My best friend turned out to be an atheist...

hiwaystar

Active Member
May 30, 2018
46
55
26
Good ole 'Merica
✟18,144.00
Country
United States
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Private
So...I've had this friend for like 5 years. Let's call him Leo. I viewed him as one of my best friends (whilst Jesus is my best best friend!!!) and we adore each other's work. To be specific, we were in the same band (a secular one at my high school though). Leo played the bass and he was AWESOME. I swear I can feel God's energy flowing in his fingers. I loved his playing and he loved my playing. God even told me that He has blessed Leo with talent and I must cherish him. If Leo had any drawback, it'd be that he wasn't Christian...but I understand this is a secular society and I have never took that personally.

But this week a shocking revelation occurred...Leo turned out to be an aggressive atheist. A mutual friend told me that he chose atheism as a project in one of his classes and preached atheistic ideology. I was shocked. I never could've imagined such a wonderful friend could be such a godless monster! What's frightening is that he never told me about this! But to me personally, what's more unacceptable is that how could God ever, EVER have had blessed this monster with talent? For the first time, I felt as if God had pulled a prank on me!

And needless to say, the first thing I did was ask God. God told me that He's been intending this as a lesson of forgiveness all along. He wants to see if I'd still accept this long-time friend even if he turns out to be a mocker. And I didn't know what to respond...

I have already quit the band and unfriended Leo. I simply personally can't accept an atheist friend. I'm devastated. I'm lost. I don't think I understand God anymore. I haven't prayed for days because I don't know how to face God. Why would God want me to love someone who hates Him? What should I do now?
 
  • Friendly
Reactions: JazzHands

dysert

Member
Feb 29, 2012
6,233
2,238
USA
✟112,984.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
My best friend early in my career was a die-hard atheist. We were good friends, working together, playing tennis, going to each other's houses, etc. You can be friends with an atheist with no problem. I hope you didn't burn a bridge. If I were you I'd apologize and try to rekindle the relationship. (And I don't think we *ever* understand God, so for you to say you don't understand Him "anymore" sounds odd.)
 
Upvote 0

Just Another User

Active Member
Nov 24, 2018
169
126
The United part
✟15,817.00
Country
United Kingdom
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
Brother, it may be sad that this good friend of yours is not in the light of our God but this shouldn't be a reason to break your friendship with him. What does our God say about our enemies (even if your friend could be classed as one).

"But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you" Love him my friend. Love him like you never have before. Love him as best as you can and try to go a bit further. No matter what he chooses to believe.

And lets not forget. Weren't we all enemies of God before we came to know Jesus the King? Didn't we all hate the ancient of days? If our Father was merciful enough to send his Son to free us from our slavery for sin shouldn't you want to follow such unconditional love?

Let him have his choice of being an atheist. You can't force him to follow the Lord. Live a righteous life full of abounding love and be indiscriminate with it. Not matter who it is. Live a life a generosity and be prepared to give anything for your siblings in Christ. To be in poverty for him. Follow the road that Christ traveled and even the greatest skeptics will turn their head and ask the reason for why you have this hope?
 
Upvote 0

“Paisios”

Sinner
Site Supporter
Aug 8, 2014
2,876
4,622
55
✟594,142.00
Country
United States
Faith
Eastern Orthodox
Marital Status
Married
Why would God want me to love someone who hates Him? What should I do now?
Because God Himself loves those who hate Him, and tells us “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy’, but I say to you ,love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in Heaven...’”. (Matthew 5:43-45 NKJV)
 
Upvote 0

Andrew77

The walking accident
Site Supporter
Feb 11, 2018
1,912
1,242
Ohio
✟138,616.00
Country
United States
Faith
Non-Denom
Marital Status
Single
Politics
US-Constitution
So...I've had this friend for like 5 years. Let's call him Leo. I viewed him as one of my best friends (whilst Jesus is my best best friend!!!) and we adore each other's work. To be specific, we were in the same band (a secular one at my high school though). Leo played the bass and he was AWESOME. I swear I can feel God's energy flowing in his fingers. I loved his playing and he loved my playing. God even told me that He has blessed Leo with talent and I must cherish him. If Leo had any drawback, it'd be that he wasn't Christian...but I understand this is a secular society and I have never took that personally.

But this week a shocking revelation occurred...Leo turned out to be an aggressive atheist. A mutual friend told me that he chose atheism as a project in one of his classes and preached atheistic ideology. I was shocked. I never could've imagined such a wonderful friend could be such a godless monster! What's frightening is that he never told me about this! But to me personally, what's more unacceptable is that how could God ever, EVER have had blessed this monster with talent? For the first time, I felt as if God had pulled a prank on me!

