Hello I'm in need of advice

robbiedaug

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Tough situation. I will say that the pot is making him calmer. So don't take that away. Pot does remove motivation, though. Try putting a low dose valium in his food (without him knowing) to calm him down. I don't know if THAT is good advice but your situation is very dire.

In jail, he will meet the worst people and maybe blame you for it. I would not suggest that you "rat him out". Not just yet.

I can't see him being violent on pot. He might be doing harder drugs like crack cocaine. Is he eating normally? Is he losing a lot of body weight?

Crack Pipe: What Does Drug Paraphernalia Look Like?
See the things they use to smoke crack and then rummage through his things to see if he has the same "gear".
He is living under YOUR roof, after all.

Crack Cocaine Symptoms and Warning Signs


Never ask if he's doing crack. He might feel cornered and become aggressive. Crack heads are hard to deal with. They lie and steal and will sell anything to buy a rock.
Locking him up in jail is not good because drugs still get inside jails and he will have to "sell himself" to get a puff.
Jail = not a good plan.
 
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St_Worm2

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...pot is making him calmer. So don't take that away.
That's not true for my son. It can be, but if the stress levels of life become to much for him to deal with (and that happens pretty easily with him), the opposite effect, aggression, is the result. Like some are "mean drunks", some are also "mean potheads". See below:

Cannabis and aggression | Cannabis Support
 
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sunshineforJesus

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robbiedaug

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That's not true for my son. It can be, but if the stress levels of life become to much for him to deal with (and that happens pretty easily with him), the opposite effect, aggression, is the result. Like some are "mean drunks", some are also "mean potheads". See below:

Cannabis and aggression | Cannabis Support
Hi St_Worm2,
I have never known a violent pothead when they're high, and i've smoked for many years. I stopped only because i eat too damned much and i gain weight and i sleep too much when i get high on pot.

I can agree some people could feel edgy or aggravated more easily when they haven't smoked for a little while because they lose that smooth, easy-going feeling of being high. But once high, they're usually pretty calm.
I don't agree 100% with what the article claims.

Pot is now legal all across Canada. They would not do that with crack or heroin or other hard drugs.

I think he might be doing something harder, or maybe he has some mental issues caused by the broken home and is using anger as a way to intimidate to get his way. Call it an "18-year-old tantrum". Like Alice Cooper said, "I'm a boy and i'm a man, I'm 18". But maybe HE is not liking being a man.

A fun-loving, drug-free but very "cool" girlfriend could help him calm down, by giving himself something else to "do" (if you catch my drift.) Women can do wonders.
From tablet 1 of the Epic of Gilgamesh
"This is the primitive man, Enkidu, who is covered in hair and lives in the wild with the animals. He is spotted by a trapper, whose livelihood is being ruined because Enkidu is uprooting his traps. The trapper tells the sun-god Shamash about the man, and it is arranged for Enkidu to be seduced by Shamhat, a temple prostitute, his first step towards being tamed. After six days and seven nights (or two weeks, according to more recent scholarship[17]) of lovemaking and teaching Enkidu about the ways of civilization, she takes Enkidu to a shepherd's camp to learn how to be civilized."


