I only experience emotions in dreams

timewerx · Aug 8, 2019

Has anyone heard of this condition before?

I have this condition and barely feel emotion when I'm conscious. Even for highly dramatic events.

I very barely feel sadness, sorrow, fear, happiness, etc. If I do, only for a very fleeting moment and then it's gone (I think my brain is automatically reacting to suppress my emotions). I used to feel emotions fully, but for the last several years, I've lost my emotions progressively. I can't even remember how they feel.

I still express emotions by acting so I look normal to other people. But it's an act, I don't genuinely feel emotions.

Here's the very interesting part.

When I dream in my sleep, I can feel emotions again in full! I cry for "real" in the dream. But when I wake up, I remember the dream but not the feelings.

It's very hard to describe what I'm "feeling" right now. Since I can barely feel any emotion. It's like trying to look for something you used to have and now is lost.

devin553344 · Aug 8, 2019

Do you hurt when people do wrong against you? If you do then your feelings are still intact.

timewerx · Aug 8, 2019

Has anyone watched the episode "Unamatrix Zero" in Star Trek Voyager series?

What the Borg drones are experiencing with Unamatrix Zero is very similar to my experience. Unamatrix zero is like a collective dream. So when these cyborgs who normally don't feel any emotions get into the Unamatrix Zero dream (when they're recharging), they begin to feel emotions again and behave like normal people (not like zombies).

But as soon as their recharge cycle ends and they wake up, they behave like cyborgs again without memories of the dream.

I do remember the dream, but not the feelings of emotions.

Unimatrix Zero

timewerx · Aug 8, 2019

devin553344 said:
Do you hurt when people do wrong against you? If you do then your feelings are still intact.

I used to. But it became more and more fleeting. Until I can barely feel it.

What motivates my reactions nowadays is mostly logic based on present beliefs / principles.

devin553344 · Aug 8, 2019

timewerx said:
I used to. But it became more and more fleeting. Until I can barely feel it.

What motivates my reactions nowadays is mostly logic based on present beliefs / principles.

I've heard of that before. There was another poster that said he could not feel emotions. Alexithymia sounds like a different condition than what your describing. But you could read up on that. It's similar so it might be helpful.

Lost4words · Aug 8, 2019

If i showed you my teeth and barked you would scream buddy!

Dave-W · Aug 8, 2019

timewerx said:
Has anyone watched the episode "Unamatrix Zero" in Star Trek Voyager series?

What the Borg drones are experiencing with Unamatrix Zero is very similar to my experience. Unamatrix zero is like a collective dream. So when these cyborgs who normally don't feel any emotions get into the Unamatrix Zero dream (when they're recharging), they begin to feel emotions again and behave like normal people (not like zombies).

But as soon as their recharge cycle ends and they wake up, they behave like cyborgs again without memories of the dream.

I do remember the dream, but not the feelings of emotions.

Unimatrix Zero

Yes indeed. really liked that episode.

And I can relate. My dad beat emotions out of me at an early age. So from my experience, it is some kind of mental block in your conscious mind which keeps you from actually feeling, and that filter is not in your subconscious. But that is only a guess based on my own experience. I could still feel some, but there was a total disconnect with being able to express it. Like you I could fake it to look normal, but it was an act.

It has taken a lot of years of prayer to get me to be emotionally connected again, but it is still far from complete.

Tom 1 · Aug 8, 2019

timewerx said:
Has anyone heard of this condition before?

I have this condition and barely feel emotion when I'm conscious. Even for highly dramatic events.

I very barely feel sadness, sorrow, fear, happiness, etc. If I do, only for a very fleeting moment and then it's gone (I think my brain is automatically reacting to suppress my emotions). I used to feel emotions fully, but for the last several years, I've lost my emotions progressively. I can't even remember how they feel.

I still express emotions by acting so I look normal to other people. But it's an act, I don't genuinely feel emotions.

Here's the very interesting part.

When I dream in my sleep, I can feel emotions again in full! I cry for "real" in the dream. But when I wake up, I remember the dream but not the feelings.

It's very hard to describe what I'm "feeling" right now. Since I can barely feel any emotion. It's like trying to look for something you used to have and now is lost.

Maybe that's an indication that it's a psychological issue rather than part of your physical make up?

