What is it that you're looking for in a man, other than being Christian?
My first concern is compatibility in purpose. I won’t choose a companion who will compromise my mission. I require a gentleman. I won’t grace a coarse man’s arm. Good communication (pleasant and appropriate), poise and etiquette are non negotiable. Our dispositions need to complement the other.
I’m attracted to men with vision who know how to lead. They bear the results in their person and lifestyle. I like doers not dreamers and I’m best suited for over achievers. I like confidence and assertiveness. The person who plays it safe and follows the crowd isn’t for me. He must be his own man and secure in his manhood. I can’t give him that.
He needs to understand his mission and be walking it out. The person who is yielded to God and pursuing his calling is my ideal. I need someone in the trenches who’s all-in. Not talking about it. But living it everyday.
He has to grasp the nature of my work and its demands. If he’s incapable of operating outside of a Christian environment it won’t work. I can’t give him that utopia.
There are deeper things related to sin because of the industry. I don’t want to cause anyone to stumble. If sexual sin, drugs, or the occult are weaknesses. I would have reservations.
My willingness to share my life and marriage openly has its drawbacks if you’re not comfortable doing the same. I consider a suitor’s reputation and its impact.
Fit is a big thing for me. I’m not the right fit for everyone. Especially someone lacking self-control. Or the person desiring a traditional Christian wife. If he needs a white picket fence I’m the wrong choice.
I require a partner who needs a looking-glass and knows what that means. My gifts and talents must be utilized. I’d wither with the guy next door and be deeply unfulfilled.
The men I date are executives or business owners. I was fashioned for that man. He’ll understand my nature when others don’t. He’ll appreciate the propriety others mock. He wants a woman set apart. Not a carbon copy of the rest.
That wasn't even a strawman schtick. I'm just trying to figure how the abuse and attending small group at a home tie together, that's all. I as concurring with the other poster on how extreme that decision is.
The initial topic was about background checks. I shared my experience as a parent and an adult. Church attendance doesn’t lessen the reality that I’m seated amongst strangers. I don’t know their character. It isn’t something I’d set aside.
I think among Christian, male lawyers you'll find men who fit your description - leadership, poise and etiquette, confidence and assertiveness, not following the crowd, and always working outside a Christian environment. Good fashion sense, too, lots of times.