Thanks,
Robbie
 
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cmleung

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Time for some tough love. If he refuses to go to school kick him out. Call the police and have him removed. He will come around sooner or later.
There is a lot of helpful responses. Please allow me to add mine, this should give you some direction and comfort, but it requires diligence as well in prayers and trusts in the Lord.
1. I agree with HTacianas, it is time for some tough love.
In Proverbs 23:13-14 "Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you strike him with a rod, he will not die. if you strike him with the rod, you will save his soul from Sheol."
In Proverbs 19:18 "Discipline your son, for there is hope; do not set your heart on putting him to death."
Discipline doesn't mean you don't love him. If you need to kick him out, or that he needed to be disciplined in the prison system, then so be it. It is fortunate that you are in the US, because he will hear the words of the Lord in prison.
2. The prodigal son parable.
I am not saying you should just let him do whatever he wants. But ultimately, if this is what he needs to go through on his own in order for him to see the light, then let it be so. The Lord has his own timing and plans to each one of us, including your son. You, by letting him 'go' so to speak, requires you to have strong faith in the Lord, and this faith and trust will give you peace.
3. Ask yourself this questions. Why do you feel anguish if he gets in prison? What is your feeling about him getting into even more trouble with drugs, his anger, his violence, and think deeper into where these feelings are rooted from? Do you have an expectation on your son and that he is not what 'society' expected, and therefore reflect bad on you, which lead to self-blame, depression, anxiety, and shame?
These questions might sound foolish or even insensitive. Of course, all mothers (maybe not all, unfortunately) worried about their child getting into any type of trouble and in the case of your son, letting him go 'to his friends' is even sending him into the dark pit of bad and evil influence. Because if your actions and expectations of your son are not out of love, but of what your ego wanted to make yourself feel good and at peace, then the action is not a wise one. A mental health professional such as a counselor or psychologist will be able to help.
4. Pray diligently, ask Jesus for help. Jesus said, "For My yoke is easy and My burden is light". Most importantly, pray that you forgive your son, and his friends, and whatever that is going wrong. Pray that He will guide your son and get him out of darkness if He is willing.
5. Hate the sin, not the person.
6. He might not listen to you, but try your best to find community and social supports locally. Put the leaflets around. Have the options and awareness of those supports ready, for both you and your son. When he is in crisis himself, you never know he might just find help himself through little pamphlets hanging around the kitchen table without telling anyone. And most of all, find support for yourself at your church and your community. God does not intent for us to walk alone.
You will be in prayer.
God bless you
 
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Dave G.

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I feel he knows I don't want him to have a permanent record and uses it as leverage,,I need to live my life and I am not able to because of him and an explosion almost everyday
Ya well it's time to give him the boot. First set some ground rules, like he supports himself and pays into the household, no pot and what ever else you deem correct in your home.. And if he won't follow them then he needs to leave. If he won't leave have him extracted. It sounds tough but it's what he needs, he has to get out from under his moms apron strings. If he ends up in jail it's on him. I know it's tough but you aren't fixing anything this way. Part of this deal is you will be there for him when he wants to put it all back together. But actually it's long over due to toughen up here, you just can't go backwards and fix anything, only forward. So you start from today and go forward..

Incidentally, my wife says buy him the suit case.
 
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Snflwrgrl

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Hello I'm new to this forum I don't know where to turn. I am a single mother being abused by my 18 year old son. My son is repeating 12th grade for not going, he is repeating it because he is in special education for PTSD and anger management all caused by domestic violence and a really bad divorce,losing our home and my ex husbands family disowning him. My son smokes marijuana and has got me evicted from my last apartment for smoking it in the house and threatening neighbor. He badgers me and destroys my home and my things if he doesn't get money for drugs or take out food. My only option is to have him arrested or throw him out which I am having a hard time doing. I feel like giving up he is sucking the life out of me. I can't do it anymore and he won't talk to any professional I feel he is ruining his life and my life and I am having a hard time giving up on him
I don’t think we ever have to give up on our children but there’s a time we need to reach out for assistance. I sought counsel from my pastor and a Christian counselor. Both offered the support I desperately!! needed and good, sound advice. Do you have anyone like that in your life that you can talk to? You are not alone. I will be praying for you, for God’s guidance and peace with your decisions. It helped me to remind myself that God loved my son even more than I did and a book that comforted me many nights when I could not fall asleep on my own was called praying for your adult children by Stormie Omartian. It may comfort and help you too. <3
 
