I am a college freshman. I was approached by a really nice student a few months ago who was conducting a survey about how different Christians interpreted the Bible. She invited me to attend her Bible study, and I did.
Their purpose in this Bible study is to not focus as much on what each denomination says about the Bible, but instead of assuming or speculating, only interpret the Bible for what it says. We analyze scripture and compare verses in one part of the Bible to another, drawing parallels about recurring parables (like how anytime the Bible mentions weapons and tools, it is talking about the Word, and how anytime animals are mentioned, they represent people/humanity).
My Christian faith is not as strong as I want it to be. I've grown up in a very Baptist family, with very strong beliefs about particular interpretations. These beliefs are so strong that I am often left believing in certain things just because my family believes, as opposed to knowing
why they believe. This has caused me to question a lot of things and struggle with maintaining a strong relationship with God as I've gotten older. Because of this, finding a Bible study that finally showed me concrete evidence of what the Bible really means was truly a relief for me.
Weeks and months went by, and I'd attend a Bible study each week. Each lesson became more difficult for me to believe, and yet there was evidence in the Bible (at least according to how it is interpreted). We began by talking about how every Old Testament prophecy was fulfilled already (even the ones often interpreted by many Christians to be prophecies for after the New Testament), such as the prophecy that the Lord will come to Earth with fire...because fire isn't real fire, but instead the Word. This means that when Jesus returns to Earth again, he will not come in an apocalyptic way, but instead through the teachings of his Word. Ehh, maybe. Then as the Bible studies passed, the interpretations were more and more controversial. The Flood wasn't not a worldwide flood, but instead only in that region (the volume of water on the Earth today could not cover the whole surface that it would cover the highest mountains, but would mathematically cover that whole region; records of ancient Chinese civilizations from that time period hold no history of a flood; it is not fair to the people living in other parts of the world that were not introduced to the Word of God, were kangaroos on the ark, too? etc.). This made sense, so I went with it. Next, we talked about how the first sin, leading to the Fall, is sexual, not the consumption of actual fruit (tree of life = Adam, tree of knowledge of good and evil = Eve, eating the fruit = having sex, that is why they were ashamed of being naked, that is why Eve/women experience pains in childbirth = she became pregnant with Cain from this, and he created murder). This also made sense, because we found scriptures across the Bible that referred to Adam, and mankind, as being a "tree of life". Then we talked about how the Trinity is actually three separate beings, and the Holy Spirit is a female, mother figure (wisdom/Holy Spirit referred to as a "she", Creation story says "create mankind in OUR image, Holy Spirit is referred to with words like "wonderful counselor", "comforter", etc.).
These go against a lot of the teachings that I am used to. While I am hesitant to believe some of them, because I am so rooted in the Baptist faith, I shouldn't turn a blind eye to other interpretations and assume that everything about my faith is 100% correct. I have not mentioned the specific teachings to my parents, because their undying Baptist beliefs will immediately cause them to shut off my explanations and say it's wrong (I already tried to tell the Flood story to my dad, without saying where I heard it from, and he said no way), so I feel like they would be biased. (That's why I am posting here).
Yesterday, my Bible study friends invited me to go to church with them. Turns out, it's a house church where they and a group of friends go and watch a recording of a church service in Korea. The preacher's photos were on the walls of the room, and the service only sang songs that the man had written himself. (He, and my Bible study friends, believe that you are to be the bride of God. In the Old Testament, you are his servant, in the New Testament, you are his child, and in the Completed Testament/modern-day, you are his bride. Not sexually, but with how much you love him, and he loves humanity...Adam and Eve were created for this purpose, but their sin caused them to Fall from their higher rank all the way to the servant-level. So this preacher wrote his own songs to talk about being God's bride instead of his child, which are what other Christian songs are about.) The church members sing about/pray to the Holy Trinity (okay, so God's Trinity).
This preacher's message talked about how the Resurrection of Jesus in the Bible was not a physical resurrection, but spiritual. Any encounters people had with Jesus after his death was through dreams and visions, and that there is historical evidence that Jesus's body was discovered, labeled Jesus of Nazareth, along with Mary, Joseph, and Martha (10 in total). This I do not fully understand, because what about the tomb being empty? What about the holes in his hands and in his side? Did the disciples only see him and touch him in dreams and visions (supposedly why he was able to get in the room when the doors were locked, because he was in spiritual form).
Another thing that confused me was how much they seemed to focus on the preacher himself. They celebrated him and his works (building a monument/temple from rocks, healing people...they said
he healed people, not God through his prayers...etc.), because they were celebrating the 1-year anniversary since he made it out of prison (10-year sentence from being prosecuted for his beliefs). He talks about how God has shared these new beliefs/interpretations to him as he fasts, and he first discovered God when he was young and starving with his family in the woods, and that he was chosen by God to lead this new Christian movement. The way that these people looked up to him
so much...it was concerning. It was as if they were putting him up too high on a pedestal that he should not be on. (He's still a
person, no matter if God has chosen him or not. That's the point of God choosing people in the Bible--Abraham, David, Paul, Peter, etc.--they are still
people who make mistakes.
After the service, I went home and researched his church. It is called Providence, led and founded by Jung Myung-seok (
About Pastor Jung Myung Seok). I quickly found many websites (practically all of my search results) calling his church a cult. I even watched a 20-minute video where people who used to be a part of Providence are telling their stories about how their faith was ruined, and that he did not go to prison for religious persecution, but instead sexual assault and rape. It said that he recruits beautiful women through secular organizations and Bible studies, and he would have them send him letters and their photos in prison, which he posted on his walls and stroke them. They would also pray to photos of him and Jesus side-by-side.
I am hesitant to believe everything the Internet tells me, because people lie, and if he was truly persecuted for his faith, and people are afraid of change, so it would make sense that they would try to find/create dirt on him, but I don't want to ignore these claims, either. While the Bible studies make sense, they are a drastic change to my Baptist beliefs. Slap on top of that, and I do not think I am a strong enough Christian to be able to tell what is right and wrong when it comes to interpreting the Bible properly. I just want to strengthen my faith, but I am torn. If this is a cult, I want out. But these were my first (and only, really) college friends, and they are so kind and love God so much. It is difficult to believe that they are just recruiting me for their cult, but that is the whole point of cults...you fool people into joining them.
What should I do? Should I back out now? Should I just ghost my friends, or tell them I'm not coming back? (If I tell them I'm not coming back, should I tell them why?) Should I try to talk to my parents anyway, despite their bias? Should I keep going to Bible study and just ask more questions to try and figure out which is true? (Do I have the spiritual capacity to do such a thing?) Should I confront my friends about being a cult?
I know this is super-long, but I really appreciate you reading it! I am really struggling here.
