Should I enter into a relationship with a non-Christian? (situation explained)

chevyontheriver said:

It's her vocation in life, if you marry, to help get you into heaven. Would she accept that vocation?

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She doesn't believe in God; how can she "help him get into heaven?"

Trayalc said:

So recently I've been approached by a female friend of mine who thinks we should be more than friends. Usually I don't have any problem giving a "yes" or "no" answer when I'm approached about things like this, but for some reason I'm having a really hard time deciding this time. I'm not sure where my feelings are at; sometimes I feel I'd rather be single right now, and sometimes I think we'd be good together.

Her beliefs are interesting. She basically has an agnostic stance on the topic of God; that is, she doesn't believe in God, but she believes He could exist. At the same time, she sees the Christian lifestyle as life-bettering and is actively involved in a college ministry.

I was told by someone that I would have to be the spiritual leader in our relationship, but I honestly don't know if I'm able to do that at this moment. I've fallen into some bad old habits, and I've been neglecting God for several months now. I don't know whether it's best to remain single and work on my relationship with God right now or to enter into a relationship with this girl who seems to care a lot about me. How can I tell whether or not God is in support of this relationship, if there is a way to tell? Thanks for reading.

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The only problem I see is if you were to start dating obviously you would want her to become a Christian if your relationship is to move forward so the question is would she be accepting Christ for you or for Him and would it be a genuine acceptance. I think it’s best to have only one motive for accepting Christ.

Trayalc said:

I was told by someone that I would have to be the spiritual leader in our relationship, but I honestly don't know if I'm able to do that at this moment. I've fallen into some bad old habits, and I've been neglecting God for several months now. I don't know whether it's best to remain single and work on my relationship with God right now or to enter into a relationship with this girl who seems to care a lot about me. How can I tell whether or not God is in support of this relationship, if there is a way to tell? Thanks for reading.

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An unbeliever is unquestionably no...but sounds like you are a no as well.
Find the book, "I Kissed dating Goodbye."
relationships and dating are BS. A Christian should only be "dating" to find a spouse. If not 100% committed to the marriage concept, its an easy call. Speaking from experience...grace to you!

Trayalc said:

She's had a crush on me for several years now. We started spending more time together recently because we do enjoy each other's company. So she was naturally curious what my feelings were toward her since we were hanging out more. One night we had a discussion about it, and when I told her my uncertainties about becoming boyfriend and girlfriend, that's when she began to give me reasons of why she thought we'd be good together.



As for what I'm looking for right now, I am certainly not looking for marriage. I'm looking for a long term relationship at most, but I think that might be even pushing outside my comfort zone at the moment.

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The problem might be that you don't have abundance mentality. Remember that if something doesn't work, there are thousands of women there with qualities you admire.

How do we learn except by experience.

"Do not be unevenly yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? Or what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever? What agreement has the temple of God with idols? We are the temple of the living God" (2 Corinthians 6:14-16).

This is worth listening to. If the apostle Paul said that the married experience anxieties and will have their interests divided, how to please their spouse, how much more will you suffer when the relationship you are in isn't at all Christian? Whereas, you find your joy in Christ. She doesn't. You find it important to preach the gospel to the lost. She doesn't. You will strive with her when it comes to making Christ a priority in your life, or you will be compromising to make her happy. I've been down this road before, missionary dating is much worse in practice than in theory, it doesn't work. You will be more depressed, more alone, than you were before you both entered the relationship, because you both have different worldviews and different tastes. You should find a woman attractive for her love for Christ, her deep sense for holiness, and her life full of virtue, rather than the vanities that the world merely looks to.

Like the saying goes, Are we stronger than Samson or wiser than Solomon? Look to them for such example in the Scriptures.

Trayalc said:

So recently I've been approached by a female friend of mine who thinks we should be more than friends. Usually I don't have any problem giving a "yes" or "no" answer when I'm approached about things like this, but for some reason I'm having a really hard time deciding this time. I'm not sure where my feelings are at; sometimes I feel I'd rather be single right now, and sometimes I think we'd be good together.

Her beliefs are interesting. She basically has an agnostic stance on the topic of God; that is, she doesn't believe in God, but she believes He could exist. At the same time, she sees the Christian lifestyle as life-bettering and is actively involved in a college ministry.

I was told by someone that I would have to be the spiritual leader in our relationship, but I honestly don't know if I'm able to do that at this moment. I've fallen into some bad old habits, and I've been neglecting God for several months now. I don't know whether it's best to remain single and work on my relationship with God right now or to enter into a relationship with this girl who seems to care a lot about me. How can I tell whether or not God is in support of this relationship, if there is a way to tell? Thanks for reading.