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Misty Girl

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There is a lot of helpful responses. Please allow me to add mine, this should give you some direction and comfort, but it requires diligence as well in prayers and trusts in the Lord.
1. I agree with HTacianas, it is time for some tough love.
In Proverbs 23:13-14 "Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you strike him with a rod, he will not die. if you strike him with the rod, you will save his soul from Sheol."
In Proverbs 19:18 "Discipline your son, for there is hope; do not set your heart on putting him to death."
Discipline doesn't mean you don't love him. If you need to kick him out, or that he needed to be disciplined in the prison system, then so be it. It is fortunate that you are in the US, because he will hear the words of the Lord in prison.
2. The prodigal son parable.
I am not saying you should just let him do whatever he wants. But ultimately, if this is what he needs to go through on his own in order for him to see the light, then let it be so. The Lord has his own timing and plans to each one of us, including your son. You, by letting him 'go' so to speak, requires you to have strong faith in the Lord, and this faith and trust will give you peace.
3. Ask yourself this questions. Why do you feel anguish if he gets in prison? What is your feeling about him getting into even more trouble with drugs, his anger, his violence, and think deeper into where these feelings are rooted from? Do you have an expectation on your son and that he is not what 'society' expected, and therefore reflect bad on you, which lead to self-blame, depression, anxiety, and shame?
These questions might sound foolish or even insensitive. Of course, all mothers (maybe not all, unfortunately) worried about their child getting into any type of trouble and in the case of your son, letting him go 'to his friends' is even sending him into the dark pit of bad and evil influence. Because if your actions and expectations of your son are not out of love, but of what your ego wanted to make yourself feel good and at peace, then the action is not a wise one. A mental health professional such as a counselor or psychologist will be able to help.
4. Pray diligently, ask Jesus for help. Jesus said, "For My yoke is easy and My burden is light". Most importantly, pray that you forgive your son, and his friends, and whatever that is going wrong. Pray that He will guide your son and get him out of darkness if He is willing.
5. Hate the sin, not the person.
6. He might not listen to you, but try your best to find community and social supports locally. Put the leaflets around. Have the options and awareness of those supports ready, for both you and your son. When he is in crisis himself, you never know he might just find help himself through little pamphlets hanging around the kitchen table without telling anyone. And most of all, find support for yourself at your church and your community. God does not intent for us to walk alone.
You will be in prayer.
God bless you
 
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Misty Girl

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There is a lot of helpful responses. Please allow me to add mine, this should give you some direction and comfort, but it requires diligence as well in prayers and trusts in the Lord.
1. I agree with HTacianas, it is time for some tough love.
In Proverbs 23:13-14 "Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you strike him with a rod, he will not die. if you strike him with the rod, you will save his soul from Sheol."
In Proverbs 19:18 "Discipline your son, for there is hope; do not set your heart on putting him to death."
Discipline doesn't mean you don't love him. If you need to kick him out, or that he needed to be disciplined in the prison system, then so be it. It is fortunate that you are in the US, because he will hear the words of the Lord in prison.
2. The prodigal son parable.
I am not saying you should just let him do whatever he wants. But ultimately, if this is what he needs to go through on his own in order for him to see the light, then let it be so. The Lord has his own timing and plans to each one of us, including your son. You, by letting him 'go' so to speak, requires you to have strong faith in the Lord, and this faith and trust will give you peace.
3. Ask yourself this questions. Why do you feel anguish if he gets in prison? What is your feeling about him getting into even more trouble with drugs, his anger, his violence, and think deeper into where these feelings are rooted from? Do you have an expectation on your son and that he is not what 'society' expected, and therefore reflect bad on you, which lead to self-blame, depression, anxiety, and shame?
These questions might sound foolish or even insensitive. Of course, all mothers (maybe not all, unfortunately) worried about their child getting into any type of trouble and in the case of your son, letting him go 'to his friends' is even sending him into the dark pit of bad and evil influence. Because if your actions and expectations of your son are not out of love, but of what your ego wanted to make yourself feel good and at peace, then the action is not a wise one. A mental health professional such as a counselor or psychologist will be able to help.
4. Pray diligently, ask Jesus for help. Jesus said, "For My yoke is easy and My burden is light". Most importantly, pray that you forgive your son, and his friends, and whatever that is going wrong. Pray that He will guide your son and get him out of darkness if He is willing.
5. Hate the sin, not the person.
6. He might not listen to you, but try your best to find community and social supports locally. Put the leaflets around. Have the options and awareness of those supports ready, for both you and your son. When he is in crisis himself, you never know he might just find help himself through little pamphlets hanging around the kitchen table without telling anyone. And most of all, find support for yourself at your church and your community. God does not intent for us to walk alone.
You will be in prayer.
God bless you
My action is out of love, I don't want him to end up in prison because I don't feel he will survive there. No parent wants their child in prison. I do not have an ego at all or care what society thinks I just want him to get the help he needs and I am going to take your advice about the pamphlets,that's a great idea
 
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robbiedaug

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My action is out of love, I don't want him to end up in prison because I don't feel he will survive there. No parent wants their child in prison. I do not have an ego at all or care what society thinks I just want him to get the help he needs and I am going to take your advice about the pamphlets,that's a great idea

Hey Misty,

I AGREE with you. DO NOT JAIL HIM, nor take a rod to him. That's assault. Do not kick him out, and do not send him away or leave him to the wolves - they don't love him.
I was a difficult child from age 6 until i was 18. I put my mom through hell.
My mom loved me, and never put me away or let anyone hit me or any doctor medicate me, and i turned out quite alright.

