I have no courage and losing hope

"Normal" may look completely different for you, friend. Please, don't hurt yourself.

The world sees life as a struggle to "make it". As Christians, our struggle is against sin, and the flesh, and we struggle to love, and to follow Christ. If you are doing thise things, you're doing well.

Lord'sWarrior said:

I don't have the courage to commit suicide and I'm unable to live a normal life (work->home|home->work). I'm too frightened to face the world. I don't know what else to do. I'm losing faith in God. It's been three years since my reconversion to Jesus (or so I think I'm converted) and I don't see that many results. What I see is that I'm more frightened than what I was before.
The only good thing I see from this is that in these three years I've abstained from any form of sexual activity for 4 months in a row. Apart from this I don't see much progress.

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Do you have any aspirations and goals other than recovering?

Also, generally if you focus on being consistent and pushing yourself little by little, in my opinion you'll see the most progress.

Edit: I didn't mean to ignore what you said first. Please do not contemplate suicide. I don't think it would be courageous to do that at all.

Lord'sWarrior said:

I don't have the courage to commit suicide and I'm unable to live a normal life (work->home|home->work). I'm too frightened to face the world. I don't know what else to do. I'm losing faith in God. It's been three years since my reconversion to Jesus (or so I think I'm converted) and I don't see that many results. What I see is that I'm more frightened than what I was before.
The only good thing I see from this is that in these three years I've abstained from any form of sexual activity for 4 months in a row. Apart from this I don't see much progress.

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What I see reading this is that you are placing your hope in your own progress of righteousness. If that is the case, let me remind you that our salvation is dependent on His righteousness..His Faithfulness and His completing that which He began.

Philippians 1:6 (KJV) Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:

Lord'sWarrior said:

I don't have the courage to commit suicide and I'm unable to live a normal life (work->home|home->work). I'm too frightened to face the world. I don't know what else to do. I'm losing faith in God. It's been three years since my reconversion to Jesus (or so I think I'm converted) and I don't see that many results. What I see is that I'm more frightened than what I was before.
The only good thing I see from this is that in these three years I've abstained from any form of sexual activity for 4 months in a row. Apart from this I don't see much progress.

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I have felt hopeless at times, and it's a horrible feeling. There's always hope!!! I pray that you will be filled with the hope and joy of the Lord!

I urge you to post a prayer request on the prayer wall and speak to a chaplain.

Lord'sWarrior said:

I don't have the courage to commit suicide and I'm unable to live a normal life (work->home|home->work). I'm too frightened to face the world. I don't know what else to do. I'm losing faith in God. It's been three years since my reconversion to Jesus (or so I think I'm converted) and I don't see that many results. What I see is that I'm more frightened than what I was before.
The only good thing I see from this is that in these three years I've abstained from any form of sexual activity for 4 months in a row. Apart from this I don't see much progress.

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Much Progress ? Brother , abstaining from sexual activity in this day and age is one of the most difficult aspects of Christianity although many people wink at this . Paul said , he works even more than others ( then he corrects himself ) and says , yet not I but the spirit that works in me . Brother , I just wanted to encourage you to keep abstaining by God's grace . You know one thing about the gospel that I never knew ? The good news that I don't have to "Be" anything... for in Christ , I am more than any human has a right to be ..Not in myself for in my flesh dwells no good thing and it was buried with Christ . Abide in Him my brother . Depression may be from the enemy saying you are no good , not important , have no worth , etc. Jesus said to agree with your adversary while you are in the way lest he deliver you to the jailer ....I know this sounds counter-intuitive but when you feel down ...agree with your adversary and then laugh and praise God for His Son ...for truly HE is worthy but we are just flesh ...every one of us ..when I feel like that , I agree ...Yep ..I have nothing of worth for I was born in sin but praise God for Christ Jesus for in Him we are more than conquerors . By the way ..the world ( which is lost ) wants you to " Be Successful " . Don't fall for it . Keep looking to Jesus ! Do not look to yourself ..you will only find flesh . I hope to see you on that day . Grace and peace through Jesus .

