I will start from beginning. I remember couple of times when I though I have fallen away it felt it even hurt in my heart and if God was very far away,but then I said to my self I believe that He haven't left me and He is forgiving and I choose to believe that He is near and I have faith.
Okay. Well, God is forgiving and He is present everywhere in His Creation. How do I know this? Because I feel He is? No. I believe these things because it is what the Bible, God's word, says. What it says is true no matter what I may feel. God's truth does not rest upon my feeling about it to be true. So, what you feel isn't the important thing; nor is what you believe. What is REALLY important is what
God has said.
And I started to feel as If He is truly close to me. Where is this boundary my imagination and reality or I don't understand how it is.
This is the problem with letting what you feel dictate what is real and true. What happens when your feelings change - as they will, sooner or later? Is God just what you can make yourself feel? No. He is near you whether you feel He is or not. This is what the Bible says and you need to walk with God by faith in its declarations, and promises, and wisdom, not by what you may or may not feel.
Can someone explain me. Then how do I know He is with me ?
You know He is with you because this is what the Bible says. There are some other ways God says in His word that you can know He is within you:
His Spirit will convict you of sin. (
John 16:8)
His Spirit will illuminate your understanding. (
John 16:13)
His Spirit will enable you to put to death the desires of the flesh. (
Romans 8:13)
His Spirit will produce in you spiritual fruit. (
Galatians 5:22-23)
His Spirit will bear witness with your spirit that you are His child. (
Romans 8:16)
God will change your desires and will enable you to do His will (
Philippians 2:13)
God will discipline you when you stray from Him. (
Hebrews 12:5-11)
All of these things (and others besides) reveal to us that we are truly born-again children of God. Are these things I've listed evident in your life?