, I need a reason for me to keep having faith and not crash. Because I’ve had it.
I just wanna drive over and go visit and see them, but why is God stopping me?
I am very satisfied and grateful with everything else about the life God has gave me.

SkyWriting · Apr 10, 2020

JordanL103 said:
Hello everyone, I would like to share something that has tortured me for years.

You should work on how you deal with "torture."
That's what you control. Think about how you would
prefer to deal with torture. Make plans to think about
your thinking at least once a day. And know that each
step, you will know more.

JesusisLord7 · Apr 10, 2020

Jesus is most beautiful, fall in love with Him and you will not be disappointed.

Michie · Apr 10, 2020

JordanL103 said:
Hello everyone, I would like to share something that has tortured me for years. And forgive me for not going into too much details, I just want to know why this suffering won’t end and why it is even like this. So basically the situation is, I fell in deep love with someone I will never be able to meet (as of now at least, I can’t predict the future)
Please don’t ask any questions, I have way too many questions of my own. And as you can guess, struggles like this can lead to severe depression and mental illness.
I just want to know why God has put that special someone in my life, but yet makes it impossible to go see them. I hope no one ever goes through this torture.
I have wondered and wondered, is it because something better is waiting? Or is it because God thinks I’m not ready yet? I know no one really knows God’s plan and intentions, but I’m human, and I need an answer. I need reasons. Explanations. I can’t keep going on without knowing WHY. I honestly do believe that God has a plan for everyone that is for the ultimate good, because I’ve experienced it many times. But for severe issues like this, I can’t just be kept in the unknown. But where do I go find the answer at all? I just can’t get over it.
I have prayed and asked for answers, but it never came. I’m still stuck deep in this pain.
This has came to a point where I question the existence of God. This makes me question everything. It makes me feel like my life is a lie. It’s horrible. Because all my life I’ve seen the wonderful works of God, I’ve seen miracles. And I do believe these very much. But how come this one doesn’t come with a solution? Why does this has to happen? I just wanna live a normal life like everyone. Be with the one I love. But God has made it impossible. If so, what’s the point of putting this special person in my life? Just to have fun and torture me? I feel such a deep connection to this person, like I never ever had before. And yet I can’t progress with them, and I do seriously ask God, how will he give back all these wasted precious years.
maybe one of you can be the messenger of God and tell me something. Because I need it. I need the affirmations, I need a reason for me to keep having faith and not crash. Because I’ve had it.
I just wanna drive over and go visit and see them, but why is God stopping me?
I am very satisfied and grateful with everything else about the life God has gave me.

Online relationship I assume?

Monna · Apr 10, 2020

JordanL103 said:
I have wondered and wondered, is it because something better is waiting? Or is it because God thinks I’m not ready yet? I know no one really knows God’s plan and intentions, but I’m human, and I need an answer. I need reasons. Explanations. I can’t keep going on without knowing WHY. I honestly do believe that God has a plan for everyone that is for the ultimate good, because I’ve experienced it many times. But for severe issues like this, I can’t just be kept in the unknown. But where do I go find the answer at all? I just can’t get over it.

Man, do I recognise myself in your descriptions! And ironically, I was thinking just today, how appropriate this kind of frustration and bewilderment is on this Easter weekend.

JordanL103 said:
I have prayed and asked for answers, but it never came. I’m still stuck deep in this pain.

One thing you need to know for an absolute certainty. God does hear and he does answer. Personally, I am convinced he answers every time! The issue is often that we aren't open to hearing the answer - I don't mean we're not listening. Obviously, you're straining your spiritual ears. But by not being open, I mean that the answer may be so far from what we are expecting to hear, we don't even recognise that it is an answer.

That was the disciples' problem up to Pentecost, and especially over Easter. Jesus had told them many times what would happen on that Passover. They simply could not - were not able - to reconcile what he said with their preconceived ideas of the Messiah, and how the Messiah would restore the nation of Israel to it's deserved place in the world. Even after Jesus rose again, they asked him "are you going to set up you kingdom now?" They had their minds set on their own assumptions because they had also grasped from Jesus earlier words, that they themselves would rule with him! They had personal visions of grandure, vested interests in that point of view. They had the "solution" to Calvary: people made an awful error in killing Jesus, but God had corrected that error and raised him up. It was quite a while before they understood that the cross (and resurrection) was God's plan, not "something gone wrong" that he had to make adjustments for.

