I am going on a date tomorrow: what are the 3 major things not to do or say?

J Daniel · Sep 15, 2019

So I am going on a date with a woman from church a met.

We clicked pretty much right away.

I was attracted to her; and I went to go get her!

Feels like a while since I have been out - with a woman - what are the 3 majors things to not do or say? (barring the obvious things like touching etc etc).

timothyu · Sep 15, 2019

1- Don't keep making the conversation about you
2- How you treat others (like a waiter/ress) will be a tell of your character
3- Don't mention there may be a cure soon

Elliewaves · Sep 15, 2019

First of all, good for you! So many never take the first step of asking someone out or getting dates. Don't talk about yourself too much and don't chew with your mouth open .

bèlla · Sep 15, 2019

Don’t...

1. Talk about your ex.
2. Talk about your struggles with women.
3. Talk about marriage.

Christ is Lord · Sep 15, 2019

1. Be yourself but don't be a werido

2. Don't ask too many question because it will start feeling like an interrogation
3. Relax. If you over think things too much you might end of coming off in a way that's not reflective of who you truly are.

Best of luck, mate.

J Daniel · Sep 15, 2019

Elliewaves said:
First of all, good for you! So many never take the first step of asking someone out or getting dates. Don't talk about yourself too much and don't chew with your mouth open .

Thanks.

@LaBèlla made it clear she likes men that are forward - you get nowhere sitting on the sidelines looking onwards.

Yes never chew with mouth open.

bèlla · Sep 15, 2019

J Daniel said:
@LaBèlla made it clear she likes men that are forward - you get nowhere sitting on the sidelines looking onwards.

Godly leadership is never timid. Enjoy your date.

Lost4words · Sep 15, 2019

Keep your tongue in and dont drool
Dont go sniffing her butt
Treat her as top dog

timothyu · Sep 15, 2019

Lost4words said:
Keep your tongue in and dont drool

Dont go sniffing her butt

Clean your teeth!

And remember a doggy bag is for extra food, not clean-up on the walk home.

J Daniel · Sep 16, 2019

No1 and No3 are the don't SHE brought up and spoke about.

It was a nice date!

She asked me some excellent questions! (questions of a LONG TERM nature which I did like)

We ate out; then we played bowling and went shopping with her (she shopped not me lol).

But big question is - after that date is do I see her as a long term partner? Yes.

I do want to go on further dates with her.

We really like each other a lot which is great.

But as a work colleague told me after my past issue STAND UP IN LOVE NEVER FALL IN LOVE!

LaBèlla said:
Don’t...

1. Talk about your ex.
2. Talk about your struggles with women.
3. Talk about marriage.

bèlla · Sep 16, 2019

J Daniel said:
No1 and No3 are the don't SHE brought up and spoke about.

Did you share as well?

It was a nice date!

I’m glad you enjoyed yourself.

She asked me some excellent questions! (questions of a LONG TERM nature which I did like)

Do you feel you’re on the same page?

But big question is - after that date is do I see her as a long term partner? Yes.

Keeping getting acquainted. Share little things and big things according to your comfort as the connection progresses.

Live the moments.

timothyu · Sep 16, 2019

J Daniel said:
But as a work colleague told me after my past issue STAND UP IN LOVE NEVER FALL IN LOVE!

True, the both of you need to retain your individual identities and be good friends first and foremost.

J Daniel · Sep 17, 2019

LaBèlla said:
Did you share as well?

Yes I did as she was open I was too! She certainly gave me food for thought.

LaBèlla said:
Do you feel you’re on the same page?

For the most part we are - some things we have disagreement about i.e. on what ground a family should be started etc (and that is GREAT cos being in a yes relationship sucks!) but the main things we do agree on (of course she is a believer).

LaBèlla said:
I’m glad you enjoyed yourself.

It was good and the great thing was the conversation was not just about her and I it was about God too and the Bible and that was really great!

LaBèlla said:
Keeping getting acquainted. Share little things and big things according to your comfort as the connection progresses.

Indeed.

LaBèlla said:
Live the moments.

I did take charge @ bowling and hugged her from behind - kissing on her neck (it was all good - with wide smile on her face!)

But I am glad I get to know her OUTSIDE of the church too and she's feminine (NOT FEMINIST you know the difference!) so yeah as @timothyu said - keep individual and build friendship - and strong friendship is the core of any relationship!

timewerx · Sep 17, 2019

The worst things you can say on a date:

"Will you marry me"
"I like to have many babies"
"Do you have rabies?"

timewerx · Sep 17, 2019

Christ is Lord said:
1. Be yourself but don't be a werido

If I can't be be anything else but being a weirdo, can I still be myself?

timewerx · Sep 17, 2019

timothyu said:
1- Don't keep making the conversation about you

Elliewaves said:
Don't talk about yourself too much and don't chew with your mouth open .

Can I talk about tornadoes?

timewerx · Sep 17, 2019

timothyu said:
True, the both of you need to retain your individual identities and be good friends first and foremost.

Yes, you don't have to put up a show to impress a woman. Only cheaters do this because all they want is have sex, no intention of serious relationship.

You won't be able to keep it up if you end up getting married. You want a woman who is impressed by who you really are.

bèlla · Sep 17, 2019

J Daniel said:
For the most part we are - some things we have disagreement about i.e. on what ground a family should be started etc (and that is GREAT cos being in a yes relationship sucks!) but the main things we do agree on (of course she is a believer).

You handled this well. Sometimes openness can be off putting to the other and many warn against it for that reason. When she demonstrated her willingness to address meatier topics you didn’t rebuff her and the end result was mutual sharing.

Honesty is best. But transparency only works when you’re in the right company. It seems that was the case for you both.

It was good and the great thing was the conversation was not just about her and I it was about God too and the Bible and that was really great!

That’s a healthy mix. Next time you meet ask her about prayer. You want a partner who is prayerful. She will labor on behalf of you and your family.

But I am glad I get to know her OUTSIDE of the church too and she's feminine (NOT FEMINIST you know the difference!)

Everyone is on their best behavior at church. Seeing her in normal settings is good. Your gesture has clarified your intentions so there’s no confusion.

A feminine woman is a wonder to behold. Treasure your time with her.

J Daniel · Sep 17, 2019

LaBèlla said:
Honesty is best. But transparency only works when you’re in the right company. It seems that was the case for you both.

Yes definitely!

LaBèlla said:
That’s a healthy mix. Next time you meet ask her about prayer. You want a partner who is prayerful. She will labor on behalf of you and your family.

Yes prayer is important of course.

LaBèlla said:
Your gesture has clarified your intentions so there’s no confusion.

Guess you mean the hugging from behind ^_^

but yeah no confusion but she was still very feminine and dignified with was great.

Anyway - I have another issue I am dealing with atm ¬_¬ (if it is not one thing it is something else lol)

LaBèlla said:
A feminine woman is a wonder to behold. Treasure your time with her.

Amen.

bèlla · Sep 17, 2019

J Daniel said:
Guess you mean the hugging from behind but yeah no confusion but she was still very feminine and dignified with was great.

When the relating is friendly and pleasant it can leave the other questioning your interest in something more. Hugging or taking a woman’s hand is a demonstrative sign of interest. ;-)

Anyway - I have another issue I am dealing with atm ¬_¬ (if it is not one thing it is something else lol)

Don’t let it get you down. The unexpected has happened and will continue to occur when you walk with Him.

I am going on a date tomorrow: what are the 3 major things not to do or say?

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