Women, realistically how much does a guy need to make

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Wouldn't this question be better suited if it were in the Married or Engaged section of Life Stages? I don't think the majority of people here are qualified or ready to answer this. IMO
 
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Mark_CB

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Wouldn't this question be better suited if it were in the Married or Engaged section of Life Stages? I don't think the majority of people here are qualified or ready to answer this. IMO

Maybe but since I'm single it's not a married/engaged life stage question.
 
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Toro

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Im not a woman but here is all you need to focus on.

If you want a worldly woman, then your answer and numbers are going to change depending on the woman. Because that will all come down to comfort of life and lifestyle. Some women have small collections of shoes, while others could spend hundreds if not more on shoes a week. So clearly if a woman spends more on shoes in a week than you make in a week she will not be comfortable with that as she would not be able to maintain that life style IF you were to supply it (Which is what this question is geared towards..... a woman that depends on the man to make it rather than making it herself)

If you are seeking a Christian woman however, the fact that you work and are not lazy (have a direction that is agreement with her own) should suffice as she should understand. The good Lord giveth and the good Lord taketh away...... you could have a million dollar a month career today, but lose it at any moment. So her comfort/security is in the Lord not the bank account. (Of course you don't just sit on the couch eating doritos and expect the Lord to supply..... but thats where not being lazy and having a direction comes into play. There is a difference between having faith in the Lord and putting Him to the test.)
 
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kittysbecute

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I think that would depend on the women.

Imo enough to live off of with combined income is ideal. If a couple can’t afford to pay living expenses it may be wise to wait. But I know a lot of people sometimes live with extended family starting out or other times in their marriage.

I think discussing finances together before marriage would be wise.
 
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JAM2b

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This is going to vary by individual and depend on priorities and accustomed lifestyle and how flexible and understanding they are.

For me personally, considering I already have a grown son and a teenage son, I would still feel the same now that I did when I got married the first time. As long as a man is willing to do what he can to provide, then I'll trust in the Lord to carry us through. Many people are not comfortable with that, but I grew up in poverty, barely rose above poverty when I was married, and returned to it to get away from him. Most people don't want to live that way, and would not willingly choose that life.

I want to have enough. When I say that I mean for every NEED to be met in my life and my children's lives, and to be able to help them into their adult years and be able to give to my grandchildren. I want every need of my entire family met. I want to have enough, plus a little extra... but not too much.

How much is NEEDED? That will depend on your local cost of living, how large your family becomes, and what kind of needs they each have.

Proverbs 30:7-9 7 Two things I asked of You, Do not refuse me before I die: 8 Keep deception and lies far from me, Give me neither poverty nor riches; Feed me with the food that is my portion, 9 That I not be full and deny You and say, “Who is the LORD?” Or that I not be in want and steal, And profane the name of my God.
 
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Mark_CB

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6 figures is usually the starting point.
Dating is all about status, I'm aware of that..

I don't make 6, not even close.

In a romantic relationship, you risk your health, freedom, happiness, and wealth in hopes of making another person happy. Unless you can find that truly exceptional and deserving person, or they find you, it's not worth it.
 
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timewerx

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It depends on where you live. In some countries, you don't even need a job to be an eligible bachelor :)

Yes, there are countries where money does not count (they do not worship money like in USA) where all you need is personality and you take good care of yourself, that's pretty much it.

Anyway, I'm only talking about a situation where women will be chasing you. If you do not strive to become a chick magnet, money does not have to count.

There are women who don't care how much money you make.
 
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High Fidelity

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Shouldn't make a huge difference.

A person's income can change. Last month I was earning $30k a year. This month I'm earning $50k a year and they want me in a job they're paying to qualify me for in 2 years that will be $70-90k a year.

A person's circumstances can change quickly so I think while it is a consideration, it shouldn't really be a breaking point between two otherwise compatible people.
 
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timewerx

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Shouldn't make a huge difference.

A person's income can change. Last month I was earning $30k a year. This month I'm earning $50k a year and they want me in a job they're paying to qualify me for in 2 years that will be $70-90k a year.

A person's circumstances can change quickly so I think while it is a consideration, it shouldn't really be a breaking point between two otherwise compatible people.