This same kind of thing often can get in the way of our thinking, when we pray and wait for answers. Sometimes, we conjure up in our minds a number of optional answers, like multiple choice ... but we forget to put one option being "none of the above." When the disciples were waiting for the Holy Spirit to come, on Pentecost, their preconceived perceptions of "how things should be" was that there should be 12 apostles - and not there were only 11. So what did they do? All 120 or so of them had a big discussion about criteria for selection, then went through a list of (male) individuals who would fit the criteria, narrowed down to 2, and said "OK, we'll "flip a coin" and the Spirit of God can choose!" It didn't enter their minds that maybe God was thinking of someone who was not even known to them. That God could work outside the scope of their criteria, and their little preconceived notions, simply didn't register in their heads. And that is how it sometimes is with us. One thing that is quite common with us, is our picture of God as someone who should be serving us, the way we want to be served. But he owes us nothing! Our perception of God is so totally inadequate.

I waited 40 years to understand why God had let me go through a traumatic event. And it was only when I watched close hand how hundreds of others handled their own trauma, that pennies started to drip in my very slow brain. And only then did I begin to see, and become very thankful, why my trauma was so important. Let me reassure you two things: 1: God can turn any process or event into something constructive and beneficial to those who follow him (Rom 8:28) 2: you will miss out on nothing that is good for you, if you follow him (Psalm 84:11). You can't lose!!!! Accept it.

Asking is something we do. Answering is something He does. And he DOES. But are you listening in the right direction? Are you tuned in to the right wavelength? Are you on the right "webpage?" Are you REALLY living by faith, really believing that he LOVES you, or are you defining how he must demonstrate his love - because that is neither love nor faith, and it leads to totally misplaced hope. Which will lead in turn to disappointment bitterness, rejection, and getting yet farther away from an answer. Take hope from the promise that he will not place you in a situation with which you cannot cope! You think you "just can't be kept in the dark any longer." He knows exactly how much you can take in terms of frustration. He's not testing you with that, but he has promised always that there will be a solution to that frustration - if it's not an answer you recognise as such, it will be something else. Let go of your preconceived multiple choices, REST in God and trust Him. Then wait EXPECTANTLY for a surprise!

May God give you grace, and peace of mind, and a new dosage of trust in his wisdom and love for you! He is there and He is NOT silent!

Richard T · Apr 10, 2020

Lots of people are dying and your concern rests that your love life is being put on hold. Yes, we are all being inconvenienced, but I would spend more time thinking about health care workers putting their lives on the line every day, having to go home wondering if they will give the COV-19 to one of their family, or some even are separating themselves, living in hotels. Meanwhile, seniors are isolated in nursing homes all across the countries, with visitors forbidden, some even worse with residents having the COV-19 and awaiting death. Even prisoners, under lock and key, some for non-violent offenses, being exposed to the virus and possibly getting the death sentence as a result of their crimes. Please don't be distraught by what you are facing. God too does care for your situation. Keep turning to God for yourself, he is listening and will respond.
James 5:10-11 (KJV)
10 Take, my brethren, the prophets, who have spoken in the name of the Lord, for an example of suffering affliction, and of patience.
11 Behold, we count them happy which endure. Ye have heard of the patience of Job, and have seen the end of the Lord; that the Lord is very pitiful, and of tender mercy.