And needless to say, the first thing I did was ask God. God told me that He's been intending this as a lesson of forgiveness all along. He wants to see if I'd still accept this long-time friend even if he turns out to be a mocker. And I didn't know what to respond...

I have already quit the band and unfriended Leo. I simply personally can't accept an atheist friend. I'm devastated. I'm lost. I don't think I understand God anymore. I haven't prayed for days because I don't know how to face God. Why would God want me to love someone who hates Him? What should I do now?

I am appalled.

Why would you do this? How can you reach the lost, when you call them monsters, and block them out of your life?

I have dozens of pagan friends, that no more believe in G-d, than I worship satan. How do you have a good influence, doing what you did? What does that guy think of Jesus Christ now? After how you just treated him?
 
Upvote 0

Halbhh

Everything You say is Life to me
Site Supporter
Mar 17, 2015
17,193
9,201
catholic -- embracing all Christians
✟1,158,778.00
Country
United States
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
So...I've had this friend for like 5 years. Let's call him Leo. I viewed him as one of my best friends (whilst Jesus is my best best friend!!!) and we adore each other's work. To be specific, we were in the same band (a secular one at my high school though). Leo played the bass and he was AWESOME. I swear I can feel God's energy flowing in his fingers. I loved his playing and he loved my playing. God even told me that He has blessed Leo with talent and I must cherish him. If Leo had any drawback, it'd be that he wasn't Christian...but I understand this is a secular society and I have never took that personally.

But this week a shocking revelation occurred...Leo turned out to be an aggressive atheist. A mutual friend told me that he chose atheism as a project in one of his classes and preached atheistic ideology. I was shocked. I never could've imagined such a wonderful friend could be such a godless monster! What's frightening is that he never told me about this! But to me personally, what's more unacceptable is that how could God ever, EVER have had blessed this monster with talent? For the first time, I felt as if God had pulled a prank on me!

And needless to say, the first thing I did was ask God. God told me that He's been intending this as a lesson of forgiveness all along. He wants to see if I'd still accept this long-time friend even if he turns out to be a mocker. And I didn't know what to respond...

I have already quit the band and unfriended Leo. I simply personally can't accept an atheist friend. I'm devastated. I'm lost. I don't think I understand God anymore. I haven't prayed for days because I don't know how to face God. Why would God want me to love someone who hates Him? What should I do now?
I was in a high school rock band too, and I was the non-believer, and the others it was not clear if or what they believed, but for one, my good friend, it became clear he did believe soon after we graduated.

One of the surprising and important things Jesus tells us is that both the righteous and the unrighteous are treated equally in this life from above --

43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor i and hate your enemy.’ 44 But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45 that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.

Matthew 5 NIV
(and the next 2 verses, 46 and 47 are very very interesting and important for us to take in)

I only knew of this 1 person of the dozens I knew fairly well in high school (and this was decades ago by the way) who was visibly, clearly a believer, my good friend that left at age 19 to go to a seminary to become a minister...

...and at that time I was an atheist myself in my mind, as an idea, like mental thing, an ideology...

Ideology is powerful and can capture the mind, and make the mind captive to it into a kind of soldier, like some talk-show hosts, or leftists, rightists, atheists, etc.

The apostle Paul, before he was "Paul", persecuted believers intensely, even unto their deaths --

Acts 22:4 I persecuted this Way even to the death, detaining both men and women and throwing them into prison,

So, this story of your friend, of his life, is far from over, and it might take decades to play out, but you can show Christ, by doing what Christ Jesus said to you and me we should do, in Matthew chapters 5 through 7. And we learn in chapter 7 we must do as He said in order to endure and make it ourselves (verses 24-27).
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: JazzHands
Upvote 0

Tolworth John

Well-Known Member
Site Supporter
Mar 10, 2017
8,278
4,678
68
Tolworth
✟369,679.00
Country
United Kingdom
Faith
Non-Denom
Marital Status
Married
God told me that He's been intending this as a lesson of forgiveness all along. He wants to see if I'd still accept this long-time friend even if he turns out to be a mocker.

God wants you to be his friend and you the' obedient slave of God' do what....

May I ask do you know why Jesus came?
I've always been taught it was to seek the lost and isn't that what the grat commission is all about, you know preaching to Christians.

May I suggest you humble aplogise toyour best friend and try talking to him.
 
  • Friendly
Reactions: JazzHands
Upvote 0

Dave L

Well-Known Member
Site Supporter
Jun 28, 2018
15,549
5,876
USA
✟580,140.00
Country
United States
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
So...I've had this friend for like 5 years. Let's call him Leo. I viewed him as one of my best friends (whilst Jesus is my best best friend!!!) and we adore each other's work. To be specific, we were in the same band (a secular one at my high school though). Leo played the bass and he was AWESOME. I swear I can feel God's energy flowing in his fingers. I loved his playing and he loved my playing. God even told me that He has blessed Leo with talent and I must cherish him. If Leo had any drawback, it'd be that he wasn't Christian...but I understand this is a secular society and I have never took that personally.

