My wife has gone to the pastors at my church and told them I do not work. I do work and have a job, however I just do not make as much money as my wife, actually I work constantly around the house etc. My family has plenty money to make payments house, food, everything. The church deems that I am in violation of first Timothy 5:8 and is in the process of treating me as a nonbeliever. I have attached a letter below from the church would you please read and give me advice. It seems to me they are mis using scriptures. Your careful consideration would be appreciated. See letter from church below.
View attachment 259490 Thank you
It's hard to judge such a situation without knowing all the facts involved. If you were disabled that would be a different situation. The church states in the beginning of the letter that they know about your financial situation for some time (and imply that it is not good). Either your wife exaggerated and lied about your financial status to the church, or she is telling the truth and there are legit concerns like trying to save for retirement (to work for the Lord full time), and or not live paycheck to paycheck (and just getting by with no means to start a family or go on vacation together and love one another).
A full time job or a part time job that makes more money would show that you love your wife. Even if you were financially okay in your opinion, she is unhappy, and your goal should be to please the Lord and your wife in this life. This life is not about ourselves but it is about loving God and loving others.
Yes, maybe the church went overboard and they are believing lies or something by your wife, and they are overstepping their boundaries into your life (of which you did not ask for them to do). Maybe they seem controlling and they are not being totally fair here. I know, if I received such a letter, I would feel betrayed by my wife in her doing this. But we have to be better than others. Maybe she did not handle things right. Maybe the church did not handle things right. But a believer in Jesus Christ (who is faithful to the Lord) can break any cycle of sin within their family by the power and help of the Lord.
We have to love God and love others (even if they are not perfect). My first reaction is that I would not seek to fellowship with them if they are so easily deceived into making quick judgments without any real proof (unless your financial status was assessed officially by a private loan lender, mortgage lender, etc.). Did she show them unpaid bills? Did she show the church that you cannot pay off the full amount on the credit cards each month and you can only pay the minimum or a lesser amount (Which eats you up alive with interest)? For how can they truly know your finances? If you were to try and get an approval letter on a house, would you think you would get approved? Is your credit score good? (Note: You can check it for free with Bankrate.com).
Now, I am not saying that you are doing so, but if you are sitting around all day and just watching secular movies (and not Christian ones to inspire you to follow the Lord) instead of working or you are just on the computer all day (for non-biblical reasons), and you are not working for the Lord and not seeking to help others, this of course is wrong, my dear friend. We have to live to love God and others. If your wife is worried about the finances, but God is first in your life, she would want to help you to work hard at trying to reach others for the Lord (via by the internet, or by bible studies, street preaching, or handing out tracts, helping the poor, training other brothers in righteous living, etc.). If not, then she needs to know that you can provide for her as you follow God.
But if you are idle and doing nothing outside of your part time job, then my dear friend, you need to seek more the Lord and read His Word and put it on the inside of you. God's Word can change our hearts and lives. Jesus can change our heart and His love can over spill into your family (Both upon your wife and your church). Love them with the love of the Lord. Forgive them with God's power. Show them the true love of God. Prove that you are better than what they say about you. Let their false accusations (if they are not true) roll off you like water. So get a full time job or a better paying part time job or take up another part time job, and find ways to love them. But make following the Lord Jesus Christ the #1 thing in your life and get in the Word of God even more every day. Pray to the Lord for help; And He will help you.
It is possible that there could be blame to go around on both sides. I do not know. I am not God to know everyone's heart, thoughts, actions in this situation. I can only go off the information you provided. Based on the information you provided, I would love. Love God and love others more than you ever have before. Maybe hand out tracts, Christian DVD's, help the poor more and let your church know about your activities. Love your wife more than you have. Go above and beyond to love her. Open the car door, get her flowers. Tell her you are sorry for not being as sensible to her needs. Tell her you love her in a love letter. Make her breakfast in bed. Tell her that you would like to go on a romantic vacation get away and that you will work hard to change things. Do more than what they are willing to do. Work 40 hours and then also help others more than they are so they will feel embarrassed. By doing so, this problem will disappear or you will learn in time to be at peace about it (even if others may be unfair to your unique situation).
I hope that what I said here helps;
And may God's goodness be upon you and your family.
Sincerely,
~ J.