I am terrified. All I can think about is this virus that's going around.
So sorry Jesse - I've read your posts from time to time and always admired you. It is a scary thing, but I really see it as being meant to be a humbling thing. It's a good time to turn to God and ask 'what about me, and our relationship?' All the distractions have been taken away, all the places are shut. We can then either bathe in fear or in faith.
Jesus said: Luke 12:4-6
4 I tell you, My friends, do not be afraid of those who kill the body and after that can do no more. 5 But I will show you whom you should fear: Fear the One who, after you have been killed, has authority to throw you into hell. Yes, I tell you, fear Him! 6 Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies?b Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. 7 And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So do not be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.
So the virus, it can kill the body but nothing more. But the
situation of the virus, it will reveal the soul of the person within the body - is it selfish, obsessesed with losing its things and its money, defending what is has? does it give thought to God and helping its fellow man? It has revealed a lot about myself over the last couple months, things I haven't really liked. I stocked more than food, I stocked weapons and made plans to use them if there were intruders or social disturbances. And then I had to ask myself - who is defending this house? Me? Or Christ?
It is scary, I don't know your personal situation but I am 48 and a smoker, and my fiance is 61 and a smoker, so neither of us want to be exposed to this. So we don't go out much. We are fortunate to have stocked early and able to order things online that we might need. The bigger threat though is to become irritated and unloving towards each other in the middle of the stress, or to prepare for things that may never happen, and to prepare for them in such a way that would anger God (to prepare to do violence, to prepare to do evil rather than to respond with love)
The virus though is not supernatural in it's contagion. It is not a poison gas attack. We still walk the dog. I'll meet with a friend today who needs some company, but keep my distance. I carry a bottle of water that has 2 tablespoons of bleach in it, if I need to go anywhere and touch anything, I use that before I get back into my car or entering the house again. Then I know with reasonable certainty that my hands and my car and my house and myself are safe. Also, my community is safe, I am doing my part and not acting foolishly. That's all I have to do really (to my mind). God will take care of the rest. The more important thing is to keep my relationship with Him right. My life and my things will come to an end anyway whether it is this year by this virus or some other year by some other end, so 'store up for yourself treasures in heaven'.
Anyway, God bless you - I hope you are able to relax a little. Love and peace to you.