Ophiolite · Aug 8, 2019

Can you identify any event, or change of circumstances that coincided with this loss of emotions?

timewerx · Aug 8, 2019

Dave-W said:
Yes indeed. really liked that episode.

And I can relate. My dad beat emotions out of me at an early age. So from my experience, it is some kind of mental block in your conscious mind which keeps you from actually feeling, and that filter is not in your subconscious. But that is only a guess based on my own experience. I could still feel some, but there was a total disconnect with being able to express it. Like you I could fake it to look normal, but it was an act.

It has taken a lot of years of prayer to get me to be emotionally connected again, but it is still far from complete.

I'm sorry to hear. Fortunately, I didn't have much traumatic experience during childhood. I had on one occassion but didnt cause me to lose emotions. I'm well into my 30's when I started losing them.

Do you still feel them a lot more whenever you dream?

Dave-W · Aug 8, 2019

timewerx said:
Do you still feel them a lot more whenever you dream?

For me it has usually been about the same.

timewerx · Aug 8, 2019

Ophiolite said:
Can you identify any event, or change of circumstances that coincided with this loss of emotions?

I can't seem to find anything as I lost my emotions over many years progressively.

The irony is I wanted to experience them no matter how bad the emotion is like sorrow. I can only get a glimpse of it in dreams.

timewerx · Aug 8, 2019

Dave-W said:
For me it has usually been about the same.

INteresting. For me, I'm a completely normal, perhaps even too emotional in dreams.

I can't remember the feeling but I do know that I want it so badly.

Ophiolite · Aug 8, 2019

timewerx said:
I can't seem to find anything as I lost my emotions over many years progressively.

The irony is I wanted to experience them no matter how bad the emotion is like sorrow. I can only get a glimpse of it in dreams.

Let me pursue that a little further. Setting aside this loss of emotions, is your life today better than/worse than/same as it was ten years ago, in terms of work, financial situation, friends, family, etc.? Or, are you unable to separate any change in your "life satisfaction" from the loss of emotions?

joshua 1 9 · Aug 8, 2019

timewerx said:
I have this condition and barely feel emotion

You can research this on google. The neurosurgeons know quite a bit about the brain now from operating on people that have brain cancer tumors. Emotions, like fear and love, are carried out by the limbic system, which is located in the temporal lobe. While the limbic system is made up of multiple parts of the brain, the center of emotional processing is the amygdala, which receives input from other brain functions, like memory and attention.

What Parts of the Human Brain Correspond to Emotion or Love? | Livestrong.com

Messerve · Aug 13, 2019

timewerx said:
I'm sorry to hear. Fortunately, I didn't have much traumatic experience during childhood. I had on one occassion but didnt cause me to lose emotions. I'm well into my 30's when I started losing them.

Do you still feel them a lot more whenever you dream?

Stop acting. You're not sorry, or you'd be feeling an emotion.

Sorry, I just had to point that out. :sorry:

Messerve · Aug 13, 2019

I met with a therapist for a short time once and what we couldn't figure out was my lack of anger and just deadened emotions in general.

I think it was my highly emotional and roller-coaster family life that more or less drained all the emotion out of me. I remember carefully building a town out of blocks for hours one day when two of my siblings (younger and older) just walked by, kicked it over and walked away laughing. I just silently starting rebuilding from the very beginning and my mom, who had seen the whole thing, asked me why I didn't even react emotionally. I jut shrugged my shoulders and had no answer for her.

But I'm pretty sure it was the constant emotions, drama and hurt surrounding me that left me unable to feel as much as others.

I have "recovered" a bit in that I actually have gotten angry lately. But it's still sort of a new experience.

timewerx · Aug 13, 2019

Messerve said:
Stop acting. You're not sorry, or you'd be feeling an emotion.

Sorry, I just had to point that out.

If I only act based on feelings (which I don't have anymore), then I'd be doing nothing all the time.

The Bible tells us to do things regardless of how we feel.

Justasking123 · Dec 12, 2019

timewerx said:
The Bible tells us to do things regardless of how we feel.

Where does the Bible say this?

Hopeful37 · Apr 6, 2020

Justasking123 said:
Where does the Bible say this?

I would say Esther is a good example of that. She didn't really want to approach the King on behalf of the Jews

I only experience emotions in dreams

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