Lord'sWarrior said:

I don't have the courage to commit suicide and I'm unable to live a normal life (work->home|home->work). I'm too frightened to face the world. I don't know what else to do. I'm losing faith in God. It's been three years since my reconversion to Jesus (or so I think I'm converted) and I don't see that many results. What I see is that I'm more frightened than what I was before.
The only good thing I see from this is that in these three years I've abstained from any form of sexual activity for 4 months in a row. Apart from this I don't see much progress.

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Ruach ha Kodesh Breathe into you new life, in the Name of Yahshua ha Mashiach...ask Abba to be your courage, your thoughts, your imagination, your walk..."23The steps of a man are ordered by the LORD, and He delights in his way." (Psalms 37:23).

Remember the works He has prepared you to do, He empowers us to carry them out:

"12Therefore, my beloved, just as you have always obeyed, not only in my presence, but now even more in my absence, continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling. 13For it is God who works in you to will and to act on behalf of His good pleasure." (philippians 2:12-13)

"10For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance as our way of life." (Ephesians 2:10)

The only hope (or unhope) the enemy has is that you will not know his demise...all he can do is attempt to spread confusion, because he knows that when you realize this, and you see through the illusion...his works are at your mercy...THE ENEMY FEARS YOU!

*The enemy's work is to steal, kill, and destroy...you, @Lord'sWarrior, are not called to this...you are called to give of your belongings, your bodily energy, and the spiritual life...impart the Word unto others. As the Lord's Warriors, we are subject to great attacks that would destroy us, but we have an incorruptible Seed within us...fight the good fight...go down swinging!

Lord'sWarrior said:

I don't have the courage to commit suicide and I'm unable to live a normal life (work->home|home->work). I'm too frightened to face the world. I don't know what else to do. I'm losing faith in God. It's been three years since my reconversion to Jesus (or so I think I'm converted) and I don't see that many results. What I see is that I'm more frightened than what I was before.
The only good thing I see from this is that in these three years I've abstained from any form of sexual activity for 4 months in a row. Apart from this I don't see much progress.

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Well the fear/anxiety end of things is going to be something you will need to deal with. God I think often makes us face these things because it does in the long run if we trust in Him, build our Faith and our relationship with him. If there is way to be treated for anxiety, phobias etc. then seek that. If you do not have insurance, money or the right diagnosis to have that paid for or covered then you may have to avail yourself of self help.

I will add I have some problems with that sort of thing myself in spite of my background in psychology using things like various cognitive behavioral therapy approaches especially Rational Emotive therapy books and videos. There are two basic causes of anxiety. Some of the talking therapies get to the screwed up thinking that can cause some of it, but some causes run deeper than that (more in the brain stem area rather than the cerebellum). For those deeper problems hypnosis, drugs and other kinds of treatments can help you.


PS - Your lack of courage in suicide is a good thing! Based on my studies of the Bible and Christian theology, I believe that taking suicide as an out for the hardships of life is a very dubious proposition! While I have thought about this myself many times, I believe this is putting yourself in serious mortal jeopardy.

1 Corinthians 10:13 King James Version (KJV)
13 There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.

I think for the most part suicide is an expression of the lack of Faith in God, or at least it is people trying to force their will on the situation and hoping God will somehow understand and comply.

And of course another issue is the commandment "Thou shalt not kill (Murder)" besides applying to other people also applies to ourselves. But anyway, I've seen from my own life that God's grace is the most active and visible, when the chips are down and you are at the end of your rope. So hang in there!

Lord'sWarrior said:

I don't have the courage to commit suicide and I'm unable to live a normal life (work->home|home->work). I'm too frightened to face the world. I don't know what else to do. I'm losing faith in God. It's been three years since my reconversion to Jesus (or so I think I'm converted) and I don't see that many results. What I see is that I'm more frightened than what I was before.
The only good thing I see from this is that in these three years I've abstained from any form of sexual activity for 4 months in a row. Apart from this I don't see much progress.

