Needing advice in my struggles.

andrea0601 said:

I'm not quite sure how that works either, don't you have to have a certain numbers of messages or something to write or pm someone?

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I am going to try and find that out. I thought it would be nice if we could correspond that way especially to do a Bible study together.

andrea0601 said:

As of late I have felt like a failure, I don't intentionally do anything against God, no hidden sin or anything like that. I've repented of my past, and changed. I still feel like I haven't done enough and that God doesn't want to hear me. I can't seem to break free of these thoughts. I don't pray enough, don't read my bible enough. I can't tell enough of the truth, when I accidentally misspeak when I'm not really thinking about it I dwell on it. I feel unloved and confused. I pray for guidance and help and peace but all I feel is pain, at night when I lay in my bed is when I think about it the most. My entire life seems to be in shambles right now, how do I cry loud enough to be heard? What am I doing wrong? Unrepented sin? I just need guidance and I need help.

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I get the same thing. All of my endeavors in life have been failures. But God takes care of me anyways and spared me from death on numerous occasion. I find that God will decide how our lives are handled but it does not reflect his love for us.

Those feelings you're describing I have found to be the tempter. And the more you entertain them the worse they get or longer they last. It's like opening up a channel with the devil. My advice is to reject those feelings and pray for better feelings about God. In other words, don't give the devil a playground in your heart or mind.

HTH,

Devin

Hey... so many if not ALL of us at one point in time or now.. feel like this. The mind is the enemys playground. What you do is focus on what He said in His word. There is NO NONE condemnation to them that are in Christ Jesus..He is FOR YOU not against you. He is not man.. so when He says.. I FORGIVE YOU..a YOUR the only one remembering it.. well not true.. Satan remembers.

Your Father sees you 100% pure and holy.. see the WORD says.. you are in right standing with the Father because you believe in Jesus.. its RIGHTEOUSNESS. Which sorry NONE of us can earn. Thats what gets to us.. in this world you HAVE to earn it.. you HAVE to prove it.. sorry with God..HE gets ALL the glory not us.

You know its like having kids.. I look out side and see kids that are not mine.. I dont talk to them. I dont hear them. But I have kids... I see them I hear them.. I talk to them. I love them.. no matter WHAT they do.. they are forever my kids. They STILL goof up do things wrong. I love them.. no one can take them from me. There not going anywhere.

Your IN the Fathers hands.. hmm pray ask Him to let you see YOU through HIS eyes. When you say SIN.. He shows you Christ on that CROSS! You are washed in the blood of Jesus.. that came in the flesh took away the sins of the world...And He didnt come to judge the world.. nor condemn but to save it...

So like I heard on the radio when I was in Collage.. where there WAS no internet. The preacher said "I dont think anyone has sinned more then me.. just get up dust off and keep going".. You will never be holy enough. No matter what YOU do..it will NEVER be good enough. We HAVE to by faith believe HE did it all.. He paid the price NO ONE could. He is your righteousness.. HE is your way..HE is your truth.. HE is you life. Its ALL Him. NOW that you know have Him.. He HAS set you free.. so we no longer have to sin.. we no longer have an excuses to sin. We have sin.. John tells us that.. so.. IF you sin.. confess He forgives and CLEANSES YOU FROM ALL UNRIGHTEOUSNESS.

DONT let the enemy ROB you of what HE HAS done. REJOICE..you are RIGHTEOUS before the Father.. we DONT go by FEELINGS.. I get those SAME feelings ALL the time.. I put them under the blood of JESUS! They DONT rule me. I walk by faith.. Faith that what HE said.. He will do.. I am not condemned.. I am not being judged.. Christ DID all that on the cross. Now I die daily to self.. flesh that LOVES to sin.. I dont love to sin. But until we see Him as He really is.. and we become like Him.. we walk this road..run this RACE...we OVER COME... do you see? YOUR SO LOVED! He DID already set you free.... SEE THAT... HE already DIED for you and you with Him.. He rose..so did you.. ALL not some.. ALL THINGS HAVE BECOME NEW! Your a NEW not old.. not by how you FEEL..you are a NEW CREATION... And you DO in fact sit in heavenly places.. You can BOLDLY come before Him.. He sees YOU through Christ.. what Christ ALREADY did..

So fear pops up you say.. NO God has not given me the spirit of fear but of power and love and a sound mind.. sad.. you say.. the JOY of the LORD is my strength.. ALWAYS come back with the WORD! Resist Satan and he HAS TO FLEE! For GREATER is HE that is in YOU then he thats in the world. You HAVE the mind of Christ.. ALL THINGS work out for your good..to them that are in Christ Jesus.