But this week a shocking revelation occurred...Leo turned out to be an aggressive atheist. A mutual friend told me that he chose atheism as a project in one of his classes and preached atheistic ideology. I was shocked. I never could've imagined such a wonderful friend could be such a godless monster! What's frightening is that he never told me about this! But to me personally, what's more unacceptable is that how could God ever, EVER have had blessed this monster with talent? For the first time, I felt as if God had pulled a prank on me!

And needless to say, the first thing I did was ask God. God told me that He's been intending this as a lesson of forgiveness all along. He wants to see if I'd still accept this long-time friend even if he turns out to be a mocker. And I didn't know what to respond...

I have already quit the band and unfriended Leo. I simply personally can't accept an atheist friend. I'm devastated. I'm lost. I don't think I understand God anymore. I haven't prayed for days because I don't know how to face God. Why would God want me to love someone who hates Him? What should I do now?
I gave up a career in music so that I would not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. And God blessed abundantly. I still know many of these people but a tension exists since we don't communicate and run in the same circles we used to.
 
  • Friendly
Reactions: JazzHands
Upvote 0

Albion

Facilitator
Dec 8, 2004
111,138
33,258
✟583,842.00
Country
United States
Faith
Anglican
Marital Status
Married
It seems to me that Jesus taught us to relate to people in a certain way--but that means to people in general.

Not only true believers were the beneficiaries of his instructions as given in the case of the Sermon on the Mount or even with the well-known Golden Rule. And how can any of us minister to the non-believers and possibly bring them to Christ if we cut ourselves off from them totally and make known to them that we completely reject them?
 
Last edited:
  • Agree
Reactions: JazzHands
Upvote 0

eleos1954

God is Love
Site Supporter
Nov 14, 2017
9,808
5,656
Utah
✟721,713.00
Country
United States
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
Politics
US-Others
So...I've had this friend for like 5 years. Let's call him Leo. I viewed him as one of my best friends (whilst Jesus is my best best friend!!!) and we adore each other's work. To be specific, we were in the same band (a secular one at my high school though). Leo played the bass and he was AWESOME. I swear I can feel God's energy flowing in his fingers. I loved his playing and he loved my playing. God even told me that He has blessed Leo with talent and I must cherish him. If Leo had any drawback, it'd be that he wasn't Christian...but I understand this is a secular society and I have never took that personally.

But this week a shocking revelation occurred...Leo turned out to be an aggressive atheist. A mutual friend told me that he chose atheism as a project in one of his classes and preached atheistic ideology. I was shocked. I never could've imagined such a wonderful friend could be such a godless monster! What's frightening is that he never told me about this! But to me personally, what's more unacceptable is that how could God ever, EVER have had blessed this monster with talent? For the first time, I felt as if God had pulled a prank on me!

And needless to say, the first thing I did was ask God. God told me that He's been intending this as a lesson of forgiveness all along. He wants to see if I'd still accept this long-time friend even if he turns out to be a mocker. And I didn't know what to respond...

I have already quit the band and unfriended Leo. I simply personally can't accept an atheist friend. I'm devastated. I'm lost. I don't think I understand God anymore. I haven't prayed for days because I don't know how to face God. Why would God want me to love someone who hates Him? What should I do now?

Did you ever consider that maybe God might use you to reach out to this person?
 
Upvote 0
This site stays free and accessible to all because of donations from people like you.
Consider making a one-time or monthly donation. We appreciate your support!
- Dan Doughty and Team Christian Forums

Radagast

comes and goes
Site Supporter
Dec 10, 2003
23,821
9,817
✟312,047.00
Country
Australia
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
If Leo had any drawback, it'd be that he wasn't Christian...but I understand this is a secular society and I have never took that personally.

But this week a shocking revelation occurred...Leo turned out to be an aggressive atheist.

I'm a bit confused here. You knew your friend was an atheist and then you're shocked that he turned out to be an atheist?

God even told me that He has blessed Leo with talent and I must cherish him.

How did God tell you this?
 
  • Friendly
Reactions: JazzHands
Upvote 0

Sketcher

Born Imperishable
Feb 23, 2004
38,984
9,400
✟380,249.00
Faith
Non-Denom
Marital Status
Single
Politics
US-Republican
But this week a shocking revelation occurred...Leo turned out to be an aggressive atheist. A mutual friend told me that he chose atheism as a project in one of his classes and preached atheistic ideology. I was shocked. I never could've imagined such a wonderful friend could be such a godless monster! What's frightening is that he never told me about this!
Probably because he didn't want to be a jerk to you.

