When the door is shut

FireDragon76

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Paidiske's heading for this topic is almost the same as something I have been asking myself, though I am dealing with a slightly unrelated issue in my own church, where I just feel like I don't fit the culture there. The only reason I stay is out of a stubborn sense of calling. But it wears me out sometimes.

Sometimes I'm very tempted to go to the local United Church of Christ or the local Metropolitan Community Church. They have a very different style of worship but maybe I'd feel like it's more my "tribe"- their social ethics are more in line with my own convictions: just like Paidiske doesn't really want to be part of a non-egalitarian religious group, I don't really like being part of a church that isn't explicitly LGBT affirming. And I find my church's 2009 statement on sexuality problematic (for very different reasons from tradtionalists). But I have alot of ties to the pastor and some people at my current church- they are pleasant people, even if I feel like I don't relate to where they are coming from.

So I often find myself wondering if by staying I am doing any good.
 
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bekkilyn

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Paidiske's heading for this topic is almost the same as something I have been asking myself, though I am dealing with a slightly unrelated issue in my own church, where I just feel like I don't fit the culture there. The only reason I stay is out of a stubborn sense of calling. But it wears me out sometimes.

Sometimes I'm very tempted to go to the local United Church of Christ or the local Metropolitan Community Church. They have a very different style of worship but maybe I'd feel like it's more my "tribe"- their social ethics are more in line with my own convictions: just like Paidiske doesn't really want to be part of a non-egalitarian religious group, I don't really like being part of a church that isn't explicitly LGBT affirming. And I find my church's 2009 statement on sexuality problematic (for very different reasons from tradtionalists). But I have alot of ties to the pastor and some people at my current church- they are pleasant people, even if I feel like I don't relate to where they are coming from.

So I often find myself wondering if by staying I am doing any good.

I would suggest spend time in prayer attempting to discern if you are really called to stay at your current church or if you are being convicted to try something new and possibly out of your comfort zone. You could try talking to the pastor (if you feel safe doing so) or maybe even see if one of the other churches has an evening service or a service on an alternate day, or even a bible study during the week. Then you could get a better feel for them to help your discernment vs. any possible "grass is greener" syndrome.
 
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Tigger45

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Being Lutheran, women’s roles run the full spectrum of openness and opportunity. There are some synods that don’t even allow women to vote, which is way over the line for me. If I was part of one of those synods now, being that I was either raised in that synod or joined with a more stricted perspective, I definitely would have to leave with a ‘you do your thing and I’ll do mine’ attitude.
 
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Endeavourer

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I don't think there is an answer that any of us could know on your behalf. Sometimes it's better to move on away from a situation without causing divisions, and sometimes a difference rises to a heresy grave enough that a division would be preferable.

I'm in the process of separating from a dearly beloved denomination that I've been a member of for 50 years, but the Lord has been gently (and sometimes not so gently) revealing a more fully faceted understanding of gender issues, the value of women in His body, etc. Even though I have not agreed with all of the tenets of this organization's positions, I was able to chew on the meat and spit out the bones, so to speak, and remain spiritually nourished.

Recently I've been studying an area where, now being convicted differently, I can no longer attend without causing divisiveness (I now reject the "headship" doctrine they believe necessitates female head coverings). I've been asked very nicely (not abusively) to please wear a head covering when attending. Because I don't feel it is an area of salvation, and I'm quite positive that any "fighting" on my part will not budge the denomination's viewpoint an inch, in my case I feel led that it's best to leave peaceably, wishing the best to all of God's dear children who still attend the church. For the most part, this church is attended by tenderhearted, welcoming and caring Christians.

If the leadership were callous hypocrites who were devils in sheep's clothing, I might make more of a commotion over the issue, taking it directly to those in true body of Christ that could be found within the congregation. Since this is not the case, I don't see a gain for God's glory in my taking the issue on and causing a division. I feel that most, if not all, of the people who are professing to be converted are sincerely so.

So, all that to say, I don't think we can give you an answer for your situation beyond search for the Lord's leading in what would best glorify his name and seek His wisdom as to whether the division is the best thing for that particular flock.
 
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