Relationship with someone of weak faith

twelveplus_5 · Jan 28, 2019

I’m a Senior in HS and going to the same college as my girlfriend (coincidentally)...
I’m in a serious relationship with this wonderful girl. She makes me happy, loves me unconditionally, we respect each other immensely, and always seek to understand each other, and I can talk with her about *almost* anything. I would consider myself strong in faith, and I want to raise a strong in faith family with Christian values, and grow closer to God. I desire God...my girlfriend grew up Catholic, but has since waivers from Catholicism and shifted more towards my faith: Baptist...and me being with her has made her grow closer to the Lord (and visa versa)...so all good, right? No. I can’t ignore the feeling that she doesn’t prioritize God over all else. She rarely has brought Him up, usually it’s me who leads those conversations, and she isn’t very knowledgeable about the Bible...she claims that she wants to be closer to God, but seems sheepish every time we talk about Christianity! She loves going to church, but doesn’t get involved in conversation about God...Weak in faith/understanding is the only term I can use to describe her...she doesn’t seem to DESIRE God...almost just acknowledges that he is there.
My question is: what should I do? I love her so dearly, but I have concerns about her faith...
P.S I have not talked with her about this subject...I continue to bring it up, not shoving the Bible in her face, and I have not questioned her faith...

Jonaitis · Jan 28, 2019

I was in a similar situation in HS, and after we broke up I found out she had no interest in God anymore. I wonder if she even cares, brother, for the Lord's sake or for yours? It is a quality she sees in you, the person she likes, and may appear to like it on the surface level for you. I'm just saying

Jonaitis · Jan 28, 2019

Here's my advice:

Continually bring up your faith, take her into conversations that convict, encourage, and strengthen your faith. Do a consistent bible study with her. Try to build her up stronger in the faith. Immerse the time with her in the Lord, and explains that's the purpose of your relationship is to center it on the Lord and to raise your future children that way. For Christians, there is no ultimate point of marriage except Christ be in it, around it, and with it everywhere.

Either by God's grace, she will be more serious, or by God's grace she will squirm out of the relationship.

From the past relationships I've had with such people, I regret beginning them. Look for someone who is as serious as you, it is worth the wait.

gym_class_hero · Jan 28, 2019

if she was just a friend and not a girlfriend would you abandon your friendship with her because her walk was in a different place than yours? Of course not(hopefully). As long as she is not negatively affecting your walk, you should do your best to encourage her without "beating her up with the Bible." But you are thinking wisely about any future marriage. we are not to be unequally yoked. You 2 are very young, there will be time (Gods time) to work this all out. God bless you.

SirHash · Jan 28, 2019

Hey twelveplus_5 I think you two are not not-equally-yoked...a double negative, you're totally equally yolked. Ya'll aren't married yet so I encourage you to leave your girl's relationship with Jesus between her and Jesus. As you (you plural-both of you) proceed closer to marriage (or not) both of you'll grow closer to Him and each other.

Sketcher · Jan 28, 2019

twelveplus_5 said:
I’m a Senior in HS and going to the same college as my girlfriend (coincidentally)...
I’m in a serious relationship with this wonderful girl. She makes me happy, loves me unconditionally, we respect each other immensely, and always seek to understand each other, and I can talk with her about *almost* anything. I would consider myself strong in faith, and I want to raise a strong in faith family with Christian values, and grow closer to God. I desire God...my girlfriend grew up Catholic, but has since waivers from Catholicism and shifted more towards my faith: Baptist...and me being with her has made her grow closer to the Lord (and visa versa)...so all good, right? No. I can’t ignore the feeling that she doesn’t prioritize God over all else. She rarely has brought Him up, usually it’s me who leads those conversations, and she isn’t very knowledgeable about the Bible...she claims that she wants to be closer to God, but seems sheepish every time we talk about Christianity! She loves going to church, but doesn’t get involved in conversation about God...Weak in faith/understanding is the only term I can use to describe her...she doesn’t seem to DESIRE God...almost just acknowledges that he is there.
My question is: what should I do? I love her so dearly, but I have concerns about her faith...
P.S I have not talked with her about this subject...I continue to bring it up, not shoving the Bible in her face, and I have not questioned her faith...

Let's look at what's concrete here before passing judgment.

twelveplus_5 said:
She rarely has brought Him up, usually it’s me who leads those conversations

Not an indicator of weak faith or low-priority faith. At all.

twelveplus_5 said:
she isn’t very knowledgeable about the Bible

That can be easily changed by studying it.

twelveplus_5 said:
she claims that she wants to be closer to God, but seems sheepish every time we talk about Christianity!

Could be a lot of intimidation here. Part of it may be toward you - maybe she's afraid you'll be less than impressed with where she's at if she tries to say something spiritual. Maybe that's compounded by a lack of skill in articulating it. Another part of it might be her Catholic upbringing - there are lots of different kinds of Catholics, but many aren't trained in witnessing and sharing testimony, and studying Scripture as a lot of Protestants are. For some, it's even taboo - you go to Mass, receive your sacrament, and get on with your life. If she's coming out of that, there's religious intimidation she needs to work through, not just the boyfriend intimidation which she could easily have.

twelveplus_5 said:
She loves going to church

A good sign.

If this relationship is going to have a future, you need to respect her for where she is at, and patiently let her grow in her faith. What was Jesus's character?

"A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not quench, until he brings justice to victory" - Matthew 12:20

Give her that same care. Part of this means not patronizing her.

A Realist · Jan 29, 2019

Sketcher said:
If this relationship is going to have a future, you need to respect her for where she is at, and patiently let her grow in her faith.

Best advise. If you start hammering her over the head with the bible, they you're going to drive her away for sure.

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Relationship with someone of weak faith

twelveplus_5

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Jonaitis

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