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She is probably still young and is at the "millennial" mindset that will eventually grow out of her, but she has to be with the right people. Don't go too hardcore christian by flooding her with Bible studies and mandatory church stuff every sunday. Bring in the spiritual stuff slowly so she adjusts to it. Just play the cool christian and let God grow in her through your influence.

Strong in Him said:

She doesn't believe in God; how can she "help him get into heaven?"

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Then maybe he is unwise to be in a relationship with her.

Trayalc said:

So recently I've been approached by a female friend of mine who thinks we should be more than friends. Usually I don't have any problem giving a "yes" or "no" answer when I'm approached about things like this, but for some reason I'm having a really hard time deciding this time. I'm not sure where my feelings are at; sometimes I feel I'd rather be single right now, and sometimes I think we'd be good together.

Her beliefs are interesting. She basically has an agnostic stance on the topic of God; that is, she doesn't believe in God, but she believes He could exist. At the same time, she sees the Christian lifestyle as life-bettering and is actively involved in a college ministry.

I was told by someone that I would have to be the spiritual leader in our relationship, but I honestly don't know if I'm able to do that at this moment. I've fallen into some bad old habits, and I've been neglecting God for several months now. I don't know whether it's best to remain single and work on my relationship with God right now or to enter into a relationship with this girl who seems to care a lot about me. How can I tell whether or not God is in support of this relationship, if there is a way to tell? Thanks for reading.

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God commanded us not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers in 2 Corinthians 6:14. It's not a good idea to start a relationship outside the boundaries of what God has ordained. Especially if you have neglected God then of course you should reestablish your devotion as you will be the spiritual leader. How you worship God will effect the other person

2 Corinthians 6:14-15 NKJV "Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever?"

A believer marrying an unbeliever invites a multitude of problems into his or her life, problems which which will have great impact on their children.

I'm wondering Trayaic, you mentioned the young lady is on the fence where you are certain of God, but that is not a test of being yolked. Belief is not in God but in His Kingdom (leadership) over the leadership of the world of man. His Kingdom come, His will be done in earth.
The Adversary and the demons knew God also. Are you yolked to them? Actually ironically you and all of us are, simply because we all tend to put the will of man before the will of God making us adversaries like them.
So to be truly yolked to God, you both have to be following His will (which is loving neighbour as self) and separating yourself from the world of man. If you have not then you are yolked together, but in the world of man and no different than each other as you seek your way out. Hope that helps.

Trayalc said:

So recently I've been approached by a female friend of mine who thinks we should be more than friends. Usually I don't have any problem giving a "yes" or "no" answer when I'm approached about things like this, but for some reason I'm having a really hard time deciding this time. I'm not sure where my feelings are at; sometimes I feel I'd rather be single right now, and sometimes I think we'd be good together.

Her beliefs are interesting. She basically has an agnostic stance on the topic of God; that is, she doesn't believe in God, but she believes He could exist. At the same time, she sees the Christian lifestyle as life-bettering and is actively involved in a college ministry.

I was told by someone that I would have to be the spiritual leader in our relationship, but I honestly don't know if I'm able to do that at this moment. I've fallen into some bad old habits, and I've been neglecting God for several months now. I don't know whether it's best to remain single and work on my relationship with God right now or to enter into a relationship with this girl who seems to care a lot about me. How can I tell whether or not God is in support of this relationship, if there is a way to tell? Thanks for reading.

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Remain friends and continue discussing each other's beliefs until she becomes a Christian. That's the biblical pattern.

Trayalc said:

So recently I've been approached by a female friend of mine who thinks we should be more than friends. Usually I don't have any problem giving a "yes" or "no" answer when I'm approached about things like this, but for some reason I'm having a really hard time deciding this time. I'm not sure where my feelings are at; sometimes I feel I'd rather be single right now, and sometimes I think we'd be good together.

Her beliefs are interesting. She basically has an agnostic stance on the topic of God; that is, she doesn't believe in God, but she believes He could exist. At the same time, she sees the Christian lifestyle as life-bettering and is actively involved in a college ministry.

I was told by someone that I would have to be the spiritual leader in our relationship, but I honestly don't know if I'm able to do that at this moment. I've fallen into some bad old habits, and I've been neglecting God for several months now. I don't know whether it's best to remain single and work on my relationship with God right now or to enter into a relationship with this girl who seems to care a lot about me. How can I tell whether or not God is in support of this relationship, if there is a way to tell? Thanks for reading.

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No.