Getting healthy together

After vegetables, it's lean meats and then fruits? I would have thought the other way around, but you could be right.

My philosophy is, "Anything God made is probably better than anything put together in a laboratory." However, "all natural" doesn't always mean "healthy." Cobra venom is "all natural" too.

Now, as for calories, I'm told not to go below 1200 calories. That's what the dietician said, and it's backed up in several sources. Some days I have trouble making 1000. Today might be one of those days. One person in a support group told me not to be afraid to eat. I'm not afraid.... I'm just full! Honestly, I don't even feel all that hungry anymore.

That goal weight they gave me to meet prior to the surgery, that I didn't think I could... I'm under it by 2 1/2 pounds. But I'm not having the surgery now anyway.

Checking in.

Well, several things are happening. As of this morning, I have lost 56 pounds, and hubby has lost 65. That weight I haven't been able to get below in nearly 35 years, I'm 10 pounds under.

Hubby has hit a plateau. Even though he is making healthy choices and exercising a lot, his weight loss has slowed down to little or nothing. When we started this back in January, I outweighed him by around 10 to 12 pounds. It stayed that way for a while because every time I lost weight, so did he. As of this morning, I outweigh him by only 3 pounds. I don't gloat. I just smile and say, "I'm closing in on you," and he smiles back. He's not worried. He knows he'll start going down again. I still look fatter than he does, and I will for a while even after I pass him up and weigh less, because he's taller and has more muscle.

I've got a saggy "apron" and bat wings for days, but I'm almost proud of them. Hey, that loose, saggy skin used to be all filled out with fat.

As I've been warned would happen, some people are food pushing. That same lady from church who suggested we celebrate my weight loss by going out for a banana split.... well, she called me one evening and asked if she could drop by with a surprise for me. Since she and I are both taking a quilting class, I guessed it might have something to do with that. My daughter, however, predicted it was probably some kind of food. And she was right. The lady arrived and immediately began, "Now, I know you're on a diet and I shouldn't tempt you, but...."

Notice how she says "on a diet," suggesting that it's something I can just stop and start at will. She doesn't grasp that this is a permanent lifestyle change. By comparison, the pastor of our church is a recovering alcoholic. I'm sure she wouldn't dream of coming to his house with a bottle of brandy, saying "I shouldn't tempt you, but...."

It was a container of deep fried okra. Her reasoning was that back last November, when hubby and I renewed our wedding vows for our tenth anniversary, Southern cooking had been the theme for our reception, so she figured I'd probably enjoy it. Well, I couldn't eat it anyway, because it's breaded, and I can't have wheat. But daughter enjoyed it.

Since this *is* the same lady who suggested the banana split, I can't help but wonder if something less than innocent is going on.

Oh, and my blood glucose reading this morning was a little lower than the doctor wants it... on 24 units of insulin. Yes, I've reduced it again.

Hubby and I got our A1C results back. We both knew they'd be lower, but we didn't realize HOW MUCH lower.

Mine was 6.7 which is still in the diabetic range, but it's drastically down from the 8.6 it was before. It's been as high as at least 11, maybe 12. And my insulin dose is now 22.

His was an even 6.0, which is in the prediabetic range. We both have follow-up doctor appointments. We'll see what, if any, med changes are to be made.

He gave me hiking gear as an early birthday present. (It's actually three weeks from now.) Trekking poles, a waist pack with a water bottle holder, and very nice shoes. Snapped this picture when we went to test it out. The hat was a free bonus the store threw in. The trail was listed as "easy," but not for me. I could not have done this by myself. Even with the poles, I had to have his help walking down steep grades.

It happened this morning.

Hubby now outweighs me by one pound. I have passed him up. This isn't because I've been losing weight quickly, but because I have continued to lose while he's had a small regain. He's not real happy with himself about it, but he acknowledged it's because he's been eating carelessly, and pep-talked himself about getting back into the program.

I still look fatter than he does, because I'm shorter and have less muscle compared to fat.

Over the weekend, we took a 50-piece bucket of fried chicken to our (small) church for a picnic. Turns out hubby had overestimated the turnout. There were 15 people present, most of whom are watching their weight. We offered leftovers to my sister and brother-in-law, but they declined, so we ended up taking quite a bit of chicken home with us. Fortunately, there are five people in this house, not just the two of us.

Anyway, after we had homemade chicken and vegetable soup for lunch today, hubby noted that soup is mostly liquid, and it probably wouldn't hurt him to have a couple of pieces of that leftover fried chicken. We've already been educated that fat is 9 calories a gram, while carbs and proteins are 4 calories a gram. I told him I'm going to turn it down because fried chicken is high fat, and if it's high fat, then it's high calorie. He reconsidered and decided to go for deli-sliced turkey instead.

Now, if I had been trying to sabotage him (as has been done to me in the past, in a different life I no longer lead) I would have said, "Sure, honey. That's a good idea. Chicken is protein, and that's healthy. Have all you want." If I were nagging him, I would have said, "Now, honey, you know you've regained some weight. Don't you think you should lay off the fried food for a while?" Instead I simply made my own choice, told him the what and why of it, and he followed my lead. Sort of. Because I stopped at the soup, and didn't have any of the turkey either.

