Been a Christian since I was a kid. When I was a teen, my parents stopped going to church. They still read their Bibles, prayed before meals, and lived honorable and Godly lives.
I strayed when I joined the military, but always had my faith and went to church occasionally.
When I got married, I recommitted my life and went to church every Sunday, Bible studies, raised my kids as good Christians.
Then I was cheated on and left by my Christian wife. I moved back to where I was raised and found a new church with seemingly decent and normal people. I went to several churches in the area and discovered a lot of people with serious moral and mental issues. Lots of divorce and substance abuse along with rampant sexual sin.
Seemed every time I got to know a Christian better, I discovered their ugliness.
I went online and checked out Christian forums. What I discovered was people identifying as Christians embracing communism, abortion, homosexuality, and all manner of sin and destructive behavior. The amount of obvious mental illness among Christians is staggering.
I interact with secular people and am dismayed by their cursing, gossiping, lust, and mockery of Christians.
But I am even more dismayed by the total lack of accountability or honor of the majority of Christians today. Hateful personal attacks abound on online forums. Christians making excuses for their sin and twisting the Word to justify their ugliness.
It's just all become so overwhelming lately.
I read my Bible and I pray every night, but I just don't want to fellowship with Christians anymore. It's really sad. I also don't want to hang out with non-Christians who mock my faith and curse God.
Sure, there are a few great people I've seen here and in real life, but it seems like today there is no discernible difference between Christians and non-believers.
And that seems to infer there is no power in the Word or Christ. And that is blasphemous and evil talk.
How do you reconcile the fact that Christians are no better morally and are actually plagued with more mental illness than the general population?
People who claim to be Christians are just as likely to cheat on their spouse, steal, lie, and do all manner of evil as someone who isn't a Believer.
What's the point of being a Christian if it results in absolutely no moral change in a person? Yes, there is the whole eternal salvation thing, but that is for the individual's benefit and not for the good of society.
Sorry for the rant, but I weep for the state of Christianity today.
Oh, and I asked my dad a few years ago why he and mom stopped going to church years ago. He told me because he expected non-Christians to lie to him and try to cheat him, but when a respected elder did it, it soured his whole view on the church. He decided not going to church and being around people who called themselves Christians was better for his faith than constantly being disappointed by them.
Your story sounds familiar, you are not alone; Christianity is in very rough waters these days. I can relate to your story. I am 70 years old and was converted 42 years ago, but less than 10 years ago had an awakening after a similar experience but without the divorce issue. Like your parents, I too became disillusioned with the commercial Church and started a home Church but could not get enough “Christians” together on a regular basis to have a prayer meeting, so I just stopped going. After a couple years of missing the fellowship, I returned to a small floating fellowship of believers where I presently attend.
Your story is sad but also encouraging to know that there are some Christians who know in their spirit that something is missing today. The Christians I am around justify nearly all ungodly things and reject any attempt to clear the air of worldliness: patriotism and flag-waving, wars and violence, movies and television, worldly dressing and lack of modesty, drinking and drugs, divorce, lack of discipline, pride, and vanity. The (2) things that had the greatest effect on my personal life was getting rid of the television and becoming A-political; these two things led to the entrance of much light and peace.
What I found after separating myself from many worldly things was that I reduced my circle of friends to nearly zero with the exception of the few like-minded souls of the internet. Biblical Christians are really rare. When Paul told Timothy that,
“If you live righteously you will be persecuted” he was speaking the truth. The truth of the Gospel does not sit well with the world or worldly Christians. You will find out quickly if you speak out against patriotism or for nonresistance against evil as Jesus commands in Matthew 5:39; these are two hot-potatoes that anger many nominal believers today.
Likewise, my wife and I went to Church whenever the doors were open, sent our three girls to private Christian schools, watched little T.V., never drank alcohol, went to Bible school, served in the Church yet things crumbled all around us. I prayed many times and asked God why all these things were happening in our lives, and He answered me one day by saying, “You have taught your children how to live but you never taught them how to die.” And, that is the problem with the Church and with Christians today, we have very many Christians who have never died yet they make claim to all the benefits of God. Without death, there is no rebirth or resurrection. Romans 12:1 says that we are to crawl onto the altar of God and be reduced to ashes which is our minimal service to God. After this discovery, my life changed dramatically, but the world did not change, it was still the world but the contrast was now apparent and those who knew the old me rejected the new me, and I knew I was on the right track. If they hated our Lord then they will hate you. If the world loves you then you are not doing something right.
Most of the Christians on the forums are not enlightened Christians and have not died to sin so don’t expect too much from them and if you present the truth here it will, many times, be accepted no better than anywhere else. In nearly all cases they are not looking for a chance to grow but only want to argue. Your evaluation of the forums are correct but don’t be discouraged, you be a Christian armed with the truth, real truth, and not the regurgitated nonsense of some denominational creed or preacher. The Holy Spirit is our teacher. Don’t force the New Testament to agree with your doctrine regardless of how deep-seated it has become. If you will heed to the Holy Spirit He will really guide you.
I only associate with the world when I have to, I do not laugh at their jokes or participate in their stupidity. I do not own a television although I do listen to selected Christian music but not Christian radio. I write Christian articles for my blog,
www.IndyWatchman.com, write some poetry, read extensively Christian history and apologetics, and keep a Christian photography website,
www.AncientLightPhotography.com. I help out at a rescue mission and do some visitation when I can. I fill my life with things and people who promote growth and constantly weed my garden.
Listen to what you are reading and don’t stop praying; your answers are closer than you think. The Bible tells us that there is a narrow path and a broad path that Christians follow and that most prefer the broad path. Do not fellowship with these people they will harm you, but you expose their hypocrisy, gently; there is no sense making life unduly harsh if not necessary, but be direct. Remember, that your tears are a treasure to our Lord and Father in Heaven.
It sounds like you and your dad are of the same spirit and if he sees your good example maybe it will be the start of a new fellowship of likeminded believers.
