Do you step in, or shut-up

It's very stupid, people keep picking the same kinds of people over and over again... I think there is sufficient evidence to be upset with them both, neither one of them usually want to grow, or grow up (out of the situation) (situations they get themselves in, almost every single time)...

(though maybe not in your example, I am just speaking more mainly in general cause I see this so much) (it actually "hurts me" and I don't like it and I think that's why I get upset sometimes)...

"Kids" (I think, most of the time)... Crazy Kids... Drives/driving me crazy sometimes...

God Bless!

First off, I'm a woman who has been in an abusive relationship.

To be honest, I would study the woman. Is she surprised or resigned? If surprised- this isn't habit, isn't routine yet and addressing him may do good. If she is resigned - I would ignore him and address her. Tell her that no matter what he says, there is a way out and people who will help her.

If she is resigned- pretty much anything will make the situation worse for her until she leaves, that is reality. But she needs to leave so that can't be helped. If the man is an established abuser- some random person saying something to him won't make him rethink anything. It will be her fault for drawing attention and embarrassing him.

The same applies if it is a woman verbally abusing a man.

I don't physically get between 2 adults. That is for the police to sort out because some abused women or men will swing on you to protect their abusive partner.

If it is a child - I say nothing unless it is bad enough to call the police over. Then you block the parent and don't let them leave until the police arrive.

Neogaia777 said:

It's very stupid, people keep picking the same kinds of people over and over again... I think there is sufficient evidence to be upset with them both, neither one of them usually want to grow, or grow up (out of the situation) (situations they get themselves in, almost every single time)...

(though maybe not in your example, I am just speaking more mainly in general cause I see this so much) (it actually "hurts me" and I don't like it and I think that's why I get upset sometimes)...

"Kids" (I think, most of the time)... Crazy Kids... Drives/driving me crazy sometimes...

God Bless!

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The people are broken, emotionally damaged, not stupid.

Perhaps one day you will realize that making such negative statements about people who are hurting and later stating "God Bless" might make others question everything that comes out of your mouth.

If it was bad enough, i likely would have intervened. All depends on the situation though.

PreviouslySeeking... said:

The people are broken, emotionally damaged, not stupid.

Perhaps one day you will realize that making such negative statements about people who are hurting and later stating "God Bless" might make others question everything that comes out of your mouth.

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I always say "God Bless" after everything I do, and I didn't say they were stupid, I said "it" was stupid... I used to do it, always pick the wrong girls/gals/women, and I know why now and it wasn't very smart of me at all... And I was the one who was victim of much abuse because of it, yet I had to wake-up and realize that "I was doing it", choosing it/them, and I was responsible, and only had myself to blame...

I "am sorry" BTW, and perhaps I do deserve a rebuke, but people need to "wake-up", the world is going to hell in a handbasket, and if we don't "wake up"... Well...?

I'm sorry though...

God Bless!

Ughh... Maybe I've been at this too long, been doing for what going on twelve hours straight now, been up all night, maybe need to take a break, calm down and relax and get some sleep, come at this fresh and "better" later on or tomorrow sometime...

Catch ya'll later K...?

God Bless!

Neogaia777 said:

I always say "God Bless" after everything I do, and I didn't say they were stupid, I said "it" was stupid... I used to do it, always pick the wrong girls/gals/women, and I know why now and it wasn't very smart of me at all... And I was the one who was victim of much abuse because of it, yet I had to wake-up and realize that "I was doing it", choosing it/them, and I was responsible, and only had myself to blame...

I "am sorry" BTW, and perhaps I do deserve a rebuke, but people need to "wake-up", the world is going to hell in a handbasket, and if we don't "wake up"... Well...?

I'm sorry though...

God Bless!

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I'm sorry. I don't mean to be harsh; I just didn't see your statement as helpful. Most people aren't making the conscious decision to be in destructive relationships because it is fun. Something in them is wounded and the corrosive behavior is normalized. You should also have perspective. Getting into abusive relationships isn't new. They have existed since the beginning of time. Leaving them is new. People didn't have girlfriends/boyfriends - they had spouses and were stuck for life.

PreviouslySeeking... said:

I'm sorry. I don't mean to be harsh; I just didn't see your statement as helpful. Most people aren't making the conscious decision to be in destructive relationships because it is fun. Something in them is wounded and the corrosive behavior is normalized. You should also have perspective. Getting into abusive relationships isn't new. They have existed since the beginning of time. Leaving them is new. People didn't have girlfriends/boyfriends - they had spouses and were stuck for life.

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Thanks, thank you...

Gonna take a break now, K...? (think I need to)...

God Bless!

durangodawood said:

Well he got lucky and so did you that you didnt break his skull. Cant blame you tho. Bullies have got it coming, so to speak.

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I have serious anger management issues since I was a kid. Worse, I was the scheming type.

Thank God I'm in much better control of my anger now. Everyone likes me at work, even my boss.

Zoii said:

Do I deduce that the main reason you would not intervene is fear harm may come your way?

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1 John 3:16 tells us that should not be an issue.

Dave-W said:

1 John 3:16 tells us that should not be an issue.

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Which is your brethren the woman, or the one you believe to be doing wrong?

The woman.

What about loving our enemies? even the publicans love those deemed easy to love.

Zoii said:

Do I deduce that the main reason you would not intervene is fear harm may come your way?

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Zoii, you might have to designate who this response is directed to.