I know he's going to get back on track because he's just as determined as I am. He was pleased as punch with his latest A1C test, and he doesn't really want to backslide. He may even get back to where he's losing weight faster than I am. I'm only lighter by one pound at this point, and as he says, it's a seesaw.

I hate to double post, but I think I need help with this one. We just came back from a walk together. I don’t want to stop those because they are quality time, and as far as saying anything to him, I want to tread lightly. He’s under stress. That new job he started, well, he lost it, and it was even more unfair than the last job loss was.

I’m starting to notice some things. It happened yesterday too. I’m operating with a strong cardio system but a weak muscular system. That means it’s harder for me to move my body enough to get my heart rate up and burn calories. Although I’ll probably always need a cane and be slightly slower than average, I’m improving. I’m using a tracker to record my pace. Hubby knows all of this. He sees me using the tracker and he hears me announce my pace. Yet lately, it seems *just* as I’m getting my heart rate up, he’ll notice something interesting that he wants me to stop and take a look at. Which, of course, slows my heart rate right back down. And today as we were on the way home, when the sidewalk got narrow, he stepped in front of me rather than behind me, causing me to slow down, and again dropping my heart rate. Granted he has always walked faster than me before. Maybe he wasn’t aware that he caused me to have to slow down, even though he did know I was tracking my pace. But past experience causes me to wonder if he is maybe on some level doing this on purpose.

We went out for another walk after evening services tonight. Turns out there is an athletic complex right near us with all kinds of sports fields, and an excellent walking trail circling around them all. Park closes at dusk, but we were able to squeeze in another 1.8 miles. Hubby was eating an apple right before we first started. He told me to go on ahead while he threw away the core, and he'd catch up. So I started walking, picking up my pace, and said hello to the rabbit I noticed as I passed by. A few minutes later, I heard his voice behind me, also saying hello to the rabbit. But he spotted something I hadn't seen. Sure enough, just as I was hitting my stride and my heart rate was beginning to increase, he stopped and called out to me. "Hey, did you notice these baby rabbits back here?"

Well, I'm not going to put that on him, because I was the one who chose to stop and circle back and look at the baby rabbits with him. But I think he realized the problem, because a short time later he apologized to me for breaking my stride, without me even saying anything about it. Then we figured out what the (slight) conflict of interest is about.

When we're walking as opposed to hiking, I go for speed while he goes for distance. He has 5 miles a day as his goal, while I'm working on walking faster. I started out barely able to do 2 miles an hour, which is a mile in 30 minutes. But I completed that course this evening at a pace of 23:32. Not my best. My best is 22:53. The average person walks at a speed of 3 miles an hour, which would complete a mile in 20 minutes. I don't know if I'll ever catch up to that, but I don't have to.

When we're hiking, I don't even worry about speed. Navigating up and down hills is strenuous enough. Especially down, for me, because of my balance issues. The difference between walking and hiking, by the way, is that hiking moves across rough terrain, from a lower elevation to a higher one. Walking is done on a level terrain, usually on a smooth surface like asphalt. We do both.

Sweet hubby had a terrible fall.

He was unloading building supplies from the back of his pickup truck, walking backwards, when he tripped over one landscaping boulder and landed directly on top of another one. Two or three sheets of outdoor siding landed on top of him. We thank God he didn't crack his tailbone or something. He's "only" scraped up really bad, and a little sore. Also fortunately, he wasn't alone. Our handyman was with him when it happened.

So naturally, we haven't done much walking together in the last couple of days. I think we'll resume tomorrow, but he'll probably need to take it slow. He's been advised to walk *some,* and not spend too much time resting, or he'll stiffen up and not be able to move.

Our latest weigh-in was dead even.

I gave myself a wonderful birthday present today.

First, when hubby and I went for our afternoon walk, I set a new personal best pace of 22:48 to the mile. I am not able to run, and may never, but I'm getting closer and closer to the rate at which an average adult walks. (Last week I tried holding my cane up off the ground and took a few steps without it, while walking at a fast clip. But I had trouble holding a straight line, and started staggering a little, so I put the cane back on the ground. Until and unless I can easily step down off a curb without it, I'm still going to need it.)

Second, that waist pack hubby bought me, with the water bottle holders? I had to tighten it by at least an inch. Maybe more.

Hubby is recovering nicely from his fall.

Hubby's backsliding juuuuuust a little. As a recap, when we started this, I outweighed him by ten pounds. It stayed that way for a while because every time I lost weight, so did he. He now outweighs me by three pounds, and I'm not losing all that fast. Maybe a pound a week at this point. But I have confidence he'll get back on track. He's motivated.

Know what I can do?

I can run, if you want to call it that, down the hallway at home. Now, the hallway is nice and safe because it's a soft, level surface, and there are walls close by on either side of me. I don't want to try it yet outdoors, especially on uneven ground. Back and forth a few times, the length of the hallway (maybe 20 feet), is about the best I can do. Not fast. But that's better than I've done in years. I never really could run well, not even as a child.