John 14
18 I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you. 19 Yet a little while, and the world seeth me no more; but ye see me: because I live, ye shall live also. 20 At that day ye shall know that I am in my Father, and ye in me, and I in you. 21 He that hath my commandments, and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me: and he that loveth me shall be loved of my Father, and I will love him, and will manifest myself to him. 22 Judas saith unto him, not Iscariot, Lord, how is it that thou wilt manifest thyself unto us, and not unto the world? 23 Jesus answered and said unto him, If a man love me, he will keep my words: and my Father will love him, and we will come unto him, and make our abode with him. 24 He that loveth me not keepeth not my sayings: and the word which ye hear is not mine, but the Father's which sent me.

Read your New Testament often, especially 1 John - 3 John.

andrea0601 said:

I feel that i do need to work on loving those who have hurt me in the past deeply, i have forgiven them but i avoid them due to being unsure of how to approach the situation. I do believe that might be one of the things he's working with me on, because how are you supposed to witness to someone that you can't even look at? There's definitely some things that i can't understand yet and reading these messages have really opened my eyes to some things. i really appreciate you taking your time to share your thoughts with me.

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It isn't always wrong to avoid certain people. For instance, my ex-brother-in-law was a child-molester.

andrea0601 said:

As of late I have felt like a failure, I don't intentionally do anything against God, no hidden sin or anything like that. I've repented of my past, and changed. I still feel like I haven't done enough and that God doesn't want to hear me. I can't seem to break free of these thoughts. I don't pray enough, don't read my bible enough. I can't tell enough of the truth, when I accidentally misspeak when I'm not really thinking about it I dwell on it. I feel unloved and confused. I pray for guidance and help and peace but all I feel is pain, at night when I lay in my bed is when I think about it the most. My entire life seems to be in shambles right now, how do I cry loud enough to be heard? What am I doing wrong? Unrepented sin? I just need guidance and I need help.

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You don't say anything about church in your life. I have found the encouragement of the preaching and teaching of the Word along with a small group of church members to be an enormous help for my Christian life.

Also, you use the word "feel" a lot. If we depend only on our feelings, which go up and down, God can seem far away sometimes. Love in the Bible is at heart a decision of the human will, not primarily an emotion. Ask God to shape your will to seek a Bible-believing and preaching church with small support groups and resolve to attend church and a group faithfully regardless of your feelings.

andrea0601 said:

As of late I have felt like a failure, I don't intentionally do anything against God, no hidden sin or anything like that. I've repented of my past, and changed. I still feel like I haven't done enough and that God doesn't want to hear me. I can't seem to break free of these thoughts. I don't pray enough, don't read my bible enough. I can't tell enough of the truth, when I accidentally misspeak when I'm not really thinking about it I dwell on it. I feel unloved and confused. I pray for guidance and help and peace but all I feel is pain, at night when I lay in my bed is when I think about it the most. My entire life seems to be in shambles right now, how do I cry loud enough to be heard? What am I doing wrong? Unrepented sin? I just need guidance and I need help.

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Hi andrea0601 i think you should speak to your Pastor in your congregation about this one The LORD has
ordained him with his Spirit to handle Spiritual matters in the congregation trust him he is there to help you in such matters as you listed.I dont assume anything are you saved and a Christian i ask this because i no of people whom pray and are not saved in truth most people pray before they call upon the name of the LORD again speak to your Pastor. By the way your seeking to want to please The Father at the age of 17 brings me joy also read Mat 7: 20 thru 24 these folks that they had did so so much but the LORD is in Heaven with his finger down his throat their making him sick you see. GOD bless you and dont give up remember that which the LORD has started a work in he will complete


1 What shall we say then that Abraham our father, as pertaining to the flesh, hath found?

2 For if Abraham were justified by works, he hath whereof to glory; but not before God.

3 For what saith the scripture? Abraham believed God, and it was counted unto him for righteousness.

4 Now to him that worketh is the reward not reckoned of grace, but of debt.

5 But to him that worketh not, but believeth on him that justifieth the ungodly, his faith is counted for righteousness.

6 Even as David also describeth the blessedness of the man, unto whom God imputeth righteousness without works,

7 Saying, Blessed are they whose iniquities are forgiven, and whose sins are covered.

8 Blessed is the man to whom the Lord will not impute sin.

I would ask you one thing listen to the song ( Beautiful by Mercy Me )

Think of God like a parent, He is listening and will love you no matter what. Whilst He won't always give you what you want He will give you what you need. When you accept these things you will feel better. I agree you should also speak to your doctor, I've been where you are brother and when you get help it does get easier

andrea0601 said:

As of late I have felt like a failure, I don't intentionally do anything against God, no hidden sin or anything like that. I've repented of my past, and changed. I still feel like I haven't done enough and that God doesn't want to hear me. I can't seem to break free of these thoughts. I don't pray enough, don't read my bible enough. I can't tell enough of the truth, when I accidentally misspeak when I'm not really thinking about it I dwell on it. I feel unloved and confused. I pray for guidance and help and peace but all I feel is pain, at night when I lay in my bed is when I think about it the most. My entire life seems to be in shambles right now, how do I cry loud enough to be heard? What am I doing wrong? Unrepented sin? I just need guidance and I need help.

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I can relate to a lot of what you have shared. In particularly, those nights in bed when it is just you and God and your thoughts. Away from all the distractions of daily living, and you are just at the footstool of God's throne and you just think, "Why did I do this?". I've been told a lot from people that all I need to do is accept God's grace. Accept that he has forgiven me and everything will be okay. That thought comforts me for a while, but then, I get back to that place where I am alone before God, and the same feelings come back. I thought to myself, "maybe I haven't accepted God's grace?" But then again, I do feel better after I accept it, it's just that after some time it comes back. It is like putting a bandage on a wound without applying the alcohol to deal with the infection. The bandage will cover the cut, but the infection is still taking it's course through my body.

I was in a similar place you are now, and I wanted a permanent solution to this problem. Then, God revealed to me the answer. Which is... change. I learned that God constantly wants us to conform more and more to be more like Him, and less like who we are. As Paul said,"It is no longer I who live, but Christ in me who lives" (Paraphrase). I started to realize that I wanted to go MY own way, and expect God to conform to MY will. Since I am a sinful creature, my way always led me astray and God tried to pull me back. But the more he tried, the more I resisted hearing His voice. What I had to do was break down before God and say," Okay! Whatever it is you want me to do, then I will do it! I don't care what it is or how hard it may be; tell me what it is you want me to do, and I won't make any excuses, I will do it! Then... God spoke and told me what He wanted me to do. I later regretted what I just previously wrote... Not because I was insincere in asking, rather I WAS sincere enough to get an answer, but not ready to make the necessary changes I needed to, in order to conform to God's will. Needless to say, I smashed my pride and did what God told me to do. It wasn't easy, but now I am enjoying the blessings that God had in store for me. All I needed to do was shut my mouth long enough for God to speak and when He spoke, obeyed as if my eternal soul depended on him. Ever since then, my relationship with God has been much better. I still struggle with wanting to be disobedient to God's voice, but, that initial experience helped paved the way n my mind to fight that battle of haggling with God, and just conform to His will. I've also learn that the more we DON'T listen to God's still small voice, the less we will hear it. God wants to speak to us, but what is the point if every time He does speak, we shut our ears?

I hope you can find a lesson from what I experienced that can help you in your current situation.
In peace from your brother in Christ.

andrea0601 said:

I would like to say that I do but it's so hard for me to understand, I know that nothing I do is worthy of His grace and mercy, I don't know how to please God, i mean i understand faith in Him but beyond that I feel clueless. I just feel like if i mess up in the slightest i've lost His love.

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Belonging to Christ, being a child of the Living God, isn't about "feelings".

Your feelings come and go like wind, belonging to Christ is about belief in Him and His work, no matter what is happening all around you.

God tells us in Deuteronomy 31:8

The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. "Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

Never leave you not forsake you means never.. never never never. He is with you no matter if your sad, happy, stressed out, worried. God is with you, and His love is never ending.

Jesus says:

"All those the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away."

Again with the never. .

And again Jesus says :

"And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all those he has given me, but raise them up at the last day."

I SHALL LOSE NONE

That is so powerful... belief is something inside of you. It's not a feeling, is something you do. God gives you surety that He is with you and that you will be raised up on the last Day...

So believe it. If you sin ask forgiveness and believe in that forgiveness. If you think your doing fairly well then continue in peace.. if you think you should read the Bible more then do your best..

But God? He's with you no matter what.. it's nothing to stress over, it's something to believe no matter how your feeling.

As far as not being good enough? No one is, God loves us anyway. (Praise God!) The work is all His.

andrea0601 said:

I'm not currently a member of any church and the one i now attend regularly is non-denominational Pentecostal, when i stay where im planning to move to i go to a good church of God church where i feel closer to God. i don't think either church is legalistic per say, i used to go to one like that up until 13 or 14 years of age. thank you for sharing that comforting thought with me, i really appreciate it. i feel like i have a bit of confusion in how someone can come short and still be saved and loved by God, i know that Jesus forgave me, but does he continually forgive or must i repent every day and every night even when i didnt intentionally sin? is there such thing as being good enough in His eyes and steady in the faith?

