How virgin men and women can stay pure

Thanks for the heads up.

I've been looking at chastity masks but can't seem to find anything suitable. Do you think it would be a good idea?

Something like this:

.

CharismaticLady said:

The number one reason dating couples fall into sexual impurity is passionate kissing. Passionate kissing causes premature emotions not based on reality but on fantasy. Save the passion for marriage. Give yourself time to really know someone as friends with common interests.

Click to expand...

Reality is very different

I don't understand why this particular sin is the most talked about, cherry picked, and hung up over.

It's better to just get it out of your system so you can hurry up and move on. It's not even that great anyway. Food is better, and you all eat plenty of that to excess (also a sin).

ReesePiece23 said:

I don't understand why this particular sin is the most talked about, cherry picked, and hung up over.

It's better to just get it out of your system so you can hurry up and move on. It's not even that great anyway. Food is better, and you all eat plenty of that to excess (also a sin).

Click to expand...

As believers it's different because we have the Holy Spirit living inside our bodies so we're His temples. Paul talked about the distinction between this and other sins in one of the letters to the Corinth church.

But what about drug use or over eating? Doesn't that abuse the body too? IDK.

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) said:

As believers it's different because we have the Holy Spirit living inside our bodies so we're His temples. Paul talked about the distinction between this and other sins in one of the letters to the Corinth church.

But what about drug use or over eating? Doesn't that abuse the body too? IDK.

Click to expand...

It reads more like sound advice to me, from a man who was gifted with self-control in particular. He even admits that celibacy was HIS strength. Like tenacity was Job's.

I'm not looking for a debate, I've literally just dusted that verse off. It makes for interesting reading. Seeing what each individual brought to the bible always fascinates me.

I would like to add that this same advice applies to non-virgin Christians who are currently single. The reason fornication is talked about so much is because it is a need we all have and that many believers struggle with, to varying degrees. We need to eat and we have a sex drive. Most people will never struggle with drugs or alcohol but many will struggle with food and sex. And no, I'm not saying that we all need sex; I'm only saying that we all have a sex drive and that we need to control ourselves instead of it controlling us. Same as with food, as ReesePiece23 mentioned.

The_wanderer 40 said:

I would like to add that this same advice applies to non-virgin Christians who are currently single. The reason fornication is talked about so much is because it is a need we all have and that many believers struggle with, to varying degrees. We need to eat and we have a sex drive. Most people will never struggle with drugs or alcohol but many will struggle with food and sex. And no, I'm not saying that we all need sex; I'm only saying that we all have a sex drive and that we need to control ourselves instead of it controlling us. Same as with food, as ReesePiece23 mentioned.

Click to expand...

In all honesty, if you offered me a woman to have sex with or a couple of tabs of LSD, I'd 100% take the LSD, every time. I'm not necessarily a drug user either, it's just that one is more interesting to me than the other. I'd want to venture far beyond the parameters of existentialism and discover new dimensions...

... It's just as well that my relationship with Jesus is 10,000% better than anything else, otherwise it'd be a pretty confusing life for me. And that's what it comes down to. My relationship with Jesus is just better than anything else. At least to me, anyway. Everything else is crap.

CharismaticLady said:

Passionate kissing causes premature emotions not based on reality but on fantasy. Save the passion for marriage.

Click to expand...

If passion is foolish, I would not have it or save what I do well not to have.

CharismaticLady said:

But not everyone is like that.

Click to expand...

Exactly > not everyone gives in to foolish passion. I think God's love has passion, but with His self control.

CharismaticLady said:

If fornication is what you were referring to that doesn't say much for your character if you are just using women. Yikes.

Click to expand...

I've been single since 2012 and have (for reasons of my own) abstained since - I've barely even hugged a woman since becoming Christian... In 2012. Not only was on an incredibly fulfilling path of self discovery (travelling, meeting new friends, finding new passions, making a new life for myself) I was also growing up and seeing the world in greater depths. (Did I fornicate in the days before finding my faith, yes. But it's not 2009/10 anymore.)

The fact that I've remained celibate is a complete byproduct of the above. I've been getting on with life, I've been on a great journey with Him, I've not been sanctimoniously condescending, or ignorantly judging people I have never met.

I treat all women like a niece, a sister or even a daughter. Funnily enough, not all of us men have sex on the brain all of the time. Some of us are just trying to leave a legacy for the next generation, so that our lives weren't completely pointless.

Maybe you should think long and hard the next time you type out a post - you're lucky I was nice.

The way I see it, self control is a virtue regardless whether one has had sex before. Self control has its own rewards, including less drama, avoiding STDs, no out of wedlock pregnancies, etc. These are legitimate physical and mental/emotional health benefits for not sleeping around. Even among atheists, there are those who reserve sex for marriage. It's a sensible choice. They just don't make as big a fuss about it.

Ironically, I think making a big deal about not fornicating can make it more difficult to avoid. It can sometimes get in the way of making rational, responsible, life decisions.

Its a lot more difficult for me. Especially as my owner has refused to get me seen by the vet! Phew!

CharismaticLady said:

Maybe you need to edit your original post so it is more clear. This is much better, and I agree. I'm celibate also.

Click to expand...

Well, I'm sort of celibate by accident really. As I say, I found Him (Jesus) and uncovered all of these new talents and ways of thinking, so I've just kind of kept myself busy for all of these years. My previous life looked incredibly dull, grey and banal by comparison after 2012 hit. I found my faith - and then all of a sudden I was awake and seeing the world in colour. And you know how THAT is, once you've experienced that feeling of being awake, you always want it. I didn't care for anything else. So then it wasn't that hard for me to carrying on living life without sex.

Naturally - in living in this awakened state, I wanted to go on a mission of self discovery. I just so happen to still be here nearly a decade later, enjoying it just as much as I was back then.

Miles hit on a great point about the emotional ramifications of sleeping around - because it does cause a lot of damage to a person's psyche (I was only happy in the moment; everything else in life sucked at the time). I'm just lucky that since my last girlfriend, I've manged to develop an almost universal love across the human race. It feels a bit like an international brotherhood and sisterhood - I feel a sense of responsibility in society. Yeah, I guess travelling helped with that.

See a theme? Give yourself a purpose and everything 'tempting' seems a lot easier to avoid - to the point that you're actually a reformed character. I was probably at one time a sex addict (with girls who were also addicts) and now, it's been ten/eleven years, and I don't really care for it.

My earlier point is that it's possibly better to sin, admit you're not perfect and repent, than it is to let something dominate your life. Good advice? Possibly not. But then I'm a believer in trail and error, mistakes are good but ONLY if they serve as an important lesson. If not, then, well...

Sorry if I startled you earlier, I think there's just been a fundamental misunderstanding (I'm not a fan of forcing information, I think it's important people find out for themselves.) I shouldn't have been so impassioned about it.

CharismaticLady said:

The number one reason dating couples fall into sexual impurity is passionate kissing. Passionate kissing causes premature emotions not based on reality but on fantasy. Save the passion for marriage. Give yourself time to really know someone as friends with common interests.

Click to expand...

Are we talking about this again?