But to me personally, what's more unacceptable is that how could God ever, EVER have had blessed this monster with talent? For the first time, I felt as if God had pulled a prank on me!
1) God blesses people with talent before they choose their religions and worldviews.
2) Why should you feel that way? Compare how you feel about him to the way Jonah felt about the war criminals in Nineveh. Are you more right than he was? And was he right at all?

Leo played the bass and he was AWESOME. I swear I can feel God's energy flowing in his fingers. I loved his playing and he loved my playing. God even told me that He has blessed Leo with talent and I must cherish him.

And needless to say, the first thing I did was ask God. God told me that He's been intending this as a lesson of forgiveness all along. He wants to see if I'd still accept this long-time friend even if he turns out to be a mocker. And I didn't know what to respond...

I have already quit the band and unfriended Leo. I simply personally can't accept an atheist friend. I'm devastated. I'm lost. I don't think I understand God anymore. I haven't prayed for days because I don't know how to face God. Why would God want me to love someone who hates Him? What should I do now?
Seems pretty clear from all this that you screwed up. You owe Leo an apology, and you must repent to God with all your heart. As for our place in this:

All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation;
that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation.
Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God. - 2 Corinthians 5:18-20
Your job as a Christian is to be an ambassador for God, to reach out to people who are far from God, and help bring them to peace with God. This is not mutually exclusive with the work of Christ or the Holy Spirit. Rather, this is what the Apostles did. Your attitude as described to us derailed you from that mission. Time to repent, ask God for a spirit of love, and get back on the tracks.
 
Upvote 0

aiki

Regular Member
Feb 16, 2007
10,874
4,349
Winnipeg
✟236,538.00
Country
Canada
Faith
Baptist
Marital Status
Married
I swear I can feel God's energy flowing in his fingers.

??? What does this mean, exactly?

God even told me that He has blessed Leo with talent and I must cherish him.

Oh? And how did God tell you this?

If Leo had any drawback, it'd be that he wasn't Christian...but I understand this is a secular society and I have never took that personally.

Not being a Christian isn't just a "drawback," it's a death sentence. An eternal death sentence. Did you ever share the Gospel with this friend of yours who's standing every moment under the wrathful judgment of his holy Creator?

But this week a shocking revelation occurred...Leo turned out to be an aggressive atheist. A mutual friend told me that he chose atheism as a project in one of his classes and preached atheistic ideology. I was shocked.

Well, you wouldn't have been if you'd been sharing the Gospel with him as God has told you to do with those who are lost.

I never could've imagined such a wonderful friend could be such a godless monster!

"Monster"? That's a bit much. He's a lost sinner on the way to hell. He doesn't need to be labeled a monster; he needs the saving truth of the Gospel from one who knows it!

What's frightening is that he never told me about this!

Why is this frightening? If you'd been salt and light to your friend as Christ told you to be, you'd have discovered his atheist bent. If anything is frightening, it seems to me it would be your hiding the saving light of the Gospel from a friend who desperately needs to hear it.

But to me personally, what's more unacceptable is that how could God ever, EVER have had blessed this monster with talent?

It's called common grace. God makes the rain to fall on the just and the unjust. He makes beautiful sunsets for all to see. The wicked may enjoy the warmth of the Sun just as much as the righteous. Why would you object to God's goodness and grace?

For the first time, I felt as if God had pulled a prank on me!

Um, I think you are the victim of your own choices and thinking.

And needless to say, the first thing I did was ask God. God told me that He's been intending this as a lesson of forgiveness all along. He wants to see if I'd still accept this long-time friend even if he turns out to be a mocker. And I didn't know what to respond...

??? I doubt very much God told you anything of the sort. Try reading 2 Corinthians 6:14-18.

I have already quit the band and unfriended Leo. I simply personally can't accept an atheist friend. I'm devastated. I'm lost.

You also seem - and I don't mean to be rude here - very self-absorbed. Of the two of you, your friend is in a far more dire condition than you. He's on his way to hell. Sort of puts your "devastation" into perspective, don't you think?

I don't think I understand God anymore.

"Anymore"? Um, I'm not getting the impression from what you've written that you ever really understood Him.

I haven't prayed for days because I don't know how to face God. Why would God want me to love someone who hates Him? What should I do now?

Are you trolling? The Bible is very clear that God wants you to love the lost just as He does. But loving your friend doesn't mean making a bosom buddy of him. That'll have to wait 'til he's a Christian. What he needs from you is the Gospel and a commitment from you to pray for his salvation. These are the very best expressions of love for your friend that you can make toward him right now. Will you tell him and pray for him?
 
Upvote 0