Earlier tonight, i had spent about three hours writing and recounting how i was in a long response, and i even though i left a whole lot out, i decided it was still too much information to admit to a bunch of strangers in a forum.
I should write a book about what i went through so you'll all want to buy it, lol. (I should be so lucky).

He's just hurting. Talk to his dad, if possible, and try to get him back into the boy's life (if he's a positive influence).

I feel for you as if you were my mom discussing a much younger, troubled me.

Be well, be strong. BE THERE.
Robbie
 
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Thess

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Misty Girl,

I want to get right to the heart of the matter. To the left of you is my yellow logo that says BSOCS. Let me explain what it is.

Believe is to submit is to obey is to confidence is to share. When our belief system is healthy, and this means also that our perception of life, the world and ourselves is healthy, our ability to make normal and healthy submission is much more likely. With a healthy belief and understanding of what it is to be fully mature, we will know not to submit to people in an unnatural way, such as submitting in rank and order. Racism is clearly about submitting in rank and order, submitting because of something so utterly insane as over a color. A color of skin. Lunatic, isn’t it? But a healthy mind has healthy beliefs and understandings, thus their ability to properly submit is heightened in likelihood. We submit to authorities in rank and order, and of course, God, but no one else. And no one has to know that you feel this way; that has nothing to do with it, for no one needs to know that you don’t need their approval to determine your self-worth. We know we’re equal. We know that we were envisioned by God first and then later created. By this, we KNOW that we are loved, thus we clearly submit to His raw Power. But we submit to no one, for no one is greater than another, neither male nor female nor Greek nor Jew.

When our submissions are in proper order, when we no longer need the approval of any human being, we will have enough courage to change the direction of our lives and begin doing the right thing. We need to obey. If we want happiness in life, there is only one logical conclusion to make in terms of how to receive happiness….we must treat others with kindness. There is no way around it. If we are harming another person, which is always what sin is about, how can we ever truly feel safe and secure? Sure, if we believe that we’re a grade-A thug, then perhaps you might giggle that you’ve gotten away with something, but I guarantee you that these crooks and schemers aren’t free. They’re looking over their backs every day. They do not know peace because they refuse to treat others properly. But if we are living rightly, if we are doing things properly and treating others well, the effect of our treatment unto others is a natural effect and it is called Confidence. We don’t necessarily need to work on confidence to develop it, instead, we should really focus on our fears, overcome them as we are clearly commanded, and once we have overcome our fears (sins), the effect is a natural one, once again called Confidence.

Confidence is a way of thinking. We see the world in a very certain and specific way that is always related to an inner feeling of self-control. Self-control, when we consistently refuse the opportunities of evil that present themselves, we feel good. We’re not proud! We just feel good inside knowing that we have overcome a specific temptation and cast it aside. Come on, no one runs around saying, “Man, I resisted my lustful temptations today!” No. We are able to walk around with a clear conscience. And to be honest, many people cannot understand what it physically feels like to have a clear conscience. We literally and physically feel different when we are confident rather than weak and insecure. Why? Because confident folks do not dwell on themselves all day and night. Quite the opposite, confident people spend most of their time thinking of the betterment of others. Confident ones are those that listen without being offended. They endure all things and lead by example. Confident people are not hypocrites, for if confidence depends on upper levels of extreme obedience, they are trustworthy for they are not known for lying, manipulating or doing anything that would remotely appear to be shady.

Now here’s the beautiful thing….when we are confident, we become transparent. We are innocent, so innocent that we can be inspected. We can hand over our phones, tablets, laptops, computers and even our home at a spot flash inspection by anyone. To the degree that we are hiding anything at all, that is the degree of our confidence, dignity, self-worth. If we are hiding nothing, we truly can stand before God with all confidence. Once we reach such a place in our climb that we can face our God, on our feet, head high and with our arms open to Him and with a humble heart, we do so because we have run the race well. Every part of our lives are in order, therefore, we realize what is important and what is now important is not me, but all others.

