Is there any way to quit inappropriate contentography?

overbat said:

I had this problem from years and I am losing the fight, It has taken over so bad to where I watch it almost every day and I watch more than 1 video in under 3 hours. I need help and I will gladly take any advice

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I do have a couple questions:

1. Are you married?
2. Is your wife providing for your sexual needs?

overbat said:

I had this problem from years and I am losing the fight, It has taken over so bad to where I watch it almost every day and I watch more than 1 video in under 3 hours. I need help and I will gladly take any advice

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Overcoming sin is difficult, especially that one I imagine. I have found that in the moment before I would allow myself to commit a sin because I'm tempted, praying for deliverance helps. In the prayer that the Lord Jesus gave us from Matthew 6, a verse within the prayer itself (Matthew 6:13) is a request/petition to God to lead us not into temptation, but to deliver us from evil.

Christ Jesus came to save sinners, but not only save sinners, but to give them life more abundantly. He taught us the example of living a holy life, and also strengthens us through the Holy Spirit by helping us turn from the wickedness in our lives that we couldn't normally turn from.

Practically speaking, I imagine that the temptation to watch inappropriate contentography is an "in the moment" type sin, in that, you feel that rush right before you start to watch it, and then when you begin watching it, you then feel horrible. The trick is to recognize and be cognizant of the very moment you're undergoing temptation (that feeling and desire to watch it), and then immediately pray unto God before you do anything else. Remember that he is loving and forgiving, so don't feel so guilty that you won't pray unto him; he desires that you come unto him during times of trial so that he would help you overcome it.

But the key is that you recognize the temptation and what it feels like; it's that feeling and strong desire, and then that voice comes into your head and rationalizes the sin by saying something like, "Well just this time I can do it and get away with it," or "I won't be hurting anybody by doing it," etc. That's the voice of your flesh, and of the sin within your members. The deep and dull jolt of grief that you feel when you give into that temptation is the Holy Spirit interacting with your regenerated conscience, to let you know that you sinned. When you feel that feeling, dwell on it; remember what it feels like, and remember it always comes after that voice of rationalization. Remember that you don't like that feeling, and that the sin is not worth committing because you'll just end up feeling that grief again.

And always remember to pray, pray, pray.

I hope this helps, friend.

The problem with inappropriate content or anything else is that the images can play thru your mind. You must stop these thoughts in their tracks. Dont think about them. It takes dedication which means you must want to quit. .

overbat said:

I had this problem from years and I am losing the fight, It has taken over so bad to where I watch it almost every day and I watch more than 1 video in under 3 hours. I need help and I will gladly take any advice

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As with so many of life's troubles, there is no one solution that helps everyone. I recommend that you find some way to help the less fortunate. You could volunteer at a local hospital or a food pantry or homeless shelter or assist an elderly or disabled neighbor. Sometimes churches have lists of shut-ins that could use assistance with shopping or house cleaning. If none of this appeals to you, then maybe you could examine your budget and find some way to donate money each month to a worthy relief charity to help the hungry and the homeless. While all of this may not immediately solve your problem, it should help over time and even if it does not, at least you can say that you are making a positive impact in the lives of those in need. Also, 1 Peter 4:8 says that love covers a multitude of sins. This should give you some comfort, even if you fail to break your addiction.

I agree that repentance is necessary. I guess the question is what is driving you to it? Is it just lust or is there something else? I think when things become compulsions it can often times not be about the things itself but some underlying thing that is driving one to do it.

overbat said:

I had this problem from years and I am losing the fight, It has taken over so bad to where I watch it almost every day and I watch more than 1 video in under 3 hours. I need help and I will gladly take any advice

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Many, many people have been helped by the book and the website Every Man's Battle. I pray for your freedom. It is definitely possible.

Friend, there was a recent post here about the non-profit group Fight the New Drug, which offers support to those struggling to find freedom from inappropriate content addiction. They're not a religion-based organisation (and not against religion either), but they do have some very useful resources and advice that you might find helpful. More importantly, though, see if you can find at least one person you know well and trust — a pastor at your church, maybe, or an older friend or relative — to talk to about the problem. You need support and love to break through this; you've already acknowledged you need help, which is a huge first step. And don't let yourself be ashamed to turn to God, even when you've been falling for temptation and you feel so far from Him. Guilt and shame would have us running away from God right when we most need to be running TO Him. All the strength and clarity and purity and steadfastness you need in order to overcome this are from Him and in Him. Just don't give up, don't despair — no matter how many times you seem to stumble — and as I said, find others who can help and support you directly, too. You can win your freedom and you will. Be strong, brother.

overbat said:

Thanks for the help.

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We love you and care about you and now you have us praying for you.

And I consider how I myself can create my own inappropriate contentography, in my mind, right while I am in church or the supermarket. And the women I see in real life often are much more beautiful than models on TV and in certain inappropriate content I have seen. But it isn't loving those women!!!! Jesus wants us to love and tenderly care for and pray His blessing to each woman we see or imagine; love does not have us using any woman.

