I never knew jesus is like my shadow, he has been with me my entire life

AshBlackburn said:

At times it has been difficult for me to appreciate being loved, the reason being is that i suffer with an asd (Autism spectrum disorder). In otherwords i was born mind blind. Im ashamed to say before my experience just recently i never knew who billy graham was because ive spent a life time turning from god. I found it hard to have an experience with god as ive always been an outcast with people and always felt out of place at church no matter how welcoming or inviting. My life last year hit an all time low and i desperately needed to find a reason to continue living, although i never knew it at the time my experience with god came through persecution by nottinghamshire constabulary on the 7th of novemeber 2017 which i will soon explain the significance. Then shortly after i found me and my partner living on the streets sleeping in doorways to stay out of the snow. We often used to sit in mcdonalds as it was 24hrs but often seen to be a nuisance to all. I asked god on a few occasions why was i suffering all this misjustice when ive always tried to be a good man. He reminded me that as an overweight 7 yr old boy i caught a rabbit armed with only the clothes on my back and just extreme determination to catch it, he said son if you achieved this at such a young age then changing the world was within my grasp. He told me that my pain would not be wasted, school told me i could be anything and often told my parents i misbehaved due to being bored and finding it all too easy. I asked him why i had failed in life as an adult. He told me that i hadnt failed in life and its the way that he intended for it to be, i felt ashamed because all that kept ringing in my ears for years was the parable of the talents. I say he told me but i never heard a voice, its hard to explain that i heard all this In my heart. I was almost certain that i must have been mistaken as surely i would never be worthy, surely not me. So i told my partner and i said i needed to go to church to ask the pastor/vicar/priest. On the way to church me and my partner found 20 pounds which in turn lead to us being late and not wanting to disturb the service we went the week after. I didnt get chance to speak with anybody as i didnt need to. The pastor began by saying if you think 1 man cannot change the world then your wrong and went on to explain about billy grahams passing and his lifelong achievements. I instantly felt a need to learn more about billy graham. I discovered that the night my life changed on the 7 th of november 2017 was also billy grahams final birthday, i also started to search youtube for videos of some of his sermons. In doing so i came across a prophecy made by somebody in 2012 saying billy grahams death would be a sign to thousands of people, everything that was said by benny hinn and a guest on one of his shows fits the bill but i cant find a single person apart from one other and he had started writting scriptures. Although my faith has started to become solid i still havnt a clue how im supposed to changed anything as im still struggling to clean my life up. Maybe thats the reason why im not sure where to go from here. This prophecy talks of a company of people challenging the spirits of egypt. For the last 2 to 3 years ive withdrawn from the world in a deep depression and constant lucid nightmares. Im still not sure of myself being capable of any of this but im not sure if thats the voice of the enemy trying to prevent me from entering my purpose. Really i should have mentioned all my experiences proir this one otherwise the title doesnt make much sense.

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