Now we are ready to share. Now we are ready to give of ourselves. Once we are fully confident, we become fully aware of the needs of others and we are pressed urgently to begin to act. Act how? We might give money. We might toil and labor/bleed. We might be willing to lay down our very life so that another might live. Most importantly, when we are confident, we really do need to be proud of our Jesus and what He did for us on His blood painted, iron stuffed, wooden Cross. We need to spread this Good News as we are commanded, but how can we do that if:

How can I share if I have little to no confidence? And how can I be confident if I refuse to obey and do things rightly? And why would anyone, ever, expect me to do things rightly and obey if I haven’t got a clue that my understanding of submission is all messed up? What if I don’t know that I’m submitting to something that is killing me? And how could I ever possibly know that my submissions were wrong if this problem stems from the fact that I don’t even know what in the HECK IT IS THAT I BELIEVE?!?!

This is what your son is facing. He is struggling because many, many terrible ideas have been placed into his mind, meaning that his belief system is in serious need of spot-on assistance before himself or another person become injured. This means that you must do your absolute best to not react to his behavior, because as you can see, behavior is only a symptom of the real problem. He is submitting to disadvantageous ideas of how to manage his life and that’s happening because the belief system that his parents (sorry), his entire family and all of his friends have given to him, were out of alignment without much of anything good in the middle of it all.

I know. We have a brutal mess that we’re all dealing with. If you think that this message of mine only applies to your son, nope. It applies to us all. We all have a battle, for we all have the sin nature. No one is perfect. So understanding what is happening to your son is critical. KNOWLEDGE IS POWER! So now that you understand what is happening, your job is to find a way to no longer be emotional towards him in an upset kind of way. Rather, view him as a set of facts. Set aside emotion and view your son as a challenge that does not frighten you. You see? So it needs to be you that begins to model for your son what it means, and exactly what it means to be strong and confident. This is how he will change. When he sees someone that is strong, comfortable in their own skin and is not bothered, even by him, this is the kind of person that he can respect. You show your son what it means to be confident. How? Show him that he means something to you other than your son. Show him that you value him as a man of his own. That means ask him about the word respect and what it means to him. Listen to him without fear. Respect him! Have him tell you what it is that makes him feel respected, but gently remind him that you’d prefer reasonable answers.

And really, the truth is is that you may not be the one to reach him yourself. If boys are going to take anyone seriously, it will be the man or men that they deeply respect. I know this, your son would respect you if you believed him. If you can find a way to believe in him, that is so huge. Also, place expectant confidence into his mind. Give him your vision of him that you hold in your mind….five years down the road. Tell him that you see great things and when you do, believe it with all your heart, soul and mind! If you doubt even a little, your statement of expectant confidence will come off as fake and he’ll know it. Your son is not stupid, no. His problem is that he’s brilliant and that his feelings are awake. This boy is not numb, for if he was numb, he’d be silent. So when you instill your future beliefs into him, give him that confidence of yours to him. I am telling you that if you do this, it’s almost as if your will somehow enforce these beliefs into the one in whom you believe. It’s powerful, very much like prayer, as expectant confidence works on basically the same spiritual plane, I believe.

So if and when you find a counselor, you need to find one that is going to cut to the chase just as I have. I’ve had soooo many counselors throughout my life….they’re all the same. They do not understand the fact that our culture knows nothing of Submission, Obedience and Confidence. All three of those attributes point towards what a person believes, so your counselor HAS GOT to help your son in that way as soon as possible. He needs help very quickly, but it needs to be with someone who can really get to the dead heart of the problem….something the church is absolutely clueless about. Ugg.

I know that this is a lot of text, but this is a view that we’re not sharing or reading about, but I believe it is what we need to know so that we can make best assessments of who we are, what we are and where we are. BSOCS is like a personal barometer, of sorts. I sure hope this helps!

I believe in you!
 
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cmleung

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My action is out of love, I don't want him to end up in prison because I don't feel he will survive there. No parent wants their child in prison. I do not have an ego at all or care what society thinks I just want him to get the help he needs and I am going to take your advice about the pamphlets,that's a great idea
Just wanted to add about the "rod" from scripture. Not advocating physical abuse, not suggesting you to have a physical fight with your son! Lol. It is not meant to be taken literally although the Jewish traditionally do! The point here is, discipline is tough love, you may have to do what you HAVE TO do when it comes time.
The pamphlets idea may take some time, let them be available, just don't force it upon him.
I was a bad kid too myself. In fact, I was a girl version of your son. I did run away from home, and not just move in with friends a few blocks away, but made my way to a different country on the other side of the globe. Thinking about it now, my situation could have been much worse. He is at the age of rebel, your words may not have work right now, but it does plant a seed in his mind. Most important is prayer. I have seen Jesus (long story), I know God is hearing.
 