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Listen man, there is one thing I want you to know. Jesus loves you no matter if you can hold your own or not. Do you trust in him? (Mark 10:15) If so, you know you have the strength to live until he calls you home. God is at work in you. (Ephesians 2:10)

1st.. He is in now way mad upset with you. He is for you not against you. He will never leave you. To many times we walk by how we FEEL HEAR and SEE. We walk by faith.. faith in that.. what He said. HE WILL do.. no maybe no might. but WILL. See its ALL HIM.. He does it all..,

The joy of the lord is your strength. Be strong in the lord in the power of HIS might. And then the peace of God, which transcends all our powers of thought, will be a garrison to guard your hearts and minds in union with Christ Jesus. For you... Isa 41 10 "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand" "There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus"

We put on the whole armor of GOD! Jesus said..Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid"

I can keep going.. each what I just posted.. a GOD that lives in you HE said it.. the enemy comes in to kill steal and destroy. See God has not given you the spirit of fear but of power and love and a SOUND MIND! All again what I posted are promises for YOU! Not based on how you FEEL HEAR OR SEE! He said it HE WILL do it.

This is all you have to do "When Jesus had entered Capernaum, a centurion came to him, asking for help. LORD, he said, my servant lies at home paralyzed, suffering terribly. Jesus said to him, Shall I come and heal him? The centurion replied, LORD, I do not deserve to have you come under my roof. But just say the word, and my servant will be healed. For I myself am a man under authority, with soldiers under me. I tell this one, 'Go,' and he goes; and that one, 'Come,' and he comes. I say to my servant, 'Do this,' and he does it." When Jesus heard this, he was amazed and said to those following him, Truly I tell you, I have not found anyone in Israel with such great faith"

See Jesus already spoke the word.. no matter now dark HE WILL ALWAYS be there! Just receive.. and as a believer in Yeshua/Jesus.. I have authority over all darkness and I bind the spirit of suicide ... and replace it with the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your heart and mind through Christ Jesus.... in JESUS name. So resist the enemy he has to flee..

I get this this.."For His anger is but for a moment, His favor is for a lifetime; Weeping may last for the night, But a shout of joy comes in the morning." Joy IS COMING

Blade said:

He is in now way mad upset with you.

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Post deleted.

nvm

Lord'sWarrior said:

I don't have the courage to commit suicide and I'm unable to live a normal life (work->home|home->work). I'm too frightened to face the world. I don't know what else to do. I'm losing faith in God. It's been three years since my reconversion to Jesus (or so I think I'm converted) and I don't see that many results. What I see is that I'm more frightened than what I was before.
The only good thing I see from this is that in these three years I've abstained from any form of sexual activity for 4 months in a row. Apart from this I don't see much progress.

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Suicide draws other people away from Jesus Christ. You would do your community a huge disservice to do such a thing. I assume your a christian. You seem like a very thoughtful person. Don't do it is all i can say. I would consider moving out into the woods or to Alaska if finances is major issue. Definitely seek medical help. As for if you die a natural death, you have nothing to fear. If you move to Alaska and get killed by a bear, you'll instantly be with Jesus in paradise.

Please don't commit suicide. Do your brothers and sisters a huge favor and be strong.

Seems to me that you need some counseling my friend. I'm requesting a staff member here to contact you. I'll be praying for you. Be strong in the Lord. I say it again, "be strong in the Lord."

Lord'sWarrior said:

I don't have the courage to commit suicide and I'm unable to live a normal life (work->home|home->work). I'm too frightened to face the world. I don't know what else to do. I'm losing faith in God. It's been three years since my reconversion to Jesus (or so I think I'm converted) and I don't see that many results. What I see is that I'm more frightened than what I was before.
The only good thing I see from this is that in these three years I've abstained from any form of sexual activity for 4 months in a row. Apart from this I don't see much progress.

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Pray without ceasing and don't give up brother.

I was in a suicidal meltdown 4 months ago. God saved me from killing myself the day before I planned to commit. There are times when I question my conversion too, but if God didn't Save me I wouldn't be here.

Remember that it isn't in God's will that anyone should perish, and that He will never forsake you. Your true brother's and sisters will be there to carry your burdens. God has everything under control; trust in Him and He'll pull you out.

I'm glad to hear you're able to abstain from sexual activity. Bless you brother and stay strong. I'll be praying for you.

Someone I know recently went through this but pressed in hard to be healed and was delivered.
Want to contact him?

I also go this an worse at times. I suggest that you ask for God to recreate your brain, and to deliver you permanently from the dark could over the head.

Ask for gifts of the Spirit for encouragement. There is a division in these forums for just that, unless you can get them first hand at church.