FutureAndAHope · Apr 11, 2020

JordanL103 said:
Hello everyone, I would like to share something that has tortured me for years. And forgive me for not going into too much details, I just want to know why this suffering won’t end and why it is even like this. So basically the situation is, I fell in deep love with someone I will never be able to meet (as of now at least, I can’t predict the future)
Please don’t ask any questions, I have way too many questions of my own. And as you can guess, struggles like this can lead to severe depression and mental illness.
I just want to know why God has put that special someone in my life, but yet makes it impossible to go see them. I hope no one ever goes through this torture.
I have wondered and wondered, is it because something better is waiting? Or is it because God thinks I’m not ready yet? I know no one really knows God’s plan and intentions, but I’m human, and I need an answer. I need reasons. Explanations. I can’t keep going on without knowing WHY. I honestly do believe that God has a plan for everyone that is for the ultimate good, because I’ve experienced it many times. But for severe issues like this, I can’t just be kept in the unknown. But where do I go find the answer at all? I just can’t get over it.
I have prayed and asked for answers, but it never came. I’m still stuck deep in this pain.
This has came to a point where I question the existence of God. This makes me question everything. It makes me feel like my life is a lie. It’s horrible. Because all my life I’ve seen the wonderful works of God, I’ve seen miracles. And I do believe these very much. But how come this one doesn’t come with a solution? Why does this has to happen? I just wanna live a normal life like everyone. Be with the one I love. But God has made it impossible. If so, what’s the point of putting this special person in my life? Just to have fun and torture me? I feel such a deep connection to this person, like I never ever had before. And yet I can’t progress with them, and I do seriously ask God, how will he give back all these wasted precious years.
maybe one of you can be the messenger of God and tell me something. Because I need it. I need the affirmations, I need a reason for me to keep having faith and not crash. Because I’ve had it.
I just wanna drive over and go visit and see them, but why is God stopping me?
I am very satisfied and grateful with everything else about the life God has gave me.

I once had a situation where I felt God bought some one into my life, then took them away again. It broke me deeply, to the point I nearly committed suicide. However move forward some years I am now happily married to some one else, I have kids, and a family. I can see God's hand on my new relationship, I believe he bought my current wife to me. Try not live in maybes, or the past, move forward into what can be.

Some times we can feel like our light has been put out:

Lam 3:2 He hath led me and caused me to walk in darkness, and not in light.

Yet as we put our hearts in God's hand, we will come out of that dark place.

Mic 7:7-8 But as for me, I will look unto Jehovah; I will wait for the God of my salvation: my God will hear me. Rejoice not against me, O mine enemy: when I fall, I shall arise; when I sit in darkness, Jehovah will be a light unto me.

longwait · Apr 11, 2020

JordanL103 said:
Hello everyone, I would like to share something that has tortured me for years. And forgive me for not going into too much details, I just want to know why this suffering won’t end and why it is even like this. So basically the situation is, I fell in deep love with someone I will never be able to meet (as of now at least, I can’t predict the future)
Please don’t ask any questions, I have way too many questions of my own. And as you can guess, struggles like this can lead to severe depression and mental illness.
I just want to know why God has put that special someone in my life, but yet makes it impossible to go see them. I hope no one ever goes through this torture.
I have wondered and wondered, is it because something better is waiting? Or is it because God thinks I’m not ready yet? I know no one really knows God’s plan and intentions, but I’m human, and I need an answer. I need reasons. Explanations. I can’t keep going on without knowing WHY. I honestly do believe that God has a plan for everyone that is for the ultimate good, because I’ve experienced it many times. But for severe issues like this, I can’t just be kept in the unknown. But where do I go find the answer at all? I just can’t get over it.
I have prayed and asked for answers, but it never came. I’m still stuck deep in this pain.
This has came to a point where I question the existence of God. This makes me question everything. It makes me feel like my life is a lie. It’s horrible. Because all my life I’ve seen the wonderful works of God, I’ve seen miracles. And I do believe these very much. But how come this one doesn’t come with a solution? Why does this has to happen? I just wanna live a normal life like everyone. Be with the one I love. But God has made it impossible. If so, what’s the point of putting this special person in my life? Just to have fun and torture me? I feel such a deep connection to this person, like I never ever had before. And yet I can’t progress with them, and I do seriously ask God, how will he give back all these wasted precious years.
maybe one of you can be the messenger of God and tell me something. Because I need it. I need the affirmations, I need a reason for me to keep having faith and not crash. Because I’ve had it.
I just wanna drive over and go visit and see them, but why is God stopping me?
I am very satisfied and grateful with everything else about the life God has gave me.

The time has arrived and is now here to focus on God and not run after fleshly relationships. That's the reason for social distancing being implemented all over the world all at the same time!

Behold · Apr 11, 2020

JordanL103 said:
I just want to know why this suffering won’t end and why it is even like this. So basically the situation is, I fell in deep love with someone I will never be able to meet (as of now at least, I can’t predict the future)
But God has made it impossible.

