Should I Confront My Friend?

nb408 said:

Long story short, he planned to break me and my girlfriend up. We did break up and 5 months later we talk about it and realize he's 80 percent of the reason why we ended things. I'm going to the movies with him tonight, should I ask him why he did that?

He confessed that he had feelings for her and tried to get with her as well.. One of my best friends basically blind sided me.

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Personally for me all friend’s ex girlfriends should be off limits. It’s just not a cool thing to do and can cause awkwardness and problems. I don’t know enough details to determine if he’s a good friend or not or how much involvement he had in your breakup.

If he already confessed then you know why. Confrontation doesn't seem necessary except if you need to talk it through with him and get him to understand that's not how friends are to each other. Also an understanding he won't act that way again, if he doesn't understand and probably would do it again then that's a chance you're taking with him as your friend. The question is if he does it again is that the last straw of the friendship, if not then what? After five months and his confession, is he a new man who wouldn't do it again (has the friendship healed and improved?)

nb408 said:

Long story short, he planned to break me and my girlfriend up. We did break up and 5 months later we talk about it and realize he's 80 percent of the reason why we ended things. I'm going to the movies with him tonight, should I ask him why he did that?

He confessed that he had feelings for her and tried to get with her as well.. One of my best friends basically blind sided me.

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I've never figured out how a third party can break two people up.

He doesn't sound like a very good friend, though at least he confessed... If he was the main reason for your break up, perhaps you should mend things with your girlfriend?

What exactly did he do to break you up, anyway?

nb408 said:

Long story short, he planned to break me and my girlfriend up. We did break up and 5 months later we talk about it and realize he's 80 percent of the reason why we ended things. I'm going to the movies with him tonight, should I ask him why he did that?

He confessed that he had feelings for her and tried to get with her as well.. One of my best friends basically blind sided me.

Click to expand...

Is this some kind of childhood friend? Because I'm having trouble figuring out how you could have not done this already.


Your relationship does fit the saying "with friend's like these who needs enemies!"

nb408 said:

we talk about it and realize he's 80 percent of the reason why we ended things.

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But there was at least the other 20%. And what you really mean, of course, can be what can't be measured by numbers.

If someone else can break me up from someone, this means we are somehow under the power of that person. So, in case the person has done what is wrong to us, this means we have given in to the influence of a wrong person; therefore, most of all, we need to pray and get corrected by God, so wrong people can not have power over us to decide what we do.

But in case we could get broken up, it could be our relationship was not God's will. Because God will keep what He is committed to.

So, you can pray and get more with God, and discover if then He really is committed to you two being together. If you have talked about this, this could mean you belong with one another. But pray and trust God.

nb408 said:

Long story short, he planned to break me and my girlfriend up. We did break up and 5 months later we talk about it and realize he's 80 percent of the reason why we ended things. I'm going to the movies with him tonight, should I ask him why he did that?

He confessed that he had feelings for her and tried to get with her as well.. One of my best friends basically blind sided me.

Click to expand...

For what purpose? He wanted her. You had her. He worked to break you two up. Pretty clear.

I think I'd find a new friend.

If you can avoid him, I'll advice you to. He might be jealous of you, it's dangerous because he feels you don't deserve certain things he can't get, you don't need to confront him rather be wary of him

I would try to get to the bottom of it, what he did, why he did it, and make sure he knows that you know this. I would also let him know what the consequences are for this. For me, I wouldn't be able to trust him again, and I would detach myself from the friendship, even if it's just partway. I also wouldn't completely blame him for the breakup. Sounds like your relationship with your ex wasn't on strong enough footing to withstand the interference - that's not on him, that's on you two. Maybe God is using this guy's interference as a way to remove you from a relationship that wasn't in his will, or maybe he used it as a way to teach you and her how to communicate better with your significant other, or something.

I'd say you deserve the truth from him. Get it.