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what are you feeling right now? (24)

Jeshu

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Feeling nervous about our upcoming trip. we'll be on our way to the airport in 4 hours. i can hardly believe how quick these three weeks have gone. i feel sad leaving our loved ones behind, but there is not much we can do about that.

i developed a chest cold just before leaving. i hope that i will be okay soon for otherwise i can't visit my dad who is still recuperating from his latest brush with death.

Looking forward to seeing my family again. Apart of my sister and her husband we haven't seen them for 5 years.

Anyway we best clean up the motor home and pack all our suitcases again.

i hate travelling but at least my mood is better than three weeks ago and i'm not near as often nauseous as before. So travelling ought to be more pleasant this time.

Blessings to all
 
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Jeshu

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Feeling tired. After a tiring trip we have arrived in Holland. It was good to see my mum and two sisters again. Today i will visit dad so glad he survived so that we can still see him one more time. He has been told many times that we are coming but he forgets within a half hour. It will be good to meet him again.

i slept only 3 hours and then i was awake again. i hope that the jet lag will not be as bad as last time.

Blessings to all
 
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chaoticfirefly

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Angry.

Three/four weeks in, and I'm already considering the pros and cons of arson. I had a breakdown in my car tonight. Did not get a break (not that it would matter on a federal level, its a corporation, laws are just pretty words rich people can ignore), was starving, was hot and dehydrated, we have no air conditioning, was upset and angry because people like to stare you down if something is wrong or give you the cold shoulder like you don't exist because they have to wait (and I always feel angry and petty enough to throw their food on the ground and tell them that they're children, belittle and hurt them and destroy them and make them feel as suicidal as I do), and was kept three hours past my time off to do dishes.

My manager was like, "Finish all these dishes and you can go" while they kept bringing more back.

And they wondered why I was so cranky and barely even answered them on my way out.

There should be a law that says treat people in working service kindly. And we should get rid of the customer is always right crap--99% of the time, they're lying--and the whole facade of constant smiling and being polite no matter what people say or do to you.

Or a sign that says, "Remember the worker are humans, not robots. They also feel emotions, make mistakes, and have lives outside of here".

The world would be a better place if we were all kind to each other. But we aren't.
 
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Press On

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Paulus59

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Playing badminton practice is good, though light sprain caught me.

blessings to all. :wave:
The practice is good Yusuphhai and it will keep your mind sharp. Hope you enjoy it! Blessings to you. :oldthumbsup:
 
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Paulus59

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The world would be a better place if we were all kind to each other. But we aren't.

I hear your struggles chaoticfirefly and it would be a better place if we were all kind to each other, but unfortunately we live in a fallen world where man doesn't have the spirit or love of God. If everyone was a true Christian believe me chaoticfirefly this world would be a wonderful place. I hope you are somehow blessed by your circumstances and come out on top!
 
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Jeshu

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Its 3.45am. i have been awake for ages already but still little sign of more sleep. i' chronically short of sleep. Seeing all my siblings and mum and dad again has me completely out of routine.

Lets hope i still catch a few hours.
 
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Jeshu

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I am fat,many Bipolar will be like that. need get up earlier and practice more exercise.

Blessings to all. :wave:

Brother i lost 35 kilos because i stopped using sugar. i found that going of the sugar made me feel better in my body and mind, stopped my craving after food, and reduced my overall food intake enormously. It is not easy to stop sugar because it is addictive and takes up to six weeks before you get used to it.

i hate exercising so going of the sugar worked much better for me.

Peace
 
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Tempura

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I’m feeling awful. Despite being on the max dose of vraylar everyday over a week ago I got debilitating hallucinations anyways. I was really hoping that even though I am disabled with schizoaffective disorder that if I took the meds everyday that I could still live a normal life. But the past week or so I was too sick to concentrate. I’ve barely studied at all. It hasn’t set me back because I’m just taking one last class over the summer right now. But I’m so disappointed. I’m trying to become a tax accountant and already have a job lined up for it contingent upon graduating on time. But now that I know i can randomly at any time be knocked out with hallucinations I feel so defeated and broken. What if this happens during busy season when I’m working 65 hours a week? I’ve lost all confidence in myself. I’m thinking I should just go work in industry instead with low stress and forty hours a week so that it’s not a problem if I get sick for a week. But my dad is telling me to try to become partner at the tax firm anyways. I don’t know what to do and feel so defeated

I think the best thing to do is to just keep on doing what you've been doing. If some meds needs re-evaluation, then so be it, talk about it with your doctor. But don't panic and don't start to make 30 other plans right away. It's okay. Don't think that everything is now lost, think more like this: "I've done so well, and even if I'm not so well know, at least I have concrete proof that I can do well and I can be healthier". Do not think your fate is sealed. You know you have the tendency to worry so much, and Illnesses like these can be fickle. If it turns out at some point that you'd better think of doing something else, then worry about it then. Meanwhile, do what you can, get the rest and professional help you need. You're not a stranger to this, and I'm very proud of you. If I was in your shoes, I wouldn't have managed to do half the things you have done. God bless you!
 
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Tempura

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I am fat,many Bipolar will be like that. need get up earlier and practice more exercise.

Blessings to all. :wave:

I need to exercise today as well. You should hear what my knees sound like when I straighten my legs. Getting old, need to move a bit more!

Also what Jeshu said. If you happen to get a lot of sugar, take less of it. When I stopped buying sodas and energy drinks, my weight dropped significantly. But of course sugar isn't the only reason, sometimes it's meds, sometimes other habits. All the best to you brother. Good exercising!
 
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