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No, there really isn't 'being good enough'. I praise God that He has revealed the saints in Scripture, who are His people, as sinners. We all come up short.

Understand, our failures and sins do not surprise God. They surprise us. We usually think we were a little better than that. But we are not. And the truth be known, we are probably worse than we think we are at this moment.

As we grow as a Christian a certain confusing thing takes place. I think the apostle Paul is the best example. Here is one who had the greatest revelation of the Church, and walking in the Spirit, and knowledge about the working of the flesh, and gave his whole life in missionary zeal to God and Christ.

But note in his walk with the Lord, in his maturity with the Lord, a progression of seeing himself before the Lord.

1.) (1 Cor. 15:9) "For I am the least of the apostle's, that am meet to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God."

2.) (Eph. 3:8) "Unto me, who am less than the least of all saints, is this grace given, that I should preach among the Gentiles the unsearchable riches of Christ."

3.) (1 Tim. 1:15) "This is a faithful saying, and worthy of all acceptation, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners; of whom I am chief."

Do you see it? Paul is getting worse in his own eyes as he grows with the Lord. He is first, the least of the apostle's. Later, he is the least of all saints. And towards the end of his life, he is the chief of sinners.

Praise God for Jesus Christ our Lord whose righteousness covers us. And when God looks at us He sees us only as righteous as Jesus Christ. We see otherwise in this our experience. But we trust God and His work of salvation "Who quickeneth the dead, and calleth those things which be not as though they were." (Rom. 9:17)

Quort

andrea0601 said:

What am I doing wrong? Unrepented sin? I just need guidance and I need help.

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You aren't doin anythin wrong, I believe that your thoughts are not your own, but in fact that of the enemy. You have to rebuke the enemy from invadin your thoughts, so that you can relax and get to sleep. Only the devil uses the tactics you described to confuse us believers, once you learn to recognize the signs you will have an easier time gettin out of that.

andrea0601 said:

i have forgiven them but i avoid them due to being unsure of how to approach the situation. I do believe that might be one of the things he's working with me on, because how are you supposed to witness to someone that you can't even look at?

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My experience is that ones really hurtful might not be able to have a conversation with communication. And we can't make someone have a reasonable conversation. And even if we forgive someone, I believe we need to pray and test if and how we should trust a person.

And be humble, ourselves, welcoming others to test us instead of blindly trusting us based on our say-so or our saying we are entitled to their unquestioning trust. People need to become able to make sure with God.

And it is good not to allow an evil person to decide how you are and what you can do. But test what God wants you to do.

prayer for you and all of us, about our impossible people

But, in some cases, Andrea . . . we have helped certain people to do what they did. So, we need to learn how not to do things which can help wrong people get to us.

For one example, I think of a serial divorcer who used charm and dressing like she is going to a inappropriate content try-out, in order to get male attention, then she would be amazed that she has married a con artist or cheater or abuser. The ones who hurt her were wrong, but she helped it to happen. She needed to change her ways, learn how to relate and how to make sure with God about who she belongs with and if and how to trust each person.

But this takes major change which is possible only with God.

andrea0601 said:

i really appreciate you taking your time to share your thoughts with me.

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I think we, not only I, appreciate you sharing with us, Andrea

andrea0601 said:

Well i dont really have a "church" i go to two different churches, one more than the other annd it's sorta hard because i cant really talk to the pastors about this stuff i dont trust them fully. i know that our feelings aren't the sole purpose of life but i'm just confused and i dont really have people to ask.

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See if you can find a local Bible Study instead of getting involved with a congregation which has a habit of putting the leader on a pedestal and following mans will instead of scripture. If your looking for someone to listen to in scripture I recommend Paul.

It sounds like to me that your flesh is at war with your spirit. Ephesians 6
This happened to me when I fully surrendered to God's will and died to myself 4 years ago. My flesh did not want to comply with the new spirit in me and I felt all the things you are feeling now. I wanted and desired to follow Christ, but I was falling left and right. The difference is I got back up again every time. I took every short coming I had to God and admitted everything to Him, hiding nothing. There were times where I did not feel like reading His Word (that still holds true for me now, but this is the battle we must overcome with Jesus), but I still read and that is key! To read His Word everyday with Jesus' Spirit is key.

If you don't know where to start reading in His Word, ask Him! I did and He broke the Bible up in 3 parts for me. He knows best for all of us!