You must be describing falling in love with someone "online".
That happens to a lot of people.
And now you can't go to them, because the virus panic has closed borders, or was it impossible for you to go to them, before this all started?
Also, you blame God for this not working out, as you wanted.
Well, he's not the fault.
I suspect that you didnt ask him about this relationship before it began to consume your life, and now you are stuck, and angry, hurt, bitter, and wanting to blame.

Listen, was there ever even a chance this was going to work out, before you now feel it will never?
Maybe you started what was never possible to have...

Hard to tell as you are not sharing any details that could prove its all your fault.
Maybe it isnt, but, who can tell, as you have hidden the Proof.

JordanL103 · Jun 24, 2020

Monna said:
Man, do I recognise myself in your descriptions! And ironically, I was thinking just today, how appropriate this kind of frustration and bewilderment is on this Easter weekend.

One thing you need to know for an absolute certainty. God does hear and he does answer. Personally, I am convinced he answers every time! The issue is often that we aren't open to hearing the answer - I don't mean we're not listening. Obviously, you're straining your spiritual ears. But by not being open, I mean that the answer may be so far from what we are expecting to hear, we don't even recognise that it is an answer.

That was the disciples' problem up to Pentecost, and especially over Easter. Jesus had told them many times what would happen on that Passover. They simply could not - were not able - to reconcile what he said with their preconceived ideas of the Messiah, and how the Messiah would restore the nation of Israel to it's deserved place in the world. Even after Jesus rose again, they asked him "are you going to set up you kingdom now?" They had their minds set on their own assumptions because they had also grasped from Jesus earlier words, that they themselves would rule with him! They had personal visions of grandure, vested interests in that point of view. They had the "solution" to Calvary: people made an awful error in killing Jesus, but God had corrected that error and raised him up. It was quite a while before they understood that the cross (and resurrection) was God's plan, not "something gone wrong" that he had to make adjustments for.

This same kind of thing often can get in the way of our thinking, when we pray and wait for answers. Sometimes, we conjure up in our minds a number of optional answers, like multiple choice ... but we forget to put one option being "none of the above." When the disciples were waiting for the Holy Spirit to come, on Pentecost, their preconceived perceptions of "how things should be" was that there should be 12 apostles - and not there were only 11. So what did they do? All 120 or so of them had a big discussion about criteria for selection, then went through a list of (male) individuals who would fit the criteria, narrowed down to 2, and said "OK, we'll "flip a coin" and the Spirit of God can choose!" It didn't enter their minds that maybe God was thinking of someone who was not even known to them. That God could work outside the scope of their criteria, and their little preconceived notions, simply didn't register in their heads. And that is how it sometimes is with us. One thing that is quite common with us, is our picture of God as someone who should be serving us, the way we want to be served. But he owes us nothing! Our perception of God is so totally inadequate.

I waited 40 years to understand why God had let me go through a traumatic event. And it was only when I watched close hand how hundreds of others handled their own trauma, that pennies started to drip in my very slow brain. And only then did I begin to see, and become very thankful, why my trauma was so important. Let me reassure you two things: 1: God can turn any process or event into something constructive and beneficial to those who follow him (Rom 8:28) 2: you will miss out on nothing that is good for you, if you follow him (Psalm 84:11). You can't lose!!!! Accept it.

Asking is something we do. Answering is something He does. And he DOES. But are you listening in the right direction? Are you tuned in to the right wavelength? Are you on the right "webpage?" Are you REALLY living by faith, really believing that he LOVES you, or are you defining how he must demonstrate his love - because that is neither love nor faith, and it leads to totally misplaced hope. Which will lead in turn to disappointment bitterness, rejection, and getting yet farther away from an answer. Take hope from the promise that he will not place you in a situation with which you cannot cope! You think you "just can't be kept in the dark any longer." He knows exactly how much you can take in terms of frustration. He's not testing you with that, but he has promised always that there will be a solution to that frustration - if it's not an answer you recognise as such, it will be something else. Let go of your preconceived multiple choices, REST in God and trust Him. Then wait EXPECTANTLY for a surprise!

May God give you grace, and peace of mind, and a new dosage of trust in his wisdom and love for you! He is there and He is NOT silent!

Hey there. Thanks for the reply. It’s sad how you’re reply is the only helpful one in this thread. But I’m already sad, so it doesn’t make it any worse.