So, since inappropriate content on the screen or in the mind is directly against real love, I can see why inappropriate content using can help to make a man unable or less able to genuinely love and relate well with his wife. Because the spiritual degradation of the inappropriate content can work overtime while we are not actually doing the screen or imagination stuff.

Also, it has our attention away from God.

And our character makes us able to give in to this. So, we need to seek God Himself to truly correct our nature > James 4:7, Hebrews 12:4-11, 1 John 4:17, James 5:16. And with this enjoy discovering how we become able to relate in His love.

And feed on how the Bible says to relate in love, including >

"Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you." (Ephesians 4:31-32)

As you get away from screen inappropriate content, now you also will need to stay clear of eyeballing women at church and work and in the stores, and love and care for each one. Plus, we need to become strong against arguing and complaining and other things which also are anti-love >

"Do all things without complaining and disputing, that you may become blameless and harmless, children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation," (in Philippians 2:13-16).

So, really, you need to do what we all need to be doing. So, get more into caring about the rest of us, and do not get isolated with your own problems as though you are the only one who needs correction.

overbat said:

I had this problem from years and I am losing the fight, It has taken over so bad to where I watch it almost every day and I watch more than 1 video in under 3 hours. I need help and I will gladly take any advice

Click to expand...

You can't do it yourself only God can through the Holy Spirit. So give it to Him and wait patiently. This is a good start, confessing it is a problem with your walk with Christ.

Consider that when you lust with inappropriate content or in real life you are in reality turning women (or men, or both...) into objects, denying them their intrinsic value and personality and uniqueness.They aren't things. They're people. They have lives and families and hobbies and broken-ness and needs just like you.

If you ever want to have a real relationship with a woman, or a true friendship with another man (just to keep that possibility out there, too...), you cannot think that way any longer. If people become just tools to fill a sexual need, there is no love there. You can't truly care about someone and think about them lustfully at the same time. It just doesn't work.

Even further, it will prevent you from ever sharing your faith effectively if you see people through a sexual lens all the time. If you are with someone and thinking things you shouldn't, I can guarantee you will never come near sharing your faith!

Find an accountability partner who is willing to join you in something like Covenant Eyes or XXXChurch. That way both of you are aware if the other has gone down that path again. However, for every app there is a way around it. So don't expect anything to be a foolproof solution...

Ultimately, you have to repent continuously and continue begging God for strength to say no. Be willing to make ridiculous sacrifices, if that's what it takes. I know someone who finally got rid of all internet access in his home, even though it's inconvenient.

Continuously go to God in repentance and ask for wisdom.

I do believe God will free you from this, but be prepared to fight it for years to come. Don't grow weary and cling to Him even when He seems far away.

Let's get practical. Habits are formed when the same behavior is repeated over time. Consequently abstaining from the behavior over time is required to break a habituated pattern. It's that simple and that hard.

First you have to really want to quit. Assuming you do, here are some suggestions that have worked for others.

• Identify a replacement behavior meaning whenever you feel like doing X, you occupy yourself with doing Y instead. Y possibilities are endless but some examples might be go for a walk, play a video game, find another person to hang and talk with, write in a journal, play your guitar, clean your room, etc.
• Know your triggers such as events, thoughts, or feelings that precede your watching inappropriate content. Avoid triggers if you can and if you can't, engage in your chosen replacement behavior.
• Practice thought stopping. When you think about X (inappropriate content), stop thinking about X and think about something else instead.
• Limit means. For example, make a commitment to yourself that you will only open your browser in the presence of other people, like sitting in the living room with your family.
• Sustain effort for 3 months and if you fall off the wagon start over. Don't give up.

There are many resources on the web. I think you might get more practical help doing a google search on "how to break a habit" than you will on this forum.

overbat said:

I had this problem from years and I am losing the fight, It has taken over so bad to where I watch it almost every day and I watch more than 1 video in under 3 hours. I need help and I will gladly take any advice

Click to expand...

The only advice that I can give, is to say pray more. Jesus said "Pray that you enter not into temptation, for the spirit is willing, but the flesh weak". Left to ourselves our flesh, the worldly part of us will dominate, but as we pray we receive God's desires and strength. Set aside as much time as you can to pray, and read God's word. I would say at least half to one hour per day, at bear minimum. I am not talking about a 5 minute help me God kind of prayer.

overbat said:

I had this problem from years and I am losing the fight, It has taken over so bad to where I watch it almost every day and I watch more than 1 video in under 3 hours. I need help and I will gladly take any advice

Click to expand...

There is a recovery area where you can discuss this at length with those who have been through your addiction.

Struggles with Sexuality

overbat said:

I had this problem from years and I am losing the fight, It has taken over so bad to where I watch it almost every day and I watch more than 1 video in under 3 hours. I need help and I will gladly take any advice

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Ways to overcome sin by God's Word and with the help of Jesus:

#1. Remove yourself from sinful environments.

