I am going through a lot of problems now, and to be honest, my faith is failing. One common thing I hear often in replies is how God planned this so I can reach others . If that is so, why does he love them enough to make ME suffer, and hate me enough to keep it in the plan?
Well, a lot of people say stuff like that because it sounds altruistic and frankly they don't know what else to say.
It's like when your kid dies and you hear: "Oh, God wanted another little angel in heaven."
Oh really? Well then, take someone else's "little angel".
Or this one: "All these bad things have happened to you because.... there must be sin in your life." (Well yeah honey; there's sin in yours too!)
Or: "If you just had more faith, you (or your kid) would be healed." (Honey, you got no idea. Ya actually looking at a modern day Job - so - shut up!)
And my favorite pet peeve: "Have you prayed about this?" (No.... ya mean I should? That never occurred to me! You're such a sage overflowing with wisdom. Gee, thanks!)
At the end of the day though; we all want to find some purpose for our pain, because the thought of pointless suffering just doesn't make us feel better. And though sometimes we suffer from our own sin, short sightedness, ignorance, or immaturity; other times, there's no real "logical" reason for what's happened. We live in a fallen world, affected by a lot of factors we are not privy to; and yes there are times that we can't see in the here and now why "event X" happened. Sometimes that answer comes years (or even decades) later. Sometimes it doesn't come in this life.
So when you say your faith is failing; faith in what? God or the stupid things other people say?
I've had a very difficult life and often times at the worst times; people who understood and could actually help me were far and few between. I've more often than not found myself pleading to God for help because there wasn't any other place to go. Enough times though, through people who could and would help me; I realized God did actually care.
Other times, it became very clear to me that I was the subject of direct Divine intervention; even when I was too blind to see it. And the end result of those have always been a "I place my hand over my mouth" Job moment.
30 For we know him that hath said, Vengeance belongeth unto me, I will recompense, saith the Lord. And again, The Lord shall judge his people.
31 It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.
32 But call to remembrance the former days, in which, after ye were illuminated, ye endured a great fight of afflictions;
Hebrews 10