You should have seen my cat looking at me like I have three heads. "What ARE you doing, Mommy?"

Hubby's back on track now, losing weight again. Please pray for him. He has four job interviews coming up in the next week, two of them today.

I hit a small plateau for a while, but I'm going back down now too. I still look "fat" to myself in the mirror, but I know I'm improving my health. Which is the goal. I can walk at *almost* an average pace now. Average is 20 minutes to the mile. On a good day, I can do just under 22. Physical therapist told me I can lose my cane when I get to where I can stand on one foot, without wobbling, for 15 seconds. I'm nowhere near that. I *can* step down off a not-too-steep curb without using my cane. Not easily. Not without breaking my stride. But I can do it. And I can walk without it, but not at my fastest pace. I have to slow down considerably.

I've been hired for a temporary job, which will start sometime late this month or early next month. I haven't been notified exactly the start date yet. As part of the interview, I was asked if I can lift up to 50 pounds. I said I can, and I didn't lie or stretch the truth in any way. I've tested myself, and I really *can.* Since it's an office clerk job, I don't think I'll be doing a lot of that, but it's good to know I can if I need to.

I have a friend from church who is a runner, and she's been giving me a lot of positive helpful tips. She doesn't look like she needs to lose weight, but she has shown me where her ribs and hip bones reach. She's very small boned and is built to be a tiny person, which means that the weight she is carrying actually is *just* a little extra. She feels better when she's not carrying it, so her goal is health too. I on the other hand (now that I can feel my ribs and hip bones and know where they are) can plainly see that I am NOT meant to be a tiny person. Even at my ideal weight, my BMI is probably going to be in the "overweight" category. But I'm fine with that. The goal is health. My friend and I both use an app to track running in her case, walking in mine, and sometimes we post our results on Facebook. We encourage each other a lot.

So, on sabotage and people having a problem with success: Remember the lady from church who suggested we celebrate my weight loss with banana splits, and brought me a dish of deep-fried okra saying, "I know I shouldn't tempt you, but...."? Yesterday, this lady tagged both my runner friend and me in a Facebook post. "(Friend's name) and (my name), take heed!" It turned out to be a joke comic strip, warning that jogging is dangerous because "my thighs kept rubbing together and setting my rear end on fire." Then this morning, I found she had sent me a private message with a written essay from 2015 that I'd read before. In fact, I think it came up on that Facebook group my brother took over and turned into fat-positive where I had meant it to be health-promoting. The essay is on how it's better to be a whale than a mermaid because mermaids aren't real and whales are, and people who don't worry about it and eat ice cream with their children are happier than people who go to the gym and exercise. Basically, it's denigrating thin women in order to affirm plus-sized women, which shouldn't need to be done. I am now convinced of two things: 1.) She is so ditzy she doesn't even realize she just called me a whale, and 2.) She is actively trying to discourage me. Hubby and I decided the best course of action is to just flat-out ignore anything she posts. It would be too awkward to block her or unfriend her, since we go to the same church.

It appears I may have graduated from water jogging. It may not be physically challenging enough for me anymore. I no longer need to use pool weights, since I can get a much more effective workout from plain old hand weights on dry land. I'm up to 10 pounds now. Depending on brand, the heavy-resistance pool weights only give about 6 to 8 pounds of resistance. Not ready for free-weight lifting yet, if ever.

I can't water jog right now anyway, since I reinjured my previously broken toe, and it's still healing. Today I did those hand weights, followed by weight machines, and 22 minutes on the bicycle.

From the beginning of this journey, I have always used the hot tub and sauna as a method of pain control. When I was shopping around for a gym to join, I encountered an online review that said, "These complaints that we don't have a hot tub or a sauna.... you're just looking for excuses. What do hot tubs and saunas have to do with just getting up off your butt and doing it???" Well, I'll tell you. If I couldn't do a hot tub and/or sauna (preferably both) after working out, especially 65 pounds ago, then I would end up in severe pain, and I wouldn't be able to *continue* to just get up off my butt and do it. People who ask about those things at a gym, or refuse to join one that doesn't have them available, aren't just looking for some place to kick back and be comfortable. To me, they have been a vital part of getting healthy.

Still have some pounds to go. Hubby, now outweighing me by a good five to ten pounds, seems to be in a stall, but I'm not going to hold it against him. I hope he doesn't hold it against himself. He's had some back pain ever since that fall he took, and he's finally agreed to go to the doctor with it. I stopped mentioning it, but then he made the appointment on his own terms of his own volition. I'm glad. So anyway, he's finding it difficult to exercise. Even going for a walk can trigger back pain for him. His appointment is the day after tomorrow, because tomorrow he has a job interview. I'll keep you posted on both developments, health and job.

That lady from church approached me last Sunday, patted her own behind, and grumbled, "I think I'm finding the weight you're losing." Yeah.... she doesn't like it that I'm doing this. It's triggering something in her. She's not that big to begin with, but I think a lot of us see ourselves as bigger than we really are. I still can't see any difference in the mirror.