That happens so often if you work in tech fields. If you did it right, circumstances can change dramatically for you in a good way and you'll be making 6 digits in a few years.

But not every field of work / career can offer such opportunities for advancement.

So the question can become if women would also consider men who doesn't work in lucrative fields or careers.
 
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blackribbon

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How much a man made has never been a criteria. What mattered (or matters) was he able to support himself and have the potential to support his real life dreams. He needs to be able to afford to live independently and manage what money he does have responsibly. I can and have lived within very tight financial situations because I picked the man I wanted, not the lifestyle.
 
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lovelife34

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Im not a woman but here is all you need to focus on.

If you want a worldly woman, then your answer and numbers are going to change depending on the woman. Because that will all come down to comfort of life and lifestyle. Some women have small collections of shoes, while others could spend hundreds if not more on shoes a week. So clearly if a woman spends more on shoes in a week than you make in a week she will not be comfortable with that as she would not be able to maintain that life style IF you were to supply it (Which is what this question is geared towards..... a woman that depends on the man to make it rather than making it herself)

If you are seeking a Christian woman however, the fact that you work and are not lazy (have a direction that is agreement with her own) should suffice as she should understand. The good Lord giveth and the good Lord taketh away...... you could have a million dollar a month career today, but lose it at any moment. So her comfort/security is in the Lord not the bank account. (Of course you don't just sit on the couch eating doritos and expect the Lord to supply..... but thats where not being lazy and having a direction comes into play. There is a difference between having faith in the Lord and putting Him to the test.)
He didn't ask you...unless you become a woman, don't speak for us....Joking...kind of. Your assessment of women is so inaccurate. There are so many nuances to women, the ideals of worldly and Christian women are not so contradictory. It is more individual based. I see Christian pastors who have more pairs of shoes than I'd know what to do with. I'm not impressed with shoes. Or handbags. Your comfort doesn't have to be in your bank account to want nice things. No one wants to live in poverty, or even live paycheck to paycheck. Not having enough money can put decrease years from your life. Not can, will. The trajectory of those with low SES is not good. The fact that a man works and is not lazy means nothing if you are getting evicted from your home. Anyways OP, I think both people should contribute financially and otherwise. I don't think men should rely on women for money, and I don't think women should rely on men for money. Ideally both would have enough salary to provide if the other gets laid off or there's a financial crisis.
 
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Toro

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Funny, there are other men in this thread... yet I am the one you target? Is it cause I mentioned shoes as a general example?

I stated quiet simply that there are some women that have a lot of shoes (Love shoes) and some that don't have many (Couldn't care less about shoes), all that is is stating a general fact..... but okay.

As far as my two cents, I put that in there because this is a social forum where one is free to dish out advice as this person is clearly looking for. Though he asked to hear from women I offered man to man advice whether he wants it or not. IF I were trying to speak for "all women" as you imply in "dont speak for us"... I wouldn't have stated that I was a man. What he does with that advice is on him, whether he takes it or wipes and flushes it.... it's his life.

My point was, nothing is guaranteed... money can vanish over night. Jobs/careers can be lost in the blink of an eye (There have been people where I work that made 6 figures that killed themselves when they lost said job and didn't think it would ever end). Then what? IF your marriage is based on where someone is at the moment..... what happens when there is a change? Divorce? That is why direction is far more important than where someone is.

What if they got handed a "dream job" but have no work ethic.... then they get laid off and spend their days on the couch drinking with no desire to find another job cause none will be as good as the one they lost? IF someone has a drive and a direction, even if they get laid off, they will not wallow in self pity but get up and push forward. THAT is why direction is far more important than where someone is..... where they are isn't always where they are going and where they are, wont always be where they stay. Drive wont let someone stand still for long. If two people have the same goal, they will help each other along that path cause they are reaching for the same "dream".

If a woman can't understand that things change.... she isn't to be valued as a potential wife IMO. Its NEVER the bus you see coming that hits you, its the one you DON'T see that you step in front of. Meaning none of us know what tomorrow holds and change is inevitable.

If you want to toss the baby out with the bath water because I mentioned women and shoes in the same post.... so be it.
 
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Swan7

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I'm not a worldly woman, so as long as the man I'm with (and am) follows and loves God, that's all the True security I can ever have - with God.

The worlds definition of security is illusion.
 
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