Remove yourself from sinful environments (if possible) and or get rid of things that cause you to sin. In Genesis: Joseph had literally ran away from the temptation of sexual sin (Genesis 39:11-12). One of the commands in the New Testament is: "Flee fornication." (1 Corinthians 6:18) (Note: Paul says that what he had written should be regarded as the commandments of the Lord - 1 Corinthians 14:37) (KJV). Sometimes this running away is merely a means of escape. God provides a way of escape for us to run to so that we can bear the temptation and get through it. For 1 Corinthians 10:13 says, "There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it."

#2. Pray to God so as not to be tempted.

Pray to God so as not to be tempted. It is part of the Lord’s prayer for you to pray so as not to be tempted into sin (Matthew 6:12). God will guide and protect you if you are serious in praying for this. "Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation" (Matthew 26:41). In fact, fasting will help you with this, as well. [Staff edit].

#3. Obey God’s righteous ways.

Obey God’s righteous ways. The more you love God and love others and obey His Word and stay in His Word and pray, the more you will not even have a chance to sin or do the wrong thing. But the more you walk in God's Word by the Spirit you will not fulfill the lusts of flesh. "Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh." (Galatians 5:16). "But put ye on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make not provision for the flesh, to fulfil the lusts thereof." (Romans 13:14). "But now being made free from sin, and become servants to God, ye have your fruit unto holiness, and the end everlasting life." (Romans 6:22).

#4. When you are tempted, quote Scripture.

When you are tempted, quote Scripture. When Jesus was tempted by the devil, He quoted Scripture to defeat the devil (Matthew 4:4) (Matthew 4:7) (Matthew 4:10). So when some specific sin is bothering you, find all the verses you can that are victory verses over that particular sin. A good general verse (Especially if you are tempted to look at women in lust if you find yourself in public around a lot of people) is, “The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.” (Psalms 23:1). You can say these verses to yourself silently under your breath (with nobody hearing).

#5. Ask for prayer from other God fearing Christians.

Ask for prayer from other God fearing Christians or Godly Christians to help you to overcome certain sins. The Scriptures say, bear ye one another's burdens and thus fulfill the Law of Christ. So seek true fellowship and ask for their help. In 1 John 5, we see Christians praying for a believer who is struggling to overcome a sin (that they are confessing). "If any man see his brother sin a sin which is not unto death, he shall ask, and he shall give him life for them that sin not unto death." (1 John 5:16). A faithful Christian shall ask God to give their fellow Christian life (victory) in overcoming their sin that they are confessing (i.e. sin that is confessed is not a sin that leads unto death).

#6. Hide God’s Word in your heart.

Hide God’s Word in your heart. Memorize Scripture. David said he hid God’s Word within his heart so that he may not sin against the Lord. "Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee." (Psalms 119:11).

#7. Confess of your sins.

Confess of your sins. 1 John 1:9 says if we confess our sins he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

overbat said:

I had this problem from years and I am losing the fight, It has taken over so bad to where I watch it almost every day and I watch more than 1 video in under 3 hours. I need help and I will gladly take any advice

Click to expand...

A suggestion that has been made is to put a photo of your wife and or children or Jesus on your computer monitor . tape it there and let it speak to you when you are tempted. Prayers and Blessings

People who can quit inappropriate content essentially instantly are a VERY small minority. inappropriate content like drugs or drinking or gambling...etc are an addiction. Addictions are usually not easy to overcome.

There are many steps people take to stop addictions or lessen the chances of them doing it again. Even then some people never get over the addiction. Not that it means give up and continue the addiction. Its a battle that never ends. You can go decades without inappropriate content then one day out of the blue you suddenly crack and look at it again.

In the end pray ALOT. Get closer to the Lord. Work on finding your weakness (the moment you realize makes you stumble). Don't be afraid to ask for help. And if you want to marry, I'd tell them before hand. If you are married, tell them ASAP. The longer you wait the harder it will be.

overbat said:

I had this problem from years and I am losing the fight, It has taken over so bad to where I watch it almost every day and I watch more than 1 video in under 3 hours. I need help and I will gladly take any advice

Click to expand...

addition is addition. if you were addicted to alcohol then you would say go to AA. if it was drugs then there are similar groups available for other substance abuse. Why should we think inappropriate content is any different? seek a "sexoholic/inappropriate contentoholic" group and start becoming involved in the group and they will help you take the necessary steps to be more responsible with your life with these additions and how to manage them.

What you have admitted here is that you can't do it alone. If you don't know then talk to an AA group and see if they can direct you to something. And even if you still you can't find anyone then find a friend or more that can keep you accountable. These addiction programs follow the same steps system and you get get plugged into an internet one and go through the steps online but make sure you find a real person to be accountable with or better find a real group to get involved with.