- Jul 30, 2019
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have you ever been put off dating someone after meeting their family?
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have you ever been put off dating someone after meeting their family?
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Sketcher
Born Imperishable
You can say that. I happened to have become acquainted with a person who makes very poor decisions due to being mentally ill, and is constantly harmed by the consequences of those decisions. As in, he's gotten himself arrested for not harming other people, or for using drugs. He's also the kind of person you don't want to talk to for more than two minutes.
He has a younger sister who is pretty and seems to be all there, and is still single. I assume it's because of him. She'd probably insist on being there for him and offering him a room if and when the bottom falls out for him again. Plus there's Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter for family holidays. Coming between a spouse and her family - that doesn't go well. That's what's kept me from pursuing her specifically, anyway.
He has a younger sister who is pretty and seems to be all there, and is still single. I assume it's because of him. She'd probably insist on being there for him and offering him a room if and when the bottom falls out for him again. Plus there's Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter for family holidays. Coming between a spouse and her family - that doesn't go well. That's what's kept me from pursuing her specifically, anyway.
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com7fy8
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Well, Jesus does want us to love any and all people. But I don't think this means He expects us to manage and take care of someone who is dangerous, not cooperative, and abusive. So, in case she is really requiring that someone else help to take care of him while he is abusive and dishonest . . . may be she is not so with it, after all.
I can meet a family, then I discover how a lady expects me to relate with them . . . if and how much she expects me to go along with how they are wrong, or how she is helping me to reach them for Jesus if they are not of God.
If someone expects you to go along with and help people with their wrong lives, I would not buy this. She can be prayerful to find out what God has her do. And there will be other people who are not loving and caring people; she will need to find out prayerfully how to deal with them, also, while making sure she keeps doing what God wants for loving any and all people.
We are here to love any and all people, not to just try to help some one person who does not cooperate with the right kind of help.
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Sketcher
Born Imperishable
It doesn't seem to touch on any of what you said. I don't like the guy, grave misfortune seems to follow him because of the decisions he makes, and I wouldn't want to share a roof with him. I don't think he'd be a good example to children either. I think she would be just as devoted to him as any normal person would be to a sibling, and I can easily see him in a position of need from someone stable - like his other siblings, including her. Simple as that.
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Miles
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- Mar 6, 2005
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Yes. It's a factor. Marriage joins two families together. Her family will become family to me, and mine will become family to her, so it's something to consider. A lot also depends on how she handles her relationship with her family. Although it's a factor, it isn't everything.
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- Jul 21, 2019
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Yes. A woman's family, her friends, and how she interacts with strangers are all factors (or were) for me. I would expect to be evaluated the exact same way from any woman I am interested in. My family, friends, and how I treat strangers says volumes more about "who" I am than I can say myself with words.
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When you marry a person, their family becomes your family. So I have always taken a good look at who they are before getting serious about dating a person. I broke off an engagement partially based on my fiance's mother and how she treated me. Mostly, I have not had a chance to meet the family before dating them.
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