Confronting a Christian

ChicanaRose said:

Do you think that there are cases in which we need to bring someone along (Matt. 18:16) and skip the one-on-one to confrontation (v.15) with a Christian brother or sister?

Here are some cases I could think of:

1. The person has a history of being physically and/or verbally abusive (i.e. it is not safe)

2. The person refuses to take anything you say seriously, and will not get that you mean business unless there is a stronger person acting as a reinforcement.

3. The person has a habit of lying and twisting your words. I've read in a Christian counseling site that in such cases, you need to bring a witness along to protect yourself from her lying about the conversation.

Are there other cases you could think of? I want to advise people more carefully from now on, on a case-by-case basis, as well as being more careful for myself.

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Endeavourer said:

Titus 3:10 is Scripture: Titus 3:10 Reject a divisive man after a first and second admonition,

It is not appropriate to take everything through a Matt 18 approach. It has sadly been my experience that you are highly dependent upon very poorly prepared/trained church leaders who would rather endlessly try ministering to a psychopath than protecting his/her victim. Generally the victim has examined him/her self countless times, is very tenderhearted and almost beat down emotionally to a pulp. The psychopath has no care for anyone but him/herself.

Therefore, the church sees that the victim will try to follow everything they say (unto the victim's own destruction even) so they sin-level and throw the victim under the bus in their fruitless attempts to win the psychopath to Christ.

Quite often a victim is not safe to use the Matt 18 process. Titus 3:10 is the best alternative in many cases.

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ChicanaRose said:

Do you think that there are cases in which we need to bring someone along (Matt. 18:16) and skip the one-on-one to confrontation (v.15) with a Christian brother or sister?

Here are some cases I could think of:

1. The person has a history of being physically and/or verbally abusive (i.e. it is not safe)

2. The person refuses to take anything you say seriously, and will not get that you mean business unless there is a stronger person acting as a reinforcement.

3. The person has a habit of lying and twisting your words. I've read in a Christian counseling site that in such cases, you need to bring a witness along to protect yourself from her lying about the conversation.

Are there other cases you could think of? I want to advise people more carefully from now on, on a case-by-case basis, as well as being more careful for myself.

Click to expand...

timewerx said:

It is indeed a valid thing to avoid certain people, after all, the Bible teaches it.

2 John 1:10
If anyone comes to you and does not bring this teaching, do not take them into your house or welcome them.

Matthew 10:14
If anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words, leave that home or town and shake the dust off your feet.

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ChicanaRose said:

Do you think that there are cases in which we need to bring someone along (Matt. 18:16) and skip the one-on-one to confrontation (v.15) with a Christian brother or sister?

Here are some cases I could think of:

1. The person has a history of being physically and/or verbally abusive (i.e. it is not safe)

2. The person refuses to take anything you say seriously, and will not get that you mean business unless there is a stronger person acting as a reinforcement.

3. The person has a habit of lying and twisting your words. I've read in a Christian counseling site that in such cases, you need to bring a witness along to protect yourself from her lying about the conversation.

Are there other cases you could think of? I want to advise people more carefully from now on, on a case-by-case basis, as well as being more careful for myself.

Click to expand...

ChicanaRose said:

Do you think that there are cases in which we need to bring someone along (Matt. 18:16) and skip the one-on-one to confrontation (v.15) with a Christian brother or sister?

Here are some cases I could think of:

1. The person has a history of being physically and/or verbally abusive (i.e. it is not safe)

2. The person refuses to take anything you say seriously, and will not get that you mean business unless there is a stronger person acting as a reinforcement.

3. The person has a habit of lying and twisting your words. I've read in a Christian counseling site that in such cases, you need to bring a witness along to protect yourself from her lying about the conversation.

Are there other cases you could think of? I want to advise people more carefully from now on, on a case-by-case basis, as well as being more careful for myself.

Click to expand...

ChicanaRose said:

Do you think that there are cases in which we need to bring someone along (Matt. 18:16) and skip the one-on-one to confrontation (v.15) with a Christian brother or sister?

Here are some cases I could think of:

1. The person has a history of being physically and/or verbally abusive (i.e. it is not safe)

2. The person refuses to take anything you say seriously, and will not get that you mean business unless there is a stronger person acting as a reinforcement.

3. The person has a habit of lying and twisting your words. I've read in a Christian counseling site that in such cases, you need to bring a witness along to protect yourself from her lying about the conversation.

Are there other cases you could think of? I want to advise people more carefully from now on, on a case-by-case basis, as well as being more careful for myself.

Click to expand...