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Thess

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Having been beaten with garden hoses and everything up to garden hoses, I can assure you that physical harm at this stage of his life will do one thing....create a murderer of self and other people. People talk about the "rod", but nothing in my imagination can ever envision Jesus laying down a beating on ANY child for any reason.

My father beat me with a belt....he almost had his throat cut that night. He's very lucky to be alive, so unless you want to put yourself in danger by causing physical harm, I do not ever recommend physical beatings. Become confident and use words; use the power of your mind to get what you want from people. It's easy....you just have to believe correctly. Once your belief system is in tact, everything else will fall into place. I cannot imagine why anyone would choose otherwise. We could become mature and confident ourselves, so as to learn how to help our children and others through genuine love and encouragement, or we could pick up an object and strike a little child with it. Man, that's just insane. Children aren't committing adultery. They aren't even capable of committing the kinds of sins that adults commit, and if the parents get to go unpunished all the time, then why should a child be struck....EVER? Do you guys have any idea of what it does to our minds, to see adults do so much more crazy and insane things than what we children have done? How does that work? Adults get drunk and wasted, yeah no problem, but if a child slips out a swear word, they receive soap to tongue followed by washcloth? I'm telling you that our hypocrisy is destroying our children. Being a child in a "Christians" home almost guarantees a difficult adulthood.

So please don't use a "rod" on your precious child. If I could council him, I would give him my time, my effort and my mind. He would receive my ears, for I would listen to him, build him up, show him that it is true, which is that he really is important. And while your son is at a point of needing desperate help, you, mom, MUST learn what it is to be confident so that you can pass along that life-giving mindset to your son. There is no way around that....we must learn to become strong, confident and bold, but also loving and kind at the exact same time. This is true love, and btw, true love never gives up. Never. It never stops believing. It focuses not on how things are today, but how they will be tomorrow. There is no room for sadness over what happened yesterday. We should never heap our sadness onto anyone, for that does nothing good. Leave sadness behind and take on maturity. Become self-controlled, which is calm under pressure. Everyone respects that.
 
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Thess

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I will say that the pot is making him calmer.
I agree, and I also believe that this plant is probably helping him to combat the bed of lies that lay in his mind, heart and soul. He's got a ton of horrible beliefs in his mind about himself that are allowing him to implode his life. His conscious belief system doesn't recognize his own value, and that the decisions that he is making today is having an effect on his tomorrow. But the cannabis gets to work and shows him the truth, which is that he is a good person deep down inside, but that people just don't understand. Cannabis is a truth medicine and it kept me alive when I was in my teens, though I didn't understand this until much later. I wanted to kill myself and others because of the ideas that they were convincing me to believe about myself, and I did believe those things, but the good side of me disagreed vehemently! Cannabis allowed my mind to be reminded that I, the good side of me, is in fact a good person and soul. Cannabis saved my life and it probably helped in preventing me from ever harming anyone physically. People who judge God's creation, the cannabis plant, do nothing other than prove their own ignorance.
 
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jsimms615

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Hello I'm new to this forum I don't know where to turn. I am a single mother being abused by my 18 year old son. My son is repeating 12th grade for not going, he is repeating it because he is in special education for PTSD and anger management all caused by domestic violence and a really bad divorce,losing our home and my ex husbands family disowning him. My son smokes marijuana and has got me evicted from my last apartment for smoking it in the house and threatening neighbor. He badgers me and destroys my home and my things if he doesn't get money for drugs or take out food. My only option is to have him arrested or throw him out which I am having a hard time doing. I feel like giving up he is sucking the life out of me. I can't do it anymore and he won't talk to any professional I feel he is ruining his life and my life and I am having a hard time giving up on him

reporting him to police is not giving up on him. It is tough love which is necessary sometimes to get a person's attention and help them turn things around. He may be the type of person who will only get help when it is court appointed that he do so
 
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Misty Girl

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reporting him to police is not giving up on him. It is tough love which is necessary sometimes to get a person's attention and help them turn things around. He may be the type of person who will only get help when it is court appointed that he do so
I just so don't want him to have a permanent police record for the rest of his life
 
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Dave G.

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How do I go about sending the Chaplin a message
Click on Forums, when the page come up look in recommended links. You will see Chaplains Office. In Chaplains office there are two categories, public and private. Click the one you want .
 
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