What you have said raises my faith, but do you have any theories on situations like mine? My mother has once told me that this girl is not someone that she likes at all. Maybe if we ever end up together it will be a nightmare. But that’s only guesses after all.

JordanL103 · Jun 24, 2020

FutureAndAHope said:
I once had a situation where I felt God bought some one into my life, then took them away again. It broke me deeply, to the point I nearly committed suicide. However move forward some years I am now happily married to some one else, I have kids, and a family. I can see God's hand on my new relationship, I believe he bought my current wife to me. Try not live in maybes, or the past, move forward into what can be.

Some times we can feel like our light has been put out:

Lam 3:2 He hath led me and caused me to walk in darkness, and not in light.

Yet as we put our hearts in God's hand, we will come out of that dark place.

Mic 7:7-8 But as for me, I will look unto Jehovah; I will wait for the God of my salvation: my God will hear me. Rejoice not against me, O mine enemy: when I fall, I shall arise; when I sit in darkness, Jehovah will be a light unto me.

Thank you so much for the reply. I really would like to move forward, but we humans need answers. And it seems like there is no way for me to move forward without it. I just wish God would make me understand the bigger picture so I can move on. It’s torture.

JordanL103 · Jun 24, 2020

Michie said:
Online relationship I assume?

Yes you are right. And what’s funny is that even though she is someone that I’ve never met, my mother has already disqualified her. So yes maybe she is someone that God does not want me to take the risk with, but that’s just all guesses. I still don’t understand why I have to go through this. If she is not the right fit, why give me the chance to get to know her for so long?

JordanL103 · Jun 24, 2020

Dear Kristen our moderator, if you can see this thread please remove all of those non helpful replies from my thread.

Bobber · Jun 25, 2020

JordanL103 said:
Hello everyone, I would like to share something that has tortured me for years. And forgive me for not going into too much details, I just want to know why this suffering won’t end and why it is even like this. So basically the situation is, I fell in deep love with someone I will never be able to meet (as of now at least, I can’t predict the future)

So you say you've been upset for sometime because you fell in love with someone and it didn't work out. Been there many, many years ago myself. And if we're going to use words like tortured remember that Jesus was tortued for you and me too! Spikes in the hands and feet and a spear in the side....plus...other things. My point? There may be times we have to take up a cross and follow him.

I just want to know why God has put that special someone in my life, but yet makes it impossible to go see them. I hope no one ever goes through this torture.

Well my friend you asking something and you said don't even ask questions. Some may need to be asked as in is she a Christian believer number 1! Not saying she isn't but if she isn't sorry but you may not be able to claim God put that person into your life. And even if she's a believer how committed and those things can be a factor. In my own story I wanted to marry someone and she went and married someone else. I was broken hearted oh I'd say for two years. As time progressed my relationship with God moved ahead....God began to teach me many great things about his kingdom and in ways to develop strength in spirit. (I won't get into detail)

You know what? I came to learn this young lady resisted and stood against what I considered more accurate teaching and in looking back if we had been together struggles for sure would have come about. I'm so glad it didn't go the way where we were together, as there's so many things we wouldn't have in common. GOD KNOWS THE FUTURE. Are we willing to trust him that he sees things we don't? Eventually I took seriously what God said about praying for a wife and believing he'd bring her my way and one night I attended a home Bible study and in the door she walked. Never met her before in my life but God put into my spirit that very moment she'd be my wife....and he did the same for her too. We've now been married 40 years.

JordanL103 · Jun 25, 2020

Bobber said:
So you say you've been upset for sometime because you fell in love with someone and it didn't work out. Been there many, many years ago myself. And if we're going to use words like tortured remember that Jesus was tortued for you and me too! Spikes in the hands and feet and a spear in the side....plus...other things. My point? There may be times we have to take up a cross and follow him.

Well my friend you asking something and you said don't even ask questions. Some may need to be asked as in is she a Christian believer number 1! Not saying she isn't but if she isn't sorry but you may not be able to claim God put that person into your life. And even if she's a believer how committed and those things can be a factor. In my own story I wanted to marry someone and she went and married someone else. I was broken hearted oh I'd say for two years. As time progressed my relationship with God moved ahead....God began to teach me many great things about his kingdom and in ways to develop strength in spirit. (I won't get into detail)

You know what? I came to learn this young lady resisted and stood against what I considered more accurate teaching and in looking back if we had been together struggles for sure would have come about. I'm so glad it didn't go the way where we were together, as there's so many things we wouldn't have in common. GOD KNOWS THE FUTURE. Are we willing to trust him that he sees things we don't? Eventually I took seriously what God said about praying for a wife and believing he'd bring her my way and one night I attended a home Bible study and in the door she walked. Never met her before in my life but God put into my spirit that very moment she'd be my wife....and he did the same for her too. We've now been married 40 years.

Hi friend. Thank you for the reply. To answer your question, yes, she is actually a Christian also. But the feelings I have is very very deep, and I need closure and answers. I need to know why If I don’t then I’ll just keep having those torturous thoughts like I mentioned in my original post. I need someone to help me with that. No one should be able to suffer for such a long time. I have prayed and prayed and asked and talked to god just for an answer, but strangely, he never replied back to me. And this is making me lose my faith. I can’t just live with the fact that I cannot even meet someone that I have put in so much effort, so much feelings and such a strong connection with, at least give me that closure. Let me see what she is really like, what kind of girl that I’ve been talking with for such long time. How could god torture someone like that? I’m feeling like even if a miracle happens now, and that I do get an answer, it’s still killing me because all of those precious years wasted.
This will kill me no matter what. And I cannot go on with my life without feeling like my heart is being fried on a lan every second.

Maybe if we ever got together it will be a nightmare, and my mother does not even approve of her. But so what? All of this is just assumptions. I want things to at least actually happen

And I have such strong feeling that god has put her into my life, (I’ve talked to god about this and I can feel it in my heart) but I don’t know why things turned out this way.

Help me brother....I don’t even feel like I can push through to the day where things finally magically works out and makes sense. I’m so done with having to go through this. Just set me free

JordanL103 · Jun 25, 2020

SkyWriting said:
You should work on how you deal with "torture."
That's what you control. Think about how you would
prefer to deal with torture. Make plans to think about
your thinking at least once a day. And know that each
step, you will know more.

The only way I would “prefer” to deal with this torture is if everything worked out and made sense

turkle · Jun 25, 2020

JordanL103 said:
Hello everyone, I would like to share something that has tortured me for years. And forgive me for not going into too much details, I just want to know why this suffering won’t end and why it is even like this. So basically the situation is, I fell in deep love with someone I will never be able to meet (as of now at least, I can’t predict the future)
Please don’t ask any questions, I have way too many questions of my own. And as you can guess, struggles like this can lead to severe depression and mental illness.
I just want to know why God has put that special someone in my life, but yet makes it impossible to go see them. I hope no one ever goes through this torture.
I have wondered and wondered, is it because something better is waiting? Or is it because God thinks I’m not ready yet? I know no one really knows God’s plan and intentions, but I’m human, and I need an answer. I need reasons. Explanations. I can’t keep going on without knowing WHY. I honestly do believe that God has a plan for everyone that is for the ultimate good, because I’ve experienced it many times. But for severe issues like this, I can’t just be kept in the unknown. But where do I go find the answer at all? I just can’t get over it.
I have prayed and asked for answers, but it never came. I’m still stuck deep in this pain.
This has came to a point where I question the existence of God. This makes me question everything. It makes me feel like my life is a lie. It’s horrible. Because all my life I’ve seen the wonderful works of God, I’ve seen miracles. And I do believe these very much. But how come this one doesn’t come with a solution? Why does this has to happen? I just wanna live a normal life like everyone. Be with the one I love. But God has made it impossible. If so, what’s the point of putting this special person in my life? Just to have fun and torture me? I feel such a deep connection to this person, like I never ever had before. And yet I can’t progress with them, and I do seriously ask God, how will he give back all these wasted precious years.
maybe one of you can be the messenger of God and tell me something. Because I need it. I need the affirmations, I need a reason for me to keep having faith and not crash. Because I’ve had it.
I just wanna drive over and go visit and see them, but why is God stopping me?
I am very satisfied and grateful with everything else about the life God has gave me.

In my experience, God rarely tells us the "why". That's why we have to have faith, and to trust Him. If He told us everything, we wouldn't need faith, would we? God is faithful and good. But if we lose faith because we aren't getting something we want, that means that our faith is about getting things for ourselves. It is not about worshiping Him for who He is.

I know that it feels good to believe that God has placed someone in your life for you to build a life with, but I think it's more truthful to say that God brings many people in our lives, and we choose whom we get close to. We have free will. I seriously doubt that God specifically placed this person in your life under apparently impossible circumstances in order to torture you. That is not His way. More likely you chose to spend online time with this person, and allowed yourself to get emotionally involved despite the fact that the odds are against you. God tells us that we are to be wise. That means we have a choice to do wisely or not. This is not God's fault that you are miserable. You chose this impossible relationship.

I had a long distance relationship once that I realized could never move forward for many complicated reasons. I chose to end it, despite my extreme emotions. It was devastating, and I suffered horribly. I realized as the smoke cleared that I had let myself get pulled into something that was terribly foolish, because like your case, it was impossible. It took a long time, but eventually I saw clearer and realized that it was the best thing in the end. That didn't lessen the pain, but I was much wiser.

From the way you write, I'm guessing that you are very young. It is normal to have a your heart broken in your youth. Most of us have. You will survive. God will see you through if you turn to Him, not in anger for not getting your way, but in faith and gratitude knowing that He loves you and cares for you. Don't let your disappointment turn you away in anger. If you follow Him closely, He will lead the way to something unexpected. But you need to lay all your desires down at His feet and trust that He will direct you in the best way. He is faithful to do so.

JordanL103 · Jun 25, 2020

turkle said:
In my experience, God rarely tells us the "why". That's why we have to have faith, and to trust Him. If He told us everything, we wouldn't need faith, would we? God is faithful and good. But if we lose faith because we aren't getting something we want, that means that our faith is about getting things for ourselves. It is not about worshiping Him for who He is.

I know that it feels good to believe that God has placed someone in your life for you to build a life with, but I think it's more truthful to say that God brings many people in our lives, and we choose whom we get close to. We have free will. I seriously doubt that God specifically placed this person in your life under apparently impossible circumstances in order to torture you. That is not His way. More likely you chose to spend online time with this person, and allowed yourself to get emotionally involved despite the fact that the odds are against you. God tells us that we are to be wise. That means we have a choice to do wisely or not. This is not God's fault that you are miserable. You chose this impossible relationship.

I had a long distance relationship once that I realized could never move forward for many complicated reasons. I chose to end it, despite my extreme emotions. It was devastating, and I suffered horribly. I realized as the smoke cleared that I had let myself get pulled into something that was terribly foolish, because like your case, it was impossible. It took a long time, but eventually I saw clearer and realized that it was the best thing in the end. That didn't lessen the pain, but I was much wiser.

From the way you write, I'm guessing that you are very young. It is normal to have a your heart broken in your youth. Most of us have. You will survive. God will see you through if you turn to Him, not in anger for not getting your way, but in faith and gratitude knowing that He loves you and cares for you. Don't let your disappointment turn you away in anger. If you follow Him closely, He will lead the way to something unexpected. But you need to lay all your desires down at His feet and trust that He will direct you in the best way. He is faithful to do so.

The second I started talking to this person it’s like something weird hit me. I had no intention of even getting to know her let along having feelings. But it’s just like it happens in a magical way. There’s gotta be a reason. I don’t care what anyone says. And no, believing in god does not mean only doing things that are “possible” that sounds foolish and is even against what the Bible says. Isn’t god the almighty? God has plans for us, everything in our life he made it happen. And I know there’s a reason for EVERYTHING. You don’t even have to be a spiritual person to know this

“God specifically placed this person in your life under apparently impossible circumstances in order to torture you. ”

This basically sums up how I’m feeling 100%

JordanL103 · Jun 25, 2020

Michie said:
Online relationship I assume?

Yes. Unfortunately it has turned into quite an nightmare hell. As you can see in my replies.....

JordanL103 · Jun 25, 2020

Usually this forum is my go to place in situations like this. But this time it has really disappointed.

I want to know God’s purpose for this struggle

Member

The Librarian

Active Member

Well-Known Member

Well-Known Member

Well-Known Member

Just me

Well-Known Member

Well-Known Member

Member

Member

Member

Member

Well-Known Member

Member

Member

Blessed